my discovery of england-第8节

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to　work。　At　the　same　time；　the　German　producer　by　depressing　the　mark　further　and　further　is　able　to　work　fourteen　hours　a　day。　This　argument　may　not　be　quite　correct　but　I　take　it　as　I　find　it　in　the　London　Press。　Whether　I　state　it　correctly　or　not；　it　is　quite　plain　that　the　problem　is　insoluble。　That　is　all　that　is　needed　in　first　class　politics。

A　really　good　question　like　the　German　reparation　question　will　go　on　for　a　century。　Undoubtedly　in　the　year　2000　A。D。；　a　British　Chancellor　of　the　Exchequer　will　still　be　explaining　that　the　government　is　fully　resolved　that　Germany　shall　pay　to　the　last　farthing　（cheers）：　but　that　ministers　have　no　intention　of　allowing　the　German　payment　to　take　a　form　that　will　undermine　British　industry　（wild　applause）：　that　the　German　indemnity　shall　be　so　paid　that　without　weakening　the　power　of　the　Germans。　to　buy　from　us　it　shall　increase　our　power　of　selling　to　them。

Such　questions　last　forever。

On　the　other　hand　sometimes　by　sheer　carelessness　a　question　gets　settled　and　passes　out　of　politics。　This；　so　we　are　given　to　understand；　has　happened　to　the　Irish　question。　It　is　settled。　A　group　of　Irish　delegates　and　British　ministers　got　together　round　a　table　and　settled　it。　The　settlement　has　since　been　celebrated　at　a　demonstration　of　brotherhood　by　the　Irish　Americans　of　New　York　with　only　six　casualties。　Henceforth　the　Irish　question　passes　into　history。　There　may　be　some　odd　fighting　along　the　Ulster　border；　or　a　little　civil　war　with　perhaps　a　little　revolution　every　now　and　then；　but　as　a　question　the　thing　is　finished。

I　must　say　that　I　for　one　am　very　sorry　to　think　that　the　Irish　question　is　gone。　We　shall　miss　it　greatly。　Debating　societies　which　have　flourished　on　it　ever　since　1886　will　be　wrecked　for　want　of　it。　Dinner　parties　will　now　lose　half　the　sparkle　of　their　conversation。　It　will　be　no　longer　possible　to　make　use　of　such　good　old　remarks　as；　〃After　all　the　Irish　are　a　gifted　people；〃　or；　〃You　must　remember　that　fifty　per　cent　of　the　great　English　generals　were　Irish。〃

The　settlement　turned　out　to　be　a　very　simple　affair。　Ireland　was　merely　given　dominion　status。　What　that　is；　no　one　knows；　but　it　means　that　the　Irish　have　now　got　it　and　that　they　sink　from　the　high　place　that　they　had　in　the　white　light　of　publicity　to　the　level　of　the　Canadians　or　the　New　Zealanders。

Whether　it　is　quite　a　proper　thing　to　settle　trouble　by　conferring　dominion　status　on　it；　is　open　to　question。　It　is　a　practice　that　is　bound　to　spread。　It　is　rumoured　that　it　is　now　contemplated　to　confer　dominion　status　upon　the　Borough　of　Poplar　and　on　the　Cambridge　undergraduates。　It　is　even　understood　that　at　the　recent　disarmament　conference　England　offered　to　confer　dominion　status　on　the　United　States。　President　Harding　would　assuredly　have　accepted　it　at　once　but　for　the　protest　of　Mr。　Briand；　who　claimed　that　any　such　offer　must　be　accompanied　by　a　permission　to　increase　the　French　fire…brigade　by　fifty　per　cent。

It　is　lamentable；　too；　that　at　the　very　same　moment　when　the　Irish　question　was　extinguished；　the　Naval　Question　which　had　lasted　for　nearly　fifty　years　was　absolutely　obliterated　by　disarmament。　Henceforth　the　alarm　of　invasion　is　a　thing　of　the　past　and　the　navy　practically　needless。　Beyond　keeping　a　fleet　in　the　North　Sea　and　one　on　the　Mediterranean；　and　maintaining　a　patrol　all　round　the　rim　of　the　Pacific　Ocean；　Britain　will　cease　to　be　a　naval　power。　　A　mere　annual　expenditure　of　fifty　million　pounds　sterling　will　suffice　for　such　thin　pretence　of　naval　preparedness　as　a　disarmed　nation　will　have　to　maintain。

This　thing　too；　came　as　a　surprise；　or　at　least　a　surprise　to　the　general　public　who　are　unaware　of　the　workings　of　diplomacy。　Those　who　know　about　such　things　were　fully　aware　of　what　would　happen　if　a　whole　lot　of　British　sailors　and　diplomatists　and　journalists　were　exposed　to　the　hospitalities　of　Washington。　The　British　and　Americans　are　both　alike。　You　can't　drive　them　or　lead　them　or　coerce　them；　but　if　you　give　them　a　cigar　they'll　do　anything。　　The　inner　history　of　the　conference　is　only　just　beginning　to　be　known。　But　it　is　whispered　that　immediately　on　his　arrival　Mr。　　Balfour　was　given　a　cigar　by　President　Harding。　Mr。　Balfour　at　once　offered　to　scrap　five　ships；　and　invited　the　entire　American　cabinet　into　the　British　Embassy；　where　Sir　A。　Geddes　was　rash　enough　to　offer　them　champagne。

The　American　delegates　immediately　offered　to　scrap　ten　ships。　Mr。　Balfour；　who　simply　cannot　be　outdone　in　international　courtesy；　saw　the　ten　and　raised　it　to　twenty。　President　Harding　saw　the　twenty；　raised　it　to　thirty；　and　sent　out　for　more　poker　chips。

