the lazy tour of two idle apprentices(两个闲荡徒弟的旅行)-第30节
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jockeys； starters； judges； and grooms。 He does not look on at the races；
like Mr。 Goodchild and his fellow…spectators。 He does not profit by the
races； like the hotel…keepers and the tradespeople。 He does not minister
to the necessities of the races； like the booth…keepers； the postilions； the
waiters； and the hawkers of Lists。 He does not assist the attractions of
the races； like the actors at the theatre； the riders at the circus； or the
posturers at the Poses Plastiques。 Absolutely and literally； he is the only
individual in Doncaster who stands by the brink of the full…flowing race…
stream； and is not swept away by it in common with all the rest of his
species。 Who is this modern hermit； this recluse of the St。 Leger…week；
this inscrutably ungregarious being； who lives apart from the amusements
and activities of his fellow…creatures？ Surely； there is little difficulty in
guessing that clearest and easiest of all riddles。 Who could he be； but Mr。
Thomas Idle？
Thomas had suffered himself to be taken to Doncaster； just as he
would have suffered himself to be taken to any other place in the habitable
globe which would guarantee him the temporary possession of a
comfortable sofa to rest his ankle on。 Once established at the hotel； with
his leg on one cushion and his back against another； he formally declined
taking the slightest interest in any circumstance whatever connected with
the races； or with the people who were assembled to see them。 Francis
Goodchild； anxious that the hours should pass by his crippled travelling…
companion as lightly as possible； suggested that his sofa should be moved
to the window； and that he should amuse himself by looking out at the
moving panorama of humanity； which the view from it of the principal
street presented。 Thomas； however； steadily declined profiting by the
suggestion。
'The farther I am from the window；' he said； 'the better； Brother Francis；
I shall be pleased。 I have nothing in common with the one prevalent idea
of all those people who are passing in the street。 Why should I care to look
at them？'
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'I hope I have nothing in common with the prevalent idea of a great
many of them； either；' answered Goodchild； thinking of the sporting
gentlemen whom he had met in the course of his wanderings about
Doncaster。 'But； surely； among all the people who are walking by the
house； at this very moment； you may find … '
'Not one living creature；' interposed Thomas； 'who is not； in one way
or another； interested in horses； and who is not； in a greater or less degree；
an admirer of them。 Now； I hold opinions in reference to these particular
members of the quadruped creation； which may lay claim （as I believe） to
the disastrous distinction of being unpartaken by any other human being；
civilised or savage； over the whole surface of the earth。 Taking the horse
as an animal in the abstract； Francis； I cordially despise him from every
point of view。'
'Thomas；' said Goodchild； 'confinement to the house has begun to
affect your biliary secretions。 I shall go to the chemist's and get you
some physic。'
'I object；' continued Thomas； quietly possessing himself of his friend's
hat； which stood on a table near him； … 'I object； first； to the personal
appearance of the horse。 I protest against the conventional idea of beauty；
as attached to that animal。 I think his nose too long； his forehead too low；
and his legs （except in the case of the cart…horse） ridiculously thin by
comparison with the size of his body。 Again； considering how big an
animal he is； I object to the contemptible delicacy of his constitution。 Is
he not the sickliest creature in creation？ Does any child catch cold as
easily as a horse？ Does he not sprain his fetlock； for all his appearance
of superior strength； as easily as I sprained my ankle！ Furthermore； to take
him from another point of view； what a helpless wretch he is！ No fine
lady requires more constant waiting…on than a horse。 Other animals can
make their own toilette： he must have a groom。 You will tell me that
this is because we want to make his coat artificially glossy。 Glossy！
Come home with me； and see my cat； … my clever cat； who can groom
herself！ Look at your own dog！ see how the intelligent creature curry…
combs himself with his own honest teeth！ Then； again； what a fool the
horse is； what a poor； nervous fool！ He will start at a piece of white
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paper in the road as if it was a lion。 His one idea； when he hears a noise
that he is not accustomed to； is to run away from it。 What do you say to
those two common instances of the sense and courage of this absurdly
overpraised animal？ I might multiply them to two hundred； if I chose to
exert my mind and waste my breath； which I never do。 I prefer coming
at once to my last charge against the horse； which is the most serious of all；
because it affects his moral character。 I accuse him boldly； in his
capacity of servant to man； of slyness and treachery。 I brand him
publicly； no matter how mild he may look about the eyes； or how sleek he
may be about the coat； as a systematic betrayer； whenever he can get the
chance； of the confidence reposed in him。 What do you mean by
laughing and shaking your head at me？'
'Oh； Thomas； Thomas！' said Goodchild。 'You had better give me my
hat； you had better let me get you that physic。'
'I will let you get anything you like； including a composing draught for
yourself；' said Thomas； irritably alluding to his fellow…apprentice's
inexhaustible activity； 'if you will only sit quiet for five minutes longer；
and hear me out。 I say again the horse is a betrayer of the confidence
reposed in him； and that opinion； let me add； is drawn from my own
personal experience； and is not based on any fanciful theory whatever。
You shall have two instances； two overwhelming instances。 Let me start
the first of these by asking； what is the distinguishing quality which the
Shetland Pony has arrogated to himself； and is still perpetually trumpeting
through the world by means of popular report and books on Natural
History？ I see the answer in your face： it is the quality of being Sure…
Footed。 He professes to have other virtues； such as hardiness and
strength； which you may discover on trial； but the one thing which he
insists on your believing； when you get on his back； is that he may be
safely depended on not to tumble down with you。 Very good。 Some
years ago； I was in Shetland with a party of friends。 They insisted on
taking me with them to the top of a precipice that overhung the sea。 It
was a great distance off； but they all determined to walk to it except me。
I was wiser then than I was with you at Carrock； and I determined to be
carried to the precipice。 There was no carriage…road in the island； and
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nobody offered （in consequence； as I suppose； of the imperfectly… civilised
state of the country） to bring me a sedan…chair； which is naturally what I
should have liked best。 A Shetland pony was produced instead。 I
remembered my Natural History； I recalled popular report； and I go
