albert savarus-第17节

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mortified　herself　by　remaining　on　her　knees；　her　arms　outstretched　for
hours；　and　repeating　prayers　all　the　time。　She　had　compelled　Mariette
to　similar　sets　of　repentance；　her　passion　was　mingled　with　genuine
asceticism；　and　was　all　the　more　dangerous。

〃Shall　I　read　that　letter；　shall　I　not？〃　she　asked　herself；　while
listening　to　the　Chavoncourt　girls。　One　was　sixteen；　the　other
seventeen　and　a　half。　Rosalie　looked　upon　her　two　friends　as　mere
children　because　they　were　not　secretly　in　love。〃If　I　read　it；〃　she
finally　decided；　after　hesitating　for　an　hour　between　Yes　and　No；　〃it
shall；　at　any　rate；　be　the　last。　Since　I　have　gone　so　far　as　to　see
what　he　wrote　to　his　friend；　why　should　I　not　know　what　he　says　to
/her/？　If　it　is　a　horrible　crime；　is　it　not　a　proof　of　love？　Oh；
Albert！　am　I　not　your　wife？〃

When　Rosalie　was　in　bed　she　opened　the　letter；　dated　from　day　to　day；
so　as　to　give　the　Duchess　a　faithful　picture　of　Albert's　life　and
feelings。

〃25th。

　　〃My　dear　Soul；　all　is　well。　To　my　other　conquests　I　have　just
　　added　an　invaluable　one：　I　have　done　a　service　to　one　of　the　most
　　influential　men　who　work　the　elections。　Like　the　critics；　who　make
　　other　men's　reputations　but　can　never　make　their　own；　he　makes
　　deputies　though　he　never　can　become　one。　The　worthy　man　wanted　to
　　show　his　gratitude　without　loosening　his　purse…strings　by　saying
　　to　me；　'Would　you　care　to　sit　in　the　Chamber？　I　can　get　you
　　returned　as　deputy。'

　　〃　'If　I　ever　make　up　my　mind　to　enter　on　a　political　career；'
　　replied　I　hypocritically；　'it　would　be　to　devote　myself　to　the
　　Comte；　which　I　love；　and　where　I　am　appreciated。'

　　〃　'Well；'　he　said；　'we　will　persuade　you；　and　through　you　we　shall
　　have　weight　in　the　Chamber；　for　you　will　distinguish　yourself
　　there。'

　　〃And　so；　my　beloved　angel；　say　what　you　will；　my　perseverance　will
　　be　rewarded。　Ere　long　I　shall；　from　the　high　place　of　the　French
　　Tribune；　come　before　my　country；　before　Europe。　My　name　will　be
　　flung　to　you　by　the　hundred　voices　of　the　French　press。

　　〃Yes；　as　you　tell　me；　I　was　old　when　I　came　to　Besancon；　and
　　Besancon　has　aged　me　more；　but；　like　Sixtus　V。；　I　shall　be　young
　　again　the　day　after　my　election。　I　shall　enter　on　my　true　life；　my
　　own　sphere。　Shall　we　not　then　stand　in　the　same　line？　Count
　　Savaron　de　Savarus；　Ambassador　I　know　not　where；　may　surely　marry
　　a　Princess　Soderini；　the　widow　of　the　Duc　d'Argaiolo！　Triumph
　　restores　the　youth　of　men　who　have　been　preserved　by　incessant
　　struggles。　Oh；　my　Life！　with　what　gladness　did　I　fly　from　my
　　library　to　my　private　room；　to　tell　your　portrait　of　this　progress
　　before　writing　to　you！　Yes；　the　votes　I　can　command；　those　of　the
　　Vicar…General；　of　the　persons　I　can　oblige；　and　of　this　client；
　　make　my　election　already　sure。


