treatises on friendship and old age-第6节

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crime。　Who　was　more　famous　and　powerful　in　Greece　than
Themistocles？　At　the　head　of　the　army　in　the　Persian　war　he　had
freed　Greece；　he　owed　his　exile　to　personal　envy：　but　he　did　not
submit　to　the　wrong　done　him　by　his　ungrateful　country　as　he
ought　to　have　done。　He　acted　as　Coriolanus　had　acted　among　us
twenty　years　before。　But　no　one　was　found　to　help　them　in　their
attacks　upon　their　fatherland。　Both　of　them　accordingly　committed
suicide。

We　conclude；　then；　not　only　that　no　such　confederation　of　evilly
disposed　men　must　be　allowed　to　shelter　itself　under　the　plea　of
friendship；　but　that；　on　the　contrary；　it　must　be　visited　with　the
severest　punishment；　lest　the　idea　should　prevail　that　fidelity　to　a
friend　justifies　even　making　war　upon　one's　country。　And　this　is　a
case　which　I　am　inclined　to　think；　considering　how　things　are
beginning　to　go；　will　sooner　or　later　arise。　And　I　care　quite　as
much　what　the　state　of　the　constitution　will　be　after　my　death　as
what　it　is　now。

13。　Let　this；　then；　be　laid　down　as　the　first　law　of　friendship；　that
_we　should　ask　from　friends；　and　do　for　friends'；　only　what　is
good_。　　But　do　not　let　us　wait　to　be　asked　either：　let　there　be　ever
an　eager　readiness；　and　an　absence　of　hesitation。　Let　us　have　the
courage　to　give　advice　with　candour。　　In　friendship；　let　the
influence　of　friends　who　give　good　advice　be　paramount；　and　let
this　influence　be　used　to　enforce　advice　not　only　in　plain…spoken
terms；　but　sometimes；　if　the　case　demands　it；　with　sharpness；　and
when　so　used；　let　it　be　obeyed。

I　give　you　these　rules　because　I　believe　that　some　wonderful
opinions　are　entertained　by　certain　persons　who　have；　I　am　told；　a
reputation　for　wisdom　in　Greece。　　There　is　nothing　in　the　world；　by
the　way；　beyond　the　reach　of　their　sophistry。　　Well；　some　of　them
teach　that　we　should　avoid　very　close　friendships；　for　fear　that　one
man　should　have　to　endure　the　anxieties　of　several。　Each　man；　say
they；　has　enough　and　to　spare　on　his　own　hands；　it　is　too　bad　to　be
involved　in　the　cares　of　other　people。　The　wisest　course　is　to　hold
the　reins　of　friendship　as　loose　as　possible；　you　can　then　tighten　or
slacken　them　at　your　will。　For　the　first　condition　of　a　happy　life　is
freedom　from　care；　which　no　one's　mind　can　enjoy　if　it　has　to
travail；　so　to　speak；　for　others　besides　itself。　Another　sect；　I　am
told；　gives　vent　to　opinions　still　less　generous。　　I　briefly　touched　on
this　subject　just　now。　　They　affirm　that　friendships　should　be
sought　solely　for　the　sake　of　the　assistance　they　give；　and　not　at　all
from　motives　of　feeling　and　affection；　and　that　therefore　just　in
proportion　as　a　man's　power　and　means　of　support　are　lowest；　he　is
most　eager　to　gain。　friendships：　thence　it　comes　that　weak　women
seek　the　support　of　friendship　more　than　men；　the　poor　more　than
the　rich；　the　unfortunate　rather　than　those　esteemed　prosperous。　
What　noble　philosophy！　You　might　just　as　well　take　the　sun　out　of
the　sky　as　friendship　from　life；　for　the　immortal　gods　have　given
us　nothing　better　or　more　delightful。

But　let　us　examine　the　two　doctrines。　What　is　the　value　of　this　〃
freedom　from　care〃？　It　is　very　tempting　at　first　sight；　but　in
practice　it　has　in　many　cases　to　be　put　on　one　side。　For　there　is　no
business　and　no　course　of　action　demanded　from　us　by　our　honour
which　you　can　consistently　decline；　or　lay　aside　when　begun；　from
a　mere　wish　to　escape　from　anxiety。　Nay；　if　we　wish　to　avoid
anxiety　we　must　avoid　virtue　itself；　which　necessarily　involves
some　anxious　thoughts　in　showing　its　loathing　and　abhorrence　for
the　qualities　which　are　opposite　to　itself…as　kindness　for　ill…nature；
self…control　for　licentiousness；　courage　for　cowardice。　Thus　you
may　notice　that　it　is　the　just　who　are　most　pained　at　injustice；　the
brave　at　cowardly　actions；　the　temperate　at　depravity。　It　is　then
characteristic　of　a　rightly　ordered　mind　to　be　pleased　at　what　is
good　and　grieved　at　the　reverse。　Seeing　then　that　the　wise　are　not
exempt　from　the　heart…ache　（which　must　be　the　case　unless　we
suppose　all　human　nature　rooted　out　of　their　hearts）；　why　should
we　banish　friendship　from　our　lives；　for　fear　of　being　involved　by
it　in　some　amount　of　distress？　If　you　take　away　emotion；　what
difference　remains　I　don't　say　between　a　man　and　a　beast；　but
between　a　man　and　a　stone　or　a　log　of　wood；　or　anything　else　of
that　kind？

