the gathering of brother hilarius-第2节

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〃Light　of　love；　it　has　a　wondrous　fair　sound；〃　said　Hilarius　with　a　smile。

The　maid　looked　at　him　speechless。

〃Go　home；　Boy；〃　she　said　at　last　emphatically。

Just　then　a　lad；　a　tumbler　by　his　dress；　pushed　a　way　through　the　undergrowth；　and　stood　grinning　at　the　pair。

〃So；　Gia！〃　he　said。　　〃We　must　make　haste；　the　others　wait。〃

〃''Tis　my　brother；〃　said　the　dancer；　〃and〃　…　pointing　to　the　bag　slung　across　the　youth's　shoulder　…　〃I　trust　he　hath　a　fine　fat　hen　from　thy　Monastery　for　our　meal。〃

Hilarius　broke　into　a　cold　sweat。

The　Convent's　hens！　　The　Saints　preserve　us！　　Was　nothing　sacred；　and　were　the　Ten　Commandments　written　solely　for　use　in　the　Monasteries？

〃'Tis　stealing；〃　he　said　feebly。

〃'Tis　stealing；〃　the　dancer　mocked。　　〃Hast　thou　another　sermon　ready；　Sir　Preacher？〃

〃Empty　bellies　make　light　fingers；〃　quoth　the　youth。　　〃Did'st　thou　ever　hunger；　master？〃

〃There　is　the　fast　of　Lent　which　presses　somewhat；〃　said　Hilarius。

〃But　ever　a　meal　certain　once　in　the　day？〃　queried　the　girl。

〃Ay；　surely；　and　collation　also；　and　Sunday　is　no　fast。〃

The　mischievous　apes　laughed　…　how　they　laughed！

〃So；　good　Preacher；〃　said　the　dancer　at　last；　rising　to　her　feet；　〃thou　dost　know　it　is　wrong　to　steal；　but　hast　never　felt　hunger。　Thou　dost　know　it　is　wrong　to　love　any　but　God；　the　Saints；　and　thy　mother；　but　thou　hast　never　known　a　mother；　nor　felt　what　it　was　to　love。　　Blind　eyes！　　Blind　eyes！　the　very　forest　could　teach　thee　these　things　an　thou　would'st　learn。　　Farewell；　good　novice；　back　to　thy　Saints　and　thy　nursery；　for　me　the　wide　wide　world；　hunger　and　love　…　love　…　love！〃

She　seized　her　brother's　hand　and　together　they　danced　away　like　two　bright　butterflies　among　the　trees。

Hilarius　stared　after　them　until　they　disappeared；　and　then　with　dazed　eyes　and　drooping　head　took　his　way　back　to　the　Monastery。　The　train　of　mules　had　just　arrived；　all　was　stir；　bustle；　and　explanation；　and　in　the　thick　of　it　he　slipped　in　unseen；　unquestioned；　but　he　was　hardly　conscious　of　this　mercy　vouchsafed　him；　for　in　his　heart　reigned　desolation　and　doubt；　and　in　his　ears　rang　the　dancer's　parting　cry；　〃Hunger　and　love　…　love　…　love！〃



CHAPTER　II　…　THE　LOVE　OF　PRIOR　STEPHEN



BROTHER　BERNARD；　the　Precentor；　dealt　out　gold；　paint　and　vellum　with　generous　hand　to　his　favourite　pupil；　and　wondered　at　his　downcast　look。

〃Methinks　this　gold　is　dull；　Brother；〃　said　Hilarius　one　day；　fretfully；　to　his　old　master。

And　again　…

〃'Tis　very　poor　vermilion。〃

The　Brother　looked　at　him　enquiry。

〃Nay；　nay；　boy；　'tis　thine　eyes　at　fault；　naught　ails　the　colours。〃

Later；　the　Precentor　came　to　look　at　the　delicate　border　Hilarius　was　setting　to　the　page　of　the　Nativity　of　Our　Lady。

〃Now　may　God　be　good　to　us！〃　he　cried　with　uplifted　hands。　　〃Since　when　did　man　paint　the　Blessed　Mother　with　grey　eyes　and　black　hair　…　curly　too；　i'　faith？〃

Hilarius　crimsoned；　he　was　weary　of　limning　ever　with　blue　and　gold；　he　faltered。

