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here¡¡was¡¡one¡¡advantage¡¡about¡¡it£»¡¡and¡¡that¡¡was£»¡¡that¡¡she¡¡could¡¡not¡¡tumble¡¡out¡¡of¡¡bed£»¡¡seeing¡¡there¡¡was¡¡nowhere¡¡to¡¡tumble£»¡¡and£»¡¡on¡¡being¡¡shown¡¡the¡¡kitchen£»¡¡she¡¡observed¡¡that¡¡she¡¡should¡¡like¡¡it¡¡for¡¡two¡¡thingsone¡¡was¡¡that¡¡she¡¡could¡¡sit¡¡in¡¡the¡¡middle¡¡and¡¡reach¡¡everything¡¡without¡¡getting¡¡up£»¡¡the¡¡other£»¡¡that¡¡nobody¡¡else¡¡could¡¡come¡¡into¡¡the¡¡apartment¡¡while¡¡she¡¡was¡¡there¡£

¡¨You¡¡see£»¡¡Amenda£»¡¨¡¡explained¡¡Ethelbertha¡¡apologetically£»¡¡¡¨we¡¡shall¡¡really¡¡live¡¡outside¡£¡¨

¡¨Yes£»¡¡mum£»¡¨¡¡answered¡¡Amenda£»¡¡¡¨I¡¡should¡¡say¡¡that¡¡would¡¡be¡¡the¡¡best¡¡place¡¡to¡¡do¡¡it¡£¡¨

If¡¡only¡¡we¡¡could¡¡have¡¡lived¡¡more¡¡outside£»¡¡the¡¡life¡¡might¡¡have¡¡been¡¡pleasant¡¡enough£»¡¡but¡¡the¡¡weather¡¡rendered¡¡it¡¡impossible£»¡¡six¡¡days¡¡out¡¡of¡¡the¡¡seven£»¡¡for¡¡us¡¡to¡¡do¡¡more¡¡than¡¡look¡¡out¡¡of¡¡the¡¡window¡¡and¡¡feel¡¡thankful¡¡that¡¡we¡¡had¡¡a¡¡roof¡¡over¡¡our¡¡heads¡£

I¡¡have¡¡known¡¡wet¡¡summers¡¡before¡¡and¡¡since¡£¡¡¡¡I¡¡have¡¡learnt¡¡by¡¡many¡¡bitter¡¡experiences¡¡the¡¡danger¡¡and¡¡foolishness¡¡of¡¡leaving¡¡the¡¡shelter¡¡of¡¡London¡¡any¡¡time¡¡between¡¡the¡¡first¡¡of¡¡May¡¡and¡¡the¡¡thirty¡­first¡¡of¡¡October¡£¡¡¡¡Indeed£»¡¡the¡¡country¡¡is¡¡always¡¡associate¡¡in¡¡my¡¡mind¡¡with¡¡recollections¡¡of¡¡long£»¡¡weary¡¡days¡¡passed¡¡in¡¡the¡¡pitiless¡¡rain£»¡¡and¡¡sad¡¡evenings¡¡spent¡¡in¡¡other¡¡people's¡¡clothes¡£¡¡¡¡But¡¡never¡¡have¡¡I¡¡known£»¡¡and¡¡never£»¡¡I¡¡pray¡¡night¡¡and¡¡morning£»¡¡may¡¡I¡¡know¡¡again£»¡¡such¡¡a¡¡summer¡¡as¡¡the¡¡one¡¡we¡¡lived¡¡through¡¡£¨though¡¡none¡¡of¡¡us¡¡expected¡¡to£©¡¡on¡¡that¡¡confounded¡¡houseboat¡£

