the fortunes of oliver horn-第20节

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said　to　himself　with　a　heavy　sigh。　Then　the　calm　eyes　of　his　mother　had　looked　into　his　again；　and　he　had　felt　the　pressure　of　the　soft　hand　and　heard　the　tones　of　her　voice：

〃You　may　have　many　discouragements；　my　son；　and　will　often　be　ready　to　faint　by　the　way；　but　stick　to　it　and　you　will　win。〃

His　bitterness　had　been　but　momentary；　and　he　had　soon　pulled　himself　together；　but　his　every　resource　　seemed　exhausted　now。　He　had　counted　so　on　the　situationthat　of　a　shipping…clerk　in　a　dry…　goods　storepromised　him　because　of　a　letter　that　he　carried　from　Amos　Cobb's　friend。　But　at　the　last　moment　the　former　clerk；　who　had　been　laid　off　because　　of　sickness；　had　been　taken　back；　and　so　the　weary　search　for　work　must　begin　again。

And　yet　with　everything　against　him　Oliver　had　no　thought　of　giving　up　the　struggle。　Even　Amos　Cobb　would　have　been　proud　of　him　could　he　have　seen　the　dogged　tenacity　with　which　he　clung　to　his　purposea　tenacity　due　to　his　buoyant；　happy　temperament；　or　to　his　devotion　to　his　mother's　wishes；　or　（and　this　is　more　than　probable）　to　some　drops　of　blood；　perhaps；　that　had　reached　his　own　through　his　mother's　veinsthe　blood　of　that　Major　with　the　blue　and　buff　coat；　whose　portrait　hung　in　the　dining…room　at　home；　and　who　in　the　early　days　had　braved　the　flood　at　Trenton　side　by　side　with　the　Hero　of　the　Bronze　Horse　now　overlooking　the　bench　on　which　Oliver　sat；　or　it　may　be　of　that　other　ancestor　in　the　queue　whose　portrait　hung　over　the　mantel　of　the　club　and　who　had　served　his　State　with　distinction　in　his　day。

Whatever　the　causes　of　these　several　effects；　the　one　dominating　power　which　now　controlled　him　was　his　veneration　for　his　mother's　name　and　honor。　For　on　the　night　succeeding　Amos　Cobb's　visit　after　she　had　dropped　upon　her　knees　and　poured　out　her　heart　in　prayer　she　had　gone　into　Oliver's　bedroom；　and　shutting　the　door　had　told　him　of　the　mortgage；　of　his　father's　embarrassment；　and　the　danger　they　suffered　of　losing　the　farmtheir　only　hope　for　their　old　ageunless　success　crowned　Richard's　inventions。　With　his　hand　fast　in　hers　she　had　given　him　in　exact　detail　all　that　she　had　done　to　ward　off　this　calamity；　recounting；　word　by　word；　what　she　had　said　to　the　Colonel；　lowering　her　voice　almost　to　a　whisper　as　she　spoke　of　the　solemn　promise　she　had　made　himinvolving　her　own　and　her　husband's　honorand　the　lengths　to　which　she　was　prepared　to　go　to　keep　her　obligations　to　the　bank。

Then；　her　hand　still　clasping　his；　the　two　sitting　side　by　side　on　his　bed；　his　wondering；　startled　eyes　looking　into　hersfor　this　world　of　anxiety　was　an　unknown　world　to　himshe　had　by　slow　stages　made　him　realize　how　necessary　it　was　that　he；　their　only　son；　and　their　sole　dependence；　should　begin　at　once　to　earn　his　daily　bread；　not　only　on　his　own　account　but　on　hers　and　his　father's。　In　her　tenderness　she　had　not　told　him　that　the　real　reason　was　his　instability　　of　purpose；　fearing　to　wound　his　pride；　she　had　put　it　solely　on　the　ground　of　his　settling　down　to　some　work。

