northanger abbey(诺桑觉奇)-第61节
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consideration of their daughter’s long and lonely journey； Mr。 and
Mrs。 Morland could not but feel that it might have been productive
of much unpleasantness to her； that it was what they could never
have voluntarily suffered； and that； in forcing her on such a
measure； General Tilney had acted neither honourably nor
feelingly—neither as a gentleman nor as a parent。 Why he had
done it； what could have provoked him to such a breach of
hospitality； and so suddenly turned all his partial regard for their
daughter into actual ill…will； was a matter which they were at least
as far from divining as Catherine herself； but it did not oppress
them by any means so long； and； after a due course of useless
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conjecture； that “it was a strange business； and that he must be a
very strange man；” grew enough for all their indignation and
wonder； though Sarah indeed still indulged in the sweets of
incomprehensibility； exclaiming and conjecturing with youthful
ardour。—“My dear； you give yourself a great deal of needless
trouble；” said her mother at last； “depend upon it； it is something
not at all worth understanding。”
“I can allow for his wishing Catherine away； when he
recollected this engagement；” said Sarah； “but why not do it
civilly？”
“I am sorry for the young people；” returned Mrs。 Morland；
“they must have a sad time of it； but as for anything else； it is no
matter now； Catherine is safe at home； and our comfort does not
depend upon General Tilney。” Catherine sighed。 “Well；”
continued her philosophic mother； “I am glad I did not know of
your journey at the time； but now it is an over； perhaps there is no
great harm done。 It is always good for young people to be put upon
exerting themselves； and you know； my dear Catherine； you
always were a sad little shatter…brained creature； but now you
must have been forced to have your wits about you； with so much
changing of chaises and so forth； and I hope it will appear that you
have not left anything behind you in any of the pockets。”
Catherine hoped so too； and tried to feel an interest in her own
amendment； but her spirits were quite worn down； and； to be
silent and alone becoming soon her only wish； she readily agreed
to her mother’s next counsel of going early to bed。 Her parents；
seeing nothing in her ill…looks and agitation but the natural
consequence of mortified feelings； and of the unusual exertion and
fatigue of such a journey； parted from her without any doubt of
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their being soon slept away； and though； when they all met the
next morning； her recovery was not equal to their hopes； they
were still perfectly unsuspicious of there being any deeper evil。
They never once thought of her heart； which； for the parents of a
young lady of seventeen； just returned from her first excursion
from home； was odd enough！
As soon as breakfast was over； she sat down to fulfil her
promise to Miss Tilney； whose trust in the effect of time and
distance on her friend’s disposition was already justified； for
already did Catherine reproach herself with having parted from
Eleanor coldly； with having never enough valued her merits or
kindness； and never enough commiserated her for what she had
been yesterday left to endure。 The strength of these feelings；
however； was far from assisting her pen； and never had it been
harder for her to write than in addressing Eleanor Tilney。 To
compose a letter which might at once do justice to her sentiments
and her situation； convey gratitude without servile regret； be
guarded without coldness； and honest without resentment—a
letter which Eleanor might not be pained by the perusal of—and；
above all； which she might not blush herself； if Henry should
chance to see； was an undertaking to frighten away all her powers
of performance； and； after long thought and much perplexity； to be
very brief was all that she could determine on with any confidence
of safety。 The money therefore which Eleanor had advanced was
enclosed with little more than grateful thanks； and the thousand
good wishes of a most affectionate heart。
“This has been a strange acquaintance；” observed Mrs。
Morland； as the letter was finished； “soon made and soon ended。—
I am sorry it happens so； for Mrs。 Allen thought them very pretty
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kind of young people； and you were sadly out of luck too in your
Isabella。 Ah！ Poor James！ Well； we must live and learn； and the
next new friends you make I hope will be better worth keeping。”
Catherine coloured as she warmly answered； “No friend can be
better worth keeping than Eleanor。”
“If so； my dear； I dare say you will meet again some time or
other； do not be uneasy。 It is ten to one but you are thrown
together again in the course of a few years； and then what a
pleasure it will be！”
Mrs。 Morland was not happy in her attempt at consolation。 The
hope of meeting again in the course of a few years could only put
into Catherine’s head what might happen within that time to make
a meeting dreadful to her。 She could never forget Henry Tilney； or
think of him with less tenderness than she did at that moment； but
he might forget her； and in that case； to meet！—Her eyes filled
with tears as she pictured her acquaintance so renewed； and her
mother； perceiving her comfortable suggestions to have had no
good effect； proposed； as another expedient for restoring her
spirits； that they should call on Mrs。 Allen。
The two houses were only a quarter of a mile apart； and； as they
walked； Mrs。 Morland quickly dispatched all that she felt on the
score of James’s disappointment。 “We are sorry for him；” said she；
“but otherwise there is no harm done in the match going off； for it
could not be a desirable thing to have him engaged to a girl whom
we had not the smallest acquaintance with； and who was so
entirely without fortune； and now； after such behaviour； we
cannot think at all well of her。 Just at present it comes hard to
poor James； but that will not last for ever； and I dare say he will be
a discreeter man all his life； for the foolishness of his first choice。”
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This was just such a summary view of the affair as Catherine
could listen to； another sentence might have endangered her
complaisance； and made her reply less rational； for soon were all
her thinking powers swallowed up in the reflection of her own
change of feelings and spirits since last she had trodden that well…
known road。 It was not three months ago since； wild with joyful
expectation； she had there run backwards and forwards some ten
times a day； with an heart light； gay； and independent； looking
forward to pleasures untasted and unalloyed； and free from the
apprehension of evil as from the knowledge of it。 Three months
ago had seen
