the daisy chain, or aspirations-第158节
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〃No; I remember now; not where it was justly due。 Papa;〃 she said;
pausing; as to recall her recollection; 〃what did I do? I must have
done something very unkind to make him go away and leave me。〃
〃I insisted on his leaving you; my dear。 You seemed oppressed; and
his affectionate ways were doing you harm; so I was hardhearted; and
turned him out; sadly against his will。〃
〃Poor George!〃 said Flora; 〃has he been left to bear it alone all
this time? How much distressed he must have been。 I must have vexed
him grievously。 You don't guess how fond he was of her。 I must go
to him at once。〃
〃That is right; my dear。〃
〃Don't praise me;〃 said she; as if she could not bear it。 〃All that
is left for me is to do what I can for him。〃
Dr。 May felt cheered。 He was sure that hope must again rise out of
unselfish love and duty。
Their return awoke George; who started; half sitting up; wondering
why he was spending the night in so unusual a manner; and why Flora
looked so pale; in the morning light; with her loosened; drooping
hair。
She went straight to him; and; kneeling by his side; said; 〃George;
forgive!〃 The same moment he had caught her to his bosom; but so
impressed was his tardy mind with the peril of talking to her; that
he held her in his arms without a single word; till Dr。 May had
unclosed his lipsa sign would not sufficehe must have a sentence
to assure him; and then it was such joy to have her restored; and his
fondness and solicitude were so tender and eager in their clumsiness;
that his father…in…law was touched to the heart。
Flora was quite herself again; in presence of mind and power of
dealing with him; and Dr。 May left them to each other; and went to
his own room; for such rest as sorrow; sympathy; and the wakening
city; would permit him。
When the house was astir in the morning; and the doctor had met Meta
in the breakfast…room; and held with her a sad; affectionate
conversation; George came down with a fair report of his wife; and
took her father to see her。
That night had been like an illness to her; and; though perfectly
composed; she was feeble and crushed; keeping the room darkened; and
reluctant to move or speak。 Indeed; she did not seem able to give
her attention to any one's voice; except her husband's。 When Dr。
May; or Meta; spoke to her; she would miss what they said; beg their
pardon; and ask them to repeat it; and sometimes; even then; become
bewildered。 They tried reading to her; but she did not seem to
listen; and her half…closed eye had the expression of listless
dejection; that her father knew betokened that; even as last night;
her heart refused to accept promises of comfort as meant for her。
For George; however; her attention was always ready; and was
perpetually claimed。 He was forlorn and at a loss without her; every
moment; and; in the sorrow which he too felt most acutely; could not
have a minute's peace unless soothed by her presence; he was
dependent on her to a degree which amazed and almost provoked the
doctor; who could not bear to have her continually harassed and
disturbed; and yet was much affected by witnessing so much
tenderness; especially in Flora; always the cold utilitarian member
of his family。
In the middle of the day she rose and dressed; because George was
unhappy at having to sit without her; though only in the next room。
She sat in the large arm…chair; turned away from the blinded windows;
never speaking nor moving; save when he came to her; to make her look
at his letters and notes; when she would; with the greatest patience
and sweetness; revise them; suggest word or sentence; rouse herself
to consider each petty detail; and then sink back into her attitude
of listless dejection。 To all besides; she appeared totally
indifferent; gently courteous to Meta and to her father; when they
addressed her; but otherwise showing little consciousness whether
they were in the room; and yet; when something was passing about her
father's staying or returning; she rose from her seat; came up to him
before he was aware; and said; 〃Papa! papa! you will not leave me!〃
in such an imploring tone; that if he had ever thought of quitting
her; he could not have done so。
He longed to see her left to perfect tranquillity; but such could not
be in London。 Though theirs was called a quiet house; the rushing
stream of traffic wearied his country ears; the door bell seemed
ceaselessly ringing; and though Meta bore the brunt of the notes and
messages; great numbers necessarily came up to Mr。 Rivers; and of
these Flora was not spared one。 Dr。 May had his share too of
messages and business; and friends and relations; the Rivers'
kindred; always ready to take offence with their rich connections;
and who would not be satisfied with inquiries; at the door; but must
see Meta; and would have George fetched down to themold aunts; who
wanted the whole story of the child's illness; and came imagining
there was something to be hushed up; Lady Leonora extremely polite;
but extremely disgusted at the encounter with them; George ready to
be persuaded to take every one up to see his wife; and the
prohibition to be made by Dr。 May over and over againit was a most
tedious; wearing afternoon; and at last; when the visitors had gone;
and George had hurried back to his wife; Dr。 May threw himself into
an arm…chair and said; 〃Oh; Meta; sorrow weighs more heavily in town
than in the country!〃
〃Yes!〃 said Meta。 〃If one only could go out and look at the flowers;
and take poor Flora up a nosegay!〃
〃I don't think it would make much difference to her;〃 sighed the
doctor。
〃Yes; I think it would;〃 said Meta; 〃it did to me。 The sights there
speak of the better sights。〃
〃The power to look must come from within;〃 said Dr。 May; thinking of
his poor daughter。
〃Ay;〃 said Meta; 〃as Mr。 Ernescliffe said; 'heaven is as near!'
