the story of a pioneer-第4节

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together　like　children。　　She　had　wonderful　toys　for

me；　and　pictures　and　books；　but　the　thing　I　loved

best　of　all　and　played　with　for　hours　was　a　little

stuffed　hen　which　she　told　me　had　been　her　dearest

treasure　when　she　was　a　child　at　home。　　She　had

also　a　stuffed　puppy；　and　she　once　mentioned　that

those　two　things　alone　were　left　of　her　life　as

a　little　girl。　　Besides　the　toys　and　books　and　pic…

tures；　she　gave　me　ice…cream　and　cake；　and　told　me

fairy…tales。　　She　had　a　wonderful　understanding　of

what　a　child　likes。　　There　were　half　a　dozen　women

in　the　house　with　her；　but　I　saw　none　of　them　nor

any　of　the　men　who　came。



Once；　when　we　had　become　very　good　friends

indeed　and　my　early　shyness　had　departed；　I

found　courage　to　ask　her　where　the　ghost　was

the　ghost　that　haunted　her　house。　　I　can　still　see

the　look　in　her　eyes　as　they　met　mine。　　She　told

me　the　ghost　lived　in　her　heart；　and　that　she　did

not　like　to　talk　about　it；　and　that　we　must　not

speak　of　it　again。　　After　that　I　never　mentioned　it；

but　I　was　more　deeply　interested　than　ever；　for　a

ghost　that　lived　in　a　heart　was　a　new　kind　of　ghost

to　me　at　that　time；　though　I　have　met　many　of

them　since　then。　　During　all　our　intercourse　my

mother　never　entered　the　house　next　door；　nor　did

my　mysterious　lady　enter　our　home；　but　she　con…

stantly　sent　my　mother　secret　gifts　for　the　poor　and

the　sick　of　the　neighborhood；　and　she　was　always

the　first　to　offer　help　for　those　who　were　in　trouble。　

Many　years　afterward　mother　told　me　she　was　the

most　generous　woman　she　had　ever　known；　and

that　she　had　a　rarely　beautiful　nature。　　Our　depart…

ure　for　Michigan　broke　up　the　friendship；　but　I　have

never　forgotten　her；　and　whenever；　in　my　later

work　as　minister；　physician；　and　suffragist；　I　have

been　able　to　help　women　of　the　class　to　which　she

belonged；　I　have　mentally　offered　that　help　for　credit

in　the　tragic　ledger　of　her　life；　in　which　the　clean　and

the　blotted　pages　were　so　strange　a　contrast。



One　more　incident　of　Lawrence　I　must　describe

before　I　leave　that　city　behind　me；　as　we　left　it　for

ever　in　1859。　　While　we　were　still　there　a　number　of

Lawrence　men　decided　to　go　West；　and　amid　great

public　excitement　they　departed　in　a　body　for　Kansas；

where　they　founded　the　town　of　Lawrence　in　that

state。　　I　recall　distinctly　the　public　interest　which

attended　their　going；　and　the　feeling　every　one

seemed　to　have　that　they　were　passing　forever　out

of　the　civilized　world。　　Their　farewells　to　their

friends　were　eternal；　no　one　expected　to　see　them

again；　and　my　small　brain　grew　dizzy　as　I　tried　to

imagine　a　place　so　remote　as　their　destination。　　It

was；　I　finally　decided；　at　the　uttermost　ends　of　the

earth；　and　it　seemed　quite　possible　that　the　brave

adventurers　who　reached　it　might　then　drop　off　into

space。　　Fifty　years　later　I　was　talking　to　a　Cali…

fornia　girl　who　complained　lightly　of　the　monotony

of　a　climate　where　the　sun　shone　and　the　flowers

bloomed　all　the　year　around。　　‘‘But　I　had　a　de…

lightful　change　last　year；''　she　added；　with　anima…

tion。　　‘‘I　went　East　for　the　winter。''



‘‘To　New　York？''　I　asked。



‘‘No；''　corrected　the　California　girl；　easily；　‘‘to

Lawrence；　Kansas。''