It　was　the　same　in　chapel。　　The　insistent　question　pursued　him　through　chant　and　psalm。　　Did　he　really　love　the　Saints　…　St　Benedict；　St　Scholastica；　St　Bernard；　St　Hilary？　　The　names　left　him　untouched；　but　his　lips　quivered　as　he　thought　of　the　great　love　between　the　holy　brother　and　sister　of　his　Order。　　If　he　had　had　a　sister　would　they　have　loved　like　that？

The　Saints'　Days　came　and　went；　and　he　scourged　himself　with　the　repeated　question；　kneeling　with　burning　cheeks；　and　eyes　from　which　tears　were　not　absent；　in　the　Chapel　of　the　Great　Mother。　〃Light　of　Love；〃　the　girl　had　called　his　mother；　what　more　beautiful　name　could　he　find　for　the　Queen　of　Saints　herself？　　So　he　prayed　in　his　simplicity：…　〃Great　Light　of　Love；　Mother　of　my　mother；　grant　love；　love；　love；　to　thy　poor　sinful　son！〃

The　question　came　in　his　daily　life。

Did　he　love　the　Prior？　　He　feared　him；　and　his　voice　was　for　Hilarius　as　the　voice　of　God　Himself。　　Brother　John？　　He　feared　him　too；　Brother　John's　tongue　was　a　thing　to　fear。　　Brother　Richard；　old；　half…blind？　　Surely　he　loved　Brother　Richard？　…　sad；　helpless；　and　lonely；　by　reason　of　his　infirmities　…　or　was　it　only　pity　he　felt　for　him？

Nay；　let　be；　he　loved　them　all。　　The　Monastery　was　his　home；　the　Prior　his　father；　the　monks　his　brethren；　why　heed　the　wild　words　of　the　witch　in　the　forest？　　And　yet　what　was　it　she　had　said？　〃For　me　the　wide　world；　hunger；　and　love　…　love　…　love！〃

He　wandered　in　the　Monastery　garden　and　was　troubled　by　its　beauties。　　Two　sulphur　butterflies　sported　around　the　tall　white　lilies　at　the　farmery　door。　　Did　they　love？

He　watched　the　sparrows　at　their　second　nesting；　full　of　business　and　cheerful　bickerings。　　Did　they　love？

She　had　said　the　answer　was　writ　large　for　him　to　see：　　he　wandered　staring；　wide…eyed　but　sightless。

At　last　in　his　sore　distress　he　turned　to　the　Prior；　as　the　ship…　wrecked　mariner　turns　to　the　sea…girt　rock　that　towers　serene　and　unhurt　above　the　devouring　waves。

The　Prior　heard　him　patiently；　with　here　and　there　a　shrewd　question。　　When　the　halting　tale　was　told　he　mused　awhile；　his　stern　blue　eyes　grew　tender；　and　a　little　smile　troubled　the　firm　line　of　his　mouth。

〃My　son；〃　he　said　at　length；　〃thou　art　in　the　wrong　school；　nursery；　was　it　the　maid　said？　　A　shrewd　lass　and　welcome　to　the　hen。　　Thou　art　a　limner　at　heart　…　Brother　Bernard　tells　of　thy　wondrous　skill　with　the　brush　…　and　to　be　limner　thou　must　learn　to　hunger　and　to　love　as　the　maid　said。　　Ay；　boy；　and　to　be　monk　too；　though　alack；　men　gainsay　it。〃

〃Father；〃　said　Hilarius；　waxing　bold　from　excessive　need；　〃did'st　thou　ever　love　as　the　maid　meant？〃

〃Ay；　boy　…　thy　mother。〃

There　was　a　long　silence。　　Then　the　boy　said　timidly：…

〃The　maid　said　she　might　be　light　of　love；　'tis　a　beautiful　thought。〃

The　Prior　started；　and　looked　at　him　curiously：…

〃What　didst　thou　tell　the　maid？〃

〃That　I　never　knew　her；　but　that　my　father　was　a　gentle　knight　who　died　ere　I　saw　him；　and　then　the　maid　said　perchance　my　mother　was　light　of　love。〃

