the story of a pioneer-第12节

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for　me。　　Mary　A。　Livermore　came　to　Big　Rapids；

and　as　she　was　then　at　the　height　of　her　career；　the

entire　countryside　poured　in　to　hear　her。　　Far　back

in　the　crowded　hall　I　sat　alone　and　listened　to　her；

thrilled　by　the　lecture　and　tremulous　with　the　hope

of　meeting　the　lecturer。　　When　she　had　finished

speaking　I　joined　the　throng　that　surged　forward

from　the　body　of　the　hall；　and　as　I　reached　her　and

felt　the　grasp　of　her　friendly　hand　I　had　a　sudden

conviction　that　the　meeting　was　an　epoch　in　my　life。

I　was　right。　　Some　one　in　the　circle　around　us　told

her　that　I　wanted　to　preach；　and　that　I　was　meeting

tremendous　opposition。　　She　was　interested　at　once。　

She　looked　at　me　with　quickening　sympathy；　and

then；　suddenly　putting　an　arm　around　me；　drew　me

close　to　her　side。



‘‘My　dear；''　she　said；　quietly；　‘‘if　you　want　to

preach；　go　on　and　preach。　　Don't　let　anybody　stop

you。　　No　matter　what　people　say；　don't　let　them

stop　you！''



For　a　moment　I　was　too　overcome　to　answer　her。　

These　were　almost　my　first　encouraging　words；　and

the　morning　stars　singing　together　could　not　have

made　sweeter　music　for　my　ears。　　Before　I　could

recover　a　woman　within　hearing　spoke　up。



‘‘Oh；　Mrs。　Livermore；''　she　exclaimed；　‘‘don't　say

that　to　her！　　We're　all　trying　to　stop　her。　　Her　peo…

ple　are　wretched　over　the　whole　thing。　　And　don't

you　see　how　ill　she　is？　　She　has　one　foot　in　the　grave

and　the　other　almost　there！''



Mrs。　Livermore　turned　upon　me　a　long　and　deeply

thoughtful　look。　　‘‘Yes；''　she　said　at　last；　‘‘I　see　she

has。　　But　it　is　better　that　she　should　die　doing　the

thing　she　wants　to　do　than　that　she　should　die

because　she　can't　do　it。''



Her　words　were　a　tonic　which　restored　my　voice。　

‘‘So　they　think　I'm　going　to　die！''　I　cried。　　‘‘Well；

I'm　not！　　I'm　going　to　live　and　preach！''



I　have　always　felt　since　then　that　without　the

inspiration　of　Mrs。　Livermore's　encouragement　I

might　not　have　continued　my　fight。　　Her　sanction

was　a　shield；　however；　from　which　the　criticisms　of

the　world　fell　back。　　Fate's　more　friendly　interest

in　my　affairs　that　year　was　shown　by　the　fact　that

she　sent　Mrs。　Livermore　into　my　life　before　I　had

met　Anna　Dickinson。　　Miss　Dickinson　came　to　us

toward　spring　and　lectured　on　Joan　of　Arc。　　Never

before　or　since　have　I　been　more　deeply　moved　by　a

speaker。　　When　she　had　finished　her　address　I　made

my　happy　way　to　the　front　of　the　hall　with　the　others

who　wished　to　meet　the　distinguished　guest。　　It

was　our　local　manager　who　introduced　me；　and　he

said；　‘‘This　is　our　Anna　Shaw。　　She　is　going　to　be

a　lecturer；　too。''



