roads of destiny-第57节

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〃They　woke　up　the　court　interpreter；　an　American　named　Jenks；　who　was　in　the　rum　business　and　vice　versa；　and　told　him　to　translate　the　verdict。

〃Jenks　stretched　himself　and　took　a　morphine　tablet。

〃'You've　got　to　back　up　against　th'　'dobe；　old　man；'　says　he　to　me。　'Three　weeks；　I　believe；　you　get。　Haven't　got　a　chew　of　fine…cut　on　you；　have　you？'

〃'Translate　that　again；　with　foot…notes　and　a　glossary；'　says　I。　'I　don't　know　whether　I'm　discharged；　condemned；　or　handed　over　to　the　Gerry　Society。'

〃'Oh；'　says　Jenks；　'don't　you　understand？　You're　to　be　stood　up　against　a　'dobe　wall　and　shot　in　two　or　three　weeksthree；　I　think；　they　said。'

〃'Would　you　mind　asking　'em　which？'　says　I。　'A　week　don't　amount　to　much　after　you're　dead；　but　it　seems　a　real　nice　long　spell　while　you　are　alive。'

〃'It's　two　weeks；'　says　the　interpreter；　after　inquiring　in　Spanish　of　the　court。　'Shall　I　ask　'em　again？'

〃'Let　be；'　says　I。　'Let's　have　a　stationary　verdict。　If　I　keep　on　appealing　this　way　they'll　have　me　shot　about　ten　days　before　I　was　captured。　No；　I　haven't　got　any　fine…cut。'

〃They　sends　me　over　to　the　/calaboza/　with　a　detachment　of　coloured　postal…telegraph　boys　carrying　Enfield　rifles；　and　I　am　locked　up　in　a　kind　of　brick　bakery。　The　temperature　in　there　was　just　about　the　kind　mentioned　in　the　cooking　recipes　that　call　for　a　quick　oven。

〃Then　I　gives　a　silver　dollar　to　one　of　the　guards　to　send　for　the　United　States　consul。　He　comes　around　in　pajamas；　with　a　pair　of　glasses　on　his　nose　and　a　dozen　or　two　inside　of　him。

〃'I'm　to　be　shot　in　two　weeks；'　says　I。　'And　although　I've　made　a　memorandum　of　it；　I　don't　seem　to　get　it　off　my　mind。　You　want　to　call　up　Uncle　Sam　on　the　cable　as　quick　as　you　can　and　get　him　all　worked　up　about　it。　Have　'em　send　the　/Kentucky/　and　the　/Kearsage/　and　the　/Oregon/　down　right　away。　That'll　be　about　enough　battleships；　but　it　wouldn't　hurt　to　have　a　couple　of　cruisers　and　a　torpedo…boat　destroyer；　too。　Andsay；　if　Dewey　isn't　busy；　better　have　him　come　along　on　the　fastest　one　of　the　fleet。'

〃'Now；　see　here；　O'Keefe；'　says　the　consul；　getting　the　best　of　a　hiccup；　'what　do　you　want　to　bother　the　State　Department　about　this　matter　for？'

〃'Didn't　you　hear　me？'　says　I；　'I'm　to　be　shot　in　two　weeks。　Did　you　think　I　said　I　was　going　to　a　lawn…party？　And　it　wouldn't　hurt　of　Roosevelt　could　get　the　Japs　to　send　down　the　/Yellowyamtiskookum/　or　the　/Ogotosingsing/　or　some　other　first…class　cruisers　to　help。　It　would　make　me　feel　safer。'

〃'Now；　what　you　want；'　says　the　consul；　'is　not　to　get　excited。　I'll　send　you　over　some　chewing　tobacco　and　some　banana　fritters　when　I　go　back。　The　United　States　can't　interfere　in　this。　You　know　you　were　caught　insurging　against　the　government；　and　you're　subject　to　the　laws　of　this　country。　To　tell　the　truth；　I've　had　an　intimation　from　the　State　Departmentunofficially；　of　coursethat　whenever　a　soldier　of　fortune　demands　a　fleet　of　gunboats　in　a　case　of　revolutionary　/katzenjammer/；　I　should　cut　the　cable；　give　him　all　the　tobacco　he　wants；　and　after　he's　shot　take　his　clothes；　if　they　fit　me；　for　part　payment　of　my　salary。'

