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Western¡¡city¡¡of¡¡Chandler¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡horses¡¡of¡¡pursuers¡¡and

pursued¡¡were¡¡starved¡¡and¡¡weary¡£¡¡¡¡There¡¡was¡¡one¡¡hotel

that¡¡offered¡¡danger¡¡to¡¡man¡¡and¡¡entertainment¡¡to¡¡beast£»

so¡¡the¡¡four¡¡of¡¡us¡¡met¡¡again¡¡in¡¡the¡¡dining¡¡room¡¡at¡¡the

ringing¡¡of¡¡a¡¡bell¡¡so¡¡resonant¡¡and¡¡large¡¡that¡¡it¡¡had¡¡cracked

the¡¡welkin¡¡long¡¡ago¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡dining¡¡room¡¡was¡¡not¡¡as¡¡large

as¡¡the¡¡one¡¡at¡¡Guthrie¡£



Just¡¡as¡¡we¡¡were¡¡eating¡¡apple¡¡pie¡¡¡¡how¡¡Ben¡¡Davises

and¡¡tragedy¡¡impinge¡¡upon¡¡each¡¡other£¡¡¡¡¡¡¡I¡¡noticed¡¡Sam

looking¡¡with¡¡keen¡¡intentness¡¡at¡¡our¡¡quarry¡¡where¡¡they

were¡¡seated¡¡at¡¡a¡¡table¡¡across¡¡the¡¡room¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡girl¡¡still

wore¡¡the¡¡brown¡¡dress¡¡with¡¡lace¡¡collar¡¡and¡¡cuffs£»¡¡and¡¡the

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plate£»¡¡with¡¡his¡¡close¡¡cropped¡¡head¡¡held¡¡low¡£



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himself£»¡¡¡¨that¡¡won't¡¡let¡¡you¡¡shoot¡¡a¡¡man¡¡in¡¡the¡¡company

of¡¡a¡¡woman£»¡¡but£»¡¡by¡¡thunder£»¡¡there¡¡ain't¡¡one¡¡to¡¡keep¡¡you

from¡¡killing¡¡a¡¡woman¡¡in¡¡the¡¡company¡¡of¡¡a¡¡man£¡¡¨



And£»¡¡quicker¡¡than¡¡my¡¡mind¡¡could¡¡follow¡¡his¡¡argument£»

he¡¡whipped¡¡a¡¡Colt's¡¡automatic¡¡from¡¡under¡¡his¡¡left¡¡arm

and¡¡pumped¡¡six¡¡bullets¡¡into¡¡the¡¡body¡¡that¡¡the¡¡brown

dress¡¡covered¡¡¡¡the¡¡brown¡¡dress¡¡with¡¡the¡¡lace¡¡collar¡¡and

cuffs¡¡and¡¡the¡¡accordion¡­plaited¡¡skirt¡£



The¡¡young¡¡person¡¡in¡¡the¡¡dark¡¡sack¡¡suit£»¡¡from¡¡whose

head¡¡and¡¡from¡¡whose¡¡life¡¡a¡¡woman's¡¡glory¡¡had¡¡been

clipped£»¡¡laid¡¡her¡¡head¡¡on¡¡her¡¡arms¡¡stretched¡¡upon¡¡the

table£»¡¡while¡¡people¡¡came¡¡running¡¡to¡¡raise¡¡Ben¡¡Tatum

from¡¡the¡¡floor¡¡in¡¡his¡¡feminine¡¡masquerade¡¡that¡¡had¡¡given

Sam¡¡the¡¡opportunity¡¡to¡¡set¡¡aside£»¡¡technically£»¡¡the¡¡obliga¡­

tions¡¡of¡¡the¡¡code¡£







¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡SUITE¡¡HOMES¡¡AND¡¡THEIR¡¡ROMANCE



FEW¡¡young¡¡couples¡¡in¡¡the¡¡Big¡­City¡­of¡­Bluff¡¡began

their¡¡married¡¡existence¡¡with¡¡greater¡¡promise¡¡of¡¡happiness

than¡¡did¡¡Mr¡£¡¡and¡¡Mrs¡£¡¡Claude¡¡Turpin¡£¡¡¡¡They¡¡felt¡¡no

especial¡¡animosity¡¡toward¡¡each¡¡other£»¡¡they¡¡were¡¡comfort¡­

ably¡¡established¡¡in¡¡a¡¡handsome¡¡apartment¡¡house¡¡that

had¡¡a¡¡name¡¡and¡¡accommodations¡¡like¡¡those¡¡of¡¡a¡¡sleeping¡­

car£»¡¡they¡¡were¡¡living¡¡as¡¡expensively¡¡as¡¡the¡¡couple¡¡on

the¡¡next¡¡floor¡¡above¡¡who¡¡had¡¡twice¡¡their¡¡income£»

