manalive-第30节

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when　their　real　front　doors　open　inwards。'

〃Something　from　the　folk…lore　of　my　infancy　still　kept　me　foolishly　silent；
and　before　I　could　speak；　the　Englishman　had　leaned　over　and　was　saying
in　a　sort　of　loud　whisper；　‘I　have　found　out　how　to　make　a　big　thing　small。
I　have　found　out　how　to　turn　a　house　into　a　doll's　house。　　Get　a　long
way　off　it：　　God　lets　us　turn　all　things　into　toys　by　his　great　gift
of　distance。　　Once　let　me　see　my　old　brick　house　standing　up　quite
little　against　the　horizon；　and　I　shall　want　to　go　back　to　it　again。
I　shall　see　the　funny　little　toy　lamp…post　painted　green　against　the　gate；
and　all　the　dear　little　people　like　dolls　looking　out　of　the　window。
For　the　windows　really　open　in　my　doll's　house。'

〃‘But　why？'　　I　asked；　‘should　you　wish　to　return　to　that　particular
doll's　house？　　Having　taken；　like　Nora；　the　bold　step　against　convention；
having　made　yourself　in　the　conventional　sense　disreputable；　having　dared
to　be　free；　why　should　you　not　take　advantage　of　your　freedom？
As　the　greatest　modern　writers　have　pointed　out；　what　you　called　your
marriage　was　only　your　mood。　　You　have　a　right　to　leave　it　all　behind；
like　the　clippings　of　your　hair　or　the　parings　of　your　nails。
Having　once　escaped；　you　have　the　world　before　you。　　Though　the　words
may　seem　strange　to　you；　you　are　free　in　Russia。'

〃He　sat　with　his　dreamy　eyes　on　the　dark　circles　of　the　plains；
where　the　only　moving　thing　was　the　long　and　labouring　trail　of　smoke
out　of　the　railway　engine；　violet　in　tint；　volcanic　in　outline；
the　one　hot　and　heavy　cloud　of　that　cold　clear　evening　of　pale　green。

〃‘Yes；'　he　said　with　a　huge　sigh；　‘I　am　free　in　Russia。　　You　are　right。
I　could　really　walk　into　that　town　over　there　and　have　love　all　over　again；
and　perhaps　marry　some　beautiful　woman　and　begin　again；　and　nobody　could
ever　find　me。　　Yes；　you　have　certainly　convinced　me　of　something。'

〃His　tone　was　so　queer　and　mystical　that　I　felt　impelled　to　ask
him　what　he　meant；　and　of　what　exactly　I　had　convinced　him。

〃‘You　have　convinced　me；'　he　said　with　the　same　dreamy　eye；
‘why　it　is　really　wicked　and　dangerous　for　a　man　to　run　away
from　his　wife。'

〃‘And　why　is　it　dangerous？'　　I　inquired。

〃‘Why；　because　nobody　can　find　him；'　answered　this　odd　person；
‘and　we　all　want　to　be　found。'

〃‘The　most　original　modern　thinkers；'　I　remarked；
‘Ibsen；　Gorki；　Nietzsche；　Shaw；　would　all　rather　say　that　what　we
want　most　is　to　be　lost：　　to　find　ourselves　in　untrodden　paths；
and　to　do　unprecedented　things：　　to　break　with　the　past　and　belong
to　the　future。'

〃He　rose　to　his　whole　height　somewhat　sleepily；　and　looked　round　on
what　was；　I　confess；　a　somewhat　desolate　scenethe　dark　purple　plains；
the　neglected　railroad；　the　few　ragged　knots　of　malcontents。
‘I　shall　not　find　the　house　here；'　he　said。　　‘It　is　still　eastward
further　and　further　eastward。'

〃Then　he　turned　upon　me　with　something　like　fury；　and　struck　the　foot
of　his　pole　upon　the　frozen　earth。

