adam bede(亚当[1].比德)-第158节
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looked at her uneasily。 Dinah； he thought； had seemed to
disapprove him somehow lately； she had not been so kind and
open to him as she used to be。 He wanted her to look at him； and
be as pleased as he was himself with doing this bit of playful work。
But Dinah did not look at him—it was easy for her to avoid looking
at the tall man—and when at last there was no more dusting to be
done and no further excuse for him to linger near her； he could
bear it no longer； and said； in rather a pleading tone； “Dinah；
you’re not displeased with me for anything； are you？ I’ve not said
or done anything to make you think ill of me？”
The question surprised her； and relieved her by giving a new
course to her feeling。 She looked up at him now； quite earnestly；
almost with the tears coming； and said； “Oh； no； Adam！ how could
you think so？”
“I couldn’t bear you not to feel as much a friend to me as I do to
you；” said Adam。 “And you don’t know the value I set on the very
thought of you； Dinah。 That was what I meant yesterday； when I
said I’d be content for you to go； if you thought right。 I meant； the
thought of you was worth so much to me； I should feel I ought to
be thankful； and not grumble； if you see right to go away。 You
know I do mind parting with you； Dinah？”
“Yes； dear friend；” said Dinah； trembling； but trying to speak
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calmly； “I know you have a brother’s heart towards me； and we
shall often be with one another in spirit； but at this season I am in
heaviness through manifold temptations。 You must not mark me。 I
feel called to leave my kindred for a while； but it is a trial—the
flesh is weak。”
Adam saw that it pained her to be obliged to answer。
“I hurt you by talking about it； Dinah；” he said。 “I’ll say no
more。 Let’s see if Seth’s ready with breakfast now。”
That is a simple scene； reader。 But it is almost certain that you；
too； have been in love—perhaps； even； more than once； though
you may not choose to say so to all your feminine friends。 If so； you
will no more think the slight words； the timid looks； the tremulous
touches； by which two human souls approach each other
gradually； like two little quivering rain…streams； before they
mingle into one—you will no more think these things trivial than
you will think the first…detected signs of coming spring trivial；
though they be but a faint indescribable something in the air and
in the song of the birds； and the tiniest perceptible budding on the
hedge…row branches。 Those slight words and looks and touches
are part of the soul’s language； and the finest language； I believe；
is chiefly made up of unimposing words； such as “light；” “sound；”
“stars；” “music”—words really not worth looking at； or hearing； in
themselves； any more than “chips” or “sawdust。” It is only that
they happen to be the signs of something unspeakably great and
beautiful。 I am of opinion that love is a great and beautiful thing
too； and if you agree with me； the smallest signs of it will not be
chips and sawdust to you： they will rather be like those little
words； “light” and “music；” stirring the long…winding fibres of
your memory and enriching your present with your most precious
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past。
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Chapter LI
Sunday Morning
isbeth’s touch of rheumatism could not be made to appear
Lserious enough to detain Dinah another night from the
Hall Farm； now she had made up her mind to leave her
aunt so soon； and at evening the friends must part。 “For a long
while；” Dinah had said； for she had told Lisbeth of her resolve。
“Then it’ll be for all my life； an’ I shall ne’er see thee again；”
said Lisbeth。 “Long while！ I’n got no long while t’ live。 An’ I shall
be took bad an’ die； an’ thee canst ne’er come a…nigh me； an’ I shall
die a…longing for thee。”
That had been the key…note of her wailing talk all day； for Adam
was not in the house； and so she put no restraint on her
complaining。 She had tried poor Dinah by returning again and
again to the question； why she must go away； and refusing to
accept reasons； which seemed to her nothing but whim and
“contrairiness”； and still more； by regretting that she “couldna’ ha’
one o’ the lads” and be her daughter。
“Thee couldstna put up wi’ Seth；” she said。 “He isna cliver
enough for thee； happen； but he’d ha’ been very good t’ thee—he’s
as handy as can be at doin’ things for me when I’m bad； an’ he’s as
fond o’ the Bible an’ chappellin’ as thee art thysen。 But happen；
thee’dst like a husband better as isna just the cut o’ thysen： the
runnin’ brook isna athirst for th’ rain。 Adam ’ud ha’ done for
thee—I know he would—an’ he might come t’ like thee well
enough； if thee’dst stop。 But he’s as stubborn as th’ iron bar—
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there’s no bending him no way but ’s own。 But he’d be a fine
husband for anybody； be they who they will； so looked…on an’ so
cliver as he is。 And he’d be rare an’ lovin’： it does me good on’y a
look o’ the lad’s eye when he means kind tow’rt me。”
Dinah tried to escape from Lisbeth’s closest looks and questions
by finding little tasks of housework that kept her moving about；
and as soon as Seth came home in the evening she put on her
bonnet to go。 It touched Dinah keenly to say the last good…bye； and
still more to look round on her way across the fields and see the
old woman still standing at the door； gazing after her till she must
have been the faintest speck in the dim aged eyes。 “The God of
love and peace be with them；” Dinah prayed； as she looked back
from the last stile。 “Make them glad according to the days wherein
thou hast afflicted them； and the years wherein they have seen
evil。 It is thy will that I should part from them； let me have no will
but thine。”
Lisbeth turned into the house at last and sat down in the
workshop near Seth； who was busying himself there with fitting
some bits of turned wood he had brought from the village into a
small work…box； which he meant to give to Dinah before she went
away。
“Thee ’t see her again o’ Sunday afore she goes；” were her first
words。 “If thee wast good for anything； thee’dst make her come in
again o’ Sunday night wi’ thee； and see me once more。”
“Nay； Mother；” said Seth。 “Dinah ’ud be sure to come again if
she saw right to come。 I should have no need to persuade her。 She
only thinks it ’ud be troubling thee for nought； just to come in to
say good…bye over again。”
“She’d ne’er go away； I know； if Adam ’ud be fond on her an’
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marry her； but everything’s so contrairy；” said Lisbeth； with a
burst of vexation。
Seth paused a moment and looked up； with a slight blush； at his
mother’s face。 “What！ Has she said anything o’ that sort to thee；
Mot
