the daisy chain, or aspirations-第129节

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！


moment　exclaiming；　〃Poor　little　Meta！〃　he　hurried　away。

A　gloom　fell　on　those　who　remained；　for；　besides　their　sympathy　for
Meta；　and　their　liking　for　her　kind　old　father；　there　was　that　one
unacknowledged　heartache；　which；　though　in　general　bravely　combated；
lay　in　wait　always　ready　to　prey　on　them。　　Hector　stole　round　to　sit
by　Margaret；　and　Dr。　Spencer　muttered；　〃This　will　never　do；〃　and　sent
Tom　to　fetch　some　papers　lying　on　his　table；　whence　he　read　them　some
curious　accounts　that　he　had　just　received　from　his　missionary
friends　in　India。

They　were　interested；　but　in　a　listening　mood；　that　caused　a
universal　start　when　the　bell　again　sounded。　　This　time；　James
reported　that　the　servant　from　the　Grange　said　his　master　was　very
illhe　had　brought　a　letter　to　post　for　Mr。　George　Rivers；　and　here
was　a　note　for　Miss　Ethel。　　It　was　the　only　note　Ethel　had　ever
received　from　her　father；　and　contained　these　few　words：


〃DEAR　E。；

〃I　believe　this　attack　will　be　the　last。　　Come　to　Meta；　and　bring　my
things。
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　R。　M。〃


Ethel　put　her　hands　to　her　forehead。　　It　was　as　if　she　had　been　again
plunged　into　the　stunned　dream　of　misery　of　four　years　ago；　and　her
sensation　was　of　equal　bewilderment　and　uselessness；　but　it　was　but
for　a　momentthe　next　she　was　in　a　state　of　over…bustle　and
eagerness。　　She　wanted　to　fly　about　and　hasten　to　help　Meta；　and
could　hardly　obey　the　word　and　gesture　by　which　Margaret　summoned　her
to　her　side。

〃Dear　Ethel；　you　must　calm　yourself；　or　you　will　not　be　of　use。〃

〃I？　　I　can't　be　of　any　use！　　Oh；　if　you　could　go！　　If　Flora　were　but
here！　　But　I　must　go；　Margaret。〃

〃I　will　put　up　your　father's　things；〃　said　Dr。　Spencer；　in　a　soothing
tone。　　〃The　carriage　cannot　be　ready　in　a　moment；　so　that　there　will
be　full　time。〃

Mary　and　Miss　Bracy　prepared　Ethel's　own　goods；　which　she　would
otherwise　have　forgotten；　and　Margaret；　meanwhile；　detained　her　by
her　side；　trying　to　calm　and　encourage　her　with　gentle　words　of
counsel；　that　might　hinder　her　from　giving　way　to　the　flurry　of
emotion　that　had　seized　her；　and　prevent　her　from　thinking　herself
certain　to　be　useless。

Adams　was　to　drive　her　thither　in　the　gig；　and　it　presently　came　to
the　door。　　Dr。　Spencer　wrapped　her　up　well　in　cloaks　and　shawls；　and
spoke　words　of　kindly　cheer　in　her　ear　as　she　set　off。　　The　fresh
night　air　blew　pleasantly　on　her；　the　stars　glimmered　in　full　glory
overhead；　and　now　and　then　her　eye　was　caught　by　the　rocket…like
track　of　a　shooting…star。　　Orion　was　rising　slowly　far　in　the　east；
and　bringing　to　her　mind　the　sailor…boy　under　the　southern　sky；　if；
indeed；　he　were　not　where　sun　and　stars　no　more　are　the　light。　　It
was　strange　that　the　thought　came　more　as　soothing　than　as　acute
pain；　she　could　bear　to　think　of　him　thus　in　her　present　frame；　as
long　as　she　had　not　to　talk　of　him。　　Under　those　solemn　stars；　the
life　everlasting　seemed　to　overpower　the　sense　of　this　mortal　life；
and　Ethel's　agitation　was　calmed　away。

