the daisy chain, or aspirations-第176节

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which　was　most　upon　their　minds；　since　she　had　never　before　witnessed
one　of　the　seizures；　that　were　only　too　ordinary　matters　in　the　eyes
of　the　home　party。　　No　one　but　Dr。　May　and　Ethel　should　go。　　Richard
undertook　to　tell　the　rest；　and　the　gig　making　its　appearance；　Ethel
felt　that　the　peculiarly　kind　manner　with　which　the　bishop　pressed
her　hand；　and　gave　them　all　good　wishes；　was　like　a　continuation　of
his　blessing　to　aid　her　in　her　home　scene　of　trial。

Perhaps；　it　was　well　for　her　that　her　part　in　the　consecration
festivities　should　end　here；　at　least　so　thought　Mr。　Wilmot；　who；
though　very　sorry　for　the　cause；　could　not　wish　her　to　have　been
present　at　the　luncheon。　　She　had　not　thought　of　self　hitherto；　the
church　was　the　gift　of　Alan　and　Margaret；　the　work　of　preparing　the
people　belonged　to　all　alike；　and　she　did　not　guess　that；　in　the
sight　of　others；　she　was　not　the　nobody　that　she　believed　herself。
Her　share　in　the　work　at　Cocksmoor　was　pretty　well　known；　and　Dr。
Hoxton　could　not　allow　a　public　occasion　to　pass　without　speeches；
such　as　must　either　have　been　very　painful；　or　very　hurtful　to　her。
The　absence　of　herself　and　her　father；　however；　permitted　a　more　free
utterance　to　the　general　feeling；　and　things　were　said；　that　did
indeed　make　the　rest　of　the　family　extremely　hot　and　uncomfortable；
but　which　gave　them　extreme　pleasure。　　Norman　was　obliged　to　spare
Richard　the　answer；　and　said　exactly　what　he　ought；　and　so
beautifully；　that　Meta　could　not　find　it　in　her　heart　to　echo　the
fervent　wish；　which　he　whispered　as　he　sat　down；　that　speechifying
could　be　abolished　by　Act　of　Parliament。

Mrs。　Arnott　began　to　perceive　that　her　nephew　was　something　to　be
proud　of；　and　to　understand　how　much　was　sacrificed；　while　George
Rivers　expressed　his　opinion　to　her　that　Norman　would　be　a　crack
speaker　in　the　House；　and　he　hoped　she　would　say　everything　to　hinder
his　going　out；　for　it　was　a　regular　shame　to　waste　him　on　the
niggers。

Owing　to　George　having　constituted　himself　her　squire；　Mrs。　Arnott
had　not　arrived　at　an　understanding　of　the　state　of　affairs　at　home；
but；　as　soon　as　they　rose　up　from　luncheon；　and　she　learned　the　truth
from　Richard　and　Mary；　nothing　would　hinder　her　from　walking　home　at
once　to　see　whether　she　could　be　useful。　　Mary　was　easily　persuaded
to　remain；　for　she　was　accustomed　to　Margaret's　having　these　attacks；
and　had　always　been　kept　out　of　her　room　the　while；　so　she　had　little
uneasiness　to　prevent　her　from　being　very　happy；　in　receiving　in　her
own　simple；　good…humoured　way　all　the　attentions　that　lapsed　upon　her
in　the　place　of　her　elder　sisters。

