up from slavery-第4节

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e　latest　news。　The　mail…carrier　on　his　way　back　to　our　master's　house　would　as　naturally　retail　the　news　that　he　had　secured　among　the　slaves；　and　in　this　way　they　often　heard　of　important　events　before　the　white　people　at　the　〃big　house；〃　as　the　master's　house　was　called。

I　cannot　remember　a　single　instance　during　my　childhood　or　early　boyhood　when　our　entire　family　sat　down　to　the　table　together；　and　God's　blessing　was　asked；　and　the　family　ate　a　meal　in　a　civilized　manner。　On　the　plantation　in　Virginia；　and　even　later；　meals　were　gotten　by　the　children　very　much　as　dumb　animals　get　theirs。　It　was　a　piece　of　bread　here　and　a　scrap　of　meat　there。　It　was　a　cup　of　milk　at　one　time　and　some　potatoes　at　another。　Sometimes　a　portion　of　our　family　would　eat　out　of　the　skillet　or　pot；　while　some　one　else　would　eat　from　a　tin　plate　held　on　the　knees；　and　often　using　nothing　but　the　hands　with　which　to　hold　the　food。　When　I　had　grown　to　sufficient　size；　I　was　required　to　go　to　the　〃big　house〃　at　meal…times　to　fan　the　flies　from　the　table　by　means　of　a　large　set　of　paper　fans　operated　by　a　pulley。　Naturally　much　of　the　conversation　of　the　white　people　turned　upon　the　subject　of　freedom　and　the　war；　and　I　absorbed　a　good　deal　of　it。　I　remember　that　at　one　time　I　saw　two　of　my　young　mistresses　and　some　lady　visitors　eating　ginger…cakes；　in　the　yard。　At　that　time　those　cakes　seemed　to　me　to　be　absolutely　the　most　tempting　and　desirable　things　that　I　had　ever　seen；　and　I　then　and　there　resolved　that；　if　I　ever　got　free；　the　height　of　my　ambition　would　be　reached　if　I　could　get　to　the　point　where　I　could　secure　and　eat　ginger…cakes　in　the　way　that　I　saw　those　ladies　doing。

Of　course　as　the　war　was　prolonged　the　white　people；　in　many　cases；　often　found　it　difficult　to　secure　food　for　themselves。　I　think　the　slaves　felt　the　deprivation　less　than　the　whites；　because　the　usual　diet　for　slaves　was　corn　bread　and　pork；　and　these　could　be　raised　on　the　plantation；　but　coffee；　tea；　sugar；　and　other　articles　which　the　whites　had　been　accustomed　to　use　could　not　be　raised　on　the　plantation；　and　the　conditions　brought　about　by　the　war　frequently　made　it　impossible　to　secure　these　things。　The　whites　were　often　in　great　straits。　Parched　corn　was　used　for　coffee；　and　a　kind　of　black　molasses　was　used　instead　of　sugar。　Many　times　nothing　was　used　to　sweeten　the　so…called　tea　and　coffee。

The　first　pair　of　shoes　that　I　recall　wearing　were　wooden　ones。　They　had　rough　leather　on　the　top；　but　the　bottoms；　which　were　about　an　inch　thick；　were　of　wood。　When　I　walked　they　made　a　fearful　noise；　and　besides　this　they　were　very　inconvenient；　since　there　was　no　yielding　to　the　natural　pressure　of　the　foot。　In　wearing　them　one　presented　and　exceedingly　awkward　appearance。　The　most　trying　ordeal　that　I　was　forced　to　endure　as　a　slave　boy；　however；　was　the　wearing　of　a　flax　shirt。　In　the　portion　of　Virginia　where　I　lived　it　was　common　to　use　flax　as　part　of　the　clothing　for　the　slaves。　That　part　of　the　flax　from　which　our　clothing　was　made　was　largely　the　refuse；　which　of　course　was　the　cheapest　and　roughest　part。　I　can　scarcely　imagine　any　torture；　except；　perhaps；　the　pulling　of　a　tooth；　that　is　equal　to　that　caused　by　putting　on　a　new　flax　shirt　for　the　first　time。　It　is　almost　equal　to　the　feeling　that　one　would　experience　if　he　had　a　dozen　or　more　chestnut　burrs；　or　a　hundred　small　pin…points；　in　contact　with　his　flesh。　Even　to　this　day　I　can　recall　accurately　the　tortures　that　I　underwent　when　putting　on　one　of　these　garments。　The　fact　that　my　flesh　was　soft　and　tender　added　to　the　pain。　But　I　had　no　choice。　I　had　to　wear　the　flax　shirt　or　none；　and　had　it　been　left　to　me　to　choose；　I　should　have　chosen　to　wear　no　covering。　In　connection　with　the　flax　shirt；　my　brother　John；　who　is　several　years　older　than　I　am；　performed　one　of　the　most　generous　acts　that　I　ever　heard　of　one　slave　relative　doing　for　another。　On　several　occasions　when　I　was　being　forced　to　wear　a　new　flax　shirt；　he　generously　agreed　to　put　it　on　in　my　stead　and　wear　it　for　several　days；　till　it　was　〃broken　in。〃　Until　I　had　grown　to　be　quite　a　youth　this　single　garment　was　all　that　I　wore。