〃26th。

　　〃We　have　entered　on　the　twelfth　year　since　that　blest　evening
　　when；　by　a　look；　the　beautiful　Duchess　sealed　the　promises　made　by
　　the　exile　Francesca。　You；　dear；　are　thirty…two；　I　am　thirty…five；
　　the　dear　Duke　is　seventy…seventhat　is　to　say；　ten　years　more
　　than　yours　and　mine　put　together；　and　he　still　keeps　well！　My
　　patience　is　almost　as　great　as　my　love；　and　indeed　I　need　a　few
　　years　yet　to　rise　to　the　level　of　your　name。　As　you　see；　I　am　in
　　good　spirits　to…day；　I　can　laugh；　that　is　the　effect　of　hope。
　　Sadness　or　gladness；　it　all　comes　to　me　through　you。　The　hope　of
　　success　always　carries　me　back　to　the　day　following　that　one　on
　　which　I　saw　you　for　the　first　time；　when　my　life　became　one　with
　　yours　as　the　earth　turns　to　the　light。　/Qual　pianto/　are　these
　　eleven　years；　for　this　is　the　26th　of　December；　the　anniversary　of
　　my　arrival　at　your　villa　on　the　Lake　of　Geneva。　For　eleven　years
　　have　I　been　crying　to　you；　while　you　shine　like　a　star　set　too
　　high　for　man　to　reach　it。


〃27th。

　　〃No；　dearest；　do　not　go　to　Milan；　stay　at　Belgirate。　Milan
　　terrifies　me。　I　do　not　like　that　odious　Milanese　fashion　of
　　chatting　at　the　Scala　every　evening　with　a　dozen　persons；　among
　　whom　it　is　hard　if　no　one　says　something　sweet。　To　me　solitude　is
　　like　the　lump　of　amber　in　whose　heart　an　insect　lives　for　ever　in
　　unchanging　beauty。　Thus　the　heart　and　soul　of　a　woman　remains　pure
　　and　unaltered　in　the　form　of　their　first　youth。　Is　it　the
　　/Tedeschi/　that　you　regret？


〃28th。

　　〃Is　your　statue　never　to　be　finished？　I　should　wish　to　have　you　in
　　marble；　in　painting；　in　miniature；　in　every　possible　form；　to
　　beguile　my　impatience。　I　still　am　waiting　for　the　view　of
　　Belgirate　from　the　south；　and　that　of　the　balcony；　these　are　all
　　that　I　now　lack。　I　am　so　extremely　busy　that　to…day　I　can　only
　　write　you　nothingbut　that　nothing　is　everything。　Was　it　not　of
　　nothing　that　God　made　the　world？　That　nothing　is　a　word；　God's
　　word：　I　love　you！


〃30th。

　　〃Ah！　I　have　received　your　journal。　Thanks　for　your　punctuality。
　　So　you　found　great　pleasure　in　seeing　all　the　details　of　our　first
　　acquaintance　thus　set　down？　Alas！　even　while　disguising　them　I　was
　　sorely　afraid　of　offending　you。　We　had　no　stories；　and　a　/Review/
　　without　stories　is　a　beauty　without　hair。　Not　being　inventive　by
　　nature；　and　in　sheer　despair；　I　took　the　only　poetry　in　my　soul；
　　the　only　adventure　in　my　memory；　and　pitched　it　in　the　key　in
　　which　it　would　bear　telling；　nor　did　I　ever　cease　to　think　of　you
　　while　writing　the　only　literary　production　that　will　ever　come
　　from　my　heart；　I　cannot　say　from　my　pen。　Did　not　the
　　transformation　of　your　fierce　Sormano　into　Gina　make　you　laugh？

　　〃You　ask　after　my　health。　Well；　it　is　better　than　in　Paris。　Though
　　I　work　enormously；　the　peacefulness　of　the　surroundings　has　its
　　effect　on　the　mind。　What　really　tries　and　ages　me；　dear　angel；　is
　　the　anguish　of　mortified　vanity；　the　perpetual　friction　of　Paris
　　life；　the　struggle　of　rival　ambitions。　This　peace　is　a　balm。

