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第9节

burlesques-第9节

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Alas! who would have thought those two gallant heads would be so

soon laid low?  My wife has a pair of earrings which the latter;

who always wore them; presented to herbut we are advancing

matters。  Anybody could see; 〃avec un demioeil;〃 as the Prince of

Benevento remarked; how affairs went between me and Blanche; but

though she loathed him for his cruelties and the odiousness of his

person; the brutal Cambaceres still pursued his designs upon her。



I recollect it was on St。 Patrick's Day。  My lovely friend had

procured; from the gardens of the Empress Josephine; at Malmaison

(whom we loved a thousand times more than her Austrian successor; a

sandy…haired woman; between ourselves; with an odious squint); a

quantity of shamrock wherewith to garnish the hotel; and all the

Irish in Paris were invited to the national festival。



I and Prince Talleyrand danced a double hornpipe with Pauline

Bonaparte and Madame de Stael; Marshal Soult went down a couple of

sets with Madame Recamier; and Robespierre's widowan excellent;

gentle creature; quite unlike her husbandstood up with the

Austrian ambassador。  Besides; the famous artists Baron Gros; David

and Nicholas Poussin; and Canova; who was in town making a statue

of the Emperor for Leo X。; and; in a word; all the celebrities of

Parisas my gifted countrywoman; the wild Irish girl; calls them

were assembled in the Marquis's elegant receiving…rooms。



At last a great outcry was raised for La Gigue Irlandaise!  La

Gigue Irlandaise! a dance which had made a fureur amongst the

Parisians ever since the lovely Blanche Sarsfield had danced it。

She stepped forward and took me for a partner; and amidst the

bravoes of the crowd; in which stood Ney; Murat; Lannes; the Prince

of Wagram; and the Austrian ambassador; we showed to the beau monde

of the French capital; I flatter myself; a not unfavorable specimen

of the dance of our country。



As I was cutting the double…shuffle; and toe…and…heeling it in the

〃rail〃 style; Blanche danced up to me; smiling; and said; 〃Be on

your guard; I see Cambaceres talking to Fouche; the Duke of

Otranto; about us; and when Otranto turns his eyes upon a man; they

bode him no good。〃



〃Cambaceres is jealous;〃 said I。  〃I have it;〃 says she; 〃I'll make

him dance a turn with me。〃  So; presently; as the music was going

like mad all this time; I pretended fatigue from my late wounds;

and sat down。  The lovely Blanche went up smiling; and brought out

Cambaceres as a second partner。



The Marshal is a lusty man; who makes desperate efforts to give

himself a waist; and the effect of the exercise upon him was

speedily visible。  He puffed and snorted like a walrus; drops

trickled down his purple face; while my lovely mischief of a

Blanche went on dancing at treble quick; till she fairly danced him

down。



〃Who'll take the flure with me?〃 said the charming girl; animated

by the sport。



〃Faix; den; 'tis I; Lanty Clancy!〃 cried my rascal; who had been

mad with excitement at the scene; and; stepping in with a whoop and

a hurroo; he began to dance with such rapidity as made all present

stare。



As the couple were footing it; there was a noise as of a rapid

cavalcade traversing the Place Vendome; and stopping at the

Marquis's door。  A crowd appeared to mount the stair; the great

doors of the reception…room were flung open; and two pages

announced their Majesties the Emperor and the Empress。  So engaged

were Lanty and Blanche; that they never heard the tumult occasioned

by the august approach。



It was indeed the Emperor; who; returning from the Theatre

Francais; and seeing the Marquis's windows lighted up; proposed to

the Empress to drop in on the party。  He made signs to the

musicians to continue: and the conqueror of Marengo and Friedland

watched with interest the simple evolutions of two happy Irish

people。  Even the Empress smiled and; seeing this; all the

courtiers; including Naples and Talleyrand; were delighted。



〃Is not this a great day for Ireland?〃 said the Marquis; with a

tear trickling down his noble face。  〃O Ireland!  O my country!

