lecture03-第4节

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！





indifferent；　and　I　can　now　see　that　my　old　experience　was



probably　exactly　the　same　thing　as　the　prayers　of　the　orthodox；



only　I　did　not　call　them　by　that　name。　　What　I　have　spoken　of　as



'It'　was　practically　not　Spencer's　Unknowable；　but　just　my　own



instinctive　and　individual　God；　whom　I　relied　upon　for　higher



sympathy；　but　whom　somehow　I　have　lost。〃







Nothing　is　more　common　in　the　pages　of　religious　biography　than



the　way　in　which　seasons　of　lively　and　of　difficult　faith　are



described　as　alternating。　　Probably　every　religious　person　has



the　recollection　of　particular　crisis　in　which　a　directer　vision



of　the　truth；　a　direct　perception；　perhaps；　of　a　living　God's



existence；　swept　in　and　overwhelmed　the　languor　of　the　more



ordinary　belief。　　In　James　Russell　Lowell's　correspondence　there



is　a　brief　memorandum　of　an　experience　of　this　kind：







〃I　had　a　revelation　last　Friday　evening。　　I　was　at　Mary's；　and



happening　to　say　something　of　the　presence　of　spirits　（of　whom；　I



said；　I　was　often　dimly　aware）；　Mr。　Putnam　entered　into　an



argument　with　me　on　spiritual　matters。　　As　I　was　speaking；　the



whole　system　rose　up　before　me　like　a　vague　destiny　looming　from



the　Abyss。　　I　never　before　so　clearly　felt　the　Spirit　of　God　in



me　and　around　rue。　　The　whole　room　seemed　to　me　full　of　God。　　The



air　seemed　to　waver　to　and　fro　with　the　presence　of　Something　I



knew　not　what。　　I　spoke　with　the　calmness　and　clearness　of　a



prophet。　　I　cannot　tell　you　what　this　revelation　was。　　I　have　not



yet　studied　it　enough。　　But　I　shall　perfect　it　one　day；　and　then



you　shall　hear　it　and　acknowledge　its　grandeur。〃＇27＇







＇27＇　Letters　of　Lowell；　i。　75。















　Here　is　a　longer　and　more　developed　experience　from　a



manuscript　communication　by　a　clergymanI　take　it　from



Starbuck's　manuscript　collection：







〃I　remember　the　night；　and　almost　the　very　spot　on　the　hill…top；



where　my　soul　opened　out；　as　it　were；　into　the　Infinite；　and



there　was　a　rushing　together　of　the　two　worlds；　the　inner　and　the



outer。　　It　was　deep　calling　unto　deepthe　deep　that　my　own



struggle　had　opened　up　within　being　answered　by　the　unfathomable



deep　without；　reaching　beyond　the　stars。　　I　stood　alone　with　Him



who　had　made　me；　and　all　the　beauty　of　the　world；　and　love；　and



sorrow；　and　even　temptation。　　I　did　not　seek　Him；　but　felt　the



perfect　unison　of　my　spirit　with　His。　　The　ordinary　sense　of



things　around　me　faded。　　For　the　moment　nothing　but　an　ineffable



joy　and　exultation　remained。　　It　is　impossible　fully　to　describe



the　experience。　　It　was　like　the　effect　of　some　great　orchestra



when　all　the　separate　notes　have　melted　into　one　swelling　harmony



that　leaves　the　listener　conscious　of　nothing　save　that　his　soul



is　being　wafted　upwards；　and　almost　bursting　with　its　own



emotion。　　The　perfect　stillness　of　the　night　was　thrilled　by　a



more　solemn　silence。　　The　darkness　held　a　presence　that　was　all



the　more　felt　because　it　was　not　seen。　　I　could　not　any　more　have



doubted　that　HE　was　there　than　that　I　was。　　Indeed；　I　felt　myself



to　be；　if　possible；　the　less　real　of　the　two。







〃My　highest　faith　in　God　and　truest　idea　of　him　were　then　born　in



me。　　I　have　stood　upon　the　Mount　of　Vision　since；　and　felt　the



Eternal　round　about　me。　　But　never　since　has　there　come　quite　the



same　stirring　of　the　heart。　　Then；　if　ever；　I　believe；　I　stood



face　to　face　with　God；　and　was　born　anew　of　his　spirit。　There



was；　as　I　recall　it；　no　sudden　change　of　thought　or　of　belief；



except　that　my　early　crude　conception；　had；　as　it　were　burst　into



flower。　　There　was　no　destruction　of　the　old；　but　a　rapid；



wonderful　unfolding。　　Since　that　time　no　discussion　that　I　have



heard　of　the　proofs　of　God's　existence　has　been　able　to　shake　my



faith。　　Having　once　felt　the　presence　of　God's　spirit；　I　have



never　lost　it　again　for　long。　　My　most　assuring　evidence　of　his



existence　is　deeply　rooted　in　that　hour　of　vision　in　the　memory



of　that　supreme　experience；　and　in　the　conviction；　gained　from



reading　and　reflection；　that　something　the　same　has　come　to　all



who　have　found　God。　　I　am　aware　that　it　may　justly　be　called



mystical。　　I　am　not　enough　acquainted　with　philosophy　to　defend



