adam bede(亚当[1].比德)-第130节
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find Hetty at Snowfield。”
Mr。 Poyser’s good…natured face showed signs of troubled
astonishment。 “Not find her？ What’s happened to her？” he said；
his thoughts flying at once to bodily accident。
“That I can’t tell； whether anything’s happened to her。 She
never went to Snowfield—she took the coach to Stoniton； but I
can’t learn nothing of her after she got down from the Stoniton
coach。”
“Why； you donna mean she’s run away？” said Martin； standing
still； so puzzled and bewildered that the fact did not yet make itself
felt as a trouble by him。
“She must ha’ done；” said Adam。 “She didn’t like our marriage
when it came to the point—that must be it。 She’d mistook her
feelings。”
Martin was silent for a minute or two； looking on the ground
and rooting up the grass with his spud； without knowing what he
was doing。 His usual slowness was always trebled when the
subject of speech was painful。 At last he looked up； right in Adam’s
face； saying； “Then she didna deserve t’ ha’ ye； my lad。 An’ I feel i’
fault myself； for she was my niece； and I was allays hot for her
marr’ing ye。 There’s no amends I can make ye； lad—the more’s
the pity： it’s a sad cut…up for ye； I doubt。”
Adam could say nothing； and Mr。 Poyser； after pursuing his
walk for a little while； went on； “I’ll be bound she’s gone after
trying to get a lady’s maid’s place； for she’d got that in her head
half a year ago； and wanted me to gi’ my consent。 But I’d thought
better on her”—he added； shaking his head slowly and sadly—“I’d
thought better on her； nor to look for this； after she’d gi’en y’ her
word； an’ everything been got ready。”
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Adam had the strongest motives for encouraging this
supposition in Mr。 Poyser； and he even tried to believe that it
might possibly be true。 He had no warrant for the certainty that
she was gone to Arthur。
“It was better it should be so；” he said； as quietly as he could； “if
she felt she couldn’t like me for a husband。 Better run away before
than repent after。 I hope you won’t look harshly on her if she
comes back； as she may do if she finds it hard to get on away from
home。”
“I canna look on her as I’ve done before；” said Martin
decisively。 “She’s acted bad by you； and by all of us。 But I’ll not
turn my back on her： she’s but a young un； and it’s the first harm
I’ve knowed on her。 It’ll be a hard job for me to tell her aunt。 Why
didna Dinah come back wi’ ye？ She’d ha’ helped to pacify her aunt
a bit。”
“Dinah wasn’t at Snowfield。 She’s been gone to Leeds this
fortnight； and I couldn’t learn from th’ old woman any direction
where she is at Leeds； else I should ha’ brought it you。”
“She’d a deal better be staying wi’ her own kin；” said Mr。
Poyser； indignantly； “than going preaching among strange folks a…
that’n。”
“I must leave you now； Mr。 Poyser；” said Adam； “for I’ve a deal
to see to。”
“Aye； you’d best be after your business； and I must tell the
missis when I go home。 It’s a hard job。”
“But；” said Adam； “I beg particular； you’ll keep what’s
happened quiet for a week or two。 I’ve not told my mother yet； and
there’s no knowing how things may turn out。”
“Aye； aye； least said； soonest mended。 We’n no need to say why
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the match is broke off； an’ we may hear of her after a bit。 Shake
hands wi’ me； lad： I wish I could make thee amends。”
There was something in Martin Poyser’s throat at that moment
which caused him to bring out those scanty words in rather a
broken fashion。 Yet Adam knew what they meant all the better；
and the two honest men grasped each other’s hard hands in
mutual understanding。
There was nothing now to hinder Adam from setting off。 He
had told Seth to go to the Chase and leave a message for the
squire； saying that Adam Bede had been obliged to start off
suddenly on a journey—and to say as much； and no more； to any
one else who made inquiries about him。 If the Poysers learned
that he was gone away again； Adam knew they would infer that he
was gone in search of Hetty。
He had intended to go right on his way from the Hall Farm； but
now the impulse which had frequently visited him before—to go to
Mr。 Irwine； and make a confidant of him—recurred with the new
force which belongs to a last opportunity。 He was about to start on
a long journey—a difficult one—by sea—and no soul would know
where he was gone。 If anything happened to him？ Or； if he
absolutely needed help in any matter concerning Hetty？ Mr。
Irwine was to be trusted； and the feeling which made Adam shrink
from telling anything which was her secret must give way before
the need there was that she should have some one else besides
himself who would be prepared to defend her in the worst
extremity。 Towards Arthur； even though he might have incurred
no new guilt； Adam felt that he was not bound to keep silence
when Hetty’s interest called on him to speak。
“I must do it；” said Adam； when these thoughts； which had
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spread themselves through hours of his sad journeying； now
rushed upon him in an instant； like a wave that had been slowly
gathering； “it’s the right thing。 I can’t stand alone in this way any
longer。”
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Chapter XXXIX
The Tidings
dam turned his face towards Broxton and walked with his
Aswiftest stride； looking at his watch with the fear that Mr。
Irwine might be gone out—hunting； perhaps。 The fear
and haste together produced a state of strong excitement before
he reached the rectory gate； and outside it he saw the deep marks
of a recent hoof on the gravel。
But the hoofs were turned towards the gate； not away from it；
and though there was a horse against the stable door； it was not
Mr。 Irwine’s： it had evidently had a journey this morning； and
must belong to some one who had come on business。 Mr。 Irwine
was at home； then； but Adam could hardly find breath and
calmness to tell Carroll that he wanted to speak to the rector。 The
double suffering of certain and uncertain sorrow had begun to
shake the strong man。 The butler looked at him wonderingly； as
he threw himself on a bench in the passage and stared absently at
the clock on the opposite wall。 The master had somebody with
him； he said； but he heard the study door open—the stranger
seemed to be coming out； and as Adam was in a hurry； he would
let the master know at once。
Adam sat looking at the clock： the minute…hand was hurrying
along the last five minutes to ten with a loud； hard； indifferent tick；
and Adam watched the movement and listened to the sound as if
he had had some reason for doing so。 In our times of bitter
suffering there are almost always these pauses； when our
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