tea-table talk-第4节

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that　it　can　succeed　in　tickling　the　appetites　of　a　monkey。　　You　need　not　have　gone　back　so　far。　　The　noble　savage　of　today　flings　aside　his　clear　spring　water　to　snatch　at　the　missionary's　gin。　　He　will　even　discard　his　feathers；　which　at　least　were　picturesque；　for　a　chimney…pot　hat　innocent　of　nap。　Plaid　trousers　and　cheap　champagne　follow　in　due　course。　　Where　is　the　advancement？　　Civilisation　provides　us　with　more　luxuries　for　our　bodies。　　That　I　grant　you。　　Has　it　brought　us　any　real　improvement　that　could　not　have　been　arrived　at　sooner　by　other　roads？〃

〃It　has　given　us　Art；〃　said　the　Girton　Girl。

〃When　you　say　'us；'〃　replied　the　Minor　Poet；　〃I　presume　you　are　referring　to　the　one　person　in　half　a　million　to　whom　Art　is　anything　more　than　a　name。　　Dismissing　the　countless　hordes　who　have　absolutely　never　heard　the　word；　and　confining　attention　to　the　few　thousands　scattered　about　Europe　and　America　who　prate　of　it；　how　many　of　even　these　do　you　think　it　really　influences；　entering　into　their　lives；　refining；　broadening　them？　　Watch　the　faces　of　the　thin　but　conscientious　crowd　streaming　wearily　through　our　miles　of　picture　galleries　and　art　museums；　gaping；　with　guide…book　in　hand；　at　ruined　temple　or　cathedral　tower；　striving；　with　the　spirit　of　the　martyr；　to　feel　enthusiasm　for　Old　Masters　at　which；　left　to　themselves；　they　would　enjoy　a　good　laughfor　chipped　statues　which；　uninstructed；　they　would　have　mistaken　for　the　damaged　stock　of　a　suburban　tea…garden。　　Not　more　than　one　in　twelve　enjoys　what　he　is　looking　at；　and　he　by　no　means　is　bound　to　be　the　best　of　the　dozen。　　Nero　was　a　genuine　lover　of　Art；　and　in　modern　times　August　the　Strong；　of　Saxony；　'the　man　of　sin；'　as　Carlyle　calls　him；　has　left　undeniable　proof　behind　him　that　he　was　a　connoisseur　of　the　first　water。　　One　recalls　names　even　still　more　recent。　　Are　we　so　sure　that　Art　does　elevate？〃

〃You　are　talking　for　the　sake　of　talking；〃　told　him　the　Girton　Girl。

〃One　can　talk　for　the　sake　of　thinking　also；〃　reminded　her　the　Minor　Poet。　　〃The　argument　is　one　that　has　to　be　faced。　　But　admitting　that　Art　has　been　of　service　to　mankind　on　the　whole；　that　it　possesses　one…tenth　of　the　soul…forming　properties　claimed　for　it　in　the　advertisementwhich　I　take　to　be　a　generous　estimateits　effect　upon　the　world　at　large　still　remains　infinitesimal。〃

〃It　works　down；〃　maintained　the　Girton　Girl。　　〃From　the　few　it　spreads　to　the　many。〃

〃The　process　appears　to　be　somewhat　slow；〃　answered　the　Minor　Poet。　〃The　result；　for　whatever　it　may　be　worth；　we　might　have　obtained　sooner　by　doing　away　with　the　middleman。〃

〃What　middleman？〃　demanded　the　Girton　Girl。

〃The　artist；〃　explained　the　Minor　Poet；　〃the　man　who　has　turned　the　whole　thing　into　a　business；　the　shopman　who　sells　emotions　over　the　counter。　　A　Corot；　a　Turner　is；　after　all；　but　a　poor　apology　compared　with　a　walk　in　spring　through　the　Black　Forest　or　the　view　from　Hampstead　Heath　on　a　November　afternoon。　　Had　we　been　less　occupied　acquiring　'the　advantages　of　civilisation；'　working　upward　through　the　weary　centuries　to　the　city　slum；　the　corrugated…iron…　roofed　farm；　we　might　have　found　time　to　learn　to　love　the　beauty　of　the　world。　　As　it　is；　we　have　been　so　busy　'civilising'　ourselves　that　we　have　forgotten　to　live。　　We　are　like　an　old　lady　I　once　shared　a　carriage　with　across　the　Simplon　Pass。〃

