confidence-第21节

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！



Bernard　remarked　that　it　was　possible　Lovelock　would　still　have　news　of　Miss　Blanche；　and　before　he　left　Baden　he　learned　that　she　had　addressed　her　forsaken　swain　a　charming　little　note　from　Lausanne；　where　the　three　ladies　had　paused　in　their　flight　from　Baden；　and　where　Mrs。　Vivian　had　decreed　that　for　the　present　they　should　remain。

〃I　'm　devilish　glad　she　writes；〃　said　Captain　Lovelock；　〃some　girls　do　write；　you　know。〃

Blanche　found　Lausanne　most　horrid　after　Baden；　for　whose　delights　she　languished。　　The　delights　of　Baden；　however；　were　not　obvious　just　now　to　her　correspondent；　who　had　taken　Bernard's　fifty　pounds　into　the　Kursaal　and　left　them　there。　Bernard；　on　learning　his　misfortune；　lent　him　another　fifty；　with　which　he　performed　a　second　series　of　unsuccessful　experiments；　and　our　hero　was　not　at　his　ease　until　he　had　passed　over　to　his　luckless　friend　the　whole　amount　of　his　own　winnings；　every　penny　of　which　found　its　way　through　Captain　Lovelock's　fingers　back　into　the　bank。　　When　this　operation　was　completed；　Bernard　left　Baden；　the　Captain　gloomily　accompanying　him　to　the　station。

I　have　said　that　there　had　come　over　Bernard　a　singular　sense　of　freedom。　One　of　the　uses　he　made　of　his　freedom　was　to　undertake　a　long　journey。　He　went　to　the　East　and　remained　absent　from　Europe　for　upward　of　two　years　a　period　of　his　life　of　which　it　is　not　proposed　to　offer　a　complete　history。　The　East　is　a　wonderful　region；　and　Bernard；　investigating　the　mysteries　of　Asia；　saw　a　great　many　curious　and　beautiful　things。　　He　had　moments　of　keen　enjoyment；　he　laid　up　a　great　store　of　impressions　and　even　a　considerable　sum　of　knowledge。　　But；　nevertheless；　he　was　not　destined　to　look　back　upon　this　episode　with　any　particular　complacency。　It　was　less　delightful　than　it　was　supposed　to　be；　it　was　less　successful　than　it　might　have　been。　　By　what　unnatural　element　the　cup　of　pleasure　was　adulterated；　he　would　have　been　very　much　at　a　loss　to　say；　but　it　was　an　incontestable　fact　that　at　times　he　sipped　it　as　a　medicine；　rather　than　quaffed　it　as　a　nectar。　　When　people　congratulated　him　on　his　opportunity　of　seeing　the　world；　and　said　they　envied　him　the　privilege　of　seeing　it　so　well；　he　felt　even　more　than　the　usual　degree　of　irritation　produced　by　an　insinuation　that　fortune　thinks　so　poorly　of　us　as　to　give　us　easy　terms。　　Misplaced　sympathy　is　the　least　available　of　superfluities；　and　Bernard　at　this　time　found　himself　thinking　that　there　was　a　good　deal　of　impertinence　in　the　world。　He　would；　however；　readily　have　confessed　that；　in　so　far　as　he　failed　to　enjoy　his　Oriental　wanderings；　the　fault　was　his　own；　though　he　would　have　made　mentally　the　gratifying　reflection　that　never　was　a　fault　less　deliberate。　　If；　during　the　period　of　which　I　speak；　his　natural　gayety　had　sunk　to　a　minor　key；　a　partial　explanation　may　be　found　in　the　fact　that　he　was　deprived　of　the　society　of　his　late　companion。　It　was　an　odd　circumstance　that　the　two　young　men　had　not　met　since　Gordon's　abrupt　departure　from　Baden。　　Gordon　went　to　Berlin；　and　shortly　afterward　to　America；　so　that　they　were　on　opposite　sides　of　the　globe。　Before　he　returned　to　his　own　country；　Bernard　made　by　letter　two　or　three　offers　to　join　him　in　Europe；　anywhere　that　was　agreeable　to　him。　Gordon　answered　that　his　movements　were　very　uncertain；　and　that　he　should　be　sorry　to　trouble　Bernard　to　follow　him　about。　　He　had　put　him　to　this　inconvenience　in　making　him　travel　from　Venice　to　Baden；　and　one　such　favor　at　a　time　was　enough　to　ask；　even　of　the　most　obliging　of　men。　Bernard　was；　of　course；　afraid　that　what　he　had　told　Gordon　about　Angela　Vivian　was　really　the　cause　of　a　state　of　things　which；　as　between　two　such　good　friends；　wore　a　perceptible　resemblance　to　alienation。　Gordon　had　given　her　up；　but　he　bore　Bernard　a　grudge　for　speaking　ill　of　her；　and　so　long　as　this　disagreeable　impression　should　last；　he　preferred　not　to　see　him。　　Bernard　was　frank　enough　to　charge　the　poor　fellow　with　a　lingering　rancor；　of　which　he　made；　indeed；　no　great　crime。　　But　Gordon　denied　the　allegation；　and　assured　him　that；　to　his　own　perception；　there　was　no　decline　in　their　intimacy。　He　only　requested；　as　a　favor　and　as　a　tribute　to　〃just　susceptibilities；〃　that　Bernard　would　allude　no　more　either　to　Miss　Vivian　or　to　what　had　happened　at　Baden。　　This　request　was　easy　to　comply　with；　and　Bernard；　in　writing；　strictly　conformed　to　it；　but　it　seemed　to　him　that　the　act　of　doing　so　was　in　itself　a　cooling…off。　What　would　be　a　better　proof　of　what　is　called　a　〃tension〃　than　an　agreement　to　avoid　a　natural　topic？　Bernard　moralized　a　little　over　Gordon's　〃just　susceptibilities；〃　and　felt　that　the　existence　of　a　perverse　resentment　in　so　honest　a　nature　was　a　fact　gained　to　his　acquaintance　with　psychological　science。　It　cannot　be　said；　however；　that　he　suffered　this　fact　to　occupy　at　all　times　the　foreground　of　his　consciousness。　　Bernard　was　like　some　great　painters；　his　foregrounds　were　very　happily　arranged。　He　heard　nothing　of　Mrs。　Vivian　and　her　daughter；　beyond　a　rumor　that　they　had　gone　to　Italy；　and　he　learned；　on　apparently　good　authority；　that　Blanche　Evers　had　returned　to　New　York　with　her　mother。　　He　wondered　whether　Captain　Lovelock　was　still　in　pawn　at　the　Hotel　de　Hollande。　If　he　did　not　allow　himself　to　wonder　too　curiously　whether　he　had　done　a　harm　to　Gordon；　it　may　be　affirmed　that　he　was　haunted　by　the　recurrence　of　that　other　question；　of　which　mention　has　already　been　made。　Had　he　done　a　harm　to　Angela　Vivian；　and　did　she　know　that　he　had　done　it？　This　inquiry　by　no　means　made　him　miserable；　and　it　was　far　from　awaiting　him　regularly　on　his　pillow。　　But　it　visited　him　at　intervals；　and　sometimes　in　the　strangest　placessuddenly；　abruptly；　in　the　stillness　of　an　Indian　temple；　or　amid　the　shrillness　of　an　Oriental　crowd。　He　became　familiar　with　it　at　last；　he　called　it　his　Jack…in…the…box。　Some　invisible　touch　of　circumstance　would　press　the　spring；　and　the　little　image　would　pop　up；　staring　him　in　the　face　and　grinning　an　interrogation。　Bernard　always　clapped　down　the　lid；　for　he　regarded　this　phenomenon　as　strikingly　inane。　　But　if　it　was　more　frequent　than　any　pang　of　conscience　connected　with　the　remembrance　of　Gordon　himself；　this　last　sentiment　was　certainly　lively　enough　to　make　it　a　great　relief　to　hear　at　last　a　rumor　that　the　excellent　fellow　was　about　to　be　married。　The　rumor　reached　him　at　Athens；　it　was　vague　and　indirect；　and　it　omitted　the　name　of　his　betrothed。　　But　Bernard　made　the　most　of　it；　and　took　comfort　in　the　thought　that　his　friend　had　recovered　his　spirits　and　his　appetite　for　matrimony。