In¡¡the¡¡morning¡¡we¡¡would¡¡be¡¡awakened¡¡by¡¡the¡¡rain's¡¡forcing¡¡its¡¡way¡¡through¡¡the¡¡window¡¡and¡¡wetting¡¡the¡¡bed£»¡¡and¡¡would¡¡get¡¡up¡¡and¡¡mop¡¡out¡¡the¡¡saloon¡£¡¡¡¡After¡¡breakfast¡¡I¡¡would¡¡try¡¡to¡¡work£»¡¡but¡¡the¡¡beating¡¡of¡¡the¡¡hail¡¡upon¡¡the¡¡roof¡¡just¡¡over¡¡my¡¡head¡¡would¡¡drive¡¡every¡¡idea¡¡out¡¡of¡¡my¡¡brain£»¡¡and£»¡¡after¡¡a¡¡wasted¡¡hour¡¡or¡¡two£»¡¡I¡¡would¡¡fling¡¡down¡¡my¡¡pen¡¡and¡¡hunt¡¡up¡¡Ethelbertha£»¡¡and¡¡we¡¡would¡¡put¡¡on¡¡our¡¡mackintoshes¡¡and¡¡take¡¡our¡¡umbrellas¡¡and¡¡go¡¡out¡¡for¡¡a¡¡row¡£¡¡¡¡At¡¡mid¡­day¡¡we¡¡would¡¡return¡¡and¡¡put¡¡on¡¡some¡¡dry¡¡clothes£»¡¡and¡¡sit¡¡down¡¡to¡¡dinner¡£

In¡¡the¡¡afternoon¡¡the¡¡storm¡¡generally¡¡freshened¡¡up¡¡a¡¡bit£»¡¡and¡¡we¡¡were¡¡kept¡¡pretty¡¡busy¡¡rushing¡¡about¡¡with¡¡towels¡¡and¡¡cloths£»¡¡trying¡¡to¡¡prevent¡¡the¡¡water¡¡from¡¡coming¡¡into¡¡the¡¡rooms¡¡and¡¡swamping¡¡us¡£¡¡During¡¡tea¡­time¡¡the¡¡saloon¡¡was¡¡usually¡¡illuminated¡¡by¡¡forked¡¡lightning¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡evenings¡¡we¡¡spent¡¡in¡¡baling¡¡out¡¡the¡¡boat£»¡¡after¡¡which¡¡we¡¡took¡¡it¡¡in¡¡turns¡¡to¡¡go¡¡into¡¡the¡¡kitchen¡¡and¡¡warm¡¡ourselves¡£¡¡At¡¡eight¡¡we¡¡supped£»¡¡and¡¡from¡¡then¡¡until¡¡it¡¡was¡¡time¡¡to¡¡go¡¡to¡¡bed¡¡we¡¡sat¡¡wrapped¡¡up¡¡in¡¡rugs£»¡¡listening¡¡to¡¡the¡¡roaring¡¡of¡¡the¡¡thunder£»¡¡and¡¡the¡¡howling¡¡of¡¡the¡¡wind£»¡¡and¡¡the¡¡lashing¡¡of¡¡the¡¡waves£»¡¡and¡¡wondering¡¡whether¡¡the¡¡boat¡¡would¡¡hold¡¡out¡¡through¡¡the¡¡night¡£

Friends¡¡would¡¡come¡¡down¡¡to¡¡spend¡¡the¡¡day¡¡with¡¡uselderly£»¡¡irritable¡¡people£»¡¡fond¡¡of¡¡warmth¡¡and¡¡comfort£»¡¡people¡¡who¡¡did¡¡not£»¡¡as¡¡a¡¡rule£»¡¡hanker¡¡after¡¡jaunts£»¡¡even¡¡under¡¡the¡¡most¡¡favourable¡¡conditions£»¡¡but¡¡who¡¡had¡¡been¡¡persuaded¡¡by¡¡our¡¡silly¡¡talk¡¡that¡¡a¡¡day¡¡on¡¡the¡¡river¡¡would¡¡be¡¡to¡¡them¡¡like¡¡a¡¡Saturday¡¡to¡¡Monday¡¡in¡¡Paradise¡£

They¡¡would¡¡arrive¡¡soaked£»¡¡and¡¡we¡¡would¡¡shut¡¡them¡¡up¡¡in¡¡different¡¡bunks£»¡¡and¡¡leave¡¡them¡¡to¡¡strip¡¡themselves¡¡and¡¡put¡¡on¡¡things¡¡of¡¡Ethelbertha's¡¡or¡¡of¡¡mine¡£¡¡¡¡But¡¡Ethel¡¡and¡¡I£»¡¡in¡¡those¡¡days£»¡¡were¡¡slim£»¡¡so¡¡that¡¡stout£»¡¡middle¡­aged¡¡people¡¡in¡¡our¡¡clothes¡¡neither¡¡looked¡¡well¡¡nor¡¡felt¡¡happy¡£

