uncle remus-第29节

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hty　cu'us；　Brer　Remus。〃

〃Cum　down　ter　dat；　Brer　Ab；〃　said　Uncle　Remus；　wiping　his　spectacles　carefully；　and　readjusting　them…〃cum　down　ter　dat；　an'　dey　ain't　nuthin'　dat　ain't　cu'us。　I　ain't　no　spishus　nigger　myse'f；　but　I　'spizes　fer　ter　year　dogs　a　howlin'　an'　squinch…owls　havin'　de　ager　out　in　de　woods；　an'　w'en　a　bull　goes　a　bellerin'　by　de　house　den　my　bones　git　cole　an'　my　flesh　cornmences　fer　ter　creep；　but　w'en　it　comes　ter　deze　yer　sines　in　de　a'r　an'　deze　yer　sperrits　in　de　woods；　den　I'm　out…den　I'm　done。　I　is；　fer　a　fack。　I　bin　livin'　yer　more'n　Seventy　year；　an'　I　year　talk　er　niggers　seein'　ghos'es　all　times　er　night　an'　all　times　er　day；　but　I　ain't　never　seed　none　yit；　an'　deze　yer　flags　an'　Jacob's　lathers；　I　ain't　seed　dem；　nudder。〃

〃Dey　er　dar；　Brer　Remus。〃

〃Hit's　des　like　I　tell　you；　Brer　Ab。　I　ain't　'sputin'　'bout　it；　but　I　ain't　seed　um；　an'　I　don't　take　no　chances　deze　days　on　dat　w'at　I　don't　see；　an'　dat　w'at　I　sees　I　got　ter　'zamine　mighty　close。　Lemme　tell　you　dis；　Brer　Ab：　don't　you　let　deze　sines　onsettle　you。　W'en　old　man　Gabrile　toot　his　ho'n；　he　ain't　gwinter　hang　no　sine　out　in　de　winder…panes；　an　when　ole　Fadder　Jacob　lets　down　dat　lather　er　his'n　you'll　be　mighty　ap'　fer　ter　hear　de　racket。　An'　don't　you　bodder　wid　jedgment…day。　Jedgment…day　is　lierbul　fer　ter　take　keer　un　itse'f。〃

〃Dat's　so；　Brer　Remus。〃

〃Hit's　bleedzed　ter　be　so；　Brer　Ab。　Hit　don't　bodder　me。　Hit's　done　got　so　now　dat　w'en　I　gotter　pone　er　bread；　an'　a　rasher　er　bacon；　an'　nuff　grease　fer　ter　make　gravy；　I　ain't　keerin'　much　w'edder　fokes　sees　ghos'es　er　no。

XIV　THAT　DECEITFUL　JUG

UNCLE　REMUS　was　in　good　humor　one　evening　recently　when　he　dropped　casually　into　the　editorial　room　of　〃The　Constitution；〃　as　has　been　his　custom　for　the　past　year　or　two。　He　had　a　bag　slung　across　his　shoulder；　and　in　the　bag　was　a　jug。　The　presence　of　this　humble　but　useful　vessel　in　Uncle　Remus's　bag　was　made　the　occasion　for　several　suggestive　jokes　at　his　expense　by　the　members　of　the　staff；　but　the　old　man's　good　humor　was　proof　against　all　insinuations。

〃Dat　ar　jug's　bin　ter　wab；　mon。　Hit's　wunner　deze　yer　ole　timers。　I　got　dat　jug　down　dar　in　Putmon　County　w'en　Mars　'Lisha　Ferryman　wuz　a　young　man；　an'　now　he's　done　growed　up；　an'　got　ole　an'　died；　an'　his　chilluns　is　growed　up　an'　dey　kin　count　dere　gran'chilluns；　an'　yit　dar's　dat　jug　des　ez　lively　an'　ez　lierbul　fer　ter　kick　up　devilment　ez　w'at　she　wuz　w'en　she　come　fum　de　foundry。〃

〃That's　the　trouble；〃　said　one　of　the　young　men。　〃That's　the　reason　we'd　like　to　know　what's　in　it　now。

〃Now　youer　gittin'　on　ma'shy　groun'；〃　replied　Uncle　Remus。　〃Dat's　de　p'int。　Dat's　w'at　make　me　say　w'at　I　duz。　I　bin　knowin'　dat　jug　now　gwine　on　sixty…fl'　year；　an'　de　jug　w'at's　more　seetful　dan　dat　jug　ain't　on　de　topside　er　de　worrul。　Dar　she　sets；〃　continued　the　old　man；　gazing　at　it　reflectively；　〃dar　she　sets　dez　ez　natchul　ez　er　ambertype；　an'　yit　whar's　de　man　w'at　kin　tell　w'at　kinder　confab　she's　a　gwineter　carry　on　w'en　dat　corn…cob　is　snatched　outen　'er　mouf？　Dat　jug　is　mighty　seefful；　mon。〃

