the prophet of berkeley square-第39节

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the　Prophet　to　Mr。　Sagittarius；　a　quarter　of　an　hour　later。　〃Draw　it　in

at　the　back。〃



Mr。　Sagittarius；　with　shaking　hands；　drew　in　the　waistcoat　of　Mr。

Ferdinand；　which　hung　in　folds　around　his　thin　and　agitated　figure。



〃That's　better；〃　said　the　Prophet。　〃They　won't　notice　anything　odd。　But

you've　turned　up　yourMr。　Ferdinand's　trousers！〃



〃They're　too　long；　sir。　You　braced　them　too　low　for〃



〃I　braced　them　low　on　purpose；〃　cried　the　Prophet　in　great　excitement；

〃to　cover　the　spats；　since　you　can't　get　on　Mr。　Ferdinand's　boots。

Kindly　turn　them　down。〃



〃As　to　the　spats；　sir；　the　architects　and　their　wives〃



〃Mr。　Sagittarius；〃　exclaimed　the　Prophet；　〃I　think　it　right　to　inform

you　that　if　you　mention　the　architects　and　their　wives　again；　I　may

very　probably　go　mad。　I　don't　say　I　shall；　but　I　will　not　answer　for

myself。　Have　the　goodness　to　turn　them　down　and　follow　me。〃



Mr。　Sagittarius　obeyed；　and　followed　the　Prophet　from　the　room　with　a

waddling　gait　and　a　terrible　sensation　of　having　nothing　on。　The　coat

and　trousers　which　he　wore　flapped　about　him　as　he　descended　the　stairs

in　the　wake　of　the　Prophet；　glancing　nervously　about　him　and　starting

at　the　slightest　sound。　In　the　library　they　found　Madame；　holding　the

great　Juvenile　upside　down　and　looking　exceedingly　cross。



〃Will　you　be　good　enough　to　come　upstairs？〃　said　the　Prophet　to　her

very　politely；　though　his　fingers　twitched　to　strangle　her。　〃I　wish　to

present　you　to　my　grandmother；　and　dinner　is　just　ready。〃



Madame　rose　with　dignity。



〃I　am　ready　too；〃　she　said；　with　a　click。　〃/Semper　paratis/。〃



And；　shaking　up　the　fichu；　she　ascended　the　stairs。　Outside　the

drawing…room　door　the　Prophet；　who　seemed　strangely　calm；　but　who　was

in　reality　almost　bursting　with　nervous　excitement；　paused　and　faced

his　old　and　valued　friends。



〃You　will　forgive　my　saying　so；　I　hope；〃　he　whispered；　〃but　my

grandmother　is　not　well　and　much　conversation　tires　her。　So　we　don't

talk　too　much　in　her　presence。　Only　just　now　and　then；　you　understand。〃



And　with　this　last　injunctionfutile；　he　knew　as　he　gave　ithe

commended　himself　to　whatever　powers　there　be　and　opened　the　door。



Sir　Tiglath　had　not　yet　arrived；　but　Lady　Julia　Postlethwaite　was

seated　on　a　sofa　by　Mrs。　Merillia；　and　was　conversing　with　her　about

the　Court；　the　dreadful　amount　of　money　a　certain　dukeher　third

cousinhad　recently　had　to　pay　in　Death　Duties；　the　corrupt　condition

of　society；　and　the　absurd　pretensions　of　the　lower　middle　classes。

Lady　Julia　was　sensitive　and　a　very　/grande　dame/。　She　wore　her　hair

powdered；　and　had　a　slight　cough　and　exquisite　manners。　Once　a　lady　in

waiting；　she　was　now　a　widow；　possessed　a　set　of　apartments　in　Hampton

Court　Palace；　worshipped　Queen　Alexandra；　and　had　scarcely　ever　spoken

to　anybody　who　moved　outside　of　Court　Circles。　The　Duke　of　Wellington