and¡¡their¡¡marriage¡¡had¡¡occurred¡¡on¡¡a¡¡wager£»¡¡a¡¡ferry¡­

boat¡¡and¡¡first¡¡acquaintance£»¡¡thus¡¡securing¡¡a

sensational¡¡newspaper¡¡notice¡¡with¡¡their¡¡names¡¡attached

to¡¡pictures¡¡of¡¡the¡¡Queen¡¡of¡¡Roumania¡¡and¡¡M¡£¡¡Santos¡­

Dumont¡£



Turpin's¡¡income¡¡was¡¡200¡¡per¡¡month¡£¡¡¡¡On¡¡pay¡¡day£»

after¡¡calculating¡¡the¡¡amounts¡¡due¡¡for¡¡rent£»¡¡instalments

on¡¡furniture¡¡and¡¡piano£»¡¡gas£»¡¡and¡¡bills¡¡owed¡¡to¡¡the¡¡florist£»

confectioner£»¡¡milliner£»¡¡tailor£»¡¡wine¡¡merchant¡¡and¡¡cab

company£»¡¡the¡¡Turpins¡¡would¡¡find¡¡that¡¡they¡¡still¡¡had¡¡200

left¡¡to¡¡spend¡£¡¡¡¡How¡¡to¡¡do¡¡this¡¡is¡¡one¡¡of¡¡the¡¡secrets¡¡of

metropolitan¡¡life¡£



The¡¡domestic¡¡life¡¡of¡¡the¡¡Turpins¡¡was¡¡a¡¡beautiful¡¡picture

to¡¡see¡£¡¡¡¡But¡¡you¡¡couldn't¡¡gaze¡¡upon¡¡it¡¡as¡¡you¡¡could

at¡¡an¡¡oleograph¡¡of¡¡¡¨Don't¡¡Wake¡¡Grandma£»¡¨¡¡or¡¡¡¨Brook¡­

lyn¡¡by¡¡Moonlight¡£¡¨



You¡¡had¡¡to¡¡blink¡¡when¡¡looked¡¡at¡¡it£»¡¡and¡¡you¡¡heard

a¡¡fizzing¡¡sound¡¡just¡¡like¡¡the¡¡machine¡¡with¡¡a¡¡¡¨scope¡¨¡¡at

the¡¡end¡¡of¡¡it¡£¡¡¡¡Yes£»¡¡there¡¡wasn't¡¡much¡¡repose¡¡about¡¡the

picture¡¡of¡¡the¡¡Turpins'¡¡domestic¡¡life¡£¡¡¡¡It¡¡was¡¡something

like¡¡¡¨Spearing¡¡Salmon¡¡in¡¡the¡¡Columbia¡¡River£»¡¨¡¡or¡¡¡¨Jap¡­

anese¡¡Artillery¡¡in¡¡Action¡£¡¨



Every¡¡day¡¡was¡¡just¡¡like¡¡another£»¡¡as¡¡the¡¡days¡¡are¡¡in

New¡¡York¡£¡¡¡¡In¡¡the¡¡morning¡¡Turpin¡¡would¡¡take¡¡bromo¡­

seltzer£»¡¡his¡¡pocket¡¡change¡¡from¡¡under¡¡the¡¡clock£»¡¡his¡¡hat£»

no¡¡breakfast¡¡and¡¡his¡¡departure¡¡for¡¡the¡¡office¡£¡¡¡¡At¡¡noon

Mrs¡£¡¡Turpin¡¡would¡¡get¡¡out¡¡of¡¡bed¡¡and¡¡humour£»¡¡put¡¡on

a¡¡kimono£»¡¡airs£»¡¡and¡¡the¡¡water¡¡to¡¡boil¡¡for¡¡coffee¡£



Turpin¡¡lunched¡¡downtown¡£¡¡¡¡He¡¡came¡¡home¡¡at¡¡6

to¡¡dress¡¡for¡¡dinner¡£¡¡¡¡They¡¡always¡¡dined¡¡out¡£¡¡¡¡They

strayed¡¡from¡¡the¡¡chop¡­house¡¡to¡¡chop¡­sueydom£»¡¡from

terrace¡¡to¡¡table¡¡d'hôte£»¡¡from¡¡rathskeller¡¡to¡¡roadhouse£»