But no more of that。  Go up; Phil; you divvle; and offer her

Majesty the choice of punch or negus。〃



Among the young fellows with whom I was most intimate in Paris was

Eugene Beauharnais; the son of the ill…used and unhappy Josephine

by her former marriage with a French gentleman of good family。

Having a smack of the old blood in him; Eugene's manners were much

more refined than those of the new…fangled dignitaries of the

Emperor's Court; where (for my knife and fork were regularly laid

at the Tuileries) I have seen my poor friend Murat repeatedly

mistake a fork for a toothpick; and the gallant Massena devour

pease by means of his knife; in a way more innocent than graceful。

Talleyrand; Eugene; and I used often to laugh at these eccentricities

of our brave friends; who certainly did not shine in the

drawing…room; however brilliant they were in the field of battle。

The Emperor always asked me to take wine with him; and was full of

kindness and attention。



〃I like Eugene;〃 he would say; pinching my ear confidentially; as

his way was〃I like Eugene to keep company with such young fellows

as you; you have manners; you have principles; my rogues from the

camp have none。  And I like you; Philip my boy;〃 he added; 〃for

being so attentive to my poor wifethe Empress Josephine; I mean。〃

All these honors made my friends at the Marquis's very proud; and

my enemies at Court crever with envy。  Among these; the atrocious

Cambaceres was not the least active and envenomed。



The cause of the many attentions which were paid to me; and which;

like a vain coxcomb; I had chosen to attribute to my own personal

amiability; soon was apparent。  Having formed a good opinion of my

gallantry from my conduct in various actions and forlorn hopes

during the war; the Emperor was most anxious to attach me to his

service。  The Grand Cross of St。 Louis; the title of Count; the

command of a crack cavalry regiment; the l4me Chevaux Marins; were

the bribes that were actually offered to me; and must I say it?

Blanche; the lovely; the perfidious Blanche; was one of the agents

employed to tempt me to commit this act of treason。



〃Object to enter a foreign service!〃 she said; in reply to my

refusal。  〃It is you; Philip; who are in a foreign service。  The

Irish nation is in exile; and in the territories of its French

allies。  Irish traitors are not here; they march alone under the

accursed flag of the Saxon; whom the great Napoleon would have

swept from the face of the earth; but for the fatal valor of Irish

mercenaries!  Accept this offer; and my heart; my hand; my all are

yours。  Refuse it; Philip; and we part。〃



〃To wed the abominable Cambaceres!〃 I cried; stung with rage。  〃To

wear a duchess's coronet; Blanche!  Ha; ha!  Mushrooms; instead of

strawberry…leaves; should decorate the brows of the upstart French

nobility。  I shall withdraw my parole。  I demand to be sent to

prisonto be exchangedto dieanything rather than be a traitor;

and the tool of a traitress!〃  Taking up my hat; I left the room in

a fury; and flinging open the door tumbled over Cambaceres; who was

listening at the key…hole; and must have overheard every word of

our conversation。



We tumbled over each other; as Blanche was shrieking with laughter

at our mutual discomfiture。  Her scorn only made me more mad; and;

having spurs on; I began digging them into Cambaceres' fat sides as

we rolled on the carpet; until the Marshal howled with rage and

anger。



〃This insult must be avenged with blood!〃 roared the Duke of

Illyria。



〃I have already drawn it;〃 says I; 〃with my spurs。〃



〃Malheur et malediction!〃 roared the Marshal。



〃Hadn't you better settle your wig?〃 says I; offering it to him on

the tip of my cane; 〃and we'll arrange time and place when you have

put your jasey in order。〃  I shall never forget the look of revenge

which he cast at me; as I was thus turning him into ridicule before

his mistress。



〃Lady Blanche;〃 I continued bitterly; 〃as you look to share the

Duke's coronet; hadn't you better see to his wig?〃 and so saying; I

cocked my hat; and walked out of the Marquis's place; whistling

〃Garryowen。〃



I knew my man would not be long in following me; and waited for him

in the Place Vendome; where I luckily met Eugene too; who was

looking at the picture…shop in the corner。  I explained to him my

affair in a twinkling。  He at once agreed to go with me to the

ground; and commended me; rather than otherwise; for refusing the

offer which had been made to me。  〃I knew it would be so;〃 he said;

kindly; 〃I told my father you wouldn't。  A man with the blood of

the Fogarties; Phil my boy; doesn't wheel about like those fellows

of yesterday。〃  So; when Cambaceres came out; which he did

presently; with a more furious air than before; I handed him at

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