whirligigs-第20节

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ious　May。　　With　the　cool　pulses　of　a　virgin　of　Cologne

she　withstood　the　attack　of　the　ethereal　mildness。　　The

arrows　of　the　pleasant　sunshine　fell　back；　frostbitten；

from　the　cold　panoply　of　her　unthrilled　bosom。　　The

odour　of　the　flowers　waked　no　soft　sentiments　in　the

unexplored　recesses　of　her　dormant　heart。　　The　chirp　of

the　sparrows　gave　her　a　pain。　　She　mocked　at　May。



But　although　Miss　Coulson　was　proof　against　the

season；　she　was　keen　enough　to　estimate　its　power。　　She

knew　that　elderly　men　and　thick…waisted　women　jumped

as　educated　fleas　in　the　ridiculous　train　of　May；　the　merry

mocker　of　the　months。　　She　had　heard　of　foolish　old

gentlemen　marrying　their　housekeepers　before。　　What　a

humiliating　thing；　after　all；　was　this　feeling　called

love！



The　next　morning　at　8　o'clock；　when　the　iceman　called；

the　cook　told　him　that　Miss　Coulson　wanted　to　see　him

in　the　basement。



〃Well；　ain't　I　the　Olcott　and　Depew；　not　mentioning

the　first　name　at　all？〃　　said　the　iceman；　admiringly；　of

himself。



As　a　concession　he　rolled　his　sleeves　down；　dropped　his

icehooks　on　a　syringe　and　went　back。　　When　Miss　Van

Meeker　Constantia　Coulson　addressed　him　he　took　off

his　bat。



〃There　is　a　rear　entrance　to　this　basement；〃　said　Miss

Coulson；　〃which　can　be　reached　by　driving　into　the

vacant　lot　next　door；　where　they　are　excavating　for　a

building。　　I　want　you　to　bring　in　that　way　within　two

hours　1；000　pounds　of　ice。　　You　may　have　to　bring

another　man　or　two　to　help　you。　　I　will　show　you　where

I　want　it　placed。　　I　also　want　1；000　pounds　a　day　delivered

the　same　way　for　the　next　four　days。　　Your　company　may

charge　the　ice　on　our　regular　bill。　　This　is　for　your　extra

trouble。〃



Miss　Coulson　tendered　a　ten…dollar　bill。　　The　iceman

bowed；　and　held　his　hat　in　his　two　hands　behind　him。



〃Not　if　you'll　excuse　me；　lady。　　It'll　be　a　pleasure　to

fix　things　up　for　you　any　way　you　please。〃



Alas　for　May！



About　noon　Mr。　Coulson　knocked　two　glasses　off　his

table；　broke　the　spring　of　his　bell　and　yelled　for　Higgins

at　the　same　time。



〃Bring　an　axe；〃　commanded　Mr。　Coulson；　sardoni…

cally；　〃or　send　out　for　a　quart　of　prussic　acid；　or　have　a

policeman　come　in　and　shoot　me。　　I'd　rather　that　than

be　frozen　to　death。〃



〃It　does　seem　to　be　getting　cool；　Sir；〃　said　Higgins。

〃I　hadn't　noticed　it　before。　　I'll　close　the　window；　Sir。〃



〃Do；〃　said　Mr。　Coulson。　　〃They　call　this　spring；

do　they？　　If　it　keeps　up　long　I'll　go　back　to　Palm　Beach。

House　feels　like　a　morgue。〃



Later　Miss　Coulson　dutifully　came　in　to　inquire　how

the　gout　was　progressing。



〃'Stantia；〃　said　the　old　man；　〃how　is　the　weather　out…

doors？〃



〃Bright；〃　answered　Miss　Coulson；　〃but　chilly。〃



〃Feels　like　the　dead　of　winter　to　me；〃　said　Mr。　Coulson。



〃An　instance；〃　said　Constantia；　gazing　abstractedly

out　the　window；　〃　of　'winter　lingering　in　the　lap　of　spring；'