Upon¡¡their¡¡emerging¡¡we¡¡would¡¡take¡¡them¡¡into¡¡the¡¡saloon¡¡and¡¡try¡¡to¡¡entertain¡¡them¡¡by¡¡telling¡¡them¡¡what¡¡we¡¡had¡¡intended¡¡to¡¡do¡¡with¡¡them¡¡had¡¡the¡¡day¡¡been¡¡fine¡£¡¡¡¡But¡¡their¡¡answers¡¡were¡¡short£»¡¡and¡¡occasionally¡¡snappy£»¡¡and¡¡after¡¡a¡¡while¡¡the¡¡conversation¡¡would¡¡flag£»¡¡and¡¡we¡¡would¡¡sit¡¡round¡¡reading¡¡last¡¡week's¡¡newspapers¡¡and¡¡coughing¡£

The¡¡moment¡¡their¡¡own¡¡clothes¡¡were¡¡dry¡¡£¨we¡¡lived¡¡in¡¡a¡¡perpetual¡¡atmosphere¡¡of¡¡steaming¡¡clothes£©¡¡they¡¡would¡¡insist¡¡upon¡¡leaving¡¡us£»¡¡which¡¡seemed¡¡to¡¡me¡¡discourteous¡¡after¡¡all¡¡that¡¡we¡¡had¡¡done¡¡for¡¡them£»¡¡and¡¡would¡¡dress¡¡themselves¡¡once¡¡more¡¡and¡¡start¡¡off¡¡home£»¡¡and¡¡get¡¡wet¡¡again¡¡before¡¡they¡¡got¡¡there¡£

We¡¡would¡¡generally¡¡receive¡¡a¡¡letter¡¡a¡¡few¡¡days¡¡afterwards£»¡¡written¡¡by¡¡some¡¡relative£»¡¡informing¡¡us¡¡that¡¡both¡¡patients¡¡were¡¡doing¡¡as¡¡well¡¡as¡¡could¡¡be¡¡expected£»¡¡and¡¡promising¡¡to¡¡send¡¡us¡¡a¡¡card¡¡for¡¡the¡¡funeral¡¡in¡¡case¡¡of¡¡a¡¡relapse¡£

Our¡¡chief¡¡recreation£»¡¡our¡¡sole¡¡consolation£»¡¡during¡¡the¡¡long¡¡weeks¡¡of¡¡our¡¡imprisonment£»¡¡was¡¡to¡¡watch¡¡from¡¡our¡¡windows¡¡the¡¡pleasure¡­seekers¡¡passing¡¡by¡¡in¡¡small¡¡open¡¡boats£»¡¡and¡¡to¡¡reflect¡¡what¡¡an¡¡awful¡¡day¡¡they¡¡had¡¡had£»¡¡or¡¡were¡¡going¡¡to¡¡have£»¡¡as¡¡the¡¡case¡¡might¡¡be¡£

In¡¡the¡¡forenoon¡¡they¡¡would¡¡head¡¡up¡¡streamyoung¡¡men¡¡with¡¡their¡¡sweethearts£»¡¡nephews¡¡taking¡¡out¡¡their¡¡rich¡¡old¡¡aunts£»¡¡husbands¡¡and¡¡wives¡¡£¨some¡¡of¡¡them¡¡pairs£»¡¡some¡¡of¡¡them¡¡odd¡¡ones£©£»¡¡stylish¡­looking¡¡girls¡¡with¡¡cousins£»¡¡energetic¡­looking¡¡men¡¡with¡¡dogs£»¡¡high¡­class¡¡silent¡¡parties£»¡¡low¡­class¡¡noisy¡¡parties£»¡¡quarrelsome¡¡family¡¡parties¡­¡¡¡­boatload¡¡after¡¡boatload¡¡they¡¡went¡¡by£»¡¡wet£»¡¡but¡¡still¡¡hopeful£»¡¡pointing¡¡out¡¡bits¡¡of¡¡blue¡¡sky¡¡to¡¡each¡¡other¡£

