the woman in the alcove-第33节

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f　their　relations；　had　imputed　to　her　in　the　early　hours　of　my　ministrations。　This　you　have　already　seen　in　my　account　of　their　parting。　Whatever　his　dread；　fear　or　remorse；　there　was　no　evidence　that　she　felt　toward　him　anything　but　love　and　confidence：　but　love　and　confidence　from　her　to　him　were　in　direct　contradiction　to　the　doubts　I　had　believed　her　to　have　expressed　in　the　half…written　note　handed　to　Mrs。　Fairbrother　in　the　alcove。　Had　I　been　wrong；　then；　in　attributing　this　scrawl　to　her？　It　began　to　look　so。　Though　forbidden　to　allow　her　to　speak　on　the　one　tabooed　subject；　I　had　wit　enough　to　know　that　nothing　would　keep　her　from　it；　if　the　fate　of　Mrs。　Fairbrother　occupied　any　real　place　in　her　thoughts。

Yet　when　the　opportunity　was　given　me　one　morning　of　settling　this　fact　beyond　all　doubt；　I　own　that　my　main　feeling　was　one　of　dread。　I　feared　to　see　this　article　in　my　creed　destroyed；　lest　I　should　lose　confidence　in　the　whole。　Yet　conscience　bade　me　face　the　matter　boldly；　for　had　I　not　boasted　to　myself　that　my　one　desire　was　the　truth？

I　allude　to　the　disposition　which　Miss　Grey　showed　on　the　morning　of　the　third　day　to　do　a　little　surreptitious　writing。　You　remember　that　a　specimen　of　her　handwriting　had　been　asked　for　by　the　inspector；　and　once　had　been　earnestly　desired　by　myself。　Now　I　seemed　likely　to　have　it；　if　I　did　not　open　my　eyes　too　widely　to　the　meaning　of　her　seemingly　chance　requests。　A　little　pencil　dangled　at　the　end　of　my　watch…chain。　Would　I　let　her　see　it；　let　her　hold　it　in　her　hand　for　a　minute？　it　was　so　like　one　she　used　to　have。　Of　course　I　took　it　off；　of　course　I　let　her　retain　it　a　little　while　in　her　hand。　But　the　pencil　was　not　enough。　A　few　minutes　later　she　asked　for　a　book　to　look　atI　sometimes　let　her　look　at　pictures。　But　the　book　bothered　hershe　would　look　at　it　later；　would　I　give　her　something　to　mark　the　placethat　postal　over　there。　I　gave　her　the　postal。　She　put　it　in　the　book　and　I；　who　understood　her　thoroughly；　wondered　what　excuse　she　would　now　find　for　sending　me　into　the　other　room。　She　found　one　very　soon；　and　with　a　heavily…beating　heart　I　left　her　with　that　pencil　and　postal。　A　soft　laugh　from　her　lips　drew　me　back。　She　was　holding　up　the　postal。

〃See！　I　have　written　a　line　to　him！　Oh；　you　good；　good　nurse；　to　let　me！　You　needn't　look　so　alarmed。　It　hasn't　hurt　me　one　bit。〃

I　knew　that　it　had　not；　knew　that　such　an　exertion　was　likely　to　be　more　beneficial　than　hurtful　to　her；　or　I　should　have　found　some　excuse　for　deterring　her。　I　endeavored　to　make　my　face　more　natural。　As　she　seemed　to　want　me　to　take　the　postal　in　my　hand　I　drew　near　and　took　it。

〃The　address　looks　very　shaky；〃　she　laughed。　〃I　think　you　will　have　to　put　it　in　an　envelope。〃

I　looked　at　it；I　could　not　help　it；her　eye　was　on　me；　and　I　could　not　even　prepare　my　mind　for　the　shock　of　seeing　it　like　or　totally　unlike　the　writing　of　the　warning。　It　was　totally　unlike；　so　distinctly　unlike　that　it　was　no　longer　possible　to　attribute　those　lines　to　her　which；　according　to　Mr。　Durand's　story；　had　caused　Mrs。　Fairbrother　to　take　off　her　diamond。