Neither　should　we　give　any　weight　to　the　doctrine　that　virtue　is
something　rigid　and　unyielding　as　iron。　　In　point　of　fact　it　is　in
regard　to　friendship；　as　in　so　many　other　things；　so　supple　and
sensitive　that　it　expands；　so　to　speak；　at　a　friend's　good　fortune；
contracts　at　his　misfortunes。　We　conclude　then　that　mental　pain
which　we　must　often　encounter　on　a　friend's　account　is　not　of
sufficient　consequence　to　banish　friendship　from　our　life；　any
more　than　it　is　true　that　the　cardinal　virtues　are　to　be　dispensed
with　because　they　involve　certain　anxieties　and　distresses。

14。　Let　me　repeat　then；　〃the　clear　indication　of　virtue；　to　which　a
mind　of　like　character　is　naturally　attracted；　is　the　beginning　of
friendship。〃　When　that　is　the　case　the　rise　of　affection　is　a
necessity。　For　what　can　be　more　irrational　than　to　take　delight　in
many　objects　incapable　of　response；　such　as　office；　fame；　splendid
buildings；　and　personal　decoration；　and　yet　to　take　little　or　none　in
a　sentient　being　endowed　with　virtue；　which　has　the　faculty　of
loving　or；　if　I　may　use　the　expression；　loving　back？　For　nothing　is
really　more　delightful　than　a　return　of　affection；　and　the　mutual
interchange　of　kind　feeling　and　good　offices。　And　if　we　add；　as　we
may　fairly　do；　that　nothing　so　powerfully　attracts　and　draws　one
thing　to　itself　as　likeness　does　to　friendship；　it　wilt　at　once　be
admitted　to　be　true　that　the　good　love　the　good　and　attach　them　to
themselves　as　though　they　were　united　by　blood　and　nature。　For
nothing　can　be　more　eager；　or　rather　greedy；　for　what　is　like　itself
than　nature。　So；　my　dear　Fannius　and　Scaevola；　we　may　look　upon
this　as　an　established　fact；　that　between　good　men　there　is；　as　it
were　of　necessity；　a　kindly　feeling；　which　is　the　source　of
friendship　ordained　by　nature。　　But　this　same　kindliness　affects　the
many　also。　　For　that　is　no　unsympathetic　or　selfish　or　exclusive
virtue；　which　protects　even　whole　nations　and　consults　their　best
interests。　And　that　certainly　it　would　not　have　done　had　it
disdained　all　affection　for　the　common　herd。

Again；　the　believers　in　the　〃interest〃　theory　appear　to　me　to　destroy
the　most　attractive　link　in　the　chain　of　friendship。　For　it　is　not　so
much　what　one　gets　by　a　friend　that　gives　one　pleasure；　as　the
warmth　of　his　feeling；　and　we　only　care　for　a　friend's　service　if　it
has　been　prompted　by　affection。　And　so　far　from　its　being　true　that
lack　of　means　is　a　motive　for　seeking　friendship；　it　is　usually　those
who　being　most　richly　endowed　with　wealth　and　means；　and　above
all　with　virtue　（which；　after　all；　is　a　man's　best　support）；　are　least
in　need　of　another；　that　are　most　openhanded　and　beneficent。
Indeed　I　am　inclined　to　think　that　friends　ought　at　times　to　be　in
want　of　something。　For　instance；　what　scope　would　my　affections
have　had　if　Scipio　had　never　wanted　my　advice　or　co…operation　at
home　or　abroad？　It　is　not　friendship；　then；　that　follows　material
advantage；　but　material　advantage　friendship。

15。　We　must　not　therefore　listen　to　these　superfine　gentlemen
when　they　talk　of　friendship；　which　they　know　neither　in　theory
nor　in　practice。　For　who；　in　heaven's　name；　would　choose　a　life　of
the　greatest　wealth　and　abundance　on　condition　of　neither　loving
or　being　beloved　by　any　creature？　That　is　the　sort　of　life　tyrants
endure。　They；　of　course；　can　count　on　no　fidelity；　no　affection；　no
security　for　the　goodwill　of　any　one。　For　them　all　is　suspicion　and
anxiety；　for　them　there　is　no　possibility　of　friendship。　Who　can
love　one　whom　he　fears；　or　by　whom　he　knows　that　he　is　feared？
Yet　such　men　have　a　show　of　friendship　offered　them；　but　it　is
only　a　fair…weather　show。　If　it　ever　happen　that　they　fall；　as　it
generally　does；　they　will　at　once　understand　how　friendless　they
are。　　So　they　say　Tarquin　observed　in　his　exile　that　he　never　knew
which　of　his　friends　were　real　and　which　sham；　until　he　had　ceased
to　be　able　to　repay　either。　　Though　what　surprises　me　is　that　a　man
of　his　proud　and　overbearing　character　should　have　a　friend　at　all。
And　as　it　was　his　character　that　prevented　his　having　genuine
friends；　so　it　often　happens　in　the　case　of　men　of　unusually　great
means…their　very　wealth　forbids　faithful　friendships。　For　not　only　is
Fortune　blind　herself；　but　she　generally　makes　those　blind　also
who　enjoy　her　favours。　They　are　carried；　so　to　speak；　beyond
themselves　with　self…conceit　and　self…will；　nor　can　anything　be
more　perfectly　intolerable　than　a　successful　fool。　　You　may　often
see　it。　Men　who　before　had　pleasant　manners　enough　undergo　a
complete　change　on　attaining　power　of　office。　They　despise　their
old　friends：　devote　themselves　to　new。

Now；　can　anything　be　more　foolish　than　that　men　who　have　all　the
opportunities　which　prosperity；　wealth；　and　great　means　can
besto