In¡¡the¡¡evening¡¡they¡¡would¡¡return£»¡¡drenched¡¡and¡¡gloomy£»¡¡saying¡¡disagreeable¡¡things¡¡to¡¡one¡¡another¡£

One¡¡couple£»¡¡and¡¡one¡¡couple¡¡only£»¡¡out¡¡of¡¡the¡¡many¡¡hundreds¡¡that¡¡passed¡¡under¡¡our¡¡review£»¡¡came¡¡back¡¡from¡¡the¡¡ordeal¡¡with¡¡pleasant¡¡faces¡£¡¡¡¡He¡¡was¡¡rowing¡¡hard¡¡and¡¡singing£»¡¡with¡¡a¡¡handkerchief¡¡tied¡¡round¡¡his¡¡head¡¡to¡¡keep¡¡his¡¡hat¡¡on£»¡¡and¡¡she¡¡was¡¡laughing¡¡at¡¡him£»¡¡while¡¡trying¡¡to¡¡hold¡¡up¡¡an¡¡umbrella¡¡with¡¡one¡¡hand¡¡and¡¡steer¡¡with¡¡the¡¡other¡£

There¡¡are¡¡but¡¡two¡¡explanations¡¡to¡¡account¡¡for¡¡people¡¡being¡¡jolly¡¡on¡¡the¡¡river¡¡in¡¡the¡¡rain¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡one¡¡I¡¡dismissed¡¡as¡¡being¡¡both¡¡uncharitable¡¡and¡¡improbable¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡other¡¡was¡¡creditable¡¡to¡¡the¡¡human¡¡race£»¡¡and£»¡¡adopting¡¡it£»¡¡I¡¡took¡¡off¡¡my¡¡cap¡¡to¡¡this¡¡damp¡¡but¡¡cheerful¡¡pair¡¡as¡¡they¡¡went¡¡by¡£¡¡¡¡They¡¡answered¡¡with¡¡a¡¡wave¡¡of¡¡the¡¡hand£»¡¡and¡¡I¡¡stood¡¡looking¡¡after¡¡them¡¡till¡¡they¡¡disappeared¡¡in¡¡the¡¡mist¡£

I¡¡am¡¡inclined¡¡to¡¡think¡¡that¡¡those¡¡young¡¡people£»¡¡if¡¡they¡¡be¡¡still¡¡alive£»¡¡are¡¡happy¡£¡¡¡¡Maybe£»¡¡fortune¡¡has¡¡been¡¡kind¡¡to¡¡them£»¡¡or¡¡maybe¡¡she¡¡has¡¡not£»¡¡but¡¡in¡¡either¡¡event¡¡they¡¡are£»¡¡I¡¡am¡¡inclined¡¡to¡¡think£»¡¡happier¡¡than¡¡are¡¡most¡¡people¡£

Now¡¡and¡¡again£»¡¡the¡¡daily¡¡tornado¡¡would¡¡rage¡¡with¡¡such¡¡fury¡¡as¡¡to¡¡defeat¡¡its¡¡own¡¡purpose¡¡by¡¡prematurely¡¡exhausting¡¡itself¡£¡¡¡¡On¡¡these¡¡rare¡¡occasions¡¡we¡¡would¡¡sit¡¡out¡¡on¡¡the¡¡deck£»¡¡and¡¡enjoy¡¡the¡¡unwonted¡¡luxury¡¡of¡¡fresh¡¡air¡£

I¡¡remember¡¡well¡¡those¡¡few¡¡pleasant¡¡evenings£º¡¡¡¡the¡¡river£»¡¡luminous¡¡with¡¡the¡¡drowned¡¡light£»¡¡the¡¡dark¡¡banks¡¡where¡¡the¡¡night¡¡lurked£»¡¡the¡¡storm¡­tossed¡¡sky£»¡¡jewelled¡¡here¡¡and¡¡there¡¡with¡¡stars¡£

It¡¡was¡¡delightful¡¡not¡¡to¡¡hear¡¡for¡¡an¡¡hour¡¡or¡¡so¡¡the¡¡sullen¡¡thrashing¡¡of¡¡the¡¡rain£»¡¡but¡¡to¡¡listen¡¡to¡¡the¡¡leaping¡¡of¡¡the¡¡fishes£»¡¡the¡¡soft¡¡swirl¡¡raised¡¡by¡¡some¡¡water¡­rat£»¡¡swimming¡¡stealthily¡¡among¡¡the¡¡rushes£»¡¡the¡¡restless¡¡twitterings¡¡of¡¡the¡¡few¡¡still¡¡wakeful¡¡birds¡£