〃Well；　it　don't　deceive　any　of　us　up　here；〃　remarked　the　agricultural　editor；　dryly。　〃We've　seen　jugs　before。〃

〃I　boun'　you　is；　boss；　I　boun'　you　is。　But　you　ain't　seed　no　seetful　jug　like　dat。　Dar　she　sets　a　bellyin'　out　an'　lookin'　mighty　fat　an'　full；　an'　yit　she'd　set　dar　a　bellyin'　out　ef　dere　wuzent　nuthin'　but　win'　under　dat　stopper。　You　knows　dat　she　ain't　got　no　aigs　in　her；　ner　no　bacon；　ner　no　grits；　ncr　no　termartusses；　ner　no　shellotes；　an'　dat's　'bout　all　you　duz　know。　Dog　my　cats　ef　de　seetfulness　er　dat　jug　don't　git　away　wid　me；　coutmued　Uncle　Remus；　with　a　chuckle。　〃I　wuz　comm'　'cross　de　bridge　des　now；　an'　Brer　John　Henry　seed　me　wid　de　bag　slung　onter　my　back；　an'　de　jug　in　it；　an'　he　ups　an'　sez；　sezee：

Heyo；　Brer　Remus；　ain't　it　gittin'　late　for　watermillions？'

〃Hit　wuz　de　seeffulness　er　dat　jug。　If　Brer　John　Henry　know'd　de　color　er　dat　watermillion；　I　speck　he'd　snatch　me　up　'fo'　de　confunce。　I　'clar'　ter　grashus　ef　dat　jug　ain't　a　caution！〃

〃I　suppose　it's　full　of　molasses　now；〃　remarked　one　of　the　young　men；　sarcastically。

〃Hear　dat！〃　exclaimed　Uncle　Remus；　triumphantly　…'hear　dat！　W'at　I　tell　you？　I　sed　dat　jug　wuz　seetful；　an'　I　sticks　to　it。　I　bin　knowin'　dat…〃

〃What　has　it　got　in　it？〃　broke　in　some　one；　〃molasses；　kerosene；　or　train…oil？〃

〃Well；　I　lay　she's　loaded；　boss。　I　ain't　shuk　her　up　sence　I　drapt　in；　but　I　lay　she's　loaded。〃

〃Yes；〃　said　the　agricultural　editor；　〃and　it's　the　meanest　bug…juice　in　town…regular　sorghum　skimmings。〃

〃Dat's　needer　yer　ner　dar；〃　responded　Uncle　Remus。　〃Po'　fokes　better　be　fixin'　up　for　Chrismus　now　w'ile　rashuns　is　cheap。　Dat's　me。　W'en　I　year　Miss　Sally　gwine　'bout　de　house　w'isslin'　'W'en　I　k'n　Read　my　Titles　Cier'…an'　w'en　I　see　de　martins　swawmin'　atter　sundown…an'　w'en　I　year　de　peckerwoods　confabbin'　togedder　dese　moonshiny　nights　in　my　een　er　town…en　I　knows　de　hot　wedder's　a　breakin'　up；　an'　I　know　it's　'bout　time　fer　po'　fokes　fer　ter　be　rastlin'　'roun'　and　huntin'　up　dere　rashuns。　Dat's　me；　up　an　down。〃

〃Well；　we　are　satisfied。　Better　go　and　hire　a　hall；〃　remarked　the　sporting　editor；　with　a　yawn。　〃If　you　are　engaged　in　a　talking　match　you　have　won　the　money。　Blanket　him　somebody；　and　take　him　to　the　stable。〃

〃An'　w'at's　mo'；〃　continued　the　old　man；　scorning　to　notice　the　insinuation；　〃dough　I　year　Miss　Sally　w'isslin'；　an'　de　peckerwoods　a　chatterin'；　I　ain't　seein'　none　er　deze　yer　loafin'　niggers　fixin'　up　fer　ter　'migrate。　Dey　kin　holler　Kansas　all　'roun'　de　naberhood；　but　ceppin'　a　man　come　'long　an'　spell　it　wid　greenbacks；　he　don't　ketch　none　er　deze　yer　town　niggers。　You　year　me；　dey　ain't　gwine。〃

〃Stand　him　up　on　the　table；〃　said　the　Sporting　editor；　〃give　him　room。〃

〃Better　go　down　yer　ter　de　calaboose；　an'　git　some　news　fer　ter　print；〃　said　Uncle　Remus；　with　a　touch　of　irony　in　his　tone。　〃Some　new　nigger　mighter　broke　inter　jail。〃

〃You　say　the　darkeys　are　not　going　to　emigrate　this　year？〃　inquired　the　agricultural　editor；　who　is　interested　in　these　things。