though　the　metaphor　is　not　in　the　most　refined　taste。〃



A　little　later　she　walked　down　by　the　side　of　the　little

park　and　on　westward　to　Broadway　to　accomplish　a

little　shopping。



A　little　later　than　that　Mrs。　Widdup　entered　the　invalid's

room。



〃Did　you　ring；　Sir？〃　　she　asked；　dimpling　in　many

places。　　〃I　asked　Higgins　to　go　to　the　drug　store；　and　I

thought　I　heard　your　bell。〃



〃I　did　not；〃　said　Mr。　Coulson。



〃I'm　afraid；〃　said　Mrs。　Widdup；　〃I　interrupted　you

sir；　yesterday　when　you　were　about　to　say　something。〃



〃How　comes　it；　Mrs。　Widdup；〃　said　old　man　Coulson

sternly；　〃that　I　find　it　so　cold　in　this　house？〃



〃Cold；　Sir？〃　　said　the　housekeeper；　〃why；　now；　since

you　speak　of　it　it　do　seem　cold　in　this　room。　　But；　out…

doors　it's　as　warm　and　fine　as　June；　sir。　　And　how　this

weather　do　seem　to　make　one's　heart　jump　out　of　one's

shirt　waist；　sir。　　And　the　ivy　all　leaved　out　on　the　side

of　the　house；　and　the　hand…organs　playing；　and　the

children　dancing　on　the　sidewalk　　'tis　a　great　time　for

speaking　out　what's　in　the　heart。　　You　were　saying

yesterday；　sir　　〃



〃Woman！〃　　roared　Mr。　Coulson；　〃you　are　a　fool。　　I

pay　you　to　take　care　of　this　house。　　I　am　freezing　to

death　in　my　own　room；　and　you　come　in　and　drivel　to

me　about　ivy　and　hand…organs。　　Get　me　an　overcoat　at

once。　　See　that　all　doors　and　windows　are　closed　below。

An　old；　fat；　irresponsible；　one…sided　object　like　you　prat…

ing　about　springtime　and　flowers　in　the　middle　of　winter！

When　Higgins　comes　back；　tell　him　to　bring　me　a　hot　rum

punch。　　And　now　get　out！〃



But　who　shall　shame　the　bright　face　of　May？　　Rogue

though　she　be　and　disturber　of　sane　men's　peace；　no　wise

virgins　cunning　nor　cold　storage　shall　make　her　bow　her

head　in　the　bright　galaxy　of　months。



Oh；　yes；　the　story　was　not　quite　finished。



A　night　passed；　and　Higgins　helped　old　man　Coulson

in　the　morning　to　his　chair　by　the　window。　　The　cold　of

the　room　was　gone。　　Heavenly　odours　and　fragrant　mild…

ness　entered。



In　hurried　Mrs。　Widdup；　and　stood　by　his　chair。　　Mr。

Coulson　reached　his　bony　hand　and　grasped　her　plump　one。



〃Mrs。　Widdup；〃　he　said；　〃this　house　would　be　no

home　without　you。　　I　have　half　a　million　dollars。　　If　that

and　the　true　affection　of　a　heart　no　lonoer　in　its　youthful

prime；　but　still　not　cold；　could　　〃



〃I　found　out　what　made　it　cold；〃　said　Mrs。　Widdup；

leanin'　against　his　chair。　　〃'Twas　ice　　tons　of　it　

in　the　basement　and　in　the　furnace　room；　everywhere。　　I

shut　off　the　registers　that　it　was　coming　through　into　your

room；　Mr。　Coulson；　poor　soul！　　And　now　it's　Maytime

again。〃



〃A　true　heart；〃　went　on　old　man　Coulson；　a　little

wanderingly；　〃that　the　springtime　has　brought　to　life

again；　and　　but　what　will　my　daughter　say；　Mrs。

Widdup？〃



〃Never　fear；　sir；〃　said　Mrs。　Widdup；　cheerfully。

〃Miss　Coulson；　she　ran　away　with　the　iceman　last　night；

sir！〃







　　　　　　　　　　　　　　A　TECHNICAL　ERROR



I　never　cared　especially　for　feuds；　believing　them