〃By　the　way；〃　I　remarked；　〃one　is　going　to　be　saved　all　that　bother　in　the　future。　　They　have　nearly　completed　the　new　railway　line。　One　will　be　able　to　go　from　Domo　d'Orsola　to　Brieg　in　a　little　over　the　two　hours。　　They　tell　me　the　tunnelling　is　wonderful。〃

〃It　will　be　very　charming；〃　sighed　the　Minor　Poet。　　〃I　am　looking　forward　to　a　future　when；　thanks　to　'civilisation；'　travel　will　be　done　away　with　altogether。　　We　shall　be　sewn　up　in　a　sack　and　shot　there。　　At　the　time　I　speak　of　we　still　had　to　be　content　with　the　road　winding　through　some　of　the　most　magnificent　scenery　in　Switzerland。　　I　rather　enjoyed　the　drive　myself；　but　my　companion　was　quite　unable　to　appreciate　it。　　Not　because　she　did　not　care　for　scenery。　　As　she　explained　to　me；　she　was　passionately　fond　of　it。　But　her　luggage　claimed　all　her　attention。　　There　were　seventeen　pieces　of　it　altogether；　and　every　time　the　ancient　vehicle　lurched　or　swayed；　which　on　an　average　was　once　every　thirty　seconds；　she　was　in　terror　lest　one　or　more　of　them　should　be　jerked　out。　　Half　her　day　was　taken　up　in　counting　them　and　re…arranging　them；　and　the　only　view　in　which　she　was　interested　was　the　cloud　of　dust　behind　us。　　One　bonnet…box　did　contrive　during　the　course　of　the　journey　to　make　its　escape；　after　which　she　sat　with　her　arms　round　as　many　of　the　remaining　sixteen　articles　as　she　could　encompass；　and　sighed。〃

〃I　knew　an　Italian　countess；〃　said　the　Woman　of　the　World；　〃she　had　been　at　school　with　mamma。　　She　never　would　go　half　a　mile　out　of　her　way　for　scenery。　　'Why　should　I？'　she　would　say。　　'What　are　the　painters　for？　　If　there　is　anything　good；　let　them　bring　it　to　me　and　I　will　look　at　it。　　She　said　she　preferred　the　picture　to　the　real　thing；　it　was　so　much　more　artistic。　　In　the　landscape　itself；　she　complained；　there　was　sure　to　be　a　chimney　in　the　distance；　or　a　restaurant　in　the　foreground；　that　spoilt　the　whole　effect。　　The　artist　left　it　out。　　If　necessary；　he　could　put　in　a　cow　or　a　pretty　girl　to　help　the　thing。　　The　actual　cow；　if　it　happened　to　be　there　at　all；　would　probably　be　standing　the　wrong　way　round；　the　girl；　in　all　likelihood；　would　be　fat　and　plain；　or　be　wearing　the　wrong　hat。　The　artist　knew　precisely　the　sort　of　girl　that　ought　to　be　there；　and　saw　to　it　that　she　was　there；　with　just　the　right　sort　of　hat。　She　said　she　had　found　it　so　all　through　lifethe　poster　was　always　an　improvement　on　the　play。〃

〃It　is　rapidly　coming　to　that；〃　answered　the　Minor　Poet。　　〃Nature；　as　a　well　known　painter　once　put　it；　is　not　'creeping　up'　fast　enough　to　keep　pace　with　our　ideals。　　In　advanced　Germany　they　improve　the　waterfalls　and　ornament　the　rocks。　　In　Paris　they　paint　the　babies'　faces。〃

〃You　can　hardly　lay　the　blame　for　that　upon　civilisation；〃　pleaded　the　Girton　Girl。　　〃The　ancient　Briton　had　a　pretty　taste　in　woads。〃

