the daisy chain, or aspirations-第30节

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love　him　better；　just　as　I　do；　for　not　being　able　to　bear　to　stay　in
this　room；　where〃

〃Yes；〃　said　Ethel；　mournfully；　〃it　was　a　great　shame　of　me！　　How
could　I？　　Dear　Norman！　how　he　does　grievewhat　love　his　must　have
been！　　But　yet；　Margaret；〃　she　said　impatiently；　and　the　hot　tears
breaking　out；　〃I　cannotcannot　bear　it！　　To　have　him　not　caring　one
bit　for　all　of　us！　　I　want　him　to　triumph！　　I　can't　without　him！〃

〃What；　Ethel；　you；　who　said　you　didn't　care　for　mere　distinction　and
praise？　　Don't　you　think　dear　mamma　would　say　it　was　safer　for　him
not　to　be　delighted　and　triumphant？〃

〃It　is　very　tiresome；〃　said　Ethel；　nearly　convinced；　but　in　a
slightly　petulant　voice。

〃And　does　not　one　love　those　two　dear　boys　to…night！〃　said　Margaret。
〃Norman　not　able　to　rejoice　in　his　victory　without　her；　and　Harry　in
such　an　ecstacy　with　Norman's　honours。　　I　don't　think　I　ever　was　so
fond　of　my　two　brothers。〃

Ethel　smiled；　and　drew　up　her　head；　and　said　no　boys　were　like　them
anywhere；　and　papa　would　be　delighted；　and　so　went　to　bed　happier　in
her　exultation；　and　in　hoping　that　the　holidays　would　make　Norman
himself　again。

Nothing　could　be　better　news　for　Dr。　May；　who　had　never　lost　a　grain
of　the　ancient　school…party…loyalty　that　is　part　of　the　nature　of　the
English　gentleman。　　He　was　a　thorough　Stoneborough　boy；　had　followed
the　politics　of　the　Whichcote　foundation　year　by　year　all　his　life；
and　perhaps；　in　his　heart；　regarded　no　honour　as　more　to　be　prized
than　that　of　Dux　and　Randall　scholar。　　Harry　was　in　his　room　the　next
morning　as　soon　as　ever　he　was　stirring；　a　welcome　guestteased　a
little　at　first；　by　his　pretending　to　take　it　all　as　a　sailor's　prank
to　hoax　him　and　Richard；　and　then　free　to　pour　out　to　delighted　ears
the　whole　history　of　the　examination；　and　of　every　one's
congratulations。

Norman　himself　was　asleep　when　Harry　went　to　give　this　narration。　　He
came　down　late；　and　his　father　rose　to　meet　him　as　he　entered。　　〃My
boy；〃　he　said；　〃I　had　not　expected　this　of　you。　　Well　done；　Norman！〃
and　the　whole　tone　and　gesture　had　a　heartfelt　approval　and　joy　in
them；　that　Ethel　knew　her　brother　was　deeply　thrilled　by；　for　his
colour　deepened；　and　his　lips　quivered　into　something　like　a　smile；
though　he　did　not　lift　his　eyes。

Then　came　Richard's　warm　greeting　and　congratulation；　he；　too；
showing　himself　as　delighted　as　if　the　honours　were　his　own；　and　then
Dr。　May　again；　in　lively　tones；　like　old　times；　laughing　at　Norman
for　sleeping　late；　and　still　not　looking　well　awake；　asking　him　if　he
was　quite　sure　it　was　not　all　a　dream。

〃Well；〃　said　Norman；　〃I　should　think　it　was；　if　it　were　not　that　you
all　believe　it。〃

〃Harry　had　better　go　to　sleep　next；〃　said　Dr。　May；　〃and　see　what
dreaming　will　make　him。　　If　it　makes　Dux　of　Norman；　who　knows　but　it
may　make　Drakes　of　him？　　Ha！　Ethel


　　　　　　　〃Oh；　give　us　for　our　Kings　such　Queens；
　　　　　　　　　　And　for　our　Ducks　such　Drakes。〃