I　looked　up　at　the　brilliant　Miss　Dickinson　with

the　trustfulness　of　youth　in　my　eyes。　　I　remem…

bered　Mrs。　Livermore　and　I　thought　all　great　wom…

en　were　like　her；　but　I　was　now　to　experience　a　bitter

disillusionment。　　Miss　Dickinson　barely　touched

the　tips　of　my　fingers　as　she　looked　indifferently

past　the　side　of　my　face。　　‘‘Ah；''　she　said；　icily；

and　turned　away。　　In　later　years　I　learned　how

impossible　it　is　for　a　public　speaker　to　leave　a

gracious　impression　on　every　life　that　for　a　moment

touches　her　own；　but　I　have　never　ceased　to　be

thankful　that　I　met　Mrs。　Livermore　before　I　met

Miss　Dickinson　at　the　crisis　in　my　career。



In　the　autumn　of　1873　I　entered　Albion　College；

in　Albion；　Michigan。　　I　was　twenty…five　years　of

age；　but　I　looked　much　youngerprobably　not　more

than　eighteen　to　the　casual　glance。　　Though　I　had

made　every　effort　to　save　money；　I　had　not　been

successful；　for　my　expenses　constantly　outran　my

little　income；　and　my　position　as　preacher　made　it

necessary　for　me　to　have　a　suitable　wardrobe。　

When　the　time　came　to　enter　college　I　had　exactly

eighteen　dollars　in　the　world；　and　I　started　for

Albion　with　this　amount　in　my　purse　and　without

the　slightest　notion　of　how　I　was　to　add　to　it。　　The

money　problem　so　pressed　upon　me；　in　fact；　that

when　I　reached　my　destination　at　midnight　and　dis…

covered　that　it　would　cost　fifty　cents　to　ride　from

the　station　to　the　college；　I　saved　that　amount　by

walking　the　entire　distance　on　the　railroad　tracks；

while　my　imagination　busied　itself　pleasantly　with

pictures　of　the　engine　that　might　be　thundering　upon

me　in　the　rear。　　I　had　chosen　Albion　because　Miss

Foot　had　been　educated　there；　and　I　was　encouraged

by　an　incident　that　happened　the　morning　after　my

arrival。　　I　was　on　the　campus；　walking　toward　the

main　building；　when　I　saw　a　big　copper　penny　lying

on　the　ground；　and；　on　picking　it　up；　I　discovered

that　it　bore　the　year　of　my　birth。　　That　seemed　a

good　omen；　and　it　was　emphatically　underlined　by

the　finding　of　two　exactly　similar　pennies　within　a

week。　　Though　there　have　been　days　since　then

when　I　was　sorely　tempted　to　spend　them；　I　have

those　three　pennies　still；　and　I　confess　to　a　certain

comfort　in　their　possession！



As　I　had　not　completed　my　high…school　course；

my　first　days　at　Albion　were　spent　in　strenuous　prep…

aration　for　the　entrance　examinations；　and　one　morn…

ing；　as　I　was　crossing　the　campus　with　a　History

of　the　United　States　tucked　coyly　under　my　arm；

I　met　the　president　of　the　college；　Dr。　Josclyn。　　He

stopped　for　a　word　of　greeting；　during　which　I　be…

trayed　the　fact　that　I　had　never　studied　United

States　history。　　Dr。　Josclyn　at　once　invited　me　into

his　office　with；　I　am　quite　sure；　the　purpose　of　ex…

plaining　as　kindly　as　he　could　that　my　preparation

for　college　was　insufficient。　　As　an　opening　to　the

subject　he　began　to　talk　of　history；　and　we　talked

and　talked　on；　while　unheeded　hours　were　born　and

died。　　We　discussed　the　history　of　the　United　States；

the　governments　of　the　world；　the　causes　which　led

to　the　influence　of　one　nation　on　another；　the　philo…

sophical　basis　of　the　different　national　movements

westward；　and　the　like。　　It　was　the　longest　and　by

far　the　most　interesting　talk　I　have　ever　had　with

a　highly　educated　man；　and　during　it　I　could　actually

feel　my　brain　expand。　　When　I　rose　to　go　President

Josclyn　stopped　me。



‘‘I　have　something　to　give　you；''　he　said；　and　he

wrote　a　few　words　on　a　slip　of　paper　and　handed

the　slip　to　me。　　When；　on　reaching　the　dormitory；

I　opened　it；　I　found　that　the　president　had　passed

me　in　the　history　of　the　entire　college　course！　　This；

moreover；　was　not　the　only　pleasant　result　of　our

interview；　for　within　a　few　weeks　President　and　Mrs。

Josclyn；　whose　daughter　had　recently　died；　invited

me　to　board　with　them；　and　I　made　my　home　with

them　during　my　first　year　at　Albion。



My　triumph　in　history　was　followed　by　the　swift

and　chastening　discovery　that　I　was　behind　my　as…

sociates　in　several　other　branches。　　Owing　to　my

father's　early　help；　I　was　well　up　in　mathematics；

but　I　had　much　to　learn　of　philosophy　and　the

languages；　and　to　these　I　devoted　many　midnight

candles。



Naturally；　I　soon　plunged　into　speaking；　and　my

first　public　speech　at　college　was　a　defense　of　Xan…

tippe。　　I　have　always　felt　that　the　poor　lady　was

greatly　abused；　and　that　Socrates　deserved　all　he

received　from　her；　and　more。　　I　was　glad　to　put

myself　on　record　as　her　champion；　and　my　fellow…

students　must　soon　have　felt　that　my　admiration

for　Xantippe　was　based　on　similarities　of　tempera…

ment；　for　within　a　few　months　I　was　leading　the　first

college　revolt　against　the　authority　of　the　men

students。



Albion　was　a　coeducational　institution；　and　the

brightest　jewels　in　its　crown　were　its　three　literary

societiesthe　first　composed　of　men　alone；　the　sec…

ond　of　women　alone；　and　the　third　of　men　and

women　together。　　Each　of　the　societies　made　friend…

ly　advances　to　new　students；　and　for　some　time　I

hesitated　on　the　brink　of　the　new　joys　they　offered；

uncertain　which　to　choose。　　A　representative　of　the

mixed　society；　who　was　putting　its　claims　before

me；　unconsciously　helped　me　to　make　up　my　mind。



‘‘Women；''　he　pompously　assured　me；　‘‘need　to　be

associated　with　men；　because　they　don't　know　how

to　manage　meetings。''



On　the　instant　the　needle　of　decision　swung　around

to　the　women's　society　and　remained　there；　fixed。



‘‘If　they　don't；''　I　told　the　pompous　young　man；

‘‘it's　high　time　they　learned。　　I　shall　join　the　women；

and　we'll　master　the　art。''



I　did　join　the　women's　society；　and　I　had　not　been

a　member　very　long　before　I　discovered　that　when

there　was　an　advantage　of　any　kind　to　be　secured

the　men　invariably　got　it。　　While　I　was　brooding

somberly　upon　this　wrong　an　opportunity　came　to

make　a　formal　and　effective　protest　against　the

men's　high…handed　methods。　　The　Quinquennial　re…

union　of　all　the　societies　was　about　to　be　held；　and

the　special　feature　of　this　festivity　was　always　an

oration。　　The　simple　method　of　selecting　the　orator

which　had　formerly　prevailed　had　been　for　the

young　men　to　decide　upon　the　speaker　and　then　an…

nounce　his　name　to　the　wo