from¡¡caf£¿to¡¡casino£»¡¡from¡¡Maria's¡¡to¡¡the¡¡Martha¡¡Wash¡­

ington¡£¡¡¡¡Such¡¡is¡¡domestic¡¡life¡¡in¡¡the¡¡great¡¡city¡£¡¡¡¡Your

vine¡¡is¡¡the¡¡mistletoe£»¡¡your¡¡fig¡¡tree¡¡bears¡¡dates¡£¡¡¡¡Your

household¡¡gods¡¡are¡¡Mercury¡¡and¡¡John¡¡Howard¡¡Payne¡£

For¡¡the¡¡wedding¡¡march¡¡you¡¡now¡¡hear¡¡only¡¡¡¨Come¡¡with

the¡¡Gypsy¡¡Bride¡£¡¨¡¡¡¡You¡¡rarely¡¡dine¡¡at¡¡the¡¡same¡¡place

twice¡¡in¡¡succession¡£¡¡¡¡You¡¡tire¡¡of¡¡the¡¡food£»¡¡and£»¡¡besides£»

you¡¡want¡¡to¡¡give¡¡them¡¡time¡¡for¡¡the¡¡question¡¡of¡¡that¡¡souve¡­

nir¡¡silver¡¡sugar¡¡bowl¡¡to¡¡blow¡¡over¡£



The¡¡Turpins¡¡were¡¡therefore¡¡happy¡£¡¡¡¡They¡¡made¡¡many

warm¡¡and¡¡delightful¡¡friends£»¡¡some¡¡of¡¡whom¡¡they¡¡remem¡­

bered¡¡the¡¡next¡¡day¡£¡¡¡¡Their¡¡home¡¡life¡¡was¡¡an¡¡ideal¡¡one£»

according¡¡to¡¡the¡¡rules¡¡and¡¡regulations¡¡of¡¡the¡¡Book¡¡of¡¡Bluff¡£



There¡¡came¡¡a¡¡time¡¡when¡¡it¡¡dawned¡¡upon¡¡Turpin

that¡¡his¡¡wife¡¡was¡¡getting¡¡away¡¡with¡¡too¡¡much¡¡money¡£

If¡¡you¡¡belong¡¡to¡¡the¡¡near¡­swell¡¡class¡¡in¡¡the¡¡Big¡¡City£»

and¡¡your¡¡income¡¡is¡¡200¡¡per¡¡month£»¡¡and¡¡you¡¡find¡¡at¡¡the

end¡¡of¡¡the¡¡month£»¡¡after¡¡looking¡¡over¡¡the¡¡bills¡¡for¡¡current

expenses£»¡¡that¡¡you£»¡¡yourself£»¡¡have¡¡spent¡¡150£»¡¡you¡¡very

naturally¡¡wonder¡¡what¡¡has¡¡become¡¡of¡¡the¡¡other¡¡50¡£

So¡¡you¡¡suspect¡¡your¡¡wife¡£¡¡¡¡And¡¡perhaps¡¡you¡¡give¡¡her

a¡¡hint¡¡that¡¡something¡¡needs¡¡explanation¡£



¡¨I¡¡say£»¡¡Vivien£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡Turpin£»¡¡one¡¡afternoon¡¡when¡¡they

were¡¡enjoying¡¡in¡¡rapt¡¡silence¡¡the¡¡peace¡¡and¡¡quiet¡¡of¡¡their

cozy¡¡apartment£»¡¡¡¨you've¡¡been¡¡creating¡¡a¡¡hiatus¡¡big

enough¡¡for¡¡a¡¡dog¡¡to¡¡crawl¡¡through¡¡in¡¡this¡¡month's¡¡hon¡­

orarium¡£¡¡¡¡You¡¡haven't¡¡been¡¡paying¡¡your¡¡dressmaker

anything¡¡on¡¡account£»¡¡have¡¡you£¿¡¨



There¡¡was¡¡a¡¡moment's¡¡silence¡£¡¡¡¡No¡¡sounds¡¡could¡¡be

heard¡¡except¡¡the¡¡breathing¡¡of¡¡the¡¡fox¡¡terrier£»¡¡and¡¡the

subdued£»¡¡monotonous¡¡sizzling¡¡of¡¡Vivien's¡¡fulvous¡¡locks

against¡¡the¡¡insensate¡¡curling¡¡irons¡£¡¡¡¡Claude¡¡Turpin£»

sitting¡¡upon¡¡a¡¡pillow¡¡that¡¡he¡¡had¡¡thoughtfully¡¡placed

upon¡¡the¡¡convolutions¡¡of¡¡the¡¡apartment¡¡sofa£»¡¡narrowly

watched¡¡the¡¡riante£»¡¡lovely¡¡face¡¡of¡¡his¡¡wife¡£



¡¨Claudie£»¡¡dear£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡she£»¡¡touching¡¡her¡¡finger¡¡to¡¡her

ruby¡¡tongue¡¡and¡¡testing¡¡the¡¡unresponsive¡¡curling¡¡irons£»