CHAPTER　XVI

It　was　not　till　our　hero　reached　Paris；　on　his　return　from　the　distant　East；　that　the　rumor　I　have　just　mentioned　acquired　an　appreciable　consistency。　　Here；　indeed；　it　took　the　shape　of　authentic　information。　　Among　a　number　of　delayed　letters　which　had　been　awaiting　him　at　his　banker's　he　found　a　communication　from　Gordon　Wright。　　During　the　previous　year　or　two　his　correspondence　with　this　trustedand　trusting　friend　had　not　been　frequent；　and　Bernard　had　received　little　direct　news　of　him。　　Three　or　four　short　letters　had　overtaken　him　in　his　wanderingsletters　as　cordial；　to　all　appearance；　if　not　as　voluminous；　as　the　punctual　missives　of　an　earlier　time。　Bernard　made　a　point　of　satisfying　himself　that　they　were　as　cordial；　he　weighed　them　in　the　scales　of　impartial　suspicion。　　It　seemed　to　him　on　the　whole　that　there　was　no　relaxation　of　Gordon's　epistolary　tone。　　If　he　wrote　less　often　than　he　used　to　do；　that　was　a　thing　that　very　commonly　happened　as　men　grew　older。　The　closest　intimacies；　moreover；　had　phases　and　seasons；　intermissions　and　revivals；　and　even　if　his　friend　had；　in　fact；　averted　his　countenance　from　him；　this　was　simply　the　accomplishment　of　a　periodical　revolution　which　would　bring　them　in　due　order　face　to　face　again。　　Bernard　made　a　point；　himself；　of　writing　tolerably　often　and　writing　always　in　the　friendliest　tone。　He　made　it　a　matter　of　consciencehe　liked　to　feel　that　he　was　treating　Gordon　generously；　and　not　demanding　an　eye　for　an　eye。　The　letter　he　found　in　Paris　was　so　short　that　I　may　give　it　entire。

〃My　dear　Bernard　（it　ran）；　I　must　write　to　you　before　I　write　to　any　one　else；　though　unfortunately　you　are　so　far　away　that　you　can't　be　the　first　to　congratulate　me。　Try　and　not　be　the　last；　however。　　I　am　going　to　be　married　as　soon　as　possible。　　You　know　the　young　lady；　so　you　can　appreciate　the　situation。　　Do　you　remember　little　Blanche　Evers；　whom　we　used　to　see　three　years　ago　at　Baden…Baden？　Of　course　you　remember　her；　for　I　know　you　used　often　to　talk　with　her。　You　will　be　rather　surprised；　perhaps；　at　my　having　selected　her　as　the　partner　of　a　life…time；　but　we　manage　these　matters　according　to　our　lights。　　I　am　very　much　in　love　with　her；　and　I　hold　that　an　excellent　reason。　　I　have　been　ready　any　time　this　year　or　two　to　fall　in　love　with　some　simple；　trusting；　child…like　nature。　　I　find　this　in　perfection　in　this　charming　young　girl。　　I　find　her　so　natural　and　fresh。　I　remember　telling　you　once　that　I　did　n't　wish　to　be　fascinated　that　I　wanted　to　estimate　scientifically　the　woman　I　shou