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the pages of Thoreau or of any other man's book。



〃I stayed on there a week。 It was on her invitation。 She

promised to fit me out with dogs and sleds and with Indians

that would put me across the best pass of the Rockies in five

hundred miles。 Her fly was pitched apart from the others; on

the high bank by the river; and a couple of Indian girls did

her cooking for her and the camp work。 And so we talked and

talked; while the first snow fell and continued to fall and

make a surface for my sleds。 And this was her story。



〃She was frontier…born; of poor settlers; and you know what

that meanswork; work; always work; work in plenty and without

end。



〃'I never seen the glory of the world;' she said。 'I had no

time。 I knew it was right out there; anywhere; all around the

cabin; but there was always the bread to set; the scrubbin' and

the washin' and the work that was never done。 I used to be

plumb sick at times; jes' to get out into it all; especially in

the spring when the songs of the birds drove me most clean

crazy。 I wanted to run out through the long pasture grass;

wetting my legs with the dew of it; and to climb the rail

fence; and keep on through the timber and up and up over the

divide so as to get a look around。 Oh; I had all kinds of

hankeringsto follow up the canyon beds and slosh around from

pool to pool; making friends with the water…dogs and the

speckly trout; to peep on the sly and watch the squirrels and

rabbits and small furry things and see what they was doing and

learn the secrets of their ways。 Seemed to me; if I had time; I

could crawl among the flowers; and; if I was good and quiet;

catch them whispering with themselves; telling all kinds of

wise things that mere humans never know。'〃



Trefethan paused to see that his glass had been refilled。



〃Another time she said: 'I wanted to run nights like a wild

thing; just to run through the moonshine and under the stars;

to run white and naked in the darkness that I knew must feel

like cool velvet; and to run and run and keep on running。 One

evening; plumb tuckered outit had been a dreadful hard hot

day; and the bread wouldn't raise and the churning had gone

wrong; and I was all irritated and jerkywell; that evening I

made mention to dad of this wanting to run of mine。 He looked

at me curious…some and a bit scared。 And then he gave me two

pills to take。 Said to go to bed and get a good sleep and I'd

be all hunky…dory in the morning。 So I never mentioned my

hankerings to him; or any one any more。'



〃The mountain home broke upstarved out; I imagineand the

family came to Seattle to live。 There she worked in a

factorylong hours; you know; and all the rest; deadly work。

And after a year of that she became waitress in a cheap

restauranthash…slinger; she called it。 〃She said to me once;

'Romance I guess was what I wanted。 But there wan't no romance

floating around in dishpans and washtubs; or in factories and

hash…joints。'



〃When she was eighteen she marrieda man who was going up to

Juneau to start a restaurant。 He had a few dollars saved; and

appeared prosperous。 She didn't love himshe was emphatic

about that; but she was all tired out; and she wanted to get

away from the unending drudgery。 Besides; Juneau was in Alaska;

and her yearning took the form of a desire to see that

wonderland。 But little she saw of it。 He started the

restaurant; a little cheap one; and she quickly learned what he

had married her for。。。。。 to save paying wages。 She came pretty

close to running the joint and doing all the work from waiting

to dishwashing。 She cooked most of the time as well。 And she

had four years of it。



〃Can't you picture her; this wild woods creature; quick with

every old primitive instinct; yearning for the free open; and

mowed up in a vile little hash…joint and toiling and moiling

for four mortal years?