〃Shoo！　dat　dey　ain't！　I　done　seed　an'　I　knows。〃

〃Well；　how　do　you　know？〃

〃How　you　tell　w'en　crow　gwineter　light？　Niggers　bin　prom'nadin'　by　my　house　all　dis　summer；　holdin'　dere　heads　high　up　an'　de　w'ites　er　dere　eyeballs　shinin'　in　de　sun。　Dey　wuz　too　bigitty　fer　ter　look　over　de　gyardin'　palm's。　'Long　'bout　den　de　wedder　wuz　fetchin'　de　nat'al　sperrits　er　turkentime　outen　de　pine…trees　an'　de　groun'　wuz　fa'rly　smokin'　wid　de　hotness。　Now　that　it's　gittin'　sorter　airish　in　de　mornin's；　dey　don't　'pear　like　de　same　niggers。　Dey　done　got　so　deyll　look　over　in　de　yard；　an'　nex'　news　you　know　de'll　be　tryin'　fer　ter　scrape　up　'quaintence　wid　de　dog。　W'en　dey　passes　now　dey　looks　at　de　chicken…coop　an'　at　der　tater…patch。　W'en　you　see　niggers　gittin'　dat　familious；　you　kin　'pen'　on　dere　campin'　wid　you　de　ballunce　er　de　season。　Day　'fo'　yistiddy　I　kotch　one　un　um　lookin'　over　de　fence　at　my　shoats；　an'　I　sez；　sez　I：

'Duz　you　wanter　purchis　dem　hogs？'

〃'Oh；　no；'　sezee；　'I　wnz　des　lookin'　at　dere　p'ints。'

〃'Well；　dey　ain't　p'intin'　yo'　way；　sez　I；　'an'；　fuddermo'；　ef　you　don't　bodder　longer　dem　hogs　dey　ain't　gwineter　clime　outer　dat　pen　an'　'tack　you；　nudder；'〃　sez　I。

〃An'　I　boun'；〃　continued　Uncle　Remus；　driving　the　corn…cob　stopper　a　little　tighter　in　his　deceitful　jug　and　gathering　up　his　bag…〃an'　I　boun'　dat　my　ole　muskitil　go　off　'tween　me　an'　dat　same　nigger　yit；　an'　he'll　be　at　de　bad　een'；　an'　dis　seetful　jugll　'fuse　ter　go　ter　de　funer'l。〃

XV　THE　FLORIDA　WATERMELON

'LOOK；　yer；　boy；〃　said　Uncle　Remus　yesterday；　Stopping　near　the　railroad　crossing　on　Whitehall　Street；　and　gazing　ferociously　at　a　small　colored　youth；　〃look　yer；　boy；　Ill　lay　you　out　flat　ef　you　come　flingin'　yo'　watermillion　rimes　under　my　foot…you　watch　ef　I　don't。　You　k'n　play　yo'　pranks　on　deze　yer　w'ite　fokes；　but　w'en　you　come　a　cuttin'　up　yo'　capers　roun　me　youil　Ian'　right　in　de　middle　uv　er　spell　er　sickness…now　you　mine　w'at　I　tell　you。　An'　I　ain't　gwine　fer　ter　put　up　wid　none　er　yo'　sassness　nudder　…let　'lone　flingin'　watermillion　rimes　whar　I　kin　git　niixt　up　wid　um。　I　done　had　nuff　watermillions　yisfiddy　an'　de　day　befo'。〃

〃How　was　that；　Uncle　Remus？〃　asked　a　gentleman　standing　near。

〃Hit　wuz　sorter　like　dis；　boss。　Las'　Chuseday；　Mars　John　he　fotch　home　two　er　deze　yer　Flurridy　watermillions；　an　him　an'　Miss　Sally　sot　down　fer　ter　eat　tim。　Mars　John　an'　Miss　Sally　ain't　got　nuthin'　dat's　too　good　fer　me；　an'　de　fus　news　I　know'd　Miss　Sally　wuz　a　hollerin'　fer　Remus。　I　done　smelt　de　watermillion　on　de　a'r；　an'　I　ain't　got　no　better　sense　dan　fer　ter　go　w'en　I　years　w'ite　fokes　a　hollerin'…I　larnt　dat　w'en　I　wa'n't　so　high。　Leas'ways　I　galloped　up　ter　de　back　po'ch；　an'　dar　sot　de　watermillions　dez　ez　natchul　ez　ef　dey'd　er　bin　raised　on　de　ole　Spivey　place　in　Putmon　County。　Den　Miss　Sally；　she　cut　me　off　er　slishe…wunner　deze　yer　ongodly　slishes；　big　ez　yo'　hat；　an'　I　sot　down　on　de　Steps　an'　wrop　myse'f　roun'　de　whole　blessid　chunk；　'cepin'　de　rime〃　Uncle　Remus　paused　and　laid　his　hand　upon　his　stomach　as　if　feeling　for　something。

〃Well；　old　man；　what　then？〃

〃Dat's　w'at　I'm　a　gittin'　at；