The　old　cedar…tree　stood　up　in　stately　blackness　against　the　sky；　and
the　lights　in　the　house　glanced　behind　it。　　The　servants　looked
rather　surprised　to　see　Ethel；　as　if　she　were　not　expected；　and
conducted　her　to　the　great　drawing…room；　which　looked　the　more
desolate　and　solitary；　from　the　glare　of　lamplight；　falling　on　the
empty　seats　which　Ethel　had　lately　seen　filled　with　a　glad　home
party。　　She　was　looking　round；　thinking　whether　to　venture　up　to
Meta's　room；　and　there　summon　Bellairs；　when　Meta　came　gliding　in；
and　threw　her　arms　round　her。　　Ethel　could　not　speak；　but　Meta's
voice　was　more　cheerful　than　she　had　expected。　　〃How　kind　of　you；
dear　Ethel！〃

〃Papa　sent　for　me；〃　said　Ethel。

〃He　is　so　kind！　　Can　Margaret　spare　you？〃

〃Oh；　yes；　but　you　must　leave　me。　　You　must　want　to　be　with　him。〃

〃He　never　lets　me　come　in　when　he　has　these　attacks；〃　said　Meta。　　〃If
he　only　would！　　But　will　you　come　up　to　my　room？　　That　is　nearer。〃

〃Is　papa　with　him？〃

〃Yes。〃

Meta　wound　her　arms　round　Ethel；　and　led　her　up　to　her　sitting…room；
where　a　book　lay　on　the　table。　　She　said　that　her　father　had　seemed
weary　and　torpid；　and　had　sat　still　until　almost　their　late　dinner…
hour；　when　he　seemed　to　bethink　himself　of　dressing；　and　had　risen。
She　thought　he　walked　weakly；　and　rather　tottering；　and　had　run　to
make　him　lean　on　her；　which　he　did；　as　far　as　his　own　room　door。
There　he　had　kissed　her；　and　thanked　her；　and　murmured　a　word　like
blessing。　　She　had　not；　however；　been　alarmed；　until　his　servant　had
come　to　tell　her　that　he　had　another　seizure。

Ethel　asked　whether　she　had　seen　Dr。　May　since　he　had　been　with　her
father。　　She　had；　but　Ethel　was　surprised　to　find　that　she　had　not
taken　in　the　extent　of　his　fears。　　She　had　become　so　far　accustomed
to　these　attacks；　that；　though　anxious　and　distressed；　she　did　not
apprehend　more　than　a　few　days'　weakness；　and　her　chief　longing　was
to　be　of　use。　　She　was　speaking　cheerfully　of　beginning　her　nursing
to…morrow；　and　of　her　great　desire　that　her　papa　would　allow　her　to
sit　up　with　him；　when　there　was　a　slow；　reluctant　movement　of　the
lock　of　the　door；　and　the　two　girls　sprang　to　their　feet；　as　Dr。　May
opened　it；　and　Ethel　read　his　countenance　at　once。

Not　so　Meta。　　〃How　is　he？　　May　I　go　to　him？〃　cried　she。

〃Not　now；　my　dear；〃　said　Dr。　May；　putting　his　hand　on　her　shoulder；
in　a　gentle；　detaining　manner；　that　sent　a　thrill　of　trembling
through　her　frame；　though　she　did　not　otherwise　move。　　She　only
clasped　her　hands　together；　and　looked　up　into　his　face。　　He　answered
the　look。　　〃Yes；　my　dear；　the　struggle　is　over。〃

Ethel　came　near；　and　put　her　arm　round　Meta's　waist；　as　if　to
strengthen　her；　as　she　stood　quite　passive　and　still。

Dr。　May　seemed　to　think　it　best　that　all　should　be　told；　but；　though
intently　watching　Meta；　he　directed　his　words　to　his　own　daughter。
〃Thank　Heaven；　it　has　been　shorter；　and　less　painful；　than　I　had
dared　to　hope。〃

Meta　tried　to　speak；　but　could　not　bring　out　the　words；　and；　with　an
imploring　look　at　Ethel；　as　if　to　beg　her　to　make　them　clear　for　her；
she　inarticulately　murmured；　〃Oh！　why　did　you　not　call　me？〃

