the purcell papers-2-第4节

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from　society；　and　driven　for　companionship

to　grades　below　his　ownenjoying；

too；　the　dangerous　prerogative　of　spending

much　money。



However；　you　may　easily　suppose　that

I　found　nothing　in　my　cousin's　communication

fully　to　bear　me　out　in　so　very

decided　a　conclusion。



I　awaited　the　arrival　of　my　uncle；

which　was　every　moment　to　be　expected；

with　feelings　half　of　alarm；　half　of

curiositya　sensation　which　I　have　often

since　experienced；　though　to　a　less　degree；

when　upon　the　point　of　standing　for　the

first　time　in　the　presence　of　one　of　whom

I　have　long　been　in　the　habit　of　hearing

or　thinking　with　interest。



It　was；　therefore；　with　some　little

perturbation　that　I　heard；　first　a　slight

bustle　at　the　outer　door；　then　a　slow　step

traverse　the　hall；　and　finally　witnessed　the

door　open；　and　my　uncle　enter　the　room。

He　was　a　striking…looking　man；　from

peculiarities　both　of　person　and　of　garb；　the

whole　effect　of　his　appearance　amounted

to　extreme　singularity。　He　was　tall；　and

when　young　his　figure　must　have　been

strikingly　elegant；　as　it　was；　however；　its

effect　was　marred　by　a　very　decided　stoop。

His　dress　was　of　a　sober　colour；　and　in

fashion　anterior　to　anything　which　I　could

remember。　It　was；　however；　handsome；

and　by　no　means　carelessly　put　on；　but

what　completed　the　singularity　of　his

appearance　was　his　uncut；　white　hair；

which　hung　in　long；　but　not　at　all

neglected　curls；　even　so　far　as　his　shoulders；

and　which　combined　with　his　regularly

classic　features；　and　fine　dark　eyes；　to

bestow　upon　him　an　air　of　venerable

dignity　and　pride；　which　I　have　never　seen

equalled　elsewhere。　I　rose　as　he　entered；

and　met　him　about　the　middle　of　the

room；　he　kissed　my　cheek　and　both　my

hands；　saying：



'You　are　most　welcome；　dear　child；　as

welcome　as　the　command　of　this　poor

place　and　all　that　it　contains　can　make

you。　I　am　most　rejoiced　to　see　you

truly　rejoiced。　I　trust　that　you　are　not

much　fatiguedpray　be　seated　again。'

He　led　me　to　my　chair；　and　continued：　'I

am　glad　to　perceive　you　have　made

acquaintance　with　Emily　already；　I　see；

in　your　being　thus　brought　together；　the

foundation　of　a　lasting　friendship。　You

are　both　innocent；　and　both　young。　God

bless　youGod　bless　you；　and　make　you

all　that　I　could　wish。'