¡¨you¡¡do¡¡me¡¡an¡¡injustice¡£¡¡¡¡Mme¡£¡¡Toinette¡¡has¡¡not¡¡seen¡¡a

cent¡¡of¡¡mine¡¡since¡¡the¡¡day¡¡you¡¡paid¡¡your¡¡tailor¡¡ten¡¡dollars

on¡¡account¡£¡¨



Turpin's¡¡suspicions¡¡were¡¡allayed¡¡for¡¡the¡¡time¡£¡¡¡¡But

one¡¡day¡¡soon¡¡there¡¡came¡¡an¡¡anonymous¡¡letter¡¡to¡¡him

that¡¡read£º



¡¨Watch¡¡your¡¡wife¡£¡¡¡¡She¡¡is¡¡blowing¡¡in¡¡your¡¡money

secretly¡£¡¡¡¡I¡¡was¡¡a¡¡sufferer¡¡just¡¡as¡¡you¡¡are¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡place

is¡¡No¡£¡¡345¡¡Blank¡¡Street¡£¡¡¡¡A¡¡word¡¡to¡¡the¡¡wise£»¡¡etc¡£

¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¨A¡¡MAN¡¡WHO¡¡KNOWS¡¨



Turpin¡¡took¡¡this¡¡letter¡¡to¡¡the¡¡captain¡¡of¡¡police¡¡of

the¡¡precinct¡¡that¡¡he¡¡lived¡¡in¡£



¡¨My¡¡precinct¡¡is¡¡as¡¡clean¡¡as¡¡a¡¡hound's¡¡tooth£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡the

captain¡£¡¡¡¡¡¨The¡¡lid's¡¡shut¡¡down¡¡as¡¡close¡¡there¡¡as¡¡it¡¡is

over¡¡the¡¡eye¡¡of¡¡a¡¡Williamsburg¡¡girl¡¡when¡¡she's¡¡kissed¡¡at

a¡¡party¡£¡¡¡¡But¡¡if¡¡you¡¡think¡¡there's¡¡anything¡¡queer¡¡at¡¡the

address£»¡¡I'll¡¡go¡¡there¡¡with¡¡ye¡£¡¨



On¡¡the¡¡next¡¡afternoon¡¡at¡¡3£»¡¡Turpin¡¡and¡¡the¡¡captain

crept¡¡softly¡¡up¡¡the¡¡stairs¡¡of¡¡No¡£¡¡345¡¡Blank¡¡Street¡£¡¡¡¡A

dozen¡¡plain¡­clothes¡¡men£»¡¡dressed¡¡in¡¡full¡¡police¡¡uniforms£»

so¡¡as¡¡to¡¡allay¡¡suspicion£»¡¡waited¡¡in¡¡the¡¡hall¡¡below¡£



At¡¡the¡¡top¡¡of¡¡the¡¡stairs¡¡was¡¡a¡¡door£»¡¡which¡¡was¡¡found

to¡¡be¡¡locked¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡captain¡¡took¡¡a¡¡key¡¡from¡¡his¡¡pocket

and¡¡unlocked¡¡it¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡two¡¡men¡¡entered¡£



They¡¡found¡¡themselves¡¡in¡¡a¡¡large¡¡room£»¡¡occupied

by¡¡twenty¡¡or¡¡twenty¡­five¡¡elegantly¡¡clothed¡¡ladies¡£¡¡¡¡Racing

charts¡¡hung¡¡against¡¡the¡¡walls£»¡¡a¡¡ticker¡¡clicked¡¡in¡¡one

corner£»¡¡with¡¡a¡¡telephone¡¡receiver¡¡to¡¡his¡¡ear¡¡a¡¡man¡¡was

calling¡¡out¡¡the¡¡various¡¡positions¡¡of¡¡the¡¡horses¡¡in¡¡a¡¡very

exciting¡¡race¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡occupants¡¡of¡¡the¡¡room¡¡looked¡¡up¡¡at