〃‘And　if　I　do　go　back　to　my　country；'　he　cried；　‘I　may　be　locked　up　in　a
madhouse　before　I　reach　my　own　house。　　I　have　been　a　bit　unconventional
in　my　time！　　Why；　Nietzsche　stood　in　a　row　of　ramrods　in　the　silly　old
Prussian　army；　and　Shaw　takes　temperance　beverages　in　the　suburbs；
but　the　things　I　do　are　unprecedented　things。　　This　round　road　I
am　treading　is　an　untrodden　path。　　I　do　believe　in　breaking　out；
I　am　a　revolutionist。　　But　don't　you　see　that　all　these　real　leaps
and　destructions　and　escapes　are　only　attempts　to　get　back　to　Eden
to　something　we　have　had；　to　something　we　at　least　have　heard　of？
Don't　you　see　one　only　breaks　the　fence　or　shoots　the　moon　in　order
to　get　HOME？'

〃‘No；'　I　answered　after　due　reflection；　‘I　don't　think　I　should　accept　that。'

〃‘Ah；'　he　said　with　a　sort　of　a　sigh；　‘then　you　have　explained　a　second
thing　to　me。'

〃‘What　do　you　mean？'　　I　asked；　‘what　thing？'

〃‘Why　your　revolution　has　failed；'　he　said；　and　walking　across　quite
suddenly　to　the　train　he　got　into　it　just　as　it　was　steaming　away　at　last。
And　as　I　saw　the　long　snaky　tail　of　it　disappear　along　the　darkening　flats。

〃I　saw　no　more　of　him。　　But　though　his　views　were　adverse　to　the　best
advanced　thought；　he　struck　me　as　an　interesting　person：　　I　should
like　to　find　out　if　he　has　produced　any　literary　works。Yours；　etc。；
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　〃Paul　Nickolaiovitch。〃


There　was　something　in　this　odd　set　of　glimpses　into　foreign　lives　which　kept
the　absurd　tribunal　quieter　than　it　had　hitherto　been；　and　it　was　again
without　interruption　that　Inglewood　opened　another　paper　upon　his　pile。
〃The　Court　will　be　indulgent；〃　he　said；　〃if　the　next　note　lacks　the　special
ceremonies　of　our　letter…writing。　It　is　ceremonious　enough　in　its　own　way：


〃The　Celestial　Principles　are　permanent：　　Greeting。I　am　Wong…Hi；
and　I　tend　the　temple　of　all　the　ancestors　of　my　family　in　the　forest
of　Fu。　　The　man　that　broke　through　the　sky　and　came　to　me　said　that　it
must　be　very　dull；　but　I　showed　him　the　wrongness　of　his　thought。
I　am　indeed　in　one　place；　for　my　uncle　took　me　to　this
temple　when　I　was　a　boy；　and　in　this　I　shall　doubtless　die。
But　if　a　man　remain　in　one　place　he　shall　see　that　the　place　changes。
The　pagoda　of　my　temple　stands　up　silently　out　of　all　the　trees；
like　a　yellow　pagoda　above　many　green　pagodas。　　But　the　skies
are　sometimes　blue　like　porcelain；　and　sometimes　green　like　jade；
and　sometimes　red　like　garnet。　　But　the　night　is　always　ebony
and　always　returns；　said　the　Emperor　Ho。

〃The　sky…breaker　came　at　evening　very　suddenly；　for　I　had　hardly
seen　any　stirring　in　the　tops　of　the　green　trees　over　which　I　look
as　over　a　sea；　when　I　go　to　the　top　of　the　temple　at　morning。
And　yet　when　he　came；　it　was　as　if　an　elephant　had　strayed
from　the　armies　of　the　great　kings　of　India。　　For　palms　snapped；
and　bamboos　broke；　and　there　came　forth　in　the　sunshine　before
the　temple　one　taller　than　the　sons　of　men。

〃Strips　of　red　and　white　hung　about　him　like　ribbons　of　a　carnival；
and　he　carried　a　pole　with　a　row　of　teeth　on　it　like　the　teeth　of　a　dragon。
His　face　was　white　and　discomposed；　after　the　fashion　of　the　foreigners；
so　that　they　look　like　dead　men　filled　with　devils；　and　he　spoke
our　speech　brokenly。