An¡¡old¡¡corncrake¡¡lived¡¡near¡¡to¡¡us£»¡¡and¡¡the¡¡way¡¡he¡¡used¡¡to¡¡disturb¡¡all¡¡the¡¡other¡¡birds£»¡¡and¡¡keep¡¡them¡¡from¡¡going¡¡to¡¡sleep£»¡¡was¡¡shameful¡£¡¡¡¡Amenda£»¡¡who¡¡was¡¡town¡­bred£»¡¡mistook¡¡him¡¡at¡¡first¡¡for¡¡one¡¡of¡¡those¡¡cheap¡¡alarm¡¡clocks£»¡¡and¡¡wondered¡¡who¡¡was¡¡winding¡¡him¡¡up£»¡¡and¡¡why¡¡they¡¡went¡¡on¡¡doing¡¡it¡¡all¡¡night£»¡¡and£»¡¡above¡¡all£»¡¡why¡¡they¡¡didn't¡¡oil¡¡him¡£

He¡¡would¡¡begin¡¡his¡¡unhallowed¡¡performance¡¡about¡¡dusk£»¡¡just¡¡as¡¡every¡¡respectable¡¡bird¡¡was¡¡preparing¡¡to¡¡settle¡¡down¡¡for¡¡the¡¡night¡£¡¡¡¡A¡¡family¡¡of¡¡thrushes¡¡had¡¡their¡¡nest¡¡a¡¡few¡¡yards¡¡from¡¡his¡¡stand£»¡¡and¡¡they¡¡used¡¡to¡¡get¡¡perfectly¡¡furious¡¡with¡¡him¡£

¡¨There's¡¡that¡¡fool¡¡at¡¡it¡¡again£»¡¨¡¡the¡¡female¡¡thrush¡¡would¡¡say£»¡¡¡¨why¡¡can't¡¡he¡¡do¡¡it¡¡in¡¡the¡¡day¡­time¡¡if¡¡he¡¡must¡¡do¡¡it¡¡at¡¡all£¿¡¨¡¡¡¡£¨She¡¡spoke£»¡¡of¡¡course£»¡¡in¡¡twitters£»¡¡but¡¡I¡¡am¡¡confident¡¡the¡¡above¡¡is¡¡a¡¡correct¡¡translation¡££©

After¡¡a¡¡while£»¡¡the¡¡young¡¡thrushes¡¡would¡¡wake¡¡up¡¡and¡¡begin¡¡chirping£»¡¡and¡¡then¡¡the¡¡mother¡¡would¡¡get¡¡madder¡¡than¡¡ever¡£

¡¨Can't¡¡you¡¡say¡¡something¡¡to¡¡him£¿¡¨¡¡she¡¡would¡¡cry¡¡indignantly¡¡to¡¡her¡¡husband¡£¡¡¡¡¡¨How¡¡do¡¡you¡¡think¡¡the¡¡children¡¡can¡¡get¡¡to¡¡sleep£»¡¡poor¡¡things£»¡¡with¡¡that¡¡hideous¡¡row¡¡going¡¡on¡¡all¡¡night£¿¡¡¡¡Might¡¡just¡¡as¡¡well¡¡be¡¡living¡¡in¡¡a¡¡saw¡­mill¡£¡¨

Thus¡¡adjured£»¡¡the¡¡male¡¡thrush¡¡would¡¡put¡¡his¡¡head¡¡over¡¡the¡¡nest£»¡¡and¡¡call¡¡out¡¡in¡¡a¡¡nervous£»¡¡apologetic¡¡manner£º¡­

¡¨I¡¡say£»¡¡you¡¡know£»¡¡you¡¡there£»¡¡I¡¡wish¡¡you¡¡wouldn't¡¡mind¡¡being¡¡quiet¡¡a¡¡bit¡£¡¡¡¡My¡¡wife¡¡says¡¡she¡¡can't¡¡get¡¡the¡¡children¡¡to¡¡sleep¡£¡¡¡¡It's¡¡too¡¡bad£»¡¡you¡¡know£»¡¡'pon¡¡my¡¡word¡¡it¡¡is¡£¡¨