〃It　is　the　law　of　nature；　my　son；〃　she　had　added。　〃Everything　that　lives　must　WORK　to　live。　You　have　only　to　watch　the　birds　out　here　in　the　Square　to　convince　　you　of　that。　Notice　them　to…morrow；　when　you　go　out。　See　how　busy　they　are；　see　how　long　it　takes　for　any　one　of　them　to　get　a　meal。　You　are　old　enough　now　to　begin　to　earn　your　own　bread；　and　you　must　begin　at　once；　Ollie。　Your　father　can　no　longer　help　you。　I　had　hoped　your　profession　would　do　this　for　you；　but　that　is　not　to　be　thought　of　now。〃

Oliver；　at　first；　had　been　stunned　by　it　all。　He　had　never　before　given　the　practical　side　of　life　a　single　thought。　Everything　had　gone　along　smoothly　from　his　earliest　remembrance。　His　father's　house　had　been　his　home　and　his　protection；　his　room　with　its　little　bed　and　pretty　hangings　and　all　its　comforts　a　room　cared　for　like　a　girl'shad　always　been　open　to　him。　He　had　never　once　asked　himself　how　these　things　came　about；　nor　why　they　continued。　These　revelations　of　his　mother's　therefore　were　like　the　sudden　opening　of　a　door　covering　a　vault　over　which　he　had　walked　unconsciously　and　which　now；　for　the　first　time；　he　saw　yawning　beneath　him。

〃Poor　daddy；〃　were　his　first　words。　〃I　never　knew　a　thing　about　his　troubles；　he　seems　always　so　happy　and　so　gentle。　I　am　so　sorrydear　daddy　dear　dad〃　he　kept　repeating。

And　then　as　she　spoke　there　flashed　into　his　mind　the　thought　of　his　own　hopes。　They　were　shattered　now。　He　knew　that　the　art　career　was　dead　for　him；　and　that　all　his　dreams　in　that　direction　were　over。

He　was　about　to　tell　her　this；　but　he　stopped　before　　the　words　were　formed。　He　would　not　add　his　own　burden　to　her　sorrow。　No；　he　would　bear　it　alone。　He　would　tell　Sue；　but　he　would　not　tell　his　mother。　Next　there　welled　up　in　his　heart　a　desire　to　help　this　mother　whom　he　idolized；　and　this　father　who　represented　to　him　all　that　was　kind　and　true。

〃What　can　I　do？　Where　can　I　go；　dearie？〃　he　cried　with　sudden　resolve。　〃Even　if　I　am　to　work　with　my　hands　I　am　ready　to　do　it；　but　it　must　be　away　from　here。　I　could　not　do　it　here　at　home　with　everybody　looking　on；　no；　not　here！　not　here！〃

This　victory　gained；　the　mother　with　infinite　tact；　little　by　little；　unfolded　to　the　son　the　things　she　had　planned。　Finally　with　her　arms　about　his　neck；　smoothing　his　cheek　with　her　hands　she　told　him　of　Amos　Cobb's　advice　and　of　his　offer；　adding：　〃He　will　give　you　a　letter　to　his　friend　who　lives　at　Haverstraw　near　New　York；　my　boy；　with　whom　you　can　stay　until　you　get　the　situation　you　want。〃

The　very　impracticability　of　this　scheme　did　not　weigh　with　her。　She　did　not　see　how　almost　hopeless　would　be　the　task　of　finding　employment　in　an　unknown　　city。　Nor　did　the　length　of　time　her　son　might　be　a　burden　on　a　total　stranger　make　any　difference　　in　her　plans。　Her　own　home　had　always　been　open　to　the　friends　of　her　friends；　and　for　any　length　of　time；　and　her　inborn　sense　of　hospitality　made　it　impossible　for　her　to　understand　any　other　conditions。　　Then　again　she　said　to　herself：　〃Mr。　Cobb　is　a　thoroughly　practical　man；　and　a　very　kind　one。　His　friend　will　welcome　Oliver；　or　he　would　not　have　allowed　my　son　to　go。〃　She　had　repeated；　however；　no　word　of　the　Vermonter's　advice　〃to　chuck　the　boy　out　neck　and　heels　into　the　world　and　let　him　shift　for　himself；〃　although　the　very　Spartan　quality　of　the　suggestion；　in　spite　of　its　brusqueness；　had　greatly　pleased　her。　She　could　not　but　recognize　that　Amos　understood。　She　would　have　faced　the　situation　herself　if　she　had　been　in　her　son's　place；　she　said　so　to　herself。　And　she　hoped；　too；　that　Oliver　would　face　it　as　bravely　when　the　time　came。