〃'There was no meaning in anything;' she said。 'What was it all

about! Why was I born! Was that all the meaning of lifejust

to work and work and be always tired!to go to bed tired and

to wake up tired; with every day like every other day unless it

was harder?' She had heard talk of immortal life from the

gospel sharps; she said; but she could not reckon that what she

was doin' was a likely preparation for her immortality。



〃But she still had her dreams; though more rarely。 She had read

a few bookswhat; it is pretty hard to imagine; Seaside

Library novels most likely; yet they had been food for fancy。

'Sometimes;' she said; 'when I was that dizzy from the heat of

the cooking that if I didn't take a breath of fresh air I'd

faint; I'd stick my head out of the kitchen window; and close

my eyes and see most wonderful things。 All of a sudden I'd be

traveling down a country road; and everything clean and quiet;

no dust; no dirt; just streams ripplin' down sweet meadows; and

lambs playing; breezes blowing the breath of flowers; and soft

sunshine over everything; and lovely cows lazying knee…deep in

quiet pools; and young girls bathing in a curve of stream all

white and slim and naturaland I'd know I was in Arcady。 I'd

read about that country once; in a book。 And maybe knights; all

flashing in the sun; would come riding around a bend in the

road; or a lady on a milk…white mare; and in the distance I

could see the towers of a castle rising; or I just knew; on the

next turn; that I'd come upon some palace; all white and airy

and fairy…like; with fountains playing; and flowers all over

everything; and peacocks on the lawn。。。。。 and then I'd open my

eyes; and the heat of the cooking range would strike on me; and

I'd hear Jake sayin'he was my husbandI'd hear Jake sayin';

〃Why ain't you served them beans? Think I can wait here all

day!〃 Romance!I reckon the nearest I ever come to it was when

a drunken Armenian cook got the snakes and tried to cut my

throat with a potato knife and I got my arm burned on the stove

before I could lay him out with the potato stomper。



〃'I wanted easy ways; and lovely things; and Romance and all

that; but it just seemed I had no luck nohow and was only and

expressly born for cooking and dishwashing。 There was a wild

crowd in Juneau them days; but I looked at the other women; and

their way of life didn't excite me。 I reckon I wanted to be

clean。 I don't know why; I just wanted to; I guess; and I

reckoned I might as well die dishwashing as die their way。〃



Trefethan halted in his tale for a moment; completing to

himself some thread of thought。



〃And this is the woman I met up there in the Arctic; running a

tribe of wild Indians and a few thousand square miles of

hunting territory。 And it happened; simply enough; though; for

that matter; she might have lived and died among the pots and

pans。 But 'Came the whisper; came the vision。' That was all she

needed; and she got it。



〃'I woke up one day;' she said。 'Just happened on it in a scrap

of newspaper。 I remember every word of it; and I can give it to

you。' And then she quoted Thoreau's Cry of the Human:



〃'The young pines springing up; in the corn field from year to

year are to me a refreshing fact。 We talk of civilizing the

Indian; but that is not the name for his improvement。 By the

wary independence and aloofness of his dim forest life he

preserves his intercourse with his native gods and is admitted

from time to time to a rare and peculiar society with nature。

He has glances of starry recognition; to which our saloons are

strangers。 The steady illumination of his qenius; dim only

because distant; is like the faint but satisfying light of the

stars compared with the dazzling but ineffectual and

short…lived blaze of candles。 The Society Islanders had their

day…born gods; but they were not supposed to be of equal

antiquity with the。。。。。 night…born gods。'



〃That's what she did; repeated it word for word; and I forgot

the tang; for it was solemn; a declaration of religionpagan;

if you will; and clothed in the living garmenture of herself。



〃'And the rest of it was torn away;' she added; a great

emptiness in her voice。 'It was only a scrap of newspaper。 But

that Thoreau was a wise man。 I wish I knew more about him。' She

stopped a moment; and I swear her face was ineffably holy as

she said; 'I could have made him a good wife。'



〃And then she went on。 'I knew right away; as soon as I read

that; what was the matter with me。 I was a night…born。 I; who

had lived all my life with the day…born; was a night…born。 That

was why I had never been satisfied with cooking and

dishwashing; that was why I had hankered to run naked in the

moonlight。 And I knew that this dirty little Juneau hash…joint

was no place for me。 And right there and then I said; 〃I quit。〃

I packed up my few rags of clothes; and started。 Jake saw me

and tried to stop me。



〃'What you doing?〃 he says。



〃'Divorcin' you and me;' I says。 'I'm headin' for tall timber

and where I bel

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