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tone　bluff　on　the　creek　and　shoot　enough　lead　into　you　to　　ballast　a　submarine　air…ship。　　I'm　captain　of　this　company；　and　I've　　swore　allegiance　to　the　Amalgamated　States　regardless　of　sectional；　　secessional；　and　Congressional　differences。　　Have　you　got　any　smoking…　tobacco？'　winds　up　Sam。　　'Mine　got　wet　when　I　swum　the　creek　this　　morning。'

〃The　reason　I　drag　all　this　non　ex　parte　evidence　in　is　because　Willie　　Robbins　was　standing　there　listening　to　us。　　I　was　a　second　sergeant　　and　he　was　a　private　then；　but　among　us　Texans　and　Westerners　there　　never　was　as　much　tactics　and　subordination　as　there　was　in　the　　regular　army。　　We　never　called　our　captain　anything　but　'Sam'　except　　when　there　was　a　lot　of　major…generals　and　admirals　around；　so　as　to　　preserve　the　discipline。


〃And　says　Willie　Robbins　to　me；　in　a　sharp　construction　of　voice　much　　unbecoming　to　his　light　hair　and　previous　record：

〃'You　ought　to　be　shot；　Ben；　for　emitting　any　such　sentiments。　　A　man　　that　won't　fight　for　his　country　is　worse　than　a；　horse…thief。　　If　I　　was　the　cap；　I'd　put　you　in　the　guard…house　for　thirty　days　on　round　　steak　and　tamales。　　War；'　says　Willie；　'is　great　and　glorious。　　I　　didn't　know　you　were　a　coward。'

〃'I'm　not；'　says　I。　　'If　I　was；　I'd　knock　some　of　the　pallidness　off　　of　your　marble　brow。　　I'm　lenient　with　you；'　I　says；　'just　as　I　am　　with　the　Spaniards；　because　you　have　always　reminded　me　of　something　　with　mushrooms　on　the　side。　　Why；　you　little　Lady　of　Shalott；'　says　I；　　'you　underdone　leader　of　cotillions；　you　glassy　fashion　and　moulded　　form；　you　white…pine　soldier　made　in　the　Cisalpine　Alps　in　Germany　for　　the　late　New…Year　trade；　do　you　know　of　whom　you　are　talking　to？　　　We've　been　in　the　same　social　circle；'　says　I；　'and　I've　put　up　with　　you　because　you　seemed　so　meek　and　self…un…satisfying。　　I　don't　　understand　why　you　have　so　sudden　taken　a　personal　interest　in　　chivalrousness　and　murder。　　Your　nature's　undergone　a　complete　　revelation。　　Now；　how　is　it？'

〃'Well；　you　wouldn't　understand；　Ben；'　says　Willie；　giving　one　of　his　　refined　smiles　and　turning　away。

〃'Come　back　here！'　says　I；　catching　him　by　the　tail　of　his　khaki　coat。　　　'You've　made　me　kind　of　mad；　in　spite　of　the　aloofness　in　which　I　have　　heretofore　held　you。　　You　are　out　for　making　a　success　in　this　hero　　business；　and　I　believe　I　know　what　for。　　You　are　doing　it　either　　because　you　are　crazy　or　because　you　expect　to　catch　some　girl　by　it。　　　Now；　if　it's　a　girl；　I've　got　something　here　to　show　you。'

〃I　wouldn't　have　done　it；　but　I　was　plumb　mad。　　I　pulled　a　San　　Augustine　paper　out　of　my　hip…pocket；　and　showed　him　an　item。　　It　was　　a　half　a　column　about　the　marriage　of　Myra　Allison　and　Joe　Granberry。

〃Willie　laughed；　and　I　saw　I　hadn't　touched　him。

〃'Oh；'　says　he；　'everybody　knew　that　was　going　to　happen。　　I　heard　　about　that　a　week　ago。'　　And　then　he　gave　me　the　laugh　again。

〃'All　right；'　says　I。　　'Then　why　do　you　so　recklessly　chase　the　bright　　rainbow　of　fame？　Do　you　expect　to　be　elected　President；　or　do　you　　belong　to　a　suicide　club　？'