was　said　to　have　embraced　her　when　a　child。



Mrs。　Merillia　and　this　lady　looked　up　when　the　door　opened；　and　Lady

Julia　paused　midway　in　a　sentence；　of　which　these　were　the　opening

words；



〃The　old　duke　wouldn't　make　it　over；　and　so　poor　Loftus　has　to　pay

nearly　a　million　to　the　Chancellor　of　the　Excheq〃



〃How　d'you　do；　Lady　Julia？　Grannie；　I　have　persuaded　my　friends；　Mr。

and　Madame　Sagittarius；　to　join　us　at　dinner。　Sir　Tiglath　Butt　is　most

anxious　to　meet　Mr。　Sagittarius；　who　is　a　great　astronomer。　Let　me

Madame　Sagittarius；　Mrs。　MerilliaMr。　SagittariusMrs。　Merillia；　my

grandmotherLady　Julia　Postlethwaite。〃



Mrs。　Merillia；　although　taken　completely　by　surprise；　and　fully

conscious　that　her　grandson　had　committed　an　outrage　in　turning　an

arranged　and　intimate　quartette　without　permission　into　a　disorganised

sextette；　bowed　with　self…possessed　graciousness；　and　indicated　a　chair

to　Madame；　who　seated　herself　in　it　with　that　sort　of　defensive　and

ostentatious　majesty　which　is　often　supposed　by　ill…bred　people　to　be　a

perfect　society　manner。　Mr。　Sagittarius　remained　standing　in　his

enormous　suit；　turning　out　his　feet；　over　which　Mr。　Ferdinand's

trousers　rippled　in　broadcloth　waves；　in　the　first　position。　A　slight

pause　ensued；　during　which　the　Prophet　was　uncomfortably　affected　by

the　behaviour　of　Madame；　who　gazed　at　the　very　neat　and　superior　wig

worn　by　Mrs。　Merillia；　and　at　that　lady's　charming　silver　grey　damask

gown；　in　a　manner　that　suggested　amazement　tempered　with　indignation；

her　instant　expression　of　these　two　sentiments　being　only　held　in　check

by　a　certain　reverence　which　was　doubtless　inspired　by　the　pretty　room；

the　thick　carpet；　the　ancestral　pictures　upon　the　walls；　and　the　lofty

bearing　of　Lady　Julia　Postlethwaite；　who　could　scarcely　conceal　her

very　natural　surprise　at　the　extraordinary　appearance　of　Mr。

Sagittarius。　As　to　Mrs。　Merillia；　although　she　was；　in　reality；　near

fainting　with　wonder　at　her　grandson's　escapade；　she　preserved　an

expression　of　gracious　benignity；　and　did　not　allow　a　motion　of　her

eyelids　or　a　flutter　of　her　fan　to　betray　her　emotion　at　finding

herself　the　unprepared　hostess　of　such　unusual　guests。　The　Prophet

broke　the　silence　by　saying；　in　a　voice　that　cracked　with　agitation；



〃I　trustI　sincerely　trust　that　we　shall　have　a　clement　spring　this

year。〃



Lady　Julia；　at　whom　he　had　looked　while　uttering　this　original　desire；

was　about　to　reply　when　Madame　uttered　a　stentorian　click　and

interposed。



〃In　the　spring　the　young　man's　fancy　lightly　turns　to　thoughts　of

love；〃　she　remarked；　with　the　fictitious　ease　of　profound　ill…breeding。



No　one　dared　to　dispute　the　portentous　statement；　and　she　resumed

majestically；



〃The　Mouse　is　delicious　in　spring。〃



There　was　another　dead　silence；　and　Madame；　turning　with　patronising

and　heavy　affability　towards　Lady　Julia；　added；



〃Your　ladyship　doubtless　loves　the　Mouse/Mus　Pulcherrimo/in　spring

as　I　do？〃