〃Man's　first　feeble　steps　upon　the　upward　path　of　Art；〃　assented　the　Minor　Poet；　〃culminating　in　the　rouge…pot　and　the　hair…dye。〃

〃Come！〃　laughed　the　Old　Maid；　〃you　are　narrow…minded。　　Civilisation　has　given　us　music。　　Surely　you　will　admit　that　has　been　of　help　to　us？〃

〃My　dear　lady；〃　replied　the　Minor　Poet；　〃you　speak　of　the　one　accomplishment　with　which　Civilisation　has　had　little　or　nothing　to　do；　the　one　art　that　Nature　has　bestowed　upon　man　in　common　with　the　birds　and　insects；　the　one　intellectual　enjoyment　we　share　with　the　entire　animal　creation；　excepting　only　the　canines；　and　even　the　howling　of　the　dogone　cannot　be　suremay　be　an　honest；　however　unsatisfactory；　attempt　towards　a　music　of　his　own。　　I　had　a　fox　terrier　once　who　invariably　howled　in　tune。　　Jubal　hampered；　not　helped　us。　　He　it　was　who　stifled　music　with　the　curse　of　professionalism；　so　that　now；　like　shivering　shop…boys　paying　gate…　money　to　watch　games　they　cannot　play；　we　sit　mute　in　our　stalls　listening　to　the　paid　performer。　　But　for　the　musician；　music　might　have　been　universal。　　The　human　voice　is　still　the　finest　instrument　that　we　possess。　　We　have　allowed　it　to　rust；　the　better　to　hear　clever　manipulators　blow　through　tubes　and　twang　wires。　　The　musical　world　might　have　been　a　literal　expression。　　Civilisation　has　contracted　it　to　designate　a　coterie。〃

〃By　the　way；〃　said　the　Woman　of　the　World；　〃talking　of　music；　have　you　heard　that　last　symphony　of　Grieg's？　　It　came　in　the　last　parcel。　　I　have　been　practising　it。〃

〃Oh！　do　let　us　hear　it；〃　urged　the　Old　Maid。　　〃I　love　Grieg。〃

The　Woman　of　the　World　rose　and　opened　the　piano。

〃Myself；　I　have　always　been　of　opinion〃　I　remarked。

〃Please　don't　chatter；〃　said　the　Minor　Poet。



CHAPTER　III



〃I　never　liked　her；〃　said　the　Old　Maid；　〃I　always　knew　she　was　heartless。〃

〃To　my　thinking；〃　said　the　Minor　Poet；　〃she　has　shown　herself　a　true　woman。〃

〃Really；〃　said　the　Woman　of　the　World；　laughing；　〃I　shall　have　to　nickname　you　Dr。　　Johnson　Redivivus。　　I　believe；　were　the　subject　under　discussion；　you　would　admire　the　coiffure　of　the　Furies。　　It　would　occur　to　you　that　it　must　have　been　naturally　curly。〃

〃It　is　the　Irish　blood　flowing　in　his　veins；〃　I　told　them。　　〃He　must　always　be　'agin　the　Government。'〃

〃We　ought　to　be　grateful　to　him；〃　remarked　the　Philosopher。　　〃What　can　be　more　uninteresting　than　an　agreeable　conversation　I　mean；　a　conversationwhere　everybody　is　in　agreement？　　Disagreement；　on　the　other　hand；　is　stimulating。〃

〃Maybe　that　is　the　reason；〃　I　suggested；　〃why　modern　society　is　so　tiresome　an　affair。　　By　tabooing　all　difference　of　opinion　we　have　eliminated　all　zest　from　our　intercourse。　　Religion；　sex；　politics　any　subject　on　which　man　really　thinks；　is　scrupulously　excluded　from　all　polite　gatherings。　　Conversation　has　become　a　chorus；　or；　as　a　writer　wittily　expressed　it；　the　pursuit　of　the　obvious　to　no　conclusion。　　When　not　occupied　with　mumbling；　'I　quite　agree　with　you''As　you　say''That　is　precisely　my　opini