〃He　said　to　me；　‘This　is　only　a　temple；　I　am　trying　to　find　a　house。'
And　then　he　told　me　with　indelicate　haste　that　the　lamp　outside　his　house
was　green；　and　that　there　was　a　red　post　at　the　corner　of　it。

〃‘I　have　not　seen　your　house　nor　any　houses；'　I　answered。
‘I　dwell　in　this　temple　and　serve　the　gods。'

〃‘Do　you　believe　in　the　gods？'　he　asked　with　hunger　in　his　eyes；
like　the　hunger　of　dogs。　　And　this　seemed　to　me　a　strange　question
to　ask；　for　what　should　a　man　do　except　what　men　have　done？

〃‘My　Lord；'　I　said；　‘it　must　be　good　for　men　to　hold　up　their　hands　even
if　the　skies　are　empty。　　For　if　there　are　gods；　they　will　be　pleased；
and　if　there　are　none；　then　there　are　none　to　be　displeased。
Sometimes　the　skies　are　gold　and　sometimes　porphyry　and　sometimes
ebony；　but　the　trees　and　the　temple　stand　still　under　it　all。
So　the　great　Confucius　taught　us　that　if　we　do　always　the　same　things
with　our　hands　and　our　feet　as　do　the　wise　beasts　and　birds；　with　our
heads　we　may　think　many　things：　　yes；　my　Lord；　and　doubt　many　things。
So　long　as　men　offer　rice　at　the　right　season；　and　kindle　lanterns
at　the　right　hour；　it　matters　little　whether　there　be　gods　or　no。
For　these　things　are　not　to　appease　gods；　but　to　appease　men。'

〃He　came　yet　closer　to　me；　so　that　he　seemed　enormous；
yet　his　look　was　very　gentle。

〃‘Break　your　temple；'　he　said；　‘and　your　gods　will　be　freed。'

〃And　I；　smiling　at　his　simplicity；　answered：　　‘And　so；　if　there　be　no　gods；
I　shall　have　nothing　but　a　broken　temple。'

〃And　at　this；　that　giant　from　whom　the　light　of　reason　was
withheld　threw　out　his　mighty　arms　and　asked　me　to　forgive　him。
And　when　I　asked　him　for　what　he　should　be　forgiven　he　answered：
‘For　being　right。'

〃‘Your　idols　and　emperors　are　so　old　and　wise　and　satisfying；'
he　cried；　‘it　is　a　shame　that　they　should　be　wrong。
We　are　so　vulgar　and　violent；　we　have　done　you　so　many　iniquities
it　is　a　shame　we　should　be　right　after　all。'

〃And　I；　still　enduring　his　harmlessness；　asked　him　why　he　thought
that　he　and　his　people　were　right。

〃And　he　answered：　　‘We　are　right　because　we　are　bound　where
men　should　be　bound；　and　free　where　men　should　be　free。
We　are　right　because　we　doubt　and　destroy　laws　and　customs
but　we　do　not　doubt　our　own　right　to　destroy　them。　　For　you　live
by　customs；　but　we　live　by　creeds。　　Behold　me！　　In　my　country　I
am　called　Smip。　　My　country　is　abandoned；　my　name　is　defiled；
because　I　pursue　around　the　world　what　really　belongs　to　me。
You　are　steadfast　as　the　trees　because　you　do　not　believe。
I　am　as　fickle　as　the　tempest　because　I　do　believe。
I　do　believe　in　my　own　house；　which　I　shall　find　again。
And　at　the　last　remaineth　the　green　lantern　and　the　red　post。'

〃I　said　to　him：　　‘At　the　last　remaineth　only　wisdom。'

〃But　even　as　I　said　the　word　he　uttered　a　horrible　shout；
and　rushing　forward　disappeared　among　the　trees。
I　have　not　seen　this　man　again　nor　any　oth