The　Prophet　felt　as　if　he　were　being　pricked　by　thousands　of　red…hot

needles；　and　the　perspiration　burst　out　in　beads　upon　his　forehead。



〃I　am　not　specially　fond　of　mice　in　spring；　or　indeed　at　any　season；〃

replied　Lady　Julia；　with　her　slight；　but　very　distinct　and　bell…like；

cough。



〃I　said　the　Mouse；　your　ladyship；〃　returned　Madame；　feeding　upon　this

titled　acquaintance　with　her　bulging　black　eyes；　and　pushing　the　kid

boots　well　out　from　under　her　brown　skirt。　〃I　observed　that　the　Mouse

was　peculiarly　delicious　in　the　season　of　love。〃



〃No　mouse　attracts　me；〃　said　Lady　Julia；　coughing　again　and　raising　her

fine　eyebrows　slightly。　〃I　should　much　prefer　to　pass　the　spring

without　the　companionship　of　any　mouse　whatever。〃



Both　Madame　and　Mr。　Sagittarius　opened　their　lips　to　reply；　but　before

they　could　eject　a　single　word　the　door　was　opened　by　Mr。　Ferdinand；

who　announced；



〃Sir　Tiglath　Butt。〃



Mr。　Sagittarius　started　violently　and　upset　a　vase　of　roses；　the

astronomer　rolled　into　the　room　with　a　very　red　face；　and　Mr。　Ferdinand

added；



〃Dinner　is　served。〃



Mrs。　Merillia　shook　hands　with　Sir　Tiglath　and　glanced　despairingly

around　her。　It　was　sufficiently　obvious　that　she　was　considering　how　to

arrange　the　procession　to　the　dining…room。



〃Hennessey；〃　she　began；　〃will　you　take　Lady　Julia？　Sir　Tiglath；　will

you〃she　paused；　but　there　was　no　help　for　it；　she　was　obliged　to

continue〃take　Mrs。　Sagittarius？　Let　me　introduce　you；　Sir　Tiglath

ButtMrs。　Sagittarius。　Mr。　Sagittarius；　will　you　take〃



〃Mr。　Sagittarius！〃　roared　Sir　Tiglath。　〃Where　is　he？〃



That　gentleman　gathered　Mr。　Ferdinand's　trousers　up　in　both　hands　and

prepared　for　instantaneous　flight。



〃Where　is　he？〃　bellowed　Sir　Tiglath；　wheeling　round　with　amazing

rapidity　for　so　fat　a　man。　〃Ha！〃



He　had　viewed　Mr。　Sagittarius；　who；　grasping　Mr。　Ferdinand's　suit　in

pleats；　ducked　his　head　like　one　wishing　to　be　beforehand　with　violence

and　set　the　spats　towards　the　door。　Sir　Tiglath　advanced　upon　him。



〃The　old　astronomer　has　heard　the　name　of　Sagittarius；〃　he　vociferated。

〃He　has　been　informed　that〃



〃It's　not　true；　sir；〃　cried　Mr。　Sagittarius；　pale　with　terror。　〃It　is

not　true。　I　deny　it。　I　am　an　AmeriI　mean　I　am　not　the　American

syndicateyou　are　in　error；　in　absolute　error。　I　swear　it。　I　take　the

heavens　to　witness。〃



At　this　remarkable　and　comprehensive　statement　Mrs。　Merillia　and　Lady

Julia　looked　at　each　other　in　elegant　amazement。



〃What　do　you　mean；　sir？〃　exclaimed　Sir　Tiglath。　〃And　why　do　you　insult

the　sacred　heavens；　you　an　astronomer！〃



〃I　am　not　an　astronomer；〃　cried　Mr。　Sagittarius；　cringing　in　the

voluminous　waistcoat　of　Mr。　Ferdinand。　〃I　am　an　outside　broker。　I　swear

it。　My　dress；　my　manner　proclaim　the　fact。　Sophronia；　tell　the

gentleman　that　I　am　an　outside　broker　and　that　all　Margate　has

recognised　me　as　such。〃



〃My　husband　states　the　fact；〃　said　Madame；　in　response　to　this

impassioned　appeal。　〃My　husband　brokes　outside；　and　has　done　for　the

last　twent