There　had　not　been　such　a　merry　breakfast　for　months。　　There　was　the
old　confusion　of　voices；　the　boys；　Richard；　and　the　doctor　had　much
to　talk　over　of　the　school　doings　of　this　week；　and　there　was　nearly
as　much　laughing　as　in　days　past。　　Ethel　wondered　whether　any　one　but
herself　observed　that　the　voice　most　seldom　heard　was　Norman's。

The　promised　call　was　made　by　Dr。　Hoxton；　and　Mr。　Everard；　an　old
friend；　and　after　their　departure　Dr。　May　came　to　Margaret's　room
with　fresh　accounts；　corroborating　what　Harry　had　said　of　the　clear
knowledge　and　brilliant　talent　that　Norman　had　displayed；　to　a　degree
that　surprised　his　masters；　almost　as　much　as　the　examiners。　　The
copy　of　verses　Dr。　May　brought　with　him；　and　construed　them　to
Margaret；　commenting　all　the　way　on　their　ease；　and　the　fullness　of
thought；　certainly　remarkable　in　a　boy　of　sixteen。

They　were　then　resigned　to　Ethel's　keeping；　and　she　could　not　help
imparting　her　admiration　to　their　author；　with　some　apology　for
vexing　him　again。

〃I　don't　want　to　be　cross；〃　said　Norman；　whom　these　words　roused　to　a
sense　that　he　had　been　churlish　last　night；　〃but　I　cannot　help　it。　　I
wish　people　would　not　make　such　a　fuss　about　it。〃

〃I　don't　think　you　can　be　well；　Norman。〃

〃Nonsense。　　There's　nothing　the　matter　with　me。〃

〃But　I　don't　understand　your　not　caring　at　all；　and　not　being　the
least　pleased。〃

〃It　only　makes　it　worse；〃　said　Norman；　〃I　only　feel　as　if　I　wanted　to
be　out　of　the　way。　　My　only　comfortable　time　yesterday　was　on　that
bench　in　the　cool　quiet　cloister。　　I　don't　think　I　could　have　got
through　without　that；　when　they　left　me　in　peace；　till　Cheviot　and
Harry　came　to　rout　me　up；　and　I　knew　it　was　all　coming。〃

〃Ah！　you　have　overworked　yourself；　but　it　was　for　something。　　You
have　given　papa　such　pleasure　and　comfort；　as　you　can't　help　being
glad　of。　　That　is　very　different　from　us　foolish　young　ones　and　our
trumpeting。〃

〃What　comfort　can　it　be？　　I've　not　been　the　smallest　use　all　this
time。　　When　he　was　ill；　I　left　him　to　Ernescliffe；　and　lay　on　the
floor　like　an　ass；　and　if　he　were　to　ask　me　to　touch　his　arm；　I
should　be　as　bad　again。　　A　fine　thing　for　me　to　have　talked　all　that
arrogant　stuff　about　Richard！　　I　hate　the　thought　of　it；　and；　as　if
to　make　arrows　and　barbs　of　it；　here's　Richard　making　as　much　of　this
as　if　it　was　a　double　first　class！　　He　afraid　to　be　compared　with　me；
indeed！〃

〃Norman；　indeed；　this　is　going　too　far。　　We　can't　be　as　useful　as　the
elder　ones；　and　when　you　know　how　papa　was　vexed　about　Richard；　you
must　be　glad　to　have　pleased　him。〃

〃If　I　were　he；　it　would　only　make　me　miss　her　more。　　I　believe　he
only　makes　much　of　me　that　he　may　not　disappoint　me。〃

〃I　don't　think　so。　　He　is　really　glad；　and　the　more　because　she　would
have　been　so　pleased。　　He　said　it　would　have　been　a　happy　day　for
her；　and　there　was　more　of　the　glad　look　than　the　sorry　one。　　It　was
the　glistening　look　that　comes　when　he　is　watching　baby；　or　hearing
Margaret　say　pretty　things　to　her。　　You　see　it　is　the　first　bright
morning　we　have　had。〃

〃Yes；〃　said　Norman；　〃perhaps　it　was；　but　I　don't　know。　　I　thought
half　of　it　was　din。〃