¡¨Gor¡¡on£»¡¨¡¡the¡¡corncrake¡¡would¡¡answer¡¡surlily¡£¡¡¡¡¡¨You¡¡keep¡¡your¡¡wife¡¡herself¡¡quiet£»¡¡that's¡¡enough¡¡for¡¡you¡¡to¡¡do¡£¡¨¡¡¡¡And¡¡on¡¡he¡¡would¡¡go¡¡again¡¡worse¡¡than¡¡before¡£

Then¡¡a¡¡mother¡¡blackbird£»¡¡from¡¡a¡¡little¡¡further¡¡off£»¡¡would¡¡join¡¡in¡¡the¡¡fray¡£

¡¨Ah£»¡¡it's¡¡a¡¡good¡¡hiding¡¡he¡¡wants£»¡¡not¡¡a¡¡talking¡¡to¡£¡¡¡¡And¡¡if¡¡I¡¡was¡¡a¡¡cock£»¡¡I'd¡¡give¡¡it¡¡him¡£¡¨¡¡¡¡£¨This¡¡remark¡¡would¡¡be¡¡made¡¡in¡¡a¡¡tone¡¡of¡¡withering¡¡contempt£»¡¡and¡¡would¡¡appear¡¡to¡¡bear¡¡reference¡¡to¡¡some¡¡previous¡¡discussion¡££©

¡¨You're¡¡quite¡¡right£»¡¡ma'am£»¡¨¡¡Mrs¡£¡¡Thrush¡¡would¡¡reply¡£¡¡¡¡¡¨That's¡¡what¡¡I¡¡tell¡¡my¡¡husband£»¡¡but¡¨¡¡£¨with¡¡rising¡¡inflection£»¡¡so¡¡that¡¡every¡¡lady¡¡in¡¡the¡¡plantation¡¡might¡¡hear£©¡¡¡¨HE¡¡wouldn't¡¡move¡¡himself£»¡¡bless¡¡you¡¡no£»¡¡not¡¡if¡¡I¡¡and¡¡the¡¡children¡¡were¡¡to¡¡die¡¡before¡¡his¡¡eyes¡¡for¡¡want¡¡of¡¡sleep¡£¡¨

¡¨Ah£»¡¡he¡¡ain't¡¡the¡¡only¡¡one£»¡¡my¡¡dear£»¡¨¡¡the¡¡blackbird¡¡would¡¡pipe¡¡back£»¡¡¡¨they're¡¡all¡¡alike¡¨£»¡¡then£»¡¡in¡¡a¡¡voice¡¡more¡¡of¡¡sorrow¡¡than¡¡of¡¡anger£º¡­¡¡¡¨but¡¡there£»¡¡it¡¡ain't¡¡their¡¡fault£»¡¡I¡¡suppose£»¡¡poor¡¡things¡£¡¡¡¡If¡¡you¡¡ain't¡¡got¡¡the¡¡spirit¡¡of¡¡a¡¡bird¡¡you¡¡can't¡¡help¡¡yourself¡£¡¨

I¡¡would¡¡strain¡¡my¡¡ears¡¡at¡¡this¡¡point¡¡to¡¡hear¡¡if¡¡the¡¡male¡¡blackbird¡¡was¡¡moved¡¡at¡¡all¡¡by¡¡these¡¡taunts£»¡¡but¡¡the¡¡only¡¡sound¡¡I¡¡could¡¡ever¡¡detect¡¡coming¡¡from¡¡his¡¡neighbourhood¡¡was¡¡that¡¡of¡¡palpably¡¡exaggerated¡¡snoring¡£

By¡¡this¡¡time¡¡the¡¡whole¡¡glade¡¡would¡¡be¡¡awake£»¡¡expressing¡¡views¡¡concerning¡¡that¡¡corncrake¡¡that¡¡would¡¡have¡¡wounded¡¡a¡¡less¡¡callous¡¡nature¡£

¡¨Blow¡¡me¡¡tight£»¡¡Bill£»¡¨¡¡some¡¡vulgar¡¡l

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