the prophet of berkeley square-第25节

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　〃Must　insist；　then　call　her　Susan　and　wire。Sagittarius。〃



　〃Cannot　possibly　consent　to　call　her　Susan；　discussion　of　such

　　matter　by　wire　not　decent；　regret　must　absolutely　decline。

　　Vivian。〃



　〃Madame　and　self　insulted　by　accusation　not　decent；　demand　

　　explanation　and　apology。Sagittarius。〃



　〃Regret；　no　desire　give　pain　to　lady；　but　this　must　cease；

　　grandmother　and　square　seriously　upset　by　procession　of　telegraph

　　boys。Vivian。〃



　〃Cannot　help　square　and　grandmother；　must　have　last　night's　result

　　to　compare　with　own　observation　of　grandmother　with　crab　and

　　scorpion。Sagittarius。〃



　〃Pray　cease；　would　rather　die　than　discuss　grandmother　with　crab

　　and　scorpion　by　wire。Vivian。〃



　〃Rubbish！　Call　crab　Susan；　scorpion　Jane；　grandmother　Harry；　and

　　wire；　absolutely　insist。Sagittarius。〃



　〃Absolutely　decline　discuss　crab；　scorpion　and　grandmother　by　wire；

　　final。Vivian。



　〃Scandalous！　not　behaviour　of　gentleman；　Madame　cut　to　heart；

　　infamous。Sagittarius。〃



　〃Mater　familiaris　pallidibus　ira。Madame　Sagittarius。〃



　〃If　receive　no　reply　as　to　grandmother　and　crab；　et　cetera；　shall

　　start　at　once　for　Square。Jupiter　and　Madame　Sagittarius。〃



　〃On　no　account　trouble　come　up；　going　out　immediately；　important

　　engagement。Vivian。〃



　〃Madame　putting　on　boots。Sagittarius。〃



　〃Utterly　useless　put　on　boots；　leaving　house。Vivian。〃



　〃Madame　boots　on；　tying　bonnet。Sagittarius。〃



　〃Totally　useless　tie　bonnet；　absolutely　forced　leave　house。

　　Vivian。〃



　〃Madame　in　pelisse；　shall　come　in　wait　till　your　return。

　　Sagittarius。〃



　〃Regret　pelisse；　quite　useless；　out　till　late　evening。Vivian。〃



　〃Shall　stay　till　whatever　hour；　have　on　hat　and　bonnet　now；

　　starting。Jupiter　and　Madame　Sagittarius。〃



　〃For　Heaven's　sake　don't；　will　wire　whatever　you　wish。Vivian。〃



　〃Don't。　Ankles　perhaps　catching；　dangerous　Capricornus。Vivian。〃



　〃Have　you　started？Vivian。〃



　〃Have　not　started；　but　at　threshold　of　door；　wire　full　explanation

　　of　crab　with　grandmother；　et　cetera；　last　night　or　shall　start

　　instanter。Jupiter　and　Madame　Sagittarius。〃



　〃Truth　is　very　little　result　last　night；　did　not　see　crab　with

　　grandmother；　deeply　regret。Vivian。〃



　〃Then　wire　result　of　scorpion　with　grandmother。Sagittarius。〃



　〃Very　sorry　did　not　see　scorpion　with　grandmother。Vivian。〃



　〃Impossible；　believe　stars　out；　clear　sky；　self　and　Madame

　　distinctly　observed　crab　and　scorpion　with　grandmother　for　four

　　hours。Sagittarius。〃



　〃On　honour　did　not　see　crab；　scorpion　or　grandmother。Vivian。〃



　〃Then　has　grandmother　passed　over？Sagittarius。〃



　〃Certainly　not；　but　no　result；　pray　cease　discussion；　grandmother

　　and　square　distracted　by　incessant　uproar　of　boys　at　door。

　　Vivian。〃



　〃Leaving　house；　with　you　as　soon　as　possible。Jupiter　and　Madame

　　Sagittarius。〃