〃And　then　Captain　Sam　interferes。

〃'You　gentlemen　quit　jawing　and　go　back　to　your　quarters；'　says　he；　　'or　I'll　have　you　escorted　to　the　guard…house。　　Now；　scat；　both　of　　you！　　Before　you　go；　which　one　of　you　has　got　any　chewing…tobacco？'

〃'We're　off；　Sam；'　says　I。　　'It's　supper…time；　anyhow。　　But　what　do　　you　think　of　what　we　was　talking　about？　　I've　noticed　you　throwing　out　　a　good　many　grappling…hooks　for　this　here　balloon　called　fame　　　What's　ambition；　anyhow？　　What　does　a　man　risk　his　life　day　after　day　　for？　　Do　you　know　of　anything　he　gets　in　the　end　that　can　pay　him　for　　the　trouble？　　I　want　to　go　back　home；'　says　I。　　'I　don't　care　whether　　Cuba　sinks　or　swims；　and　I　don't　give　a　pipeful　of　rabbit　tobacco　　whether　Queen　Sophia　Christina　or　Charlie　Culberson　rules　these　fairy　　isles；　and　I　don't　want　my　name　on　any　list　except　the　list　of　　survivors。　　But　I've　noticed　you；　Sam；'　says　I；　'seeking　the　bubble　　notoriety　in　the　cannon's　larynx　a　number　of　times。　　Now；　what　do　you　　do　it　for？　　Is　it　ambition；　business；　or　some　freckle…faced　Pheebe　at　　home　that　you　are　heroing　for　？'

〃'Well；　Ben；'　says　Sam；　kind　of　hefting　his　sword　out　from　between　his　　knees；　'as　your　superior　officer　I　could　court…martial　you　for　　attempted　cowardice　and　desertion。　　But　I　won't。　　And　I'll　tell　you　　why　I'm　trying　for　promotion　and　the　usual　honors　of　war　and　conquest。　　　A　major　gets　more　pay　than　a　captain；　and　I　need　the　money。'

〃'Correct　for　you！'　says　I。　　'I　can　understand　that。　　Your　system　of　　fame…seeking　is　rooted　in　the　deepest　soil　of　patriotism。　　But　I　can't　　comprehend；'　says　I；　'why　Willie　Robbins；　whose　folks　at　home　are　well　　off；　and　who　used　to　be　as　meek　and　undesirous　of　notice　as　a　cat　with　　cream　on　his　whiskers；　should　all　at　once　develop　into　a　warrior　bold　　with　the　most　fire…eating　kind　of　proclivities。　　And　the　girl　in　his　　case　seems　to　have　been　eliminated　by　marriage　to　another　fellow。　　I　　reckon；'　says　I；　'it's　a　plain　case　of　just　common　ambition。　　He　wants　　his　name；　maybe；　to　go　thundering　down　the　coroners　of　time。　　It　must　　be　that。'

〃Well；　without　itemizing　his　deeds；　Willie　sure　made　good　as　a　hero。　　　He　simply　spent　most　of　his　time　on　his　knees　begging　our　captain　to　　send　him　on　forlorn　hopes　and　dangerous　scouting　expeditions。　　In　　every　fight　he　was　the　first　man　to　mix　it　at　close　quarters　with　the　　Don　Alfonsos。　　He　got　three　or　four　bullets　planted　in　various　parts　　of　his　autonomy。　　Once　he　went　off　with　a　detail　of　eight　men　and　　captured　a　whole　company　of　Spanish。　　He　kept　Captain　Floyd　busy　　writing　out　recommendations　of　his　bravery　to　send　in　to　head…　quarters；　and　he　began　to　accumulate　medals　for　all　kinds　of　things…　heroism　and　target…shooting　and　valor　and　tactics　and　　uninsubordination；　and　all　the　little　accomplishments　that　look　good　　to　the　third　assistant　secretaries　of　the　War　Department。

〃Finally；　Cap　Floyd　got　promoted　to　be　a　major…general；　or　a　knight　　commander　of　the　main　herd；　or　something　like　that。　　He　pounded　around　　on　a　white　horse；　all　desecrated　up　with　gold…leaf　and　hen…feathers　　and　a　Good　Templar's　hat；　and　wasn't　allowed　by　the　regulations　to　　speak　to　us。　　And　Willie　Robbins　was　made　captain　of　our　company。