　　〃If　you　could　imagine　the　pleasure　your　letter　gives　me！the
　　long；　kind　letter　in　which　you　tell　me　the　most　trivial　incidents
　　of　your　life。　No！　you　women　can　never　know　to　what　a　degree　a　true
　　lover　is　interested　in　these　trifles。　It　was　an　immense　pleasure
　　to　see　the　pattern　of　your　new　dress。　Can　it　be　a　matter　of
　　indifference　to　me　to　know　what　you　wear？　If　your　lofty　brow　is
　　knit？　If　our　writers　amuse　you？　If　Canalis'　songs　delight　you？　I
　　read　the　books　you　read。　Even　to　your　boating　on　the　lake　every
　　incident　touched　me。　Your　letter　is　as　lovely；　as　sweet　as　your
　　soul！　Oh！　flower　of　heaven；　perpetually　adored；　could　I　have　lived
　　without　those　dear　letters；　which　for　eleven　years　have　upheld　me
　　in　my　difficult　path　like　a　light；　like　a　perfume；　like　a　steady
　　chant；　like　some　divine　nourishment；　like　everything　which　can
　　soothe　and　comfort　life。

　　〃Do　not　fail　me！　If　you　knew　what　anxiety　I　suffer　the　day　before
　　they　are　due；　or　the　pain　a　day's　delay　can　give　me！　Is　she　ill？
　　Is　/he/？　I　am　midway　between　hell　and　paradise。

　　〃/O　mia　cara　diva/；　keep　up　your　music；　exercise　your　voice；
　　practise。　I　am　enchanted　with　the　coincidence　of　employments　and
　　hours　by　which；　though　separated　by　the　Alps；　we　live　by　precisely
　　the　same　rule。　The　thought　charms　me　and　gives　me　courage。　The
　　first　time　I　undertook　to　plead　hereI　forget　to　tell　you　thisI
　　fancied　that　you　were　listening　to　me；　and　I　suddenly　felt　the
　　flash　of　inspiration　which　lifts　the　poet　above　mankind。　If　I　am
　　returned　to　the　Chamberoh！　you　must　come　to　Paris　to　be　present
　　at　my　first　appearance　there！


〃30th；　Evening。

　　〃Good　heavens；　how　I　love　you！　Alas！　I　have　intrusted　too　much　to
　　my　love　and　my　hopes。　An　accident　which　should　sink　that
　　overloaded　bark　would　end　my　life。　For　three　years　now　I　have　not
　　seen　you；　and　at　the　thought　of　going　to　Belgirate　my　heart　beats
　　so　wildly　that　I　am　forced　to　stop。To　see　you；　to　hear　that
　　girlish　caressing　voice！　To　embrace　in　my　gaze　that　ivory　skin；
　　glistening　under　the　candlelight；　and　through　which　I　can　read
　　your　noble　mind！　To　admire　your　fingers　playing　on　the　keys；　to
　　drink　in　your　whole　soul　in　a　look；　in　the　tone　of　an　/Oime/　or　an
　　/Alberto/！　To　walk　by　the　blossoming　orange…trees；　to　live　a　few
　　months　in　the　bosom　of　that　glorious　scenery！That　is　life。　What
　　folly　it　is　to　run　after　power；　a　name；　fortune！　But　at　Belgirate
　　there　is　everything；　there　is　poetry；　there　is　glory！　I　ought　to
　　have　made　myself　your　steward；　or；　as　that　dear　tyrant　whom　we
　　cannot　hate　proposed　to　me；　live　there　as　/cavaliere　servente/；
　　only　our　passion　was　too　fierce　to　allow　of　it。

　　〃Farewell；　my　angel；　forgive　me　my　next　fit　of　sadness　in
　　consideration　of　this　cheerful　mood；　it　has　come　as　a　beam　of
　　light　from　the　torch　of　Hope；　which　has　hitherto　seemed　to　me　a
　　Will…o'…the…wisp。〃

〃How　he　loves　her！〃　cried　Rosalie；　dropping　the　letter；　which　seemed
heavy　in　her　hand。　〃After　eleven　years　to　write　like　this！〃

〃Mariette；〃　said　Mademoiselle　de　Watteville　to　her　maid　next　morning；
〃go　and　post　this　letter。　Tell　Jerome　that　I　know　all　I　wish　to　know；
and　that　he　is　to　serve　Monsieur　Albert　faithfully。　We　will　confess
our　sins；