At　the　close　of　the　play　Lord　Beatty；　who　is　urbanity　itself；　offered　to　scrap　Portsmouth　Dockyard；　and　asked　if　anybody　present　would　like　Canada。　President　Harding　replied　with　his　customary　tact　that　if　England　wanted　the　Philippines；　he　would　think　it　what　he　would　term　a　residuum　of　normalcy　to　give　them　away。　There　is　no　telling　what　might　have　happened　had　not　Mr。　Briand　interposed　to　say　that　any　transfer　of　the　Philippines　must　be　regarded　as　a　signal　for　a　twenty　per　cent　increase　in　the　Boy　Scouts　of　France。　As　a　tactful　conclusion　to　the　matter　President　Harding　raised　Mr。　Balfour　to　the　peerage。

As　things　are；　disarmament　coming　along　with　the　Irish　settlement；　leaves　English　politics　in　a　bad　way。　The　general　outlook　is　too　peaceful　altogether。　One　looks　round　almost　in　vain　for　any　of　those　〃strained　relations〃　which　used　to　be　the　very　basis　of　English　foreign　policy。　In　only　one　direction　do　I　see　light　for　English　politics；　and　that　is　over　towards　Czecho…Slovakia。　It　appears　that　Czecho…Slovakia　owes　the　British　Exchequer　fifty　million　sterling。　I　cannot　quote　the　exact　figure；　but　it　is　either　fifty　million　or　fifty　billion。　In　either　case　Czecho…Slovakia　is　unable　to　pay。　The　announcement　has　just　been　made　by　M。　Sgitzch；　the　new　treasurer；　that　the　country　is　bankrupt　or　at　least　that　he　sees　his　way　to　make　it　so　in　a　week。

It　has　been　at　once　reported　in　City　circles　that　there　are　〃strained　relations〃　between　Great　Britain　and　Czecho…Slovakia。　Now　what　I　advise　is；　that　if　the　relations　are　strained；　keep　them　so。　England　has　lost　nearly　all　the　strained　relations　she　ever　had；　let　her　cherish　the　few　that　she　still　has。　I　know　that　there　are　other　opinions。　The　suggestion　has　been　at　once　made　for　a　〃round　table　conference；〃　at　which　the　whole　thing　can　be　freely　discussed　without　formal　protocols　and　something　like　a　〃gentleman's　agreement〃　reached。　I　say；　don't　do　it。　England　is　being　ruined　by　these　round　table　conferences。　They　are　sitting　round　in　Cairo　and　Calcutta　and　Capetown；　filling　all　the　best　hotels　and　eating　out　the　substance　of　the　taxpayer。

I　am　told　that　Lloyd　George　has　offered　to　go　to　Czecho…Slovakia。　He　should　be　stopped。　It　is　said　that　Professor　Keynes　has　proved　that　the　best　way　to　deal　with　the　debt　of　Czecho…Slovakia　is　to　send　them　whatever　cash　we　have　left；　thereby　turning　the　exchange　upside　down　on　them；　and　forcing　them　to　buy　all　their　Christmas　presents　in　Manchester。

It　is　wiser　not　to　do　anything　of　the　sort。　England　should　send　them　a　good　old…fashioned　ultimatum；　mobilise　all　the　naval　officers　at　the　Embankment　hotels；　raise　the　income　tax　another　sixpence；　and　defy　them。

If　that　were　done　it　might　prove　a　successful　first　step　in　bringing　English　politics　back　to　the　high　plane　of　conversational　interest　from　which　they　are　threatening　to　fall。



V。　…　Oxford　as　I　See　It

MY　private　station　being　that　of　a　university　professor；　I　was　naturally　deeply　interested　in　the　system　of　education　in　England。　I　was　therefore　led　to　make　a　special　visit　to　Oxford　and　to　submit　the　place　to　a　searching　scrutiny。　Arriving　one　afternoon　at　four　o'clock；　I　stayed　at　the　Mitre　Hotel　and　did　not　leave　until　eleven　o'clock　next　morning。　The　whole　of　this　time；　except　for　one　hour　spent　in　addressing　the　undergraduates；　was　devoted　to　a　close　and　eager　study　of　the　great　university。　When　I　add　to　this　that　I　had　already　visited　Oxford　in　1907　and　spent　a　Sunday　at　All　Souls　with　Colonel　L。　S。　Amery；　it　will　be　seen　at　once　that　my　views　on　Oxford　are　based　upon　observations　extending　over　fourteen　years。

At　any　rate　I　can　at　least　claim　that　my　acquaintance　with　the　British　university　is　just　as　good　a　basis　for　reflection　and　judgment　as　that　of　the　numerous　English　critics　who　come　to　our　side　of　the　water。　I　have　known　a　famous　English　author　to　arrive　at　Harvard　University　in　the　morning；　have　lunch　with　President　Lowell；　and　then　write　a　whole　chapter　on　the　Excellence　of　Higher　Education　in　America。　I　have　known　another　one　come　to　Harvard；　have　lunch　with　President　Lowell；　and　do　an　entire　book　on　the　Decline　of　Serious　Study　in　America。　Or　take　the　case　of　my　own　university。　I　remember　Mr。　Rudyard　Kipling　coming　to　McGill　and　saying　in　his　address　to　the　undergraduates　at　2。30　P。M。；　〃You　have　here　a　great　institution。〃　But　how　could　he　have　gathered　this　information？　As　far　as　I　know　he　spent　the　entire　morning　with　Sir　Andrew　Macphail　in　his　house　beside　the　campus；　smoking　cigarettes。　When　I　add　that　he　distinctly　refused　to　vi