〃And　maybe　he　didn't　go　after　the　wreath　of　fame　then！　　As　far　as　I　　could　see　it　was　him　that　ended　the　war。　　He　got　eighteen　of　us　boys　friends　of　his；　tookilled　in　battles　that　he　stirred　up　himself；　and　　that　didn't　seem　to　me　necessary　at　all。　　One　night　he　took　twelve　of　　us　and　waded　through　a　little　nil　about　a　hundred　and　ninety　yards　　wide；　and　climbed　a　couple　of　mountains；　and　sneaked　through　a　mile　of　　neglected　shrubbery　and　a　couple　of　rock…quarries　and　into　a　rye…straw　　village；　and　captured　a　Spanish　general　named；　as　they　said；　Benny　　Veedus。　　Benny　seemed　to　me　hardly　worth　the　trouble；　being　a　blackish　　man　without　shoes　or　cuffs；　and　anxious　to　surrender　and　throw　himself　　on　the　commissary　of　his　foe。

〃But　that　job　gave　Willie　the　big　boost　he　wanted。　　The　San　Augustine　　News　and　the　Galveston；　St。　　Louis；　New　York；　and　Kansas　City　papers　　printed　his　picture　and　columns　of　stuff　about　him。　　Old　San　Augustine　　simply　went　crazy　over　its　'gallant　son。'　　The　News　had　an　editorial　　tearfully　begging　the　Government　to　call　off　the　regular　army　and　the　　national　guard；　and　let　Willie　carry　on　the　rest　of　the　war　single…　handed。　　It　said　that　a　refusal　to　do　so　would　be　regarded　as　a　proof　　that　the　Northern　jealousy　of　the　South　was　still　as　rampant　as　ever。

〃If　the　war　hadn't　ended　pretty　soon；　I　don't　know　to　what　heights　of　　gold　braid　and　encomiums　Willie　would　have　climbed；　but　it　did。　　There　　was　a　secession　of　hostilities　just　three　days　after　he　was　appointed　　a　colonel；　and　got　in　three　more　medals　by　registered　mail；　and　shot　　two　Spaniards　while　they　were　drinking　lemonade　in　an　ambuscade。

〃Our　company　went　back　to　San　Augustine　when　the　war　was　over。　　There　　wasn't　anywhere　else　for　it　to　go。　　And　what　do　you　think？　　The　old　　town　notified　us　in　print；　by　wire　cable；　special　delivery；　and　a　　nigger　named　Saul　sent　on　a　gray　mule　to　San　Antone；　that　they　was　　going　to　give　us　the　biggest　blow…out；　complimentary；　alimentary；　and　　elementary；　that　ever　disturbed　the　kildees　on　the　sand…flats　outside　　of　the　immediate　contiguity　of　the　city。

〃I　say　'we；'　but　it　was　all　meant　for　ex…Private；　Captain　de　facto；　　and　Colonel…elect　Willie　Robbins。　　The　town　was　crazy　about　him。　　They　　notified　us　that　the　reception　they　were　going　to　put　up　would　make　　the　Mardi　Gras　in　New　Orleans　look　like　an　afternoon　tea　in　Bury　St。　　　Edmunds　with　a　curate's　aunt。

〃Well；　the　San　Augustine　Rifles　got　back　home　on　schedule　time。　　　Everybody　was　at　the　depot　giving　forth　Roosevelt…Democratthey　used　　to　be　called　Rebelyells。　　There　was　two　brass…bands；　and　the　mayor；　　and　schoolgirls　in　white　frightening　the　street…car　horses　by　throwing　　Cherokee　roses　in　the　streets；　and…well；　maybe　you've　seen　a　　celebration　by　a　town　that　was　inland　and　out　of　water。

〃They　wanted　Brevet…Colonel　Willie　to　get　into　a　carriage　and　be　drawn　　by　prominent　citizens　and　some　of　the　city　aldermen　to　the　armo