〃Boy；〃　said　the　Prior　gravely；　〃'tis　a　weary　tale；　and　sad　of　telling。　　Thy　mother　was　wondrous　fair　without；　but　she　reckoned　love　lightly；　nay；　knew　it　not　for　the　holy　thing　it　is；　but　thought　only　of　bodily　lusts。　　Pray　for　her　soul〃　…　his　voice　grew　stern　…　〃as　for　one　of　those　upon　whom　God；　in　His　great　pity；　may　have　mercy。　　Thus　have　I　prayed　these　many　years。〃

　Hilarius　looked　at　him　in　wide…eyed　horror：…

〃She　was　evil；　wicked；　my　mother？〃

〃Ay　…　a　light　woman；　that　was　what　the　maid　meant。〃

Then　great　darkness　fell　upon　the　soul　of　Hilarius；　and　he　clasped　the　Prior's　knees　weeping　and　praying　like　a　little　child。


〃And　so；　my　son；〃　said　the　Prior；　〃for　a　time　thou　shalt　go　out　into　the　world；　to　strive　and　fail；　hunger　and　love；　only　have　a　care　that　thou　art　chaste　in　heart　and　life；　for　it　is　the　pure　shall　see　God；　and　seeing　love　Him。　　Leave　me　now　that。　　I　may　set　in　order　thy　going；　and　send　the　Chamberlain　hither　to　me。〃

That　night　Hilarius　knelt　through　the　long　hours　at　the　great　Rood；　and　then　at　St　Mary　Maudlin's　altar　he　did　penance　for　his　dead　mother's　sin。

A　week　later　he　left　the　Monastery　as　a　bird　leaves　its　nest；　nay；　is　pushed　out　by　the　far…seeing　parent　bird；　full　of　vague　terrors　of　the　great　world　without。　　He　had　a　purse　for　his　immediate　needs；　a　letter　to　a　great　knight；　Sir　John　Maltravers；　who　would　be　his　patron；　and　another　to　the　Prior's　good　friend；　the　Abbat　of　St　Alban's。　　The　Convent　bade　him　a　sad　farewell；　for　they　loved　this　gentle　lad　who　had　been　with　them　from　a　little　child；　and　Brother　Richard　strained　his　filmy　eyes　to　look　his　last　at　the　young　face　he　would　never　see　again。

The　Prior　gave　him　the　Communion；　and　later　walked　beside　him　to　the　gates。　　Then　as　Hilarius　knelt　he　blessed　him；　and　the　boy；　overmastered　by　nameless　fear；　sprang　up　and　prayed　that　he　might　stay　and　learn　some　other　way；　however　hard。　　The　Prior　shook　his　head。

〃Nay；　my　son；　so　it　must　be；　else　how　shall　I　answer　to　the　Master　for　this　most　precious　lamb　of　my　flock？　　Come　back　to　us　…　an　thou　can'st　…　let　no　fear　deter　thee；　only　take　heed；　when　thine　eyes　are　opened　and　the　great　gifts　of　hunger　and　love　are　vouchsafed　thee；　to　keep　still　the　faithful　heart　of　a　little　child。〃

Then　he　bade　him　go；　and　Hilarius；　for　the　pull　of　his　heart…　strings；　must　needs　run　hot…foot　down　the　broad　forest　road　and　along　the　highway；　without　daring　to　look　back；　and　so　out　into　the　wide；　wide　world。



CHAPTER　III　…　THE　KING'S　SONG…BIRD



MARTIN　THE　MINSTREL　sat　under　a　wayside　oak　singing　softly　to　himself　as　he　tuned　his　vielle。　　He　was　a　long　lanky　fellow　with　straight　black　locks　flat　against　his　sallow　face；　and　dark　eyes　that　smouldered　in　hollow　cavities。　　He　wore　the　King's　colours；　and　broke　a　manchet　of　white　bread　with　his　mid…day　repast。

〃Heigh…ho！〃　sighed　Martin；　and　laid　the　vielle　lovingly　beside　him；　〃another　four　leagues　to　Westminster；　and　I　weary　enough　of　shoe…　leather　already；　and　not　another　penny　piece　in　my　pocket　'til　I　win　back　to　good　King　Ned。　　A　brave　holiday　I　have　had；　from　Candlemas　to　Midsummer；　free　to　sing　or　to　be　silent；　to　smile　or　frown；　wide　England　inste