〃Cocksmoor　really　has　a　church！〃　was　note　enough　of　joy　for　her；　and
no　one　could　look　at　her　round　face　without　seeing　perfect　happiness。
Moreover；　when　after　evening　service；　the　November　mist　turned　into
decided　rain；　she　was　as　happy　as　a　queen　in　her　foresight；　which　had
provided　what　seemed　an　unlimited　supply　of　cloaks　and　umbrellas。
She　appeared　to　have　an　original　genius　for　making　the　right　people
give　a　lift　in　their　carriages　to　the　distressed；　and；　regarding　the
Abbotstoke　britska　as　her　own；　packed　in　Mrs。　Anderson　and　Fanny；　in
addition　to　all　their　own　little　ones；　Meta　thrusting　Miss　Bracy　into
the　demi…corner　destined　for　herself　at　the　last　minute；　and；
remaining　with　Mary；　the　only　ladies　obliged　to　walk　back　to
Stoneborough。　　So　delighted　were　they　〃at　the　fun；〃　that　it　might
have　been　thought　the　most　charming　of　adventures；　and　they　laughed
all　the　more　at　the　lack　of　umbrellas。　　They　went　to　Mrs。　Elwood's；
divested　themselves　of　all　possible　finery；　and　tucked　up　the　rest；
Meta　was　rolled　up　from　head　to　foot　in　a　great　old　plaid　shawl　of
Mrs。　Elwood's；　and　Mary　had　a　cloak　of　Richard's；　the　one　took
Norman's　arm；　the　other　Dr。　Spencer's；　and　they　trudged　home　through
the　darkness　and　the　mud　in　the　highest　glee；　quite　sorry　when　the
carriage　met　them　half…way。

It　was　the　last　mirth　that　they　enjoyed　for　many　weeks。　　When　they
reached　home；　a　sense　of　self…reproach　for　their　glee　thrilled　over
them；　when　they　found　a　sort　of　hush　pervading　the　drawing…room；　and
saw　the　faces　of　awe　and　consternation；　worn　by　Blanche　and　George
Rivers。

〃It　was　a　much　worse　attack　than　usual；　and　it　did　not　go　off；〃　was
all　that　Blanche　knew；　but　her　father　had　desired　to　be　told　when　Dr。
Spencer　came　home；　and　she　went　up　with　the　tidings。

This　brought　Flora　down；　looking　dreadfully　pale；　and　with　her　voice
sunk　away　as　it　had　been　when　she　lost　her　child。　　Her　husband
started　up；　exclaiming　at　her　aspect；　she　let　him　support　her　to　the
sofa；　and　gave　the　few　particulars。　　Margaret　had　been　as　placid　and
comfortable　as　usual；　till　nurse　came　to　dress　her；　but　the　first
move　had　brought　on　the　faintness　and　loss　of　breath。　　It　did　not
yield　to　remedies；　and　she　had　neither　looked　nor　spoken　since；　only
moaned。　　Flora　thought　her　father　much　alarmed；　and　then；　after　an
interval；　she　began　to　entreat　that　they　might　stay　there；　sending
Miss　Bracy　and　the　children　to　the　Grange　to　make　room。

Meantime；　Dr。　Spencer　had　come　to　the　sick…room；　but　he　could　only
suggest　remedies　that　were　already　in　course　of　application　to　the
insensible　sufferer。　　Mrs。　Arnott　and　Ethel　were　watching；　and　trying
everything　to　relieve　her；　but　with　little　effect；　and　Ethel
presently　stood　by　the　fire　with　her　father；　as　Dr。　Spencer　turned
towards　him；　and　he　said；　in　a　very　low；　but　calm　voice；　〃It　won't
doI　believe　it　is　the　death…stroke。〃

〃Not　immediate；〃　said　Dr。　Spencer。

〃No；〃　said　Dr。　May；　and　he　quietly　spoke　of　what　the　disease　had
effected；　and　what　yet　remained　for　it　to　do；　ere　the　silver　bowl
should　be　broken。

Dr。　Spencer　put　in　a　word　of　agreement。

〃Will　there　be　no　rally？〃　said　Ethel；　in　the　same　tone。

〃Probably　not；〃　said　Dr。　May；　〃the　brain　is　generally　reached　at　this
stage。　　I　have　seen　it　coming　for　a　long　time。　　The　thing　was　done
seven　years　ago。　　There　was　a　rally　for　a　time　when　youth　was　strong；
but　suspense　and　sorrow　accelerated　what　began　from　the　injury　to　the
spine。〃