　〃Heaven's　sake　don't；　tell　truth；　did　not　look　through　telescope　at

　　all　last　night。Vivian。〃



　〃What　meaning　of　this　swore　oath　broken；　no　gentleman；　coming　at

　　once　for　explanation。Jupiter　and　Madame　Sagittarius。〃



　〃Stop；　sending　boy　messenger　with　full　explanation；　severe　accident

　　last　night；　injured　head；　so　unable　look　for　crab；　grandmother　and

　　scorpion。Vivian。〃



　〃Astounded；　upset；　Madame　says　not　conduct　gentleman；　might　have

　　seen　crab；　grandmother　and　scorpion　with　injured　head；　mere　excuse

　　caput　mortuus　decrepitum　cancer。Sagittarius。〃



　〃Pray　excuse；　look　to…night　without　fail；　Heaven's　sake　cease

　　writing；　grandmother　and　whole　square　amazement；　confusion；　shall

　　go　mad　if　continues。Vivian。〃



　〃Very　well；　but　insist　on　full　letter；　confidence　in　oath　much

　　shaken；　wires　most　shifty；　gross　neglect　of　crab；　grandmother　and

　　scorpion。Sagittarius。〃



　〃Homo　miserum　sed　magnum　est　veritatus　et　praevalebetur。Madame

　　Sagittarius。〃







CHAPTER　XI



MISS　MINERVA　OPENS　HER　BOOK　OF　REVELATION　IN　A　CAB



〃Assure　the　Lord　Chancellor　that　the　last　boy　has　been　and　gonegone

away；　that　is；　Mr。　Ferdinand；　and　that　I　pledge　my　sacred　word　not　to

have　another　telegram　to…day。〃



〃Yes；　sir。　His　lordship　desired　that　you　should　be　informed　that；

according　to　the　law　regulating　public　abominations　and　intolerable

street　noises；　you　was　liable　to〃



〃I　know；　I　know。〃



〃And　that；　by　the　Act　dealing　with　gross　offences　against　the　public

order　and　scandalous　crimes　against　the　peace　of　metropolitan

communities；　you　was　amenable〃



〃Exactly。　Go　to　his　lordship　and　swear〃



〃I　couldn't　do　that　so　soon　again；　sir；　really。　I　swore　only　as　short

ago　as　yesterday；　sir；　by　your　express　order；　but〃



〃I　mean　asseverate　to　his　lordship　that　the　very　last　boy　has　knocked

for　the　very　last　time。〃



〃It　wasn't　so　much　the　knocking；　sir；　his　lordship　complained　of；　as

the　boys　coming　to　the　door　meeting　the　boys　going　away　from　it；　and

blocking　up　the　pavement；　sir；　so　that　no　one　could　get　past　and〃



〃Yes；　yes。　Go　and　asseverate　at　once；　Mr。　Ferdinand。〃



〃Very　well；　sir。　And　Her　Grace；　the　Duchess　of　Camberwell；　who　is

passing　from　one　fit　to　another；　sir；　from　fright　at　the　uproar　and

telegrams　going　to　the　wrong　house；　sir？〃



〃Implore　Her　Grace　to　have　courage　and　to　trust　me　as　a　gentleman　when

I　promise　solemnly　that　the　knocking　shall　not　be　renewed。〃



〃Very　well；　sir。〃



〃Mr。　Ferdinand！〃



〃Sir？〃



〃Have　the　knockers　swathed　in　cotton…wool　at　once。〃



〃Yes；　sir；〃



〃Andfix　a　bulletin　on　the　door。　Wait！　I'll　write　it。〃



The　Prophet　hastened　to　his　writing　table　and；　with　a　hand　that

trembled　violently；　wrote　on　a　card　as　follows：



〃Owner　of　this　house　seriously　ill；　pray　do　not　knock　or　/death/　shall

certainly　ensue。〃



〃There！　Poor　grannie　will　have　peace　now。　Nail　that　up；　Mr。　Ferdinand；

under　the　cotton…wool。〃



〃Very　well；　sir。　Mrs。　Merillia；　sir；　would　be　glad　to　speak　to　you　for