〃'Consul；'　says　I　to　him；　'this　is　a　serious　question。　You　are　representing　Uncle　Sam。　This　ain't　any　little　international　tomfoolery；　like　a　universal　peace　congress　or　the　christening　of　the　/Shamrock　IV/。　I'm　an　American　citizen　and　I　demand　protection。　I　demand　the　Mosquito　fleet；　and　Schley；　and　the　Atlantic　squadron；　and　Bob　Evans；　and　General　E。　Byrd　Grubb；　and　two　or　three　protocols。　What　are　you　going　to　do　about　it？'

〃'Nothing　doing；'　says　the　consul。

〃'Be　off　with　you；　then；'　says　I；　out　of　patience　with　him；　'and　send　me　Doc　Millikin。　Ask　Doc　to　come　and　see　me。'

〃Doc　comes　and　looks　through　the　bars　at　me；　surrounded　by　dirty　soldiers；　with　even　my　shoes　and　canteen　confiscated；　and　he　looks　mightily　pleased。

〃'Hello；　Yank；'　says　he；　'getting　a　little　taste　of　Johnson's　Island；　now；　ain't　ye？'

〃'Doc；'　says　I；　'I've　just　had　an　interview　with　the　U。S。　consul。　I　gather　from　his　remarks　that　I　might　just　as　well　have　been　caught　selling　suspenders　in　Kishineff　under　the　name　of　Rosenstein　as　to　be　in　my　present　condition。　It　seems　that　the　only　maritime　aid　I　am　to　receive　from　the　United　States　is　some　navy…plug　to　chew。　Doc；'　says　I；　'can't　you　suspend　hostility　on　the　slavery　question　long　enough　to　do　something　for　me？'

〃'It　ain't　been　my　habit；'　Doc　Millikin　answers；　'to　do　any　painless　dentistry　when　I　find　a　Yank　cutting　an　eye…tooth。　So　the　Stars　and　Stripes　ain't　lending　any　marines　to　shell　the　huts　of　the　Colombian　cannibals；　hey？　Oh；　say；　can　you　see　by　the　dawn's　early　light　the　star…spangled　banner　has　fluked　in　the　fight？　What's　the　matter　with　the　War　Department；　hey？　It's　a　great　thing　to　be　a　citizen　of　a　gold…　standard　nation；　ain't　it？'

〃'Rub　it　in；　Doc；　all　you　want；'　says　I。　'I　guess　we're　weak　on　foreign　policy。'

〃'For　a　Yank；'　says　Doc；　putting　on　his　specs　and　talking　more　mild；　'you　ain't　so　bad。　If　you　had　come　from　below　the　line　I　reckon　I　would　have　liked　you　right　smart。　Now　since　your　country　has　gone　back　on　you；　you　have　to　come　to　the　old　doctor　whose　cotton　you　burned　and　whose　mules　who　stole　and　whose　niggers　you　freed　to　help　you。　Ain't　that　so；　Yank？'

〃'It　is；'　says　I　heartily；　'and　let's　have　a　diagnosis　of　the　case　right　away；　for　in　two　weeks'　time　all　you　can　do　is　to　hold　an　autopsy　and　I　don't　want　to　be　amputated　if　I　can　help　it。'

〃'Now；'　says　Doc；　business…like；　'it's　easy　enough　for　you　to　get　out　of　this　scrape。　Money'll　do　it。　You've　got　to　pay　a　long　string　of　'em　from　General　Pomposo　down　to　this　anthropoid　ape　guarding　your　door。　About　10；000　will　do　the　trick。　Have　you　got　the　money？'

〃'Me？'　says　I。　'I've　got　one　Chili　dollar；　two　/real/　pieces；　and　a　/medio/。'

〃'Then　if　you've　any　last　words；　utter　'em；'　says　that　old　reb。　'The　roster　of　your　financial　budget　sounds　quite　much　to　be　like　the　noise　of　a　requiem。'

〃'Change　the　treatment；'　says　I。　'I　admit　that　I'm　short。　Call　a　consultation　or　use　radium　or　smuggle　me　in　some　saws　or　something。'

