the queen of hearts-第18节

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behind　mea　man　came　round　quickly　to　my　side；　snatched　me　away
from　the　girl；　and；　catching　me　up　in　his　arms　without　a　word；
covered　my　face　with　kisses。　I　knew　he　was　crying；　because　my
cheeks　were　instantly　wet　with　his　tears；　but　it　was　too　dark　for
me　to　see　who　he　was；　or　even　how　he　was　dressed。　He　did　not；　I
should　think；　hold　me　half　a　minute　in　his　arms。　The　housemaid
screamed　for　help。　I　was　put　down　gently　on　the　sand；　and　the
strange　man　instantly　disappeared　in　the　darkness。

When　this　extraordinary　adventure　was　related　to　my　aunt；　she
seemed　at　first　merely　bewildered　at　hearing　of　it；　but　in　a
moment　more　there　came　a　change　over　her　face；　as　if　she　had
suddenly　recollected　or　thought　of　something。　She　turned　deadly
pale；　and　said；　in　a　hurried　way；　very　unusual　with　her：

〃Never　mind；　don't　talk　about　it　any　more。　It　was　only　a
mischievous　trick　to　frighten　you；　I　dare　say。　Forget　all　about
it；　my　dearforget　all　about　it。〃

It　was　easier　to　give　this　advice　than　to　make　me　follow　it。　For
many　nights　after；　I　thought　of　nothing　but　the　strange　man　who
had　kissed　me　and　cried　over　me。

Who　could　he　be？　Somebody　who　loved　me　very　much；　and　who　was
very　sorry。　My　childish　logic　carried　me　to　that　length。　But　when
I　tried　to　think　over　all　the　grown…up　gentlemen　who　loved　me
very　much；　I　could　never　get　on；　to　my　own　satisfaction；　beyond
my　father　and　my　Uncle　George。

CHAPTER　II。

I　was　taken　home　on　the　appointed　day　to　suffer　the　triala　hard
one　even　at　my　tender　yearsof　witnessing　my　mother's　passionate
grief　and　my　father's　mute　despair。　I　remember　that　the　scene　of
our　first　meeting　after　Caroline's　death　was　wisely　and
considerately　shortened　by　my　aunt；　who　took　me　out　of　the　room。
She　seemed　to　have　a　confused　desire　to　keep　me　from　leaving　her
after　the　door　had　closed　behind　us；　but　I　broke　away　and　ran
downstairs　to　the　surgery；　to　go　and　cry　for　my　lost　playmate
with　the　sharer　of　all　our　games；　Uncle　George。

I　opened　the　surgery　door　and　could　see　nobody。　I　dried　my　tears
and　looked　all　round　the　roomit　was　empty。　I　ran　upstairs　again
to　Uncle　George's　garret　bedroomhe　was　not　there；　his　cheap
hairbrush　and　old　cast…off　razor…case　that　had　belonged　to　my
grandfather　were　not　on　the　dressing…table。　Had　he　got　some　other
bedroom？　I　went　out　on　the　landing　and　called　softly；　with　an
unaccountable　terror　and　sinking　at　my　heart：

〃Uncle　George！〃

Nobody　answered；　but　my　aunt　came　hastily　up　the　garret　stairs。

〃Hush！〃　she　said。　〃You　must　never　call　that　name　out　here　again！〃

She　stopped　suddenly；　and　looked　as　if　her　own　words　had
frightened　her。

〃Is　Uncle　George　dead？〃　I　asked。　My　aunt　turned　red　and　pale；　and
stammered。

I　did　not　wait　to　hear　what　she　said。　I　brushed　past　her；　down
the　stairs。　My　heart　was　burstingmy　flesh　felt　cold。　I　ran
breathlessly　and　recklessly　into　the　room　where　my　father　and
mother　had　received　me。　They　were　both　sitting　there　still。　I　ran
up　to　them；　wringing　my　hands；　and　crying　out　in　a　passion　of
tears：

〃Is　Uncle　George　dead？〃

My　mother　gave　a　scream　that　terrified　me　into　instant　silence
and　stillness。　My　father　looked　at　her　for　a　moment；　rang　the
bell　that　summoned　the　maid；　then　seized　me　roughly　by　the　arm
and　dragged　me　out　of　the　room。

He　took　me　down　into　the　study；　seated　himself　in　his　accustomed
chair；　and　put　me　before　him　between　his　knees。　His　lips　were
awfully　white；　and　I　felt　his　two　hands；　as　they　grasped　my
shoulders；　shaking　violently。

〃You　are　never　to　mention　the　name　of　Uncle　George　again；〃　he
said；　in　a　quick；　angry；　trembling　whisper。　〃Never　to　me；　never
to　your　mother；　never　to　your　aunt；　never　to　anybody　in　this
world！　Nevernevernever！〃

The　repetition　of　the　word　terrified　me　even　more　than　the
suppressed　vehemence　with　which　he　spoke。　He　saw　that　I　was
frightened；　and　softened　his　manner　a　little　before　he　went　on。

〃You　will　never　see　Uncle　George　again；〃　he　said。　〃Your　mother
and　I　love　you　dearly；　but　if　you　forget　what　I　have　told　you；
you　will　be　sent　away　from　home。　Never　speak　that　name
againmind；　never！　Now　kiss　me；　and　go　away。〃

How　his　lips　trembledand　oh；　how　cold　they　felt　on　mine！

I　shrunk　out　of　the　room　the　moment　he　had　kissed　me；　and　went
and　hid　myself　in　the　garden。