it　from　that　or　any　other　charge。　　I　feel　that　in　writing　of　it　I



have　overlaid　it　with　words　rather　than　put　it　clearly　to　your



thought。　　But；　such　as　it　is；　I　have　described　it　as　carefully　as



I　now　am　able　to　do。〃







Here　is　another　document；　even　more　definite　in　character；　which；



the　writer　being　a　Swiss；　I　translate　from　the　French



original。＇28＇







＇28＇　I　borrow　it；　with　Professor　Flournoy's　permission；　from　his



rich　collection　of　psychological　documents。















〃I　was　in　perfect　health：　　we　were　on　our　sixth　day　of　tramping；



and　in　good　training。　　We　had　come　the　day　before　from　Sixt　to



Trient　by　Buet。　　I　felt　neither　fatigue；　hunger；　nor　thirst；　and



my　state　of　mind　was　equally　healthy。　　I　had　had　at　Forlaz　good



news　from　home；　I　was　subject　to　no　anxiety；　either　near　or



remote；　for　we　had　a　good　guide；　and　there　was　not　a　shadow　of



uncertainty　about　the　road　we　should　follow。　　I　can　best　describe



the　condition　in　which　I　was　by　calling　it　a　state　of



equilibrium。　　When　all　at　once　I　experienced　a　feeling　of　being



raised　above　myself；　I　felt　the　presence　of　GodI　tell　of　the



thing　just　as　I　was　conscious　of　itas　if　his　goodness　and　his



power　were　penetrating　me　altogether。　　The　throb　of　emotion　was



so　violent　that　I　could　barely　tell　the　boys　to　pass　on　and　not



wait　for　me。　　I　then　sat　down　on　a　stone；　unable　to　stand　any



longer；　and　my　eyes　overflowed　with　tears。　　I　thanked　God　that　in



the　course　of　my　life　he　had　taught　me　to　know　him；　that　he



sustained　my　life　and　took　pity　both　on　the　insignificant



creature　and　on　the　sinner　that　I　was。　　I　begged　him　ardently



that　my　life　might　be　consecrated　to　the　doing　of　his　will。　　I



felt　his　reply；　which　was　that　I　should　do　his　will　from　day　to



day　in　humility　and　poverty；　leaving　him；　the　Almighty　God；　to　be



judge　of　whether　I　should　some　time　be　called　to　bear　witness



more　conspicuously。　　Then；　slowly；　the　ecstasy　left　my　heart；



that　is；　I　felt　that　God　had　withdrawn　the　communion　which　he　had



granted；　and　I　was　able　to　walk　on；　but　very　slowly；　so　strongly



was　I　still　possessed　by　the　interior　emotion。　Besides；　I　had



wept　uninterruptedly　for　several　minutes；　my　eyes　were　swollen；



and　I　did　not　wish　my　companions　to　see　me。　　The　state　of　ecstasy



may　have　lasted　four　or　five　minutes；　although　it　seemed　at　the



time　to　last　much　longer。　　My　comrades　waited　for　me　ten　minutes



at　the　cross　of　Barine；　but　I　took　about　twenty…five　or　thirty



minutes　to　join　them；　for　as　well　as　I　can　remember；　they　said



that　I　had　kept　them　back　for　about　half　an　hour。　　The　impression



had　been　so　profound　that　in　climbing　slowly　the　slope　I　asked



myself　if　it　were　possible　that　Moses　on　Sinai　could　have　had　a



more　intimate　communication　with　God。　　I　think　it　well　to　add



that　in　this　ecstasy　of　mine　God　had　neither　form；　color；　odor；



nor　taste；　moreover；　that　the　feeling　of　his　presence　was



accompanied　with　no　determinate　localization。　It　was　rather　as　if



my　personality　had　been　transformed　by　the　presence　of　a



SPIRITUAL　SPIRIT。　　But　the　more　I　seek　words　to　express　this



intimate　intercourse；　the　more　I　feel　the　impossibility　of



describing　the　thing　by　any　of　our　usual　images。　　At　bottom　the



expression　most　apt　to　render　what　I　felt　is　this：　　God　was



present；　though　invisible；　he　fell　under　no　one　of　my　senses；　yet



my　consciousness　perceived　him。〃







The　adjective　〃mystical〃　is　technically　applied；　most　often。　to



states　that　are　of　brief　duration。　　Of　course　such　hours　of



rapture　as　the　last　two　persons　describe　are　mystical



experiences；　of　which　in　a　later　lecture　I　shall　have　much　to



say。　　Meanwhile　here　is　the　abridged　record　of　another　mystical



or　semi…mystical　experience；　in　a　mind　evidently　framed　by　nature



for　ardent　piety。　　I　owe　it　to　Starbuck's　collection。　　The　lady



who　gives　the　account　is　the　daughter　of　a　man　well　known　in　his



time　as　a　writer　against　Christianity。　　The　suddenness　of　her



conversion　shows　well　how　native　the　sense　of　God's　presence　must



be　to　certain　minds。　　She　relates　that　she　was　brought　up　in



entire　ignorance　of　Christian　doctrine；　but；　when　in　Germany；



after　being　talked　to　by　Christian　friends；　she　read　the　Bible



and