〃Why；　why！〃　she　cried。　〃You　actually　look　pale。　Are　you　afraid　the　doctor　will　scold　us？　It　hasn't　hurt　me　nearly　so　much　as　lying　here　and　knowing　what　he　would　give　for　one　word　from　me。〃

〃You　are　right；　and　I　am　foolish；〃　I　answered　with　all　the　spirit　left　in　me。　〃I　should　be　gladI　am　glad　that　you　have　written　these　words。　I　will　copy　the　address　on　an　envelope　and　send　it　out　in　the　first　mail。〃

〃Thank　you；〃　she　murmured；　giving　me　back　my　pencil　with　a　sly　smile。　〃Now　I　can　sleep。　I　must　have　roses　in　my　cheeks　when　papa　comes　home。〃

And　she　bade　fair　to　have　ruddier　roses　than　myself；　for　conscience　was　working　havoc　in　my　breast。　The　theory　I　had　built　up　with　such　care；　the　theory　I　had　persisted　in　urging　upon　the　inspector　in　spite　of　his　rebuke；　was　slowly　crumbling　to　pieces　in　my　mind　with　the　falling　of　one　of　its　main　pillars。　With　the　warning　unaccounted　for　in　the　manner　I　have　stated；　there　was　a　weakness　in　my　argument　which　nothing　could　make　good。　How　could　I　tell　the　inspector；　if　ever　I　should　be　so　happy　or　so　miserable　as　to　meet　his　eye　again？　Humiliated　to　the　dust；　I　could　see　no　worth　now　in　any　of　the　arguments　I　had　advanced。　I　flew　from　one　extreme　to　the　other；　and　was　imputing　perfect　probity　to　Mr。　Grey　and　an　honorable　if　mysterious　reason　for　all　his　acts；　when　the　door　opened　and　he　came　in。　Instantly　my　last　doubt　vanished。　I　had　not　expected　him　to　return　so　soon。

He　was　glad　to　be　back；　that　I　could　see；　but　there　was　no　other　gladness　in　him。　I　had　looked　for　some　change　in　his　manner　and　appearance；that　is；　if　he　returned　at　all；but　the　one　I　saw　was　not　a　cheerful　one；　even　after　he　had　approached　his　daughter's　bedside　and　found　her　greatly　improved。　She　noticed　this　and　scrutinized　him　strangely。　He　dropped　his　eyes　and　turned　to　leave　the　room；　but　was　stopped　by　her　loving　cry；　he　came　back　and　leaned　over　her。

〃What　is　it；　father？　You　are　fatigued；　worried〃

〃No；　no；　quite　well；〃　he　hastily　assured　her。　〃But　you！　are　you　as　well　as　you　seem？〃

〃Indeed；　yes。　I　am　gaining　every　day。　See！　see！　I　shall　soon　be　able　to　sit　up。　Yesterday　I　read　a　few　words。〃

He　started；　with　a　side　glance　at　me　which　took　in　a　table　near　by　on　which　a　little　book　was　lying。

〃Oh；　a　book？〃

〃Yes；　andand　Arthur's　letters。〃

The　father　flushed；　lifted　himself；　patted　her　arm　tenderly　and　hastened　into　another　room。

Miss　Grey's　eyes　followed　him　longingly；　and　I　heard　her　give　utterance　to　a　soft　sigh。　A　few　hours　before；　this　would　have　conveyed　to　my　suspicious　mind　deep　and　mysterious　meanings；　but　I　was　seeing　everything　now　in　a　different　light；　and　I　found　myself　no　longer　inclined　either　to　exaggerate　or　to　misinterpret　these　little　marks　of　filial　solicitude。　Trying　to　rejoice　over　the　present　condition　of　my　mind；　I　was　searching　in　the　hidden　depths　of　my　nature　for　the　patience　of　which　I　stood　in　such　need；　when　every　thought　and　feeling　were　again　thrown　into　confusion　by　the　receipt　of　another　communication　from　the　inspector；　in　which　he　stated　that　something　had　occurred　to　bring　the　authorities　round　to　my　way　of　thinking　and　that　the　test　with　the　stiletto　was　to　be　made　at　once。