He　raised　his　eyes；　and　remained　for　a

few　moments　silent；　as　if　in　secret　prayer。

I　felt　that　it　was　impossible　that　this　man；

with　feelings　so　quick；　so　warm；　so　tender；

could　be　the　wretch　that　public　opinion

had　represented　him　to　be。　I　was　more

than　ever　convinced　of　his　innocence。



His　manner　was；　or　appeared　to　me；

most　fascinating；　there　was　a　mingled

kindness　and　courtesy　in　it　which　seemed

to　speak　benevolence　itself。　It　was　a

manner　which　I　felt　cold　art　could　never

have　taught；　it　owed　most　of　its　charm　to

its　appearing　to　emanate　directly　from　the

heart；　it　must　be　a　genuine　index　of　the

owner's　mind。　So　I　thought。



My　uncle　having　given　me　fully　to

understand　that　I　was　most　welcome；　and

might　command　whatever　was　his　own；

pressed　me　to　take　some　refreshment；　and

on　my　refusing；　he　observed　that　previously

to　bidding　me　good…night；　he　had　one　duty

further　to　perform；　one　in　whose　observance

he　was　convinced　I　would　cheerfully

acquiesce。



He　then　proceeded　to　read　a　chapter

from　the　Bible；　after　which　he　took　his

leave　with　the　same　affectionate　kindness

with　which　he　had　greeted　me；　having

repeated　his　desire　that　I　should　consider

everything　in　his　house　as　altogether　at

my　disposal。　It　is　needless　to　say　that　I

was　much　pleased　with　my　uncleit　was

impossible　to　avoid　being　so；　and　I　could

not　help　saying　to　myself；　if　such　a　man

as　this　is　not　safe　from　the　assaults　of

slander；　who　is？　I　felt　much　happier　than

I　had　done　since　my　father's　death；　and

enjoyed　that　night　the　first　refreshing

sleep　which　had　visited　me　since　that　event。



My　curiosity　respecting　my　male　cousin

did　not　long　remain　unsatisfiedhe

appeared　the　next　day　at　dinner。　His

manners；　though　not　so　coarse　as　I　had

expected；　were　exceedingly　disagreeable；

there　was　an　assurance　and　a　forwardness

for　which　I　was　not　prepared；　there

was　less　of　the　vulgarity　of　manner；　and

almost　more　of　that　of　the　mind；　than　I

had　anticipated。　I　felt　quite　uncomfortable

in　his　presence；　there　was　just　that

confidence　in　his　look　and　tone　which

would　read　encouragement　even　in　mere

toleration；　and　I　felt　more　disgusted　and

annoyed　at　the　coarse　and　extravagant

compliments　which　he　was　pleased　from

time　to　time　to　pay　me；　than　perhaps　the

extent　of　the　atrocity　might　fully　have

warranted。　It　was；　however；　one　consolation

that　he　did　not　often　appear；　being

much　engrossed　by　pursuits　about　which　I

neither　knew　nor　cared　anything；　but

when　he　did　appear；　his　attentions；　either

with　a　view　to　his　amusement　or　to　some

more　serious　advantage；　were　so　obviously

and　perseveringly　directed　to　me；　that

young　and　inexperienced　as　I　was；　even　_I_

could　not　be　ignorant　of　his　preference。　I

felt　more　provoked　by　this　odious　persecution

than　I　can　express；　and　discouraged

him　with　so　much　vigour；　that　I　employed

even　rudeness　to　convince　him　that　his

assiduities　were　unwelcome；　but　all　in

vain。



This　had　gone　on　for　nearly　a　twelve…

month；　to　my　infinite　annoyance；　when　one

day　as　I　was　sitting　at　some　needle…work

with　my　companion　Emily；　as　was　my

habit；　in　the　parlour；　the　door　opened；

and　my　cousin　Edward　entered　the　room。

There　was　something；　I　thought；　odd　in

his　mannera　kind　of　struggle　between

shame　and　impudencea　kind　of　flurry

and　ambiguity　which　made　him　appear；

if　possible；　more　than　ordinarily　disagreeable。



'Your　servant；　ladies；'　he　said；　seating

himself　at　the　same　time；　'sorry　to　spoil

your　tete…a…tete；　but　never　mind；　I'll　only

take　Emily's　place　for　a　minute　or　two；

and　then　we　part　for　a　while；　fair　cousin。

Emily；　my　father　wants　you　in　the　corner

turret。　No　shilly…shally；　he's　in　a　hurry。'

She　hesitated。　'Be　offtramp；　march！'

he　exclaimed；　in　a　tone　which　the　poor　girl

dared　not　disobey。



She　left　the　room；　and　Edward　followed

her　to　the　door。　He　stood　there　for　a

minute　or　two；　as　if　reflecting　what　he

should　say；　perhaps　satisfying　himself

that　no　one　was　within　hearing　in　the

hall。



At　length　he　turned　about；　having　closed

the　door；　as　if　carelessly；　with　his　foot；　and

advancing　slowly；　as　if　in　deep　thought；　he

took　his　seat　at　the　side　of　the　table

opposite　to　mine。



There　was　a　brief　interval　of　silence；

after　which　he　said：



'I　imagine　that　you　have　a　shrewd

suspicion　of　the　object　of　my　early　visit；　but

I　suppose　I　must　go　into　particulars。

Must　I？'



'I　have　no　conception；'　I　replied；　'what

your　object　may　be。'



'Well；　well；'　said　he；　becoming　more　at

his　ease　as　he　proceeded；　'it　may　be　told　in

a　few　words。　You　know　that　it　is　totally

impossiblequite　out　of　the　question

that　an　offhand　young　fellow　like　me；　and

a　good…looking　girl　like　yourself；　could

meet　continually；　as　you　and　I　have　done；

without　an　attachmenta　liking　growing

up　on　one　side　or　other；　in　short；　I　think

I　have　let　you　know　as　plain　as　if　I　spoke

it；　that　I　have　been　in　love　with　you

almost　from　the　first　time　I　saw

you。'



He　paused；　but　I　was　too　much　horrified

to　speak。　He　interpreted　my　silence

favourably。



'I　can　tell　you；'　he　continued；　'I'm

reckoned　rather　hard　to　please；　and　very

hard　to　HIT。　I　can't　say　when　I　was　taken

with　a　girl　before；　so　you　see　fortune

reserved　me'



Here　the　odious　wretch　wound　his　arm

round　my　waist。　The　action　at　once

restored　me　to　utterance；　and　with　the　most

indignant　vehemence　I　released　myself

from　his　hold；　and　at　the　same　time

said：



'I　have　not　been　insensible；　sir；　of　your

most　disagreeable　attentionsthey　have

long　been　a　source　of　much　annoyance　to

me；　and　you　must　be　aware　that　I　have

marked　my　disapprobationmy　disgust

as　unequivocally　as　I　possibly　could；　without

actual　indelicacy。'



I　paused；　almost　out　of　breath　from　the

rapidity　with　which　I　had　spoken；　and

without　giving　him　time　to　renew　the

conversation；　I　hastily　quitted　the　room；

leaving　him　in　a　paroxysm　of　rage　and

mortification。　As　I　ascended　the　stairs；

I　heard　him　open　the　parlour…door　with

violence；　and　take　two　or　three　rapid　strides

in　the　direction　in　which　I　was　moving。　I

was　now　much　frightened；　and　ran　the

whole　way　until　I　reached　my　room；　and

having　locked　the　door；　I　listened　breathlessly；

but　heard　no　sound。　This　relieved

me　for　the　present；　but　so　much　had　I

been　overcome　by　the　agitation　and　annoyance

attendant　upon　the　scene　which　I　had

just　gone　through；　that　when　my　cousin

Emily　knocked　at　my　door；　I　was　weeping

in　strong　hysterics。



You　wi