the¡¡intruders£»¡¡but£»¡¡as¡¡if¡¡reassured¡¡by¡¡the¡¡sight¡¡of¡¡the

captain's¡¡uniform£»¡¡they¡¡reverted¡¡their¡¡attention¡¡to¡¡the

man¡¡at¡¡the¡¡telephone¡£



¡¨You¡¡see£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡the¡¡captain¡¡to¡¡Turpin£»¡¡¡¨the¡¡value¡¡of

an¡¡anonymous¡¡letter£¡¡¡¡¡No¡¡high¡­minded¡¡and¡¡self¡­respect¡­

ing¡¡gentleman¡¡should¡¡consider¡¡one¡¡worthy¡¡of¡¡notice¡£

Is¡¡your¡¡wife¡¡among¡¡this¡¡assembly£»¡¡Mr¡£¡¡Turpin£¿¡¨



¡¨She¡¡is¡¡not£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡Turpin¡£



¡¨And¡¡if¡¡she¡¡was£»¡¨¡¡continued¡¡the¡¡captain£»¡¡¡¨would¡¡she

be¡¡within¡¡the¡¡reach¡¡of¡¡the¡¡tongue¡¡of¡¡slander£¿¡¡¡¡These

ladies¡¡constitute¡¡a¡¡Browning¡¡Society¡£¡¡¡¡They¡¡meet¡¡to

discuss¡¡the¡¡meaning¡¡of¡¡the¡¡great¡¡poet¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡telephone

is¡¡connected¡¡with¡¡Boston£»¡¡whence¡¡the¡¡parent¡¡society

transmits¡¡frequently¡¡its¡¡interpretations¡¡of¡¡the¡¡poems¡£¡¡¡¡Be

ashamed¡¡of¡¡yer¡¡suspicions£»¡¡Mr¡£¡¡Turpin¡£¡¨



¡¨Go¡¡soak¡¡your¡¡shield£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡Turpin¡£¡¡¡¡¡¨Vivien¡¡knows

how¡¡to¡¡take¡¡care¡¡of¡¡herself¡¡in¡¡a¡¡pool¡­room¡£¡¡¡¡She's¡¡not

dropping¡¡anything¡¡on¡¡the¡¡ponies¡£¡¡¡¡There¡¡must¡¡be¡¡some¡­

thing¡¡queer¡¡going¡¡on¡¡here¡£¡¨



¡¨Nothing¡¡but¡¡Browning£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡the¡¡captain¡£¡¡¡¡¡¨Hear

that£¿¡¨



¡¨Thanatopsis¡¡by¡¡a¡¡nose£»¡¨¡¡drawled¡¡the¡¡man¡¡at¡¡the

telephone¡£



¡¨That's¡¡not¡¡Browning£»¡¡that's¡¡Longfellow£»¡¨¡¡said

Turpin£»¡¡who¡¡sometimes¡¡read¡¡books¡£



¡¨Back¡¡to¡¡the¡¡pasture£¡¡¨¡¡¡¡exclaimed¡¡the¡¡captain¡£¡¡¡¡¡¨long¡­

fellow¡¡made¡¡the¡¡pacing¡­to¡­wagon¡¡record¡¡of¡¡7¡£53¡¡'way

back¡¡in¡¡1868¡£¡¨



¡¨I¡¡believe¡¡there's¡¡something¡¡queer¡¡about¡¡this¡¡joint£»¡¨

repeated¡¡Turpin¡£



¡¨I¡¡don't¡¡see¡¡it£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡the¡¡captain¡£



¡¨I¡¡know¡¡it¡¡looks¡¡like¡¡a¡¡pool¡­room£»¡¡all¡¡right£»¡¨¡¡persisted

Turpin£»¡¡¡¨but¡¡that's¡¡all¡¡a¡¡blind¡£¡¡¡¡Vivien¡¡has¡¡been¡¡dropping

a¡¡lot¡¡of¡¡coin¡¡somewhere¡£¡¡¡¡I¡¡believe¡¡there's¡¡some¡¡under¡­

handed¡¡work¡¡going¡¡on¡¡here¡£¡¨



A¡¡number¡¡of¡¡racing¡¡sheets¡¡were¡¡tacked¡¡close¡¡together£»

covering¡¡a¡¡large¡¡space¡¡on¡¡one¡¡of¡¡the¡¡walls¡£¡¡¡¡Turpin£»

suspicious£»¡¡tore¡¡several¡¡

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