Dr。　Spencer　bowed　his　head；　and　looked　at　him　anxiously；　saying；　〃I
do　not　think　there　will　be　much　acute　suffering。〃

〃I　fear　it　may　be　as　trying；〃　said　Dr。　May；　sighing；　and　then　turning
to　Ethel；　and　throwing　his　arm　round　her；　〃May　God　make　it　easy　to
her；　and　grant　us　'patient　hearts。'　　We　will　not　grudge　her　to　all
that　she　loves　best；　my　Ethel。〃

Ethel　clung　to　him；　as　if　to　derive　strength　from　him。　　But　the
strength　that　was　in　them　then　did　not　come　from　earth。　　Dr。　Spencer
wrung　his　hand；　and　stepped　back　to　the　bed　to　try　another　resource。
Vain　again；　they　only　seemed　to　be　tormenting　her；　and　the　silent
helplessness　prevailed　again。　　Then　Dr。　May　went　down　to　Flora；　told
her　the　true　state　of　the　case；　and　urged　on　her　to　give　up　her　plan
of　remaining。　　George　joined　with　him；　and　she　yielded　submissively；
but　would　not　be　refused　going　up　once　again　and　kissing　her　sister；
standing　beside　her　gazing　at　her；　till　her　father　came　softly　and
drew　her　away。　　〃I　shall　be　here　to…morrow；〃　she　said　to　Ethel；　and
went。

The　morrow；　however；　brought　no　Flora。　　The　agitation　and　distress　of
that　day　had　broken　her　down　completely；　and　she　was　so　ill　as　to　be
unable　to　move。　　Her　aunt　went　at　once　to　see　her；　and　finding　that
her　presence　at　the　Grange　relieved　some　of　Dr。　May's　anxieties；
chiefly　devoted　herself　to　her。　　Flora　was　grateful　and　gentle；　but
as　silent　and　impenetrable　as　ever；　while　day　after　day　she　lay　on
her　couch；　uncomplaining　and　undemonstrative；　visited　by　her　father；
and　watched　over　by　her　aunt　and　sister…in…law；　who　began　to　know
each　other　much　better；　though　Flora　less　than　ever；　in　that　deep
fixed　grief。　　She　only　roused　herself　to　return　her　husband's
affection；　or　to　listen　to　the　daily　reports　of　Margaret。　　Poor
George；　he　was　very　forlorn；　though　Meta　did　her　best　to　wait　on　him；
and　he　rode　over　twice　a　day　to　inquire　at　Stoneborough。

The　doctors　were　right；　and　the　consecration　morning　was　her　last　of
full　consciousness。　　From　the　hour　when　she　had　heard　the　sound　of
Alan's　bells；　her　ears　were　closed　to　earthly　sounds。　　There　was　very
little　power　of　intercourse　with　her；　as　she　lingered　on　the　borders
of　the　land　very　far　away；　where　skill　and　tenderness　could　not
either　reach　body　or　spirit。　　Often　the　watchers　could　not　tell
whether　she　was　conscious；　or　only　incapacitated　from　expression；　by
the　fearful　weight　on　her　breath；　which　caused　a　restlessness　most
piteous　in　the　exhausted　helpless　frame；　wasted　till　the　softest
touch　was　anguish。　　Now　and　then　came　precious　gleams　when　a　familiar
voice；　or　some　momentary　alleviation　would　gain　a　smile；　or　thanks；
and　they　thought　her　less　restless　when　Richard　read　prayers　beside
her；　but　words　were　very　rare；　only　now　and　then　a　name；　and　when　in
most　distress；　〃it　will　be　soon　over；〃　〃it　will　soon　be　over；〃
occurred　so　often；　that　they　began　to　think　it　once　her　solace；　and
now　repeated　habitually　without　a　meaning。

They　could　not　follow　her　into　the　valley　of　the　shadow　of　death；　but
could　only　watch　the　frail　earthly　prison…house