to　be　even　more　overrated　products　of　our　country　than

grapefruit；　scrapple；　or　honeymoons。　　Nevertheless；　if

I　may　be　allowed；　I　will　tell　you　of　an　Indian　Territory

feud　of　which　I　was　press…agent；　camp…follower；　and

inaccessory　during　the　fact。



I　was　on　a　visit　to　Sam　Durkee's　ranch；　where　I　had　a

great　time　falling　off　unmanicured　ponies　and　waving

my　bare　hand　at　the　lower　jaws　of　wolves　about　two

miles　away。　　Sam　was　a　hardened　person　of　about　twenty…

five；　with　a　reputation　for　going　home　in　the　dark　with

perfect　equanimity；　though　often　with　reluctance。



Over　in　the　Creek　Nation　was　a　family　bearing　the

name　of　Tatum。　　I　was　told　that　the　Durkees　and　Tatums

had　been　feuding　for　years。　　Several　of　each　family　had

bitten　the　grass；　and　it　was　expected　that　more　Nebuchad…

nezzars　would　follow。　　A　younger　generation　of　each　family

was　growing　up；　and　the　grass　was　keeping　pace　with　them。

But　I　gathered　that　they　had　fought　fairly；　that　they　had

not　lain　in　cornfields　and　aimed　at　the　division　of　their

enemies'　suspenders　in　the　back　　partly；　perhaps；

because　there　were　no　cornfields；　and　nobody　wore　more

than　one　suspender。　　Nor　had　any　woman　or　child　of

either　house　ever　been　harmed。　　In　those　days　　and

you　will　find　it　so　yet　　their　women　were　safe。



Sam　Durkee　had　a　girl。　　（If　it　were　an　all…fiction

magazine　that　I　expect　to　sell　this　story　to；　I　should　say；

〃Mr。　Durkee　rejoiced　in　a　fianc閑。〃）　　Her　name　was

Ella　Baynes。　　They　appeared　to　be　devoted　to　each

other；　and　to　have　perfect　confidence　in　each　other；　as　all

couples　do　who　are　and　have　or　aren't　and　haven't。　　She

was　tolerably　pretty；　with　a　heavy　mass　of　brown　hair

that　helped　her　along。　　He　introduced　me　to　her；　which

seemed　not　to　lessen　her　preference　for　him；　so　I　reasoned

that　they　were　surely　soul…mates。



Miss　Baynes　lived　in　Kingfisher；　twenty　miles　from

the　ranch。　　Sam　lived　on　a　gallop　between　the　two　places。



One　day　there　came　to　Kingfisher　a　courageous　young

man；　rather　small；　with　smooth　face　and　regular　features。

He　made　many　inquiries　about　the　business　of　the　town；

and　especially　of　the　inhabitants　cognominally。　　He

said　he　was　from　Muscogee；　and　he　looked　it；　with　his

yellow　shoes　and　crocheted　four…in…hand。　　I　met　him

once　when　I　rode　in　for　the　mail。　　He　said　his　name　was

Beverly　Travers；　which　seemed　rather　improbable。



There　were　active　times　on　the　ranch；　just　then；　and

Sam　was　too　busy　to　go　to　town　often。　　As　an　incom…

petent　and　generally　worthless　guest；　it　devolved　upon

me　to　ride　in　for　little　things　such　as　post　cards；　barrels

of　flour；　baking…powder；　smoking…tobacco；　and　　letters

from　Ella。



One　day；　when　I　was　messenger　for　half　a　gross　of

cigarette　papers　and　a　couple　of　wagon　tires；　I　saw　the

alleged　Beverly　Travers　in　a　yellow…wheeled　buggy　with

Ella　Baynes；　driving　about　town　as　ostentatiously　as　the

black；　waxy　mud　would　permit。　　I　knew　that　this　inf