〃I　could　not。　　He　would　not　let　me。　　His　last　conscious　word　to　me
was　not　to　let　you　see　him　suffer。〃

Meta　wrung　her　clasped　hands　together　in　mute　anguish。　　Dr。　May
signed　to　Ethel　to　guide　her　back　to　the　sofa；　but　the　movement
seemed　so　far　to　rouse　her；　that　she　said；　〃I　should　like　to　go　to
bed。〃

〃Rightthe　best　thing；〃　said　Dr。　May；　and　he　whispered　to　Ethel；　〃Go
with　her；　but　don't　try　to　rouse　herdon't　talk　to　her。　　Come　back
to　me；　presently。〃

He　did　not　even　shake　hands　with　Meta；　nor　wish　her　good…night；　as
she　disappeared　into　her　own　room。

Bellairs　undressed　her；　and　Ethel　stood　watching；　till　the　young
head；　under　the　load　of　sorrow；　so　new　to　it；　was　laid　on　the　pillow。
Bellairs　asked　her　if　she　would　have　a　light。

〃No；　no；　thank　youthe　dark　and　alone。　　Good…night；〃　said　Meta。
Ethel　went　back　to　the　sitting…room；　where　her　father　was　standing　at
the　window；　looking　out　into　the　night。　　He　turned　as　she　came　in；
folded　her　in　his　arms；　and　kissed　her　forehead。　　〃And　how　is　the
poor　little　dear？〃　he　asked。

〃The　same；〃　said　Ethel。　　〃I　can't　bear　to　leave　her　alone；　and　to
have　said　nothing　to　comfort　her。〃

〃It　is　too　soon　as　yet；〃　said　Dr。　May〃her　mind　has　not　taken　it　in。
I　hope　she　will　sleep　all　night；　and　have　more　strength　to　look　at　it
when　she　wakens。〃

〃She　was　utterly　unprepared。〃

〃I　could　not　make　her　understand　me；〃　said　Dr。　May。

〃And；　oh；　papa；　what　a　pity　she　was　not　there！〃

〃It　was　no　sight　for　her；　till　the　last　few　minutes；　and　his　whole
mind　seemed　bent　on　sparing　her。　　What　tenderness　it　has　been。〃

〃Must　we　leave　her　to　herself　all　night？〃

〃Better　so；〃　said　Dr。　May。　　〃She　has　been　used　to　loneliness；　and　to
thrust　companionship　on　her　would　be　only　harassing。〃

Ethel；　who　scarcely　knew　what　it　was　to　be　alone；　looked　as　if　she
did　not　understand。

〃I　used　to　try　to　force　consolation　on　people；〃　said　Dr。　May；　〃but　I
know；　now；　that　it　can　only　be　done　by　following　their　bent。〃

〃You　have　seen　so　many　sorrows；〃　said　Ethel。

〃I　never　understood　till　I　felt；〃　said　Dr。　May。　　〃Those　few　first
days　were　a　lesson。〃

〃I　did　not　think　you　knew　what　was　passing；〃　said　Ethel。

〃I　doubt　whether　any　part　of　my　life　is　more　distinctly　before　me
than　those　two　days；〃　said　Dr。　May。　　〃Flora　coming　in　and　out；　and
poor　Alan　sitting　by　me；　but　I　don't　believe　I　had　any　will。　　I　could
no　more　have　moved　my　mind　than　my　broken　arm；　and　I　verily　think；
Ethel；　that；　but　for　that　merciful　torpor；　I　should　have　been
frantic。　　It　taught　me　never　to　disturb　grief。〃

〃And　what　shall　we　do？〃

〃You　must　stay　with　her　till　Flora　comes。　　I　will　be　here　as　much　as
I　can。　　She　is　our　charge；　till　they　come　home。　　I　told　him；　between
the　spasms；　that　I　had　sent　for　you；　and　he　seemed　pleased。〃

〃If　only　I　were　anybody　else！〃

Dr。　May　again　threw　his　arm　round　her；　and　looked　into　her　face。　　He
felt　that　he　had　rather　have　her；　such　as　she　was；　than　anybody　else；
and；　together；　they　sat　down；　and　talked　of　what　wa