adam bede(亚当[1].比德)-第116节
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company。” He could perhaps have given no precise form to the
reasons that determined this conclusion； but it is well known to all
experienced minds that our firmest convictions are often
dependent on subtle impressions for which words are quite too
coarse a medium。 However it was； no one from the Poyser family
went to church that afternoon except Hetty and the boys； yet
Adam was bold enough to join them after church； and say that he
would walk home with them； though all the way through the
village he appeared to be chiefly occupied with Marty and Tommy；
telling them about the squirrels in Binton Coppice； and promising
to take them there some day。 But when they came to the fields he
said to the boys； “Now； then； which is the stoutest walker？ Him as
gets to th’ home…gate first shall be the first to go with me to Binton
Coppice on the donkey。 But Tommy must have the start up to the
next stile； because he’s the smallest。”
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Adam had never behaved so much like a determined lover
before。 As soon as the boys had both set off； he looked down at
Hetty and said； “Won’t you hang on my arm； Hetty？” in a pleading
tone； as if he had already asked her and she had refused。 Hetty
looked up at him smilingly and put her round arm through his in a
moment。 It was nothing to her； putting her arm through Adam’s；
but she knew he cared a great deal about having her arm through
his； and she wished him to care。 Her heart beat no faster； and she
looked at the half…bare hedgerows and the ploughed field with the
same sense of oppressive dulness as before。 But Adam scarcely felt
that he was walking。 He thought Hetty must know that he was
pressing her arm a little—a very little。 Words rushed to his lips
that he dared not utter—that he had made up his mind not to utter
yet—and so he was silent for the length of that field。 The calm
patience with which he had once waited for Hetty’s love； content
only with her presence and the thought of the future； had forsaken
him since that terrible shock nearly three months ago。 The
agitations of jealousy had given a new restlessness to his passion—
had made fear and uncertainty too hard almost to bear。 But
though he might not speak to Hetty of his love； he would tell her
about his new prospects and see if she would be pleased。 So when
he was enough master of himself to talk； he said； “I’m going to tell
your uncle some news that’ll surprise him； Hetty； and I think he’ll
be glad to hear it too。”
“What’s that？” Hetty said indifferently。
“Why； Mr。 Burge has offered me a share in his business； and
I’m going to take it。”
There was a change in Hetty’s face； certainly not produced by
any agreeable impression from this news。 In fact she felt a
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momentary annoyance and alarm； for she had so often heard it
hinted by her uncle that Adam might have Mary Burge and a
share in the business any day； if he liked； that she associated the
two objects now； and the thought immediately occurred that
perhaps Adam had given her up because of what had happened
lately； and had turned towards Mary Burge。 With that thought；
and before she had time to remember any reasons why it could not
be true； came a new sense of forsakenness and disappointment。
The one thing—the one person—her mind had rested on in its dull
weariness； had slipped away from her； and peevish misery filled
her eyes with tears。 She was looking on the ground； but Adam saw
her face； saw the tears； and before he had finished saying； “Hetty；
dear Hetty； what are you crying for？” his eager rapid thought had
flown through all the causes conceivable to him； and had at last
alighted on half the true one。 Hetty thought he was going to marry
Mary Burge—she didn’t like him to marry—perhaps she didn’t
like him to marry any one but herself？ All caution was swept
away—all reason for it was gone； and Adam could feel nothing but
trembling joy。 He leaned towards her and took her hand； as he
said：
“I could afford to be married now； Hetty—I could make a wife
comfortable； but I shall never want to be married if you won’t have
me。”
Hetty looked up at him and smiled through her tears； as she
had done to Arthur that first evening in the wood； when she had
thought he was not coming； and yet he came。 It was a feebler
relief； a feebler triumph she felt now； but the great dark eyes and
the sweet lips were as beautiful as ever； perhaps more beautiful；
for there was a more luxuriant womanliness about Hetty of late。
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Adam could hardly believe in the happiness of that moment。 His
right hand held her left； and he pressed her arm close against his
heart as he leaned down towards her。
“Do you really love me； Hetty？ Will you be my own wife； to love
and take care of as long as I live？”
Hetty did not speak； but Adam’s face was very close to hers； and
she put up her round cheek against his； like a kitten。 She wanted
to be caressed—she wanted to feel as if Arthur were with her
again。
Adam cared for no words after that； and they hardly spoke
through the rest of the walk。 He only said； “I may tell your uncle
and aunt； mayn’t I； Hetty？” and she said； “Yes。”
The red fire…light on the hearth at the Hall Farm shone on
joyful faces that evening； when Hetty was gone upstairs and Adam
took the opportunity of telling Mr。 and Mrs。 Poyser and the
grandfather that he saw his way to maintaining a wife now； and
that Hetty had consented to have him。
“I hope you have no objections against me for her husband；”
said Adam； “I’m a poor man as yet； but she shall want nothing as I
can work for。”
“Objections？” said Mr。 Poyser； while the grandfather leaned
forward and brought out his long “Nay； nay。” “What objections
can we ha’ to you； lad？ Never mind your being poorish as yet；
there’s money in your head…piece as there’s money i’ the sown
field； but it must ha’ time。 You’ve got enough to begin on； and we
can do a deal tow’rt the bit o’ furniture you’ll want。 Thee ’st got
feathers and linen to spare—plenty； eh？”
This question was of course addressed to Mrs。 Poyser； who was
wrapped up in a warm shawl and was too hoarse to speak with her
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usual facility。 At first she only nodded emphatically； but she was
presently unable to resist the temptation to be more explicit。
“It ’ud be a poor tale if I hadna feathers and linen；” she said；
hoarsely； “when I never sell a fowl but what’s plucked； and the
wheel’s a…going every day o’ the week。”
“Come； my wench；” said Mr。 Poyser； when Hetty came down；
“come and kiss us； and let us wish you luck。”
Hetty went very quietly and kissed the big good…natured man。
“There！” he said； patting her on the back； “go and kiss your
aunt and your grandfather。 I’m as wishful t’ have you settled well
as if you was my own daughter； and so’s your aunt； I’ll be bound；
for she’s done by you this seven ’ear； Hetty； as if you’d been her
own。 Come； come； now；” he went on； becoming jocose； as soon as
Hetty had kissed her aunt and the
