honore de balzac-第7节
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The members of the family were gathered together in the parlour at Villeparisis； for the purpose of judging the masterpiece and deciding whether the rebel who had refused to be a notary had not squandered the time accorded him in which to give proof of his future prospects as an author。 The father and mother were there； both anxious； the one slightly sceptical； yet hoping that his son would reveal himself as a man of talent； the other as mistrustful as ever； but at the same time much distressed to see her son so thin and sallow； for during those fifteen months of exile he had lost his high colour and his eyes were feverish and his lips trembling； in spite of his fine air of assurance。 Laurence was there； young； lively and self…willed； and Laure also； sharing the secret of the tragedy and sighing and trembling on behalf of Honore； her favourite brother。 It was a difficult audience to conquer； for they had also invited for that evening such friends as knew of the test imposed upon the oldest son； and these same friends； while perhaps regarding it as a piece of parental weakness； nevertheless now played the role of judges。
〃At the end of April； 1820；〃 relates Mme Surville； 〃he arrived at my father's home with his finished tragedy。 He was much elated； for he counted upon scoring a triumph。 Accordingly； he desired that a few friends should be present at the reading。 And he did not forget the one who had so strangely underestimated him。 （A friend； who judged him solely on the strength of his excellent handwriting； declared； when the question arose of choosing a position for him； that he would never make anything better than a good shipping clerk。）
〃The friends arrived； and the solemn test began。 But the reader's enthusiasm rapidly died out as he discovered how little impression he was making and noted the coldness or the consternation on the faces before him。 I was one of those who shared in the consternation。 What I suffered during that reading was a foretaste of the terrors I was destined to experience at the opening performances of Vautrin and Quinola。
〃With Cromwell he had not yet avenged himself upon M。 （the friend of whom mention has just been made）； for； blunt as ever； the latter pronounced his opinion of the tragedy in the most uncompromising terms。 Honore protested； and declined to accept his judgment； but his other auditors； though in milder terms； all agreed that the work was extremely faulty。
〃My father voiced the consensus of opinion when he proposed that they should have Cromwell read by some competent and impartial authority。 M。 Surville； engineer of the Ourcq Canal； who was later to become Honore's brother…in…law； suggested a former professor of his at the Polytechnic School。 （Mlle。 Laure de Balzac was married in May； 1820； one month after the reading of Cromwell； to M。 Midy de Greneraye Surville； engineer of Bridges and Highways。）
〃My father accepted this dean of literature as decisive judge。
〃After a conscientious reading； the good old man declared that the author of Cromwell had better follow any other career in the world than that of literature。〃
Such was the judgment passed upon this masterpiece which had been intended to be 〃the breviary of peoples and of kings！〃 Yet these successive condemnations in no way shook Balzac's confidence in his own genius。 He wished to be a great man； and in spite of all predictions to the contrary he was going to be a great man。 No doubt he re…read his tragedy in cold blood and laughed at it； realising all its emphatic and bombastic mediocrity。 But it was a dead issue； and now with a new tensity of purpose he looked forward to the works which he previsioned in the nebulous and ardent future； no setback could turn him aside from the path which he had traced for himself。
Chapter 3。
His Apprenticeship。
The precious hours of liberty； in the mansarde garret； had taken flight。 After fifteen months of independence； study and work； Honore returned to the family circle； summoned home by his mother。 She desired； no doubt； to care for him and restore his former robust health which had been undermined by a starvation diet； but she also wished to keep him under strict surveillance； since privation had failed to bend his will and the disaster of his tragedy had not turned him aside from his purpose。 Honore； unconquered by defeat； had asked that they should assure him an annual allowance of fifteen hundred francs； in order that he might redeem his failure at an early date。 This request was refused； and nothing was guaranteed him beyond food and lodging； absolutely nothing； unless he submitted to their wishes。
What years of struggle those were！ Honore de Balzac refused to despair of his destiny； and he valiantly entered upon the hardest of all his battles； without support and without encouragement； in the midst of hostile surroundings。 He used to go from Villeparisis to Paris； seeking literary gatherings； knocking at the doors of publishers； exhausting himself in the search for some opening。 And how could he work under the paternal roof？ Nowhere in the house could he find the necessary quiet； and he was practically looked upon as an incapable； an outcast who would be a disgrace to his family。 He himself felt the precariousness of his present situation； and in consequence became taciturn； since he could not communicate to the others his own unwavering faith in the future； and he was forced to admit that； at the age of twenty…two； he had not yet given them any earnest of future success。
In order to demonstrate that it is not impossible to live by literature； and more especially for the sake of establishing his material independence； he was ready to accept any sort of a task whatever。 And all the more so； since his mother had not given up hope of making him accept one of those fine careers in which an industrious young fellow may win esteem and fortune。 The 〃spectre of the daily grind〃 stared him in the face； and although he had escaped a notary's career； through the death of the man to whose practice he was to have succeeded； they gave him to understand that the sombre portals of a government position might open to him。
〃Count me among the dead；〃 he wrote to his sister Laure； who； since her marriage； had resided at Bayeux； 〃if they clap that extinguisher over me。 I should turn into a trick horse； who does his thirty or forty rounds per hour； and eats； drinks and sleeps at the appointed moment。 And they call that living！that mechanical rotation； that perpetual recurrence of the same thing！〃
In spite of a few short trips； and occasional brief sojourns in Paris； in the one foothold which his father had retained there； he was constrained by necessity to remain beneath the family roof…tree。 They gave him his food and his clothing； but no money。 He suffered from this； and groaned and grumbled as if he were in a state of slavery。 Nevertheless； his unquenchable good humour and his determination to make his name famous and to acquire a fortune saved him from the impotence of melancholy。 He drew spirited sketches of the family and sent them to Laure； to prove to her that he was resigned。
He admired his father's impassiveness in the midst of all the confusion of the household； like an Egyptian pyramid； indifferent to the hurricane。 The fine old man who expected to live upwards of a hundred years and share with the State； as last survivor； the profits of a Lafarge tontine policy in which he held a share； a sum amounting to millions； studied the writings of the Chinese because they were famous for their longevity。 He had lost nothing of his serenity nor of his caustic wit； and Honore confessed that he himself had very nearly choked； laughing at some of his jests。 Nevertheless he was not a father in whom one could confide； and the son； isolated and forced to conceal his feelings； found relief only in his brief periods of work in Paris； and in observing the habits and manners of the family circle。 He witnessed the preparations for the marriage of his sister； Laurence； to M。 de Montzaigle； visiting inspector of the city imposts of Paris； and he drew this picturesque portrait of his future brother…in…law： 〃He is somewhat taller than Surville； his features are quite ordinary； neither homely nor handsome； his mouth is widowed of the upper teeth； and there is no reason for assuming that it will contract a second marriage； since mother nature forbids it； this widowhood ages him considerably； but on the whole he is not so badas husbands go。 He writes poetry； he is a marvellous shot； if he fires twenty times； he brings down not less than twenty…six victims！ He has been in only two tournaments； and has taken the prize both times； he is equally strong in billiards； he rhymes； he hunts； he shoots； he drives； he 。 。 。 ； he 。 。 。 ； he 。 。 。 And you feel that all these accomplishments； carried to the highest degree in one and the same man； have given him great presumption； that is the trouble with him up to a certain point； and that certain point； I am very much afraid； is the highest degree in the thermometer of self…conceit。〃
Honore admitted； however； that his sister Laurence would be happy in her marriage and that M。 de Montzaigle was a thorough gentleman； but it was not after this