But the skirts of heaven are more easily traced in our mountain view
than here; where; if I looked out of window; I should only see that
giddy string of carriages and people pursuing each other!〃
〃Well; we shall get her home as soon as she is able to move; and I
hope it may soothe her。 What a turmoil it is! There has not been
one moment without noise in the twenty…two hours I have been here!〃
〃What would you say if you were in the city?〃
〃Ah! there's no talking of it; but if I had been a fashionable London
physician; as my father…in…law wanted to make me; I should have been
dead long ago!〃
〃No; I think you would have liked it very much。〃
〃Why?〃
〃Love's a flower that will not die;〃 repeated Meta; half smiling。
〃You would have found so much good to do〃
〃And so much misery to rend one's heart;〃 said Dr。 May。 〃But; after
all; I suppose there is only a certain capacity of feeling。〃
〃It is within; not without; as you said;〃 returned Meta。
〃Ha; there's another!〃 cried Dr。 May; almost petulant at the sound of
the bell again; breaking into the conversation that was a great
refreshment。
〃It was Sir Henry Walkinghame's ring;〃 said Meta。 〃It is always his
time of day。〃
The doctor did not like it the better。
Sir Henry sent up a message to ask whether he could see Mr。 or Miss
Rivers。
〃I suppose we must;〃 said Meta; looking at the doctor。 〃Lady
Walkinghame must be anxious about Flora。〃
She blushed greatly; fancying that Dr。 May was putting his own
construction on the heightened colour which she could not control。
Sir Henry came in; just what he ought to be; kindly anxious; but not
overwhelming; and with a ready; pleased recognition of the doctor; as
an old acquaintance of his boyhood。 He did not stay many minutes;
but there was a perceptible difference between his real sympathy and
friendly regard only afraid of obtruding; and the oppressive
curiosity of their former visitors。 Dr。 May felt it due; both from
kindness and candour; to say something in his praise when he was
gone。
〃That is a sensible superior man;〃 he said。 〃He will be an
acquisition when he takes up his abode at Drydale。〃
〃Yes;〃 said Meta; a very simple yes; from which nothing could be
gathered。
The funeral was fixed for Monday; the next day but one; at the church
where Mr。 Rivers had been buried。 No one was invited to be present;
Ethel wrote that; much as she wished it; she could not leave
Margaret; and; as the whole party were to return home on the
following day; they should soon see Flora。
Flora had laid aside all privileges of illness after the first day;
she came downstairs to breakfast and dinner; and though looking
wretchedly ill; and speaking very low and feebly; she was as much as
ever the mistress of her house。 Her father could never draw her into
conversation again on the subject nearest his heart; and could only
draw the sad conclusion that her state of mind was unchanged; from
the dreary indifference with which she allowed every word of cheer to
pass by unheeded; as if she could not bear to look beyond the grave。
He had some hope in the funeral; which she was bent on attending; and
more in the influence of Margaret; and the counsel of Richard; or of
Mr。 Wllmot。
The burial; however; failed to bring any peaceful comfort to the