Nothing；　I　think；　has　ever　made　me　feel　quite　so

old　as　that　remark。　　That　in　my　life；　not　yet；　to　me

at　least；　a　long　one；　I　should　see　such　an　arc　de…

scribed　seemed　actually　oppressive　until　I　realized

that；　after　all；　the　arc　was　merely　a　rainbow　of　time

showing　how　gloriously　realized　were　the　hopes　of

the　Lawrence　pioneers。



The　move　to　Michigan　meant　a　complete　up…

heaval　in　our　lives。　　In　Lawrence　we　had　around　us

the　fine　flower　of　New　England　civilization。　　We

children　went　to　school；　our　parents；　though　they

were　in　very　humble　circumstances；　were　associated

with　the　leading　spirits　and　the　big　movements　of

the　day。　　When　we　went　to　Michigan　we　went　to

the　wilderness；　to　the　wild　pioneer　life　of　those　times；

and　we　were　all　old　enough　to　keenly　feel　the　change。



My　father　was　one　of　a　number　of　Englishmen　who

took　up　tracts　in　the　northern　forests　of　Michigan；

with　the　old　dream　of　establishing　a　colony　there。　

None　of　these　men　had　the　least　practical　knowledge

of　farming。　　They　were　city　men　or　followers　of

trades　which　had　no　connection　with　farm　life。　

They　went　straight　into　the　thick　timber…land；　in…

stead　of　going　to　the　rich　and　waiting　prairies；　and

they　crowned　this　initial　mistake　by　cutting　down

the　splendid　timber　instead　of　letting　it　stand。　

Thus　bird's…eye　maple　and　other　beautiful　woods

were　used　as　fire…wood　and　in　the　construction　of

rude　cabins；　and　the　greatest　asset　of　the　pioneers

was　ignored。



Father　preceded　us　to　the　Michigan　woods；　and

there；　with　his　oldest　son；　James；　took　up　a　claim。　

They　cleared　a　space　in　the　wilderness　just　large

enough　for　a　log　cabin；　and　put　up　the　bare　walls

of　the　cabin　itself。　　Then　father　returned　to　Law…

rence　and　his　work；　leaving　James　behind。　　A　few

months　later　（this　was　in　1859）；　my　mother；　my　two

sisters；　Eleanor　and　Mary；　my　youngest　brother；

Henry；　eight　years　of　age；　and　I；　then　twelve；　went

to　Michigan　to　work　on　and　hold　down　the　claim

while　father；　for　eighteen　months　longer；　stayed　on

in　Lawrence；　sending　us　such　remittances　as　he　could。　

His　second　and　third　sons；　John　and　Thomas；　re…

mained　in　the　East　with　him。



Every　detail　of　our　journey　through　the　wilder…

ness　is　clear　in　my　mind。　　At　that　time　the　railroad

terminated　at　Grand　Rapids；　Michigan；　and　we

covered　the　remaining　distanceabout　one　hundred

milesby　wagon；　riding　through　a　dense　and　often

trackless　forest。　　My　brother　James　met　us　at

Grand　Rapids　with　what；　in　those　days；　was　called

a　lumber…wagon；　but　which　had　a　horrible　resem…

blance　to　a　vehicle　from　the　health　department。　

My　sisters　and　I　gave　it　one　cold　look　and　turned

from　it；　we　were　so　pained　by　its　appearance　that

we　refused　to　ride　in　it　through　the　town。　　Instead；

we　started　off　on　foot；　trying　to　look　as　if　we　had　no

association　with　it；　and　we　climbed　into　the　un…

wieldy　vehicle　only　when　the　city　streets　were　far

behind　us。　　Every　available　inch　of　space　in　the

wagon　was　filled　with　bedding　and　provisions。　　As

yet　we　had　no　furniture；　we　were　to　make　that　for

ourselves　when　we　reached　our　cabin；　and　there

was　so　little　room　for　us　to　ride　that　we　children

walked　by　turns；　while　James；　from　the　beginning

of　the　journey　to　its　end；　seven　days　later；　led　our

weary　horses。



To　my　mother；　who　was　never　strong；　the　whole

experience　must　have　been　a　nightmare　of　suffering

and　stoical　endurance。　　For　us　children　there　were

compensations。　　The　expedition　took　on　the　char…

acter　of　a　high　adventure；　in　which　we　sometimes

had　shelter　and　sometimes　failed　to　find　it；　some…

times　were　fed；　but　often　went　hungry。　　We　forded

innumerable　streams；　the　wheels　of　the　heavy　wagon

sinking　so　deeply　into　the　stream…beds　that　we　often

had　to　empty　our　load　before　we　could　get　them　out

again。　　Fallen　trees　lay　across　our　paths；　rivers

caused　long　detours；　while　again　and　again　we　lost

our　way　or　were　turned　aside　by　impenetrable　forest

tangles。



Our　first　day's　journey　covered　less　than　eight

miles；　and　that　night　we　stopped　at　a　farm…house

which　was　the　last　bit　of　civilization　we　saw。　　Early

the　next　morning　we　were　off　again；　making　the　slow

progress　due　to　the　rough　roads　and　our　heavy　load。　

At　night　we　stopped　at　a　place　called　Thomas's

Inn；　only　to　be　told　by　the　woman　who　kept　it　that

there　was　nothing　in　the　house　to　eat。　　Her　hus…

band；　she　said；　had　gone　‘‘outside''　（to　Grand

Rapids）　to　get　some　flour；　and　had　not　returned

but　she　added　that　we　could　spend　the　night；　if

we　chose；　and　enjoy　shelter；　if　not　food。　　We　had

provisions　in　our　wagon；　so　we　wearily　entered；　after

my　brother　had　got　out　some　of　our　pork　and

opened　a　barrel　of　flour。　　With　this　help　the　woman

made　some　biscuits；　which　were　so　green　that　my

poor　mother　could　not　eat　them。　　She　had　admitted

to　us　that　the　one　thing　she　had　in　the　house　was

saleratus；　and　she　had　used　this　ingredient　with　an

unsparing　hand。　　When　the　meal　was　eaten　she

broke　the　further　news　that　there　were　no　beds。



‘‘The　old　woman　can　sleep　with　me；''　she　sug…

gested；　‘‘and　the　girls　can　sleep　on　the　floor。　　The

boys　will　have　to　go　to　the　barn。''

She　and　her　bed　were　not　especially　attractive；

and　mother　decided　to　lie　on　the　floor　with　us。　　We

had　taken　our　bedding　from　the　wagon；　and　we　slept

very　well；　but　though　she　was　usually　superior　to

small　annoyances；　I　think　my　mother　resented　being

called　an　‘‘old　woman。''　　She　must　have　felt　like

one　that　night；　but　she　was　only　about　forty…eight

years　of　age。



At　dawn　the　next　morning　we　resumed　our　jour…

ney；　and　every　day　after　that　we　were　able　to　cover

the　distance