how tell a story and others-第4节

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of　peculiarly　mature　and　capable　Limburger　cheese　on　one　end　of　my
coffin…boxI　mean　my　box　of　guns。　　That　is　to　say；　I　know　now　that　it
was　Limburger　cheese；　but　at　that　time　I　never　had　heard　of　the　article
in　my　life；　and　of　course　was　wholly　ignorant　of　its　character。　　Well；　we
sped　through　the　wild　night；　the　bitter　storm　raged　on；　a　cheerless
misery　stole　over　me；　my　heart　went　down；　down；　down！　　The　old　expressman
made　a　brisk　remark　or　two　about　the　tempest　and　the　arctic　weather；
slammed　his　sliding　doors　to；　and　bolted　them；　closed　his　window　down
tight；　and　then　went　bustling　around；　here　and　there　and　yonder；　setting
things　to　rights；　and　all　the　time　contentedly　humming　〃Sweet　By　and　By；〃
in　a　low　tone；　and　flatting　a　good　deal。　　Presently　I　began　to　detect　a
most　evil　and　searching　odor　stealing　about　on　the　frozen　air。　　This
depressed　my　spirits　still　more；　because　of　course　I　attributed　it　to　my
poor　departed　friend。　　There　was　something　infinitely　saddening　about　his
calling　himself　to　my　remembrance　in　this　dumb　pathetic　way；　so　it　was
hard　to　keep　the　tears　back。　　Moreover；　it　distressed　me　on　account　of
the　old　expressman；　who；　I　was　afraid；　might　notice　it。　　However；　he　went
humming　tranquilly　on；　and　gave　no　sign；　and　for　this　I　was　grateful。
Grateful；　yes；　but　still　uneasy；　and　soon　I　began　to　feel　more　and　more
uneasy　every　minute；　for　every　minute　that　went　by　that　odor　thickened　up
the　more；　and　got　to　be　more　and　more　gamey　and　hard　to　stand。
Presently；　having　got　things　arranged　to　his　satisfaction；　the　expressman
got　some　wood　and　made　up　a　tremendous　fire　in　his　stove。

This　distressed　me　more　than　I　can　tell；　for　I　could　not　but　feel　that　it
was　a　mistake。　　I　was　sure　that　the　effect　would　be　deleterious　upon　my
poor　departed　friend。　　Thompsonthe　expressman's　name　was　Thompson；　as　I
found　out　in　the　course　of　the　nightnow　went　poking　around　his　car；
stopping　up　whatever　stray　cracks　he　could　find；　remarking　that　it　didn't
make　any　difference　what　kind　of　a　night　it　was　outside；　he　calculated　to
make　us　comfortable；　anyway。　　I　said　nothing；　but　I　believed　he　was　not
choosing　the　right　way。　　Meantime　he　was　humming　to　himself　just　as
before；　and　meantime；　too；　the　stove　was　getting　hotter　and　hotter；　and
the　place　closer　and　closer。　　I　felt　myself　growing　pale　and　qualmish；
but　grieved　in　silence　and　said　nothing。

Soon　I　noticed　that　the　〃Sweet　By　and　By　〃　was　gradually　fading　out；　next
it　ceased　altogether；　and　there　was　an　ominous　stillness。　　After　a　few
moments　Thompson　said；

〃Pfew！　　I　reckon　it　ain't　no　cinnamon　't　I've　loaded　up　thish…yer　stove
with！〃

He　gasped　once　or　twice；　then　moved　toward　the　cofgun…box；　stood　over
that　Limburger　cheese　part　of　a　moment；　then　came　back　and　sat　down　near
me；　looking　a　good　deal　impressed。　　After　a　contemplative　pause；　he　said；
indicating　the　box　with　a　gesture；

〃Friend　of　yourn？〃

〃Yes；〃　I　said　with　a　sigh。

〃He's　pretty　ripe；　ain't　he！〃

Nothing　further　was　said　for　perhaps　a　couple　of　minutes；　each　being　busy
with　his　own　thoughts；　then　Thompson　said；　in　a　low；　awed　voice；

