the story of a pioneer-第10节

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ence｛sic｝　climbed　up　and　up。　　The　largest　amount　I

could　earn　at　teaching　was　six　dollars　a　week；　and

our　school　year　included　only　two　terms　of　thir…

teen　weeks　each。　　It　was　an　incessant　struggle　to

keep　our　land；　to　pay　our　taxes；　and　to　live。　　Cal…

ico　was　selling　at　fifty　cents　a　yard。　　Coffee　was

one　dollar　a　pound。　　There　were　no　men　left　to

grind　our　corn；　to　get　in　our　crops；　or　to　care　for

our　live　stock；　and　all　around　us　we　saw　our

struggle　reflected　in　the　lives　of　our　neighbors。



At　long　intervals　word　came　to　us　of　battles　in

which　my　father's　regimentthe　Tenth　Michigan

Cavalry　Volunteersor　those　of　my　brothers　were

engaged；　and　then　longer　intervals　followed　in　which

we　heard　no　news。　　After　Eleanor's　death　my

brother　Tom　was　wounded；　and　for　months　we　lived

in　terror　of　worse　tidings；　but　he　finally　recovered。　

I　was　walking　seven　and　eight　miles　a　day；　and　doing

extra　work　before　and　after　school　hours；　and　my

health　began　to　fail。　　Those　were　years　I　do　not

like　to　look　back　uponyears　in　which　life　had　de…

generated　into　a　treadmill　whose　monotony　was

broken　only　by　the　grim　messages　from　the　front。　

My　sister　Mary　married　and　went　to　Big　Rapids　to

live。　　I　had　no　time　to　dream　my　dream；　but　the　star

of　my　one　purpose　still　glowed　in　my　dark　horizon。　

It　seemed　that　nothing　short　of　a　miracle　could　lift

my　feet　from　their　plodding　way　and　set　them　on　the

wider　path　toward　which　my　eyes　were　turned；　but

I　never　lost　faith　that　in　some　manner　the　miracle

would　come　to　pass。　　As　certainly　as　I　have　ever

known　anything；　I　KNEW　that　I　was　going　to　college！





III



HIGH…SCHOOL　AND　COLLEGE　DAYS



The　end　of　the　Civil　War　brought　freedom　to

me；　too。　　When　peace　was　declared　my　father

and　brothers　returned　to　the　claim　in　the　wilderness

which　we　women　of　the　family　had　labored　so　des…

perately　to　hold　while　they　were　gone。　　To　us；　as　to

others；　the　final　years　of　the　war　had　brought　many

changes。　　My　sister　Eleanor's　place　was　empty。　

Mary；　as　I　have　said；　had　married　and　gone　to　live　in

Big　Rapids；　and　my　mother　and　I　were　alone　with　my

brother　Harry；　now　a　boy　of　fourteen。　　After　the

return　of　our　men　it　was　no　longer　necessary　to　de…

vote　every　penny　of　my　earnings　to　the　maintenance

of　our　home。　　For　the　first　time　I　could　begin　to

save　a　portion　of　my　income　toward　the　fulfilment

of　my　college　dream；　but　even　yet　there　was　a　long；

arid　stretch　ahead　of　me　before　the　college　doors

came　even　distantly　into　sight。



The　largest　salary　I　could　earn　by　teaching　in　our

Northern　woods　was　one　hundred　and　fifty…six　dollars

a　year；　for　two　terms　of　thirteen　weeks　each；　and

from　this；　of　course；　I　had　to　deduct　the　cost　of　my

board　and　clothingthe　sole　expenditure　I　allowed

myself。　　The　dollars　for　an　education　accumulated

very；　very　slowly；　until　at　last；　in　desperation；　weary

of　seeing　the　years　of　my　youth　rush　past；　bearing

my　hopes　with　them；　I　took　a　sudden　and　radical

step。　　I　gave　up　teaching；　left　our　cabin　in　the

woods；　and　went　to　Big　Rapids　to　live　with　my　sister

Mary；　who　had　married　a　successful　man　and　who

generously　offered　me　a　home。　　There；　I　had　de…

cided；　I　would　learn　a　trade　of　some　kind；　of　any

kind；　it　did　not　greatly　matter　what　it　was。　　The

sole　essential　was　that　it　should　be　a　money…making

trade；　offering　wages　which　would　make　it　possible

to　add　more　rapidly　to　my　savings。　　In　those　days；

almost　fifty　years　ago；　and　in　a　small　pioneer　town；

the　fields　open　to　women　were　few　and　unfruitful。　

The　needle　at　once　presented　itself；　but　at　first　I

turned　with　loathing　from　it。　　I　would　have　pre…

ferred　the　digging　of　ditches　or　the　shoveling　of　coal；

but　the　needle　alone　persistently　pointed　out　my

way；　and　I　was　finally　forced　to　take　it。



Fate；　however；　as　if　weary　at　last　of　seeing　me

between　her　paws；　suddenly　let　me　escape。　　Before

I　had　been　working　a　month　at　my　uncongenial

trade　Big　Rapids　was　favored　by　a　visit　from　a

Universalist　woman　minister；　the　Reverend　Marianna

Thompson；　who　came　there　to　preach。　　Her　ser…

mon　was　delivered　on　Sunday　morning；　and　I　was；　I

think；　almost　the　earliest　arrival　of　the　great　con…

gregation　which　filled　the　church。　　It　was　a　wonder…

ful　moment　when　I　saw　my　first　woman　minister

enter　her　pulpit；　and　as　I　listened　to　her　sermon；

thrilled　to　the　soul；　all　my　early　aspirations　to　be…

come　a　minister　myself　stirred　in　me　with　cumulative

force。　　After　the　services　I　hung　for　a　time　on　the

fringe　of　the　group　that　surrounded　her；　and　at　last；

when　she　was　alone　and　about　to　leave；　I　found

courage　to　introduce　myself　and　pour　forth　the　tale

of　my　ambition。　　Her　advice　was　as　prompt　as　if

she　had　studied　my　problem　for　years。



‘‘My　child；''　she　said；　‘‘give　up　your　foolish　idea

of　learning　a　trade；　and　go　to　school。　　You　can't　do

anything　until　you　have　an　education。　　Get　it；　and

get　it　NOW。''