〃Oh；　Norman！〃

〃And　another　thing；　Ethel；　I　don't　feel　as　if　I　had　fairly　earned　it。
Forder　or　Cheviot　ought　to　have　had　it。　　They　are　both　more　really
good　scholars　than　I　am；　and　have　always　been　above　me。　　There　was
nothing　I　really　knew　better；　except　those　historical　questions　that
no　one　reckoned　on；　and　not　living　at　home　with　their　sisters　and
books；　they　had　no　such　chance；　and　it　is　very　hard　on　them；　and　I
don't　like　it。〃

〃Well；　but　you　really　and　truly　beat　them　in　everything。〃

〃Ay；　by　chance。　　There　were　lots　of　places　in　construing；　where　I
should　have　broken　down　if　I　had　happened　to　be　set　on　in　them；　it
was　only　a　wonder　I　did　not　in　that　chorus；　for　I　had　only　looked　at
it　twice；　but　Everard　asked　me　nothing　but　what　I　knew；　and　now　and
then　I　get　into　a　funny　state；　when　nothing　is　too　hard　for　me；　and
that　was　how　it　was　yesterday　evening。　　Generally；　I　feel　as　dull　as
a　post；〃　said　Norman；　yawning　and　stretching；　〃I　could　not　make　a
nonsense　hexameter　this　minute；　if　I　was　to　die　for　it。〃

〃A　sort　of　Berserkar　fury！〃　said　Ethel；　〃like　that　night　you　did　the
coral…worm　verses。　　It's　very　odd。　　Are　you　sure　you　are　well；　dear
Norman？〃

To　which　he　answered；　with　displeasure；　that　he　was　as　well　as
possible；　ordered　her　not　to　go　and　make　any　more　fuss；　and　left　her
hastily。　　She　was　unhappy；　and　far　from　satisfied；　she　had　never
known　his　temper　so　much　affected；　and　was　much　puzzled；　but　she　was
too　much　afraid　of　vexing　him；　to　impart　her　perplexity　even　to
Margaret。　　However；　the　next　day；　Sunday；　as　she　was　reading　to
Margaret　after　church；　her　father　came　in；　and　the　first　thing　he
said　was；　〃I　want　to　know　what　you　think　of　Norman。〃

〃How　do　you　mean？〃　said　Margaret；　〃in　health　or　spirits？〃

〃Both；〃　said　Dr。　May。　　〃Poor　boy！　he　has　never　held　up　his　head　since
October；　and；　at　his　age；　that　is　hardly　natural。　　He　goes　moping
about；　has　lost　flesh　and　appetite；　and　looks　altogether　out　of
older；　shooting　up　like　a　Maypole　too。〃

〃Mind　and　body；〃　said　Margaret；　while　Ethel　gazed　intently　at　her
father；　wondering　whether　she　ought　to　speak；　for　Margaret　did　not
know　half　what　she　did；　nothing　about　the　bad　nights；　nor　what　he
called　the　〃funny　state。〃

〃Yes；　both。　　I　fancied　it　was　only　his　rapid　growth；　and　the
excitement　of　this　examination；　and　that　it　would　go　off；　but　I　think
there's　more　amiss。　　He　was　lounging　about　doing　nothing；　when　the
girls　were　gone　to　school　after　dinner；　and　I　asked　him　to　walk　down
with　me　to　the　Almshouses。　　He　did　not　seem　very　willing；　but　he
went；　and　presently；　as　I　had　hold　of　his　arm；　I　felt　him　shivering；
and　saw　him　turn　as　pale　as　a　sheet。　　As　soon　as　I　noticed　it；　he
flushed　crimson；　and　would　not　hear　of　turning　back；　stoutly
protesting　he　was　quite　well；　but　I　saw　his　hand　was　quivering　even
when　I　got　into　church。　　Why；　Ethel；　you　have　turned　as　red　as　he
did。〃

〃Then　he　has　done　it！〃　exclaimed　Ethel；　in　a　smothered　voice。

〃What　do　you　mean？　　Speak；　Ethel。〃

〃He　has　gone　past　itthe　place；〃　whispered　she。

The　doctor　made