〃Uncle　George　is　gone。　I　am　never　to　see　him　any　more；　I　am　never
to　speak　of　him　again〃those　were　the　words　I　repeated　to
myself；　with　indescribable　terror　and　confusion；　the　moment　I　was
alone。　There　was　something　unspeakably　horrible　to　my　young　mind
in　this　mystery　which　I　was　commanded　always　to　respect；　and
which；　so　far　as　I　then　knew；　I　could　never　hope　to　see　revealed。
My　father；　my　mother；　my　aunt；　all　appeared　to　be　separated　from
me　now　by　some　impassable　barrier。　Home　seemed　home　no　longer
with　Caroline　dead；　Uncle　George　gone；　and　a　forbidden　subject　of
talk　perpetually　and　mysteriously　interposing　between　my　parents
and　me。

Though　I　never　infringed　the　command　my　father　had　given　me　in
his　study　（his　words　and　looks；　and　that　dreadful　scream　of　my
mother's；　which　seemed　to　be　still　ringing　in　my　ears；　were　more
than　enough　to　insure　my　obedience）；　I　also　never　lost　the　secret
desire　to　penetrate　the　darkness　which　clouded　over　the　fate　of
Uncle　George。

For　two　years　I　remained　at　home　and　discovered　nothing。　If　I
asked　the　servants　about　my　uncle；　they　could　only　tell　me　that
one　morning　he　disappeared　from　the　house。　Of　the　members　of　my
father's　family　I　could　make　no　inquiries。　They　lived　far　away；
and　never　came　to　see　us；　and　the　idea　of　writing　to　them；　at　my
age　and　in　my　position；　was　out　of　the　question。　My　aunt　was　as
unapproachably　silent　as　my　father　and　mother；　but　I　never　forgot
how　her　face　had　altered　when　she　reflected　for　a　moment　after
hearing　of　my　extraordinary　adventure　while　going　home　with　the
servant　over　the　sands　at　night。　The　more　I　thought　of　that
change　of　countenance　in　connection　with　what　had　occurred　on　my
return　to　my　father's　house；　the　more　certain　I　felt　that　the
stranger　who　had　kissed　me　and　wept　over　me　must　have　been　no
other　than　Uncle　George。

At　the　end　of　my　two　years　at　home　I　was　sent　to　sea　in　the
merchant　navy　by　my　own　earnest　desire。　I　had　always　determined
to　be　a　sailor　from　the　time　when　I　first　went　to　stay　with　my
aunt　at　the　sea…side；　and　I　persisted　long　enough　in　my
resolution　to　make　my　parents　recognize　the　necessity　of　acceding
to　my　wishes。

My　new　life　delighted　me；　and　I　remained　away　on　foreign　stations
more　than　four　years。　When　I　at　length　returned　home；　it　was　to
find　a　new　affliction　darkening　our　fireside。　My　father　had　died
on　the　very　day　when　I　sailed　for　my　return　voyage　to　England。

Absence　and　change　of　scene　had　in　no　respect　weakened　my　desire
to　penetrate　the　mystery　of　Uncle　George's　disappearance。　My
mother's　health　was　so　delicate　that　I　hesitated　for　some　time　to
approach　the　forbidden　subject　in　her　presence。　When　I　at　last
ventured　to　refer　to　it；　suggesting　to　her　that　any　prudent
reserve　which　might　have　been　necessary　while　I　was　a　child；　need
no　longer　be　persisted　in　now　that　I　was　growing　to　be　a　young
man；　she　fell　into　a　violent　fit　of　trembling；　and　commanded　me
to　say　no　more。　It　had　been　my　father's　will；　she　said；　that　the
reserve　to　which　I　referred　should　be　always　adopted　toward　me；
he　had　not　authorized　her；　before　he　died；　to　speak　more　openly；
and；　now　that　he　was　gone；　she　would　not　so　much　as　think　of
acting　on　her　own　unaided　judgment。　My　aunt　said　the　same　thing
in　effect　when　I　appealed　to　her。　Determined　not　to　be
discouraged　even　yet；　I　undertook　a　journey；　ostensibly　to　pay　my
respects　to　my　father's　family；　but　with　the　secret　intention　of
trying　what　I　could　learn　in　that　quarter　on　the　subject　of　Uncle
George。

My　investigations　led　to　some　results；　though　they　were　by　no
means　satisfactory。　George　had　always　been　looked　upon　with
something　like　contempt　by　his　handsome　sisters　and　his
prosperous　brothers；　and　he　had　not　improved　his　position　in　the
family　by　his　warm　advocacy　of　his　brother's　cause　at　the　time　of
my　father's　marriage。　I　found　that　my　uncle's　surviving　relatives
now　spoke　of　him　slightingly　and　carelessly。　They　assured　me　that
they　had　never　heard　from　him；　and　that　they　knew　nothing　about
him；　except　that　he　had　gone　away　to　settle；　as　they　supposed；　in
some　foreign　place；　after　having　behaved　very　basely　and　badly　to
my　father。　He　had　been　traced　to　London；　where　he　had　sold　out　of
the　funds　the　small　share　of　money　which　he　had　inherited　after
his　father's　death；　and　he　had　been　seen　on　the　deck　of　a　packet
bound　for　France　later　on　the　same　day。　Beyond　this　nothing　was
known　about　him。　In　what　the　alleged　baseness　of　his　behavior　had
consisted　none　of　his　brothers　and　sisters　could　tell　me。　My
father　had　refused　to　pain　them　by　going　into　particulars；　not
only　at　the　time　of　his　brother's　disappearance；　but　afterward；
whenever　the　subject　was　mentioned。　George　had　always　been　the
black　sheep　of　the　flock；　and　he　must　have　been　conscious　of　his
own　baseness；　or　he　would　certainly　have　written　to　explain　and
to　justify　himself。

Suc