As　for　the　temptations　that　might　assail　her　boy　in　the　great　city；　she　never　gave　them　a　thought。　Neither　the　love　of　drink　nor　the　love　of　play　ran　in　her　own　or　Richard's　veinsnot　for　generations。　back。　〃One　test　of　a　gentleman；　my　son；〃　Richard　always　said；　〃lies　in　the　way　in　which　he　controls　his　appetitesin　the　way　he　regards　his　meat　and　drink。　Both　are　foods　for　the　mind　as　well　as　for　the　body；　and　must　be　used　as　such。　Gluttons　and　drunkards　should　he　classed　together。〃　No；　her　boy's　heart　might　lead　him　astray；　but　not　his　appetites；　and　never　his　passions。　She　was　as　sure　of　that　as　she　was　of　his　love。

As　she　talked　on；　Oliver's　mind；　yielding　to　her　stronger　will　as　clay　does　to　a　sculptor's　hand；　began　　to　take　shape。　What　at　first　had　looked　like　a　hardship　now　began　to　have　an　attractive　side。　Perhaps　　the　art　career　need　not　be　wholly　given　up。　Perhaps；　　too；　there　was　a　better　field　for　him　in　New　York　than　hereold　Mr。　Crocker　had　always　told　him　this。　Then；　too；　there　was　something　of　fascination　　after　all；　in　going　out　alone　like　a　knight…errant　to　conquer　the　world。　And　in　that　great　Northern　city；　too；　with　its　rush　and　whirl　and　all　that　it　held　for　him　of　mystery！　How　many　times　had　Mr。　Crocker　　talked　to　him　by　the　hour　of　its　delights。　And　Ellicott's　　chair！　Yes；　he　could　get　rid　of　that。　And　Sue？　Sue　would　waitshe　had　promised　him　she　would；　no；　there　was　no　doubt　about　Sue！　She　would　love　him　all　the　better　if　he　fought　his　battle　alone。　Only　the　day　before　she　had　told　him　of　the　wonderful　feats　of　the　White　Knight；　that　the　new　English　poet　had　just　written　about　and　that　everybody　in　Kennedy　Square　was　now　reading。

Above　all　there　was　the　delight　of　another　sensation　the　sensation　of　a　new　move。　This　really　pleased　him　best。　He　was　apparently　listening　to　his　mother　when　these　thoughts　took　possession　of　him；　for　his　eyes　were　still　fixed　on　hers；　but　he　heard　only　a　word　now　and　then。　It　was　his　imagination　that　swayed　him　now；　not　his　will　nor　his　judgment。　He　would　have　his　own　adventures　in　the　great　city　and　see　the　world　as　Mr。　Crocker　had　done；　he　said　to　himself。

〃Yes；　dearie；　I'll　go；〃　he　answered　quickly。　〃Don't　talk　any　more　about　it。　I'll　do　just　as　you　want　me　to；　and　I'll　go　anywhere　you　say。　But　about　the　money　for　my　expenses？　Can　father　give　it　to　me？〃　he　asked　suddenly；　a　shade　of　anxiety　crossing　his　face。

〃We　won't　ask　your　father；　Ollie；〃　she　said；　drawing　　him　closer　to　her。　She　knew　he　would　yield　to　her　wishes；　and　she　loved　him　the　better　for　it；　if　that　were　possib