〃Sometimes　it's　uncertain　whether　they're　really　gone　or　not；seem　gone；
you　knowbody　warm；　joints　limberand　so；　although　you　think　they're
gone；　you　don't　really　know。　　I've　had　cases　in　my　car。　　It's　perfectly
awful；　becuz　you　don't　know　what　minute　they'll　rise　up　and　look　at　you！〃
Then；　after　a　pause；　and　slightly　lifting　his　elbow　toward　the　box；
〃But　he　ain't　in　no　trance！　　No；　sir；　I　go　bail　for　him！〃

We　sat　some　time；　in　meditative　silence；　listening　to　the　wind　and　the
roar　of　the　train；　then　Thompson　said；　with　a　good　deal　of　feeling；

〃Well…a…well；　we've　all　got　to　go；　they　ain't　no　getting　around　it。　　Man
that　is　born　of　woman　is　of　few　days　and　far　between；　as　Scriptur'　says。
Yes；　you　look　at　it　any　way　you　want　to；　it's　awful　solemn　and　cur'us：
they　ain't　nobody　can　get　around　it；　all's　got　to　gojust　everybody；　as
you　may　say。　　One　day　you're　hearty　and　strong〃here　he　scrambled　to　his
feet　and　broke　a　pane　and　stretched　his　nose　out　at　it　a　moment　or　two；
then　sat　down　again　while　I　struggled　up　and　thrust　my　nose　out　at　the
same　place；　and　this　we　kept　on　doing　every　now　and　then〃　and　next　day
he's　cut　down　like　the　grass；　and　the　places　which　knowed　him　then　knows
him　no　more　forever；　as　Scriptur'　says。　　Yes'ndeedy；　it's　awful　solemn
and　cur'us；　but　we've　all　got　to　go；　one　time　or　another；　they　ain't　no
getting　around　it。〃

There　was　another　long　pause；　then；

〃What　did　he　die　of？〃

I　said　I　didn't　know。

〃How　long　has　he　ben　dead？〃

It　seemed　judicious　to　enlarge　the　facts　to　fit　the　probabilities；　so　I
said；

〃Two　or　three　days。〃

But　it　did　no　good；　for　Thompson　received　it　with　an　injured　look　which
plainly　said；　〃Two　or　three　years；　you　mean。〃　　Then　he　went　right　along；
placidly　ignoring　my　statement；　and　gave　his　views　at　considerable　length
upon　the　unwisdom　of　putting　off　burials　too　long。　　Then　he　lounged　off
toward　the　box；　stood　a　moment；　then　came　back　on　a　sharp　trot　and
visited　the　broken　pane；　observing；

〃'Twould　'a'　ben　a　dum　sight　better；　all　around；　if　they'd　started　him
along　last　summer。〃

Thompson　sat　down　and　buried　his　face　in　his　red　silk　handkerchief；　and
began　to　slowly　sway　and　rock　his　body　like　one　who　is　doing　his　best　to
endure　the　almost　unendurable。　　By　this　time　the　fragranceif　you　may
call　it　fragrancewas　just　about　suffocating；　as　near　as　you　can　come　at
it。　　Thompson's　face　was　turning　gray；　I　knew　mine　hadn't　any　color　left
in　it。　　By　and　by　Thompson　rested　his　forehead　in　his　left　hand；　with　his
elbow　on　his　knee；　and　sort　of　waved　his　red　handkerchief　towards　the　box
with　his　other　hand；　and　said；

〃I've　carried　a　many　a　one　of　'em；some　of　'em　considerable　overdue；
too；but；　lordy；　he　just　lays　over　'em　all！and　does　it　easy　Cap。；　they
was　heliotrope　to　HIM！〃

This　recognition　of　my　poor　friend　gratified　me；　in　spite　of　the　sad
circumstances；　because　it　had　so　much　the　sound　of　a　compliment。

Pretty　soon　it　was　plain　that　something　had　got　to　be　done。　　I　suggested
cigars。　　Thompson　thought　it　was　a　good　idea。　　He　said；