Her　suggestion　was　much　to　my　liking；　and　I　paid

her　the　compliment　of　acting　on　it　promptly；　for

the　next　morning　I　entered　the　Big　Rapids　High

School；　which　was　also　a　preparatory　school　for　col…

lege。　　There　I　would　study；　I　determined；　as　long

as　my　money　held　out；　and　with　the　optimism　of

youth　I　succeeded　in　confining　my　imagination　to

this　side　of　that　crisis。　　My　home；　thanks　to　Mary；

was　assured；　the　wardrobe　I　had　brought　from　the

woods　covered　me　sufficiently；　to　one　who　had

walked　five　and　six　miles　a　day　for　years；　walking

to　school　held　no　discomfort；　and　as　for　pleasure；

I　found　it；　like　a　heroine　of　fiction；　in　my　studies。　

For　the　first　time　life　was　smiling　at　me；　and　with

all　my　young　heart　I　smiled　back。



The　preceptress　of　the　high　school　was　Lucy

Foot；　a　college　graduate　and　a　remarkable　woman。　

I　had　heard　much　of　her　sympathy　and　understand…

ing；　and　on　the　evening　following　my　first　day　in

school　I　went　to　her　and　repeated　the　confidences

I　had　reposed　in　the　Reverend　Marianna　Thompson。　

My　trust　in　her　was　justified。　　She　took　an　immedi…

ate　interest　in　me；　and　proved　it　at　once　by　putting

me　into　the　speaking　and　debating　classes；　where　I

was　given　every　opportunity　to　hold　forth　to　help…

less　classmates　when　the　spirit　of　eloquence　moved

me。



As　an　aid　to　public　speaking　I　was　taught　to　‘‘elo…

cute；''　and　I　remember　in　every　mournful　detail

the　occasion　on　which　I　gave　my　first　recitation。　

We　were　having　our　monthly　‘‘public　exhibition

night；''　and　the　audience　included　not　only　my　class…

mates；　but　their　parents　and　friends　as　well。　　The

selection　I　intended　to　recite　was　a　poem　entitled

‘‘No　Sects　in　Heaven；''　but　when　I　faced　my　au…

dience　I　was　so　appalled　by　its　size　and　by　the　sud…

den　realization　of　my　own　temerity　that　I　fainted

during　the　delivery　of　the　first　verse。　　Sympathetic

classmates　carried　me　into　an　anteroom　and　revived

me；　after　which　they　naturally　assumed　that　the

entertainment　I　furnished　was　over　for　the　evening。　

I；　however；　felt　that　if　I　let　that　failure　stand　against

me　I　could　never　afterward　speak　in　public；　and

within　ten　minutes；　notwithstanding　the　protests

of　my　friends；　I　was　back　in　the　hall　and　beginning

my　recitation　a　second　time。　　The　audience　gave

me　its　eager　attention。　　Possibly　it　hoped　to　see　me

topple　off　the　platform　again；　but　nothing　of　the

sort　occurred。　　I　went　through　the　recitation　with

self…possession　and　received　some　friendly　applause　at

the　end。　　Strangely　enough；　those　first　sensations　of

‘‘stage　fright''　have　been　experienced；　in　a　lesser　de…

gree；　in　connection　with　each　of　the　thousands　of

public　speeches　I　have　made　since　that　time。　　I

have　never　again　gone　so　far　as　to　faint　in　the

presence　of　an　audience；　but　I　have　invariably

walked　out　on　the　platform　feeling　the　sinking　sen…

sation　at　the　pit　of　the　stomach；　the　weakness　of　the

knees；　that　I　felt　in　the　hour　of　my　debut。　　Now；

however；　the　nervousness　passes　after　a　moment

or　two。



From　that　night　Miss　Foot　lost　no　opportunity　of

putting　me　into　the　foreground　of　our　school　affairs。　

I　took　part　in　all　our　debates；　recited　yards　of　poe…

try　to　any　audience　we　could　attract；　and　even　shone

mildly　in　our　amateur　theatricals。　　It　was　probably

owing　to　all　this　activity　that　I　attracted　the　in…

terest　of　the　presiding　elder　of　our　districtDr。

Peck；　a　man　of　progressive　ideas。　　There　was　at

that　time　a　movement　on　foot　to　license　women　to

preach　in　the　Methodist　Church；　and　Dr。　Peck　was

ambitious　to　be　the　first　presiding　elder　to　have　a

woman　ordained　for　the　Methodist　ministry。　　He

had　urged　Miss　Foot　to　be　this　pioneer；　but　her

ambitions　did　not　turn　in　that　direction。　　Though

she　was　a　very　devout　Methodist；　she　had　no　wish

to　be　the　shepherd　of　a　religious　flock。　　She　loved

her　school…work；　and　asked　nothing　better　than　to

remain　in　it。　　Gently　but　persistently　she　directed

the　attent