Could　the　irony　of　fate　go　further！　I　dropped　the　letter　half　read；　querying　if　it　were　my　duty　to　let　the　inspector　know　of　the　flaw　I　had　discovered　in　my　own　theory；　before　I　proceeded　with　the　attempt　I　had　suggested　when　I　believed　in　its　complete　soundness。　I　had　not　settled　the　question　when　I　took　the　letter　up　again。　Re…reading　its　opening　sentence；　I　was　caught　by　the　word　〃something。〃　It　was　a　very　indefinite　one；　yet　was　capable　of　covering　a　large　field。　It　must　cover　a　large　field；　or　it　could　not　have　produced　such　a　change　in　the　minds　of　these　men；　conservative　from　principle　and　in　this　instance　from　discretion。　I　would　be　satisfied　with　that　word　something　and　quit　further　thinking。　I　was　weary　of　it。　The　inspector　was　now　taking　the　initiative；　and　I　was　satisfied　to　be　his　simple　instrument　and　no　more。　Arrived　at　this　conclusion；　however；　I　read　the　rest　of　the　letter。　The　test　was　to　go　on；　but　under　different　conditions。　It　was　no　longer　to　be　made　at　my　own　discretion　and　in　the　up…stairs　room；　it　was　to　be　made　at　luncheon　hour　and　in　Mr。　Grey's　private　dining…room；　where；　if　by　any　chance　Mr。　Grey　found　himself　outraged　by　the　placing　of　this　notorious　weapon　beside　his　plate；　the　blame　could　be　laid　on　the　waiter；　who；　mistaking　his　directions；　had　placed　it　on　Mr。　Grey's　table　when　it　was　meant　for　Inspector　Dalzell's；　who　was　lunching　in　the　adjoining　room。　It　was　I；　however；　who　was　to　do　the　placing。　With　what　precautions　and　under　what　circumstances　will　presently　appear。

Fortunately；　the　hour　set　was　very　near。　Otherwise　I　do　not　know　how　I　could　have　endured　the　continued　strain　of　gazing　on　my　patient's　sweet　face；　looking　up　at　me　from　her　pillow；　with　a　shadow　over　its　beauty　which　had　not　been　there　before　her　father's　return。

And　that　father！　I　could　hear　him　pacing　the　library　floor　with　a　restlessness　that　struck　me　as　being　strangely　akin　to　my　own　inward　anguish　of　impatience　and　doubt。　What　was　he　dreading？　What　was　it　I　had　seen　darkening　his　face　and　disturbing　his　manner；　when　from　time　to　time　he　pushed　open　the　communicating　door　and　cast　an　anxious　glance　our　way；　only　to　withdraw　again　without　uttering　a　word。　Did　he　realize　that　a　crisis　was　approaching；　that　danger　menaced　him；　and　from　me？　No；　not　the　latter；　for　his　glance　never　strayed　to　me；　but　rested　solely　on　his　daughter。　I　was；　therefore；　not　connected　with　the　disturbance　in　his　thoughts。　As　far　as　that　was　concerned　I　could　proceed　fearlessly；　I　had　not　him　to　dread；　only　the　event。　That　I　did　dread；　as　any　one　must　who　saw　Miss　Grey's　face　during　these　painful　moments　and　heard　that　restless　tramp　in　the　room　beyond。

At　last　the　hour　struck；the　hour　at　which　Mr。　Grey　always　descended　to　lunch。　He　was　punctuality　itself；　and　under　ordinary　circumstances　I　could　depend　upon　his　leaving　the　room　within　five　minutes　of　the　stroke　of　one。　But　would　he　be　as　prompt　to…day？　Was　he　in　th