One　may　get　the　idea；　from　what　I　have　said；　that　there　was　bitter　feeling　toward　the　white　people　on　the　part　of　my　race；　because　of　the　fact　that　most　of　the　white　population　was　away　fighting　in　a　war　which　would　result　in　keeping　the　Negro　in　slavery　if　the　South　was　successful。　In　the　case　of　the　slaves　on　our　place　this　was　not　true；　and　it　was　not　true　of　any　large　portion　of　the　slave　population　in　the　South　where　the　Negro　was　treated　with　anything　like　decency。　During　the　Civil　War　one　of　my　young　masters　was　killed；　and　two　were　severely　wounded。　I　recall　the　feeling　of　sorrow　which　existed　among　the　slaves　when　they　heard　of　the　death　of　〃Mars'　Billy。〃　It　was　no　sham　sorrow；　but　real。　Some　of　the　slaves　had　nursed　〃Mars'　Billy〃；　others　had　played　with　him　when　he　was　a　child。　〃Mars'　Billy〃　had　begged　for　mercy　in　the　case　of　others　when　the　overseer　or　master　was　thrashing　them。　The　sorrow　in　the　slave　quarter　was　only　second　to　that　in　the　〃big　house。〃　When　the　two　young　masters　were　brought　home　wounded；　the　sympathy　of　the　slaves　was　shown　in　many　ways。　They　were　just　as　anxious　to　assist　in　the　nursing　as　the　family　relatives　of　the　wounded。　Some　of　the　slaves　would　even　beg　for　the　privilege　of　sitting　up　at　night　to　nurse　their　wounded　masters。　This　tenderness　and　sympathy　on　the　part　of　those　held　in　bondage　was　a　result　of　their　kindly　and　generous　nature。　In　order　to　defend　and　protect　the　women　and　children　who　were　left　on　the　plantations　when　the　white　males　went　to　war；　the　slaves　would　have　laid　down　their　lives。　The　slave　who　was　selected　to　sleep　in　the　〃big　house〃　during　the　absence　of　the　males　was　considered　to　have　the　place　of　honour。　Any　one　attempting　to　harm　〃young　Mistress〃　or　〃old　Mistress〃　during　the　night　would　have　had　to　cross　the　dead　body　of　the　slave　to　do　so。　I　do　not　know　how　many　have　noticed　it；　but　I　think　that　it　will　be　found　to　be　true　that　there　are　few　instances；　either　in　slavery　or　freedom；　in　which　a　member　of　my　race　has　been　known　to　betray　a　specific　trust。

As　a　rule；　not　only　did　the　members　of　my　race　entertain　no　feelings　of　bitterness　against　the　whites　before　and　during　the　war；　but　there　are　many　instances　of　Negroes　tenderly　carrying　for　their　former　masters　and　mistresses　who　for　some　reason　have　become　poor　and　dependent　since　the　war。　I　know　of　instances　where　the　former　masters　of　slaves　have　for　years　been　supplied　with　money　by　their　former　slaves　to　keep　them　from　suffering。　I　have　known　of　still　other　cases　in　which　the　former　slaves　have　assisted　in　the　education　of　the　descendants　of　their　former　owners。　I　know　of　a　case　on　a　large　plantation　in　the　South　in　which　a　young　white　man；　the　son　of　the　former　owner　of　the　estate；　has　become　so　reduced　in　purse　and　self…control　by　reason　of　drink　that　he　is　a　pitiable　creature；　and　yet；　notwithstanding　the　poverty　of　the　coloured　people　themselves　on　this　plantation；　they　have　for　years　supplied　this　young　white　man　with　the　necessities　of　life。　One　sends　him　a　little　coffee　or　sugar；　another　a　little　meat；　and　so　on。　Nothing　that　the　coloured　people　possess　is　too　good　for　the　son　of　〃old　Mars'　Tom；〃　who　will　perhaps　never　be　permitted　to　suffer　while　any　remain　on　the　place　who　knew　directly　or　indirectly　of　〃old　Mars'　Tom。〃

I　have　said　that　there　are　few　instances　of　a　member　of　my　race　betraying　a　specific　trust。　One　of　the　best　illustrations　of　this　which　I　know　of　is　in　the　case　of　an　ex…slave　from　Virginia　whom　I　met　not　long　ago　in　a　little　town　in　the　state　of　Ohio。　I　found　that　this　man　had　made　a　contract　with　his　master；　two　or　three　years　previous　to　the　Emancipation　Proclamation；　to　the　effect　that　the　slave　was　to　be　permitted　to　buy　himself；　by　paying　so　much　per　year　for　his　body；　and　while　he　was　paying　for　himself；　he　was　to　be　permitted　to　labour　where　and　for　whom　he　pleased。　Finding　that　he　could　secure　better　wages　in　Ohio；　he　went　there。　When　freedom　came；　he　was　still　in　debt　to　his　master　some　three　hundred　dollars。　Notwithstanding　that　the　Emancipation　Proclamation　freed　him　from　any　obligation　to　his　master；　this　black　man　walked　the　greater　portion　of　the　distance　back　to　where　his　old　master　lived　in　Virginia；　and　placed　the　last　dollar；　with　interest；　in　his　hands。　In　talking　to　me　about　this；　the　man　told　me　that　he　knew　that　he　did　not　have　to　pay　the　debt；　but　that　he　had　given　his　word　to　the　master；　and　his　word　he　had　never　broken。　He　felt　that　he　could　not　enjoy　his　freedom　till　he　had　fulfilled　his　promise。

From　some　things　that　I　have　said　one　may　get　the　idea　that　some　of　the　slaves　did　not　want　freedom。　This　is　not　true。　I　have　never　seen　one　who　did　not　want　to　be　free；　or　one　who　would　return　to　slavery。

I　pity　from　the　bottom　of　my　heart　any　nation　or　body　of　people　that　is　so　unfortunate　as　to　get　entangled　in　the　net　of　slavery。　I　have　long　since　ceased　to　cherish　any　spirit　of　bitterness　against　the　Southern　white　people　on　account　of　the　enslavement　of　my　race。　No　one　section　of　our　country　was　wholly　responsible　for　its　introductio