a　moment。　You　remember　I　informed　you？〃



〃I'll　go　to　her　at　once。　But　first　bring　me　a　glass　of　brandy；　Mr。

Ferdinand。　I'm　feeling　extremely　unwell。〃



And　the　Prophet；　who　was　paler　far　than　ashes；　and　beaded　from　top　to

toe　with　perspiration；　sank　down　feebly　upon　a　chair　and　let　his　head

drop　on　the　blotting…pad　that　lay　on　his　writing…table。



When　he　had　swallowed　an　inch　or　two　of　cognac　he　got　up；　pulled

himself　together　with　both　hands；　and　walked；　like　an　elderly　person

afflicted　with　incipient　locomotor　ataxy；　upstairs　into　the　drawing…

room　where　Mrs。　Merillia　was　lying　on　a　sofa；　ministered　to　by　Fancy

Quinglet；　who；　at　the　moment　of　his　entrance；　was　busily　engaged　in

stuffing　a　large　wad　of　cotton…wool　into　the　right　ear　of　her　beloved

mistress。



〃Leave　us　please；　Fancy；〃　said　Mrs。　Merillia；　in　a　voice　that　sounded

much　older　than　usual。　〃And　as　your　head　is　so　bad；　too；　you　had　better

lie　down。〃



〃Thank　you；　ma'am。　If　I　keep　upright；　ma'am；　I　feel　my　head　will　split

asunder。　I　can't　speak　different　nor　feel　other。〃



〃Then　don't　be　upright。〃



〃No；　ma'am。　Them　that　feels　other；　let　them　declare　it！〃　and　Mrs。　Fancy

retired；　holding　both　hands　to　her　temples；　and　uttering　very

distinctly　sundry　stifled　moans。



Mrs。　Merillia　motioned　the　Prophet　to　a　chair；　and；　after　lying　quite

still　for　about　five　minutes　with　her　eyes　tightly　shut；　said　in　a　weak

tone　of　voice；



〃How　many　more　telegrams　do　you　expect；　Hennessey？　You　have　had　twenty…

seven　within　the　last　three　hours。　Can　you　give　me　a　rough　general　idea

of　the　average　number　you　anticipate　will　probably　arrive　every　hour

from　now　till　the　offices　close？〃



〃Grannie；　grannie；　forgive　me！　I　assure　you〃



〃Don't　be　afraid　to　tell　me；　Hennessey。　It　is　much　better　to　know　the

worst；　and　fact　it　bravely。　Will　the　present　average　be　merely

sustained；　or　do　you　expect　the　quantity　to　increase　towards　night？

because　if　so〃



〃Grannie；　there　will　be　no　more。　I　swear　to　you　solemnly　that　I　will

not　have　another　telegram　to…day。　I　will　not　upon　my　sacred　honour。

Nothingnot　wild　horses　evenshall　induce　me。〃



〃Horses！　Then　were　they　racing　tips；　Hennessey？　Yes；　give　me　the　/eau

de　Cologne/　and　fan　me　gently。　Were　they　racing　tips？〃



〃Oh；　grannie；　how　could　you　suppose〃



At　this　moment　Mr。　Ferdinand　entered　softly　and　went　up　to　Mrs。

Merillia。



〃Mr。　Q。　Elisha　Hubsbee；　ma'am。　He　is　deeply　distressed　and　asks　for

news　。　。　。〃



〃The　Central　American　Ambassador's　grandfather；〃　said　Mrs。　Merillia；

reading　the　card　which　Mr。　Ferdinand　handed　to　her。



　〃Shocked　to　hear　you　are　so　ill　that　a　knock　will　finish　you。　Guess

　　you　must　be　far　gone。　Earnest　sympathy。　Have　you　tried　patent

　　morphia　molasses？



Q。　E。　H。〃





〃Ah！　how　things　get　about！　Tell　Mr。　Elisha　Hubsbee　the　knocks　have

nearly　killed　us　all；　Mr。　Ferdinand；　but　we　are　bearing　up　as　well　as

can　be　expected。　If　necessary　we　will　certainly　try