〃'Yank；'　says　Doc　Millikin；　'I've　a　good　notion　to　help　you。　There's　only　one　government　in　the　world　that　can　get　you　out　of　this　difficulty；　and　that's　the　Confederate　States　of　America；　the　grandest　nation　that　ever　existed。'

〃Just　as　you　said　to　me　I　says　to　Doc；　'Why；　the　Confederacy　ain't　a　nation。　It's　been　absolved　forty　years　ago。'

〃'That's　a　campaign　lie；'　says　Doc。　'She's　running　along　as　solid　as　the　Roman　Empire。　She's　the　only　hope　you've　got。　Now；　you；　being　a　Yank；　have　got　to　go　through　with　some　preliminary　obsequies　before　you　can　get　official　aid。　You've　got　to　take　the　oath　of　allegiance　to　the　Confederate　Government。　Then　I'll　guarantee　she　does　all　she　can　for　you。　What　do　you　say；　Yank？it's　your　last　chance。'

〃'If　you're　fooling　with　me；　Doc；'　I　answers；　'you're　no　better　than　the　United　States。　But　as　you　say　it's　the　last　chance；　hurry　up　and　swear　me。　I　always　did　like　the　corn　whisky　and　'possum　anyhow。　I　believe　I'm　half　Southerner　by　nature。　I'm　willing　to　try　the　Klu…klux　in　place　of　the　khaki。　Get　brisk。'

〃Doc　Millikin　thinks　awhile；　and　then　he　offers　me　this　oath　of　allegiance　to　take　without　any　kind　of　a　chaser：

〃'I；　Barnard　O'Keefe；　Yank；　being　of　sound　body　but　a　Republican　mind；　hereby　swear　to　transfer　my　fealty；　respect；　and　allegiance　to　the　Confederate　States　of　America；　and　the　government　thereof　in　consideration　of　said　government；　through　its　official　acts　and　powers；　obtaining　my　freedom　and　release　from　confinement　and　sentence　of　death　brought　about　by　the　exuberance　of　my　Irish　proclivities　and　my　general　pizenness　as　a　Yank。'

〃I　repeated　these　words　after　Doc；　but　they　seemed　to　me　a　kind　of　hocus…pocus；　and　I　don't　believe　any　life…insurance　company　in　the　world　would　have　issued　me　a　policy　on　the　strength　of　'em。

〃Doc　went　away　saying　he　would　communicate　with　his　government　immediately。

〃Sayyou　can　imagine　how　I　feltme　to　be　shot　in　two　weeks　and　my　only　hope　for　help　being　in　a　government　that's　been　dead　so　long　that　it　isn't　even　remembered　except　on　Decoration　Day　and　when　Joe　Wheeler　signs　the　voucher　for　his　pay…check。　But　it　was　all　there　was　in　sight；　and　somehow　I　thought　Doc　Millikin　had　something　up　his　old　alpaca　sleeve　that　wasn't　all　foolishness。

〃Around　to　the　jail　comes　old　Doc　again　in　about　a　week。　I　was　flea…　bitten；　a　mite　sarcastic；　and　fundamentally　hungry。

〃'Any　Confederate　ironclads　in　the　offing？'　I　asks。　'Do　you　notice　any　sounds　resembling　the　approach　of　Jeb　Stewart's　cavalry　overland　or　Stonewall　Jackson　sneaking　up　in　the　rear？　If　you　do；　I　wish　you'd　say　so。'

〃'It's　too　soon　yet　for　help　to　come；'　says　Doc。

〃'The　sooner　the　better；'　says　I。　'I　don't　care　if　it　gets　in　fully　fifteen　minutes　before　I　am　shot；　and　if　you　happen　to　lay　eyes　on　Beauregard　or　Albert　Sidney　Johnston　or　any　of　the　relief　corps；　wig…　wag　'em　to　hike　along。'

〃'There's　been　no　answer　received　yet；'　says　Doc。

〃'Don't　forget；'　says　I；　'that　there's　only　four　days　more。　I　don't　know　how　you　propose　to　work　this　thing；　Doc；'　I　says　to　him；　'but　it　seems　to　me　I'd　sleep　better　if　you　h