〃Likely　it'll　modify　him　some。〃

We　puffed　gingerly　along　for　a　while；　and　tried　hard　to　imagine　that
things　were　improved。　　But　it　wasn't　any　use。　　Before　very　long；　and
without　any　consultation；　both　cigars　were　quietly　dropped　from　our
nerveless　fingers　at　the　same　moment。　　Thompson　said；　with　a　sigh；

〃No；　Cap。；　it　don't　modify　him　worth　a　cent。　　Fact　is；　it　makes　him
worse；　becuz　it　appears　to　stir　up　his　ambition。　　What　do　you　reckon　we
better　do；　now？〃

I　was　not　able　to　suggest　anything；　indeed；　I　had　to　be　swallowing　and
swallowing；　all　the　time；　and　did　not　like　to　trust　myself　to　speak。
Thompson　fell　to　maundering；　in　a　desultory　and　low…spirited　way；　about
the　miserable　experiences　of　this　night；　and　he　got　to　referring　to　my
poor　friend　by　various　titles；sometimes　military　ones；　sometimes　civil
ones；　and　I　noticed　that　as　fast　as　my　poor　friend's　effectiveness　grew；
Thompson　promoted　him　accordingly；gave　him　a　bigger　title。　　Finally　he
said；

〃I've　got　an　idea。　　Suppos'　n　we　buckle　down　to　it　and　give　the　Colonel　a
bit　of　a　shove　towards　t'other　end　of　the　car？　about　ten　foot；　say。　　He
wouldn't　have　so　much　influence；　then；　don't　you　reckon？〃

I　said　it　was　a　good　scheme。　　So　we　took　in　a　good　fresh　breath　at　the
broken　pane；　calculating　to　hold　it　till　we　got　through；　then　we　went
there　and　bent　over　that　deadly　cheese　and　took　a　grip　on　the　box。
Thompson　nodded　〃All　ready；〃　and　then　we　threw　ourselves　forward　with　all
our　might；　but　Thompson　slipped；　and　slumped　down　with　his　nose　on　the
cheese；　and　his　breath　got　loose。　　He　gagged　and　gasped；　and　floundered
up　and　made　a　break　for　the　door；　pawing　the　air　and　saying　hoarsely；
〃Don't　hender　me！　gimme　the　road！　　I'm　a…dying；　gimme　the　road！〃
Out　on　the　cold　platform　I　sat　down　and　held　his　head　a　while；　and　he
revived。　　Presently　he　said；

〃Do　you　reckon　we　started　the　Gen'rul　any？〃

I　said　no；　we　hadn't　budged　him。

〃Well；　then；　that　idea's　up　the　flume。　　We　got　to　think　up　something
else。　　He's　suited　wher'　he　is；　I　reckon；　and　if　that's　the　way　he　feels
about　it；　and　has　made　up　his　mind　that　he　don't　wish　to　be　disturbed；
you　bet　he's　a…going　to　have　his　own　way　in　the　business。　　Yes；　better
leave　him　right　wher'　he　is；　long　as　he　wants　it　so；　becuz　he　holds　all
the　trumps；　don't　you　know；　and　so　it　stands　to　reason　that　the　man　that
lays　out　to　alter　his　plans　for　him　is　going　to　get　left。〃

But　we　couldn't　stay　out　there　in　that　mad　storm；　we　should　have　frozen
to　death。　　So　we　went　in　again　and　shut　the　door；　and　began　to　suffer
once　more　and　take　turns　at　the　break　in　the　window。　　By　and　by；　as　we
were　starting　away　from　a　station　where　we　had　stopped　a　moment　Thompson。
pranced　in　cheerily；　and　exclaimed；

〃We're　all　right；　now！　　I　reckon　we've　got　the　Commodore　this　time。　　I
judge　I've　got　the　stuff　here　that'll　take　the　tuck　out　of　him。〃

It　was　carbolic　acid。　　He　had　a　carboy　of　it。　　He　sprinkled　it　all　around
everywhere；　in　fact　he　drenched　everything　with　it；　rifle…box；