end of the tether-第22节
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ing of a deluge。 The bushes swished loudly alongside；
above there was a series of crackling sounds； with a
sharp rain of small broken branches falling on the
bridge； a creeper with a great rustle snapped on the
head of a boat davit； and a long； luxuriant green twig
actually whipped in and out of the open port； leaving
behind a few torn leaves that remained suddenly at rest
on Mr。 Massy's blanket。 Then； the ship sheering out
in the stream； the light began to return but did not
augment beyond a subdued clearness： for the sun was
very low already； and the river； wending its sinuous
course through a multitude of secular trees as if at the
bottom of a precipitous gorge； had been already in…
vaded by a deepening gloomthe swift precursor of
the night。
〃Oh； no； you don't！〃 murmured the engineer again。
His lips trembled almost imperceptibly； his hands too；
a little： and to calm himself he opened the writing…desk；
spread out a sheet of thin grayish paper covered with
a mass of printed figures and began to scan them at…
tentively for the twentieth time this trip at least。
With his elbows propped； his head between his hands；
he seemed to lose himself in the study of an abstruse
problem in mathematics。 It was the list of the winning
numbers from the last drawing of the great lottery
which had been the one inspiring fact of so many years
of his existence。 The conception of a life deprived of
that periodical sheet of paper had slipped away from
him entirely； as another man； according to his nature；
would not have been able to conceive a world without
fresh air； without activity； or without affection。 A
great pile of flimsy sheets had been growing for years
in his desk； while the Sofala； driven by the faithful
Jack； wore out her boilers in tramping up and down the
Straits； from cape to cape； from river to river； from
bay to bay； accumulating by that hard labor of an
overworked； starved ship the blackened mass of these
documents。 Massy kept them under lock and key like
a treasure。 There was in them； as in the experience
of life； the fascination of hope； the excitement of a half…
penetrated mystery； the longing of a half…satisfied
desire。
For days together； on a trip； he would shut himself
up in his berth with them： the thump of the toiling
engines pulsated in his ear； and he would weary his
brain poring over the rows of disconnected figures； be…
wildering by their senseless sequence； resembling the
hazards of destiny itself。 He nourished a conviction
that there must be some logic lurking somewhere in the
results of chance。 He thought he had seen its very
form。 His head swam； his limbs ached； he puffed at
his pipe mechanically； a contemplative stupor would
soothe the fretfulness of his temper； like the passive
bodily quietude procured by a drug； while the intellect
remains tensely on the stretch。 Nine； nine； aught； four；
two。 He made a note。 The next winning number of
the great prize was forty…seven thousand and five。 These
numbers of course would have to be avoided in the future
when writing to Manilla for the tickets。 He mumbled；
pencil in hand 。 。 。 〃and five。 Hm 。 。 。 hm。〃 He
wetted his finger： the papers rustled。 Ha！ But what's
this？ Three years ago； in the September drawing； it
was number nine； aught； four； two that took the first
prize。 Most remarkable。 There was a hint there of
a definite rule！ He was afraid of missing some recondite
principle in the overwhelming wealth of his material。
What could it be？ and for half an hour he would remain
dead still； bent low over the desk； without twitching a
muscle。 At his back the whole berth would be thick
with a heavy body of smoke； as if a bomb had burst
in there； unnoticed； unheard。
At last he would lock up the desk with the decision of
unshaken confidence； jump and go out。 He would
walk swiftly back and forth on that part of the foredeck
which was kept clear of the lumber and of the bodies of
the native passengers。 They were a great nuisance； but
they were also a source of profit that could not be dis…
dained。 He needed every penny of profit the Sofala
could make。 Little enough it was； in all conscience！
The incertitude of chance gave him no concern； since
he had somehow arrived at the conviction that； in the
course of years； every number was bound to have his
winning turn。 It was simply a matter of time and of
taking as many tickets as he could afford for every
drawing。 He generally took rather more； all the earn…
ings of the ship went that way； and also the wages he
allowed himself as chief engineer。 It was the wages he
paid to others that he begrudged with a reasoned and
at the same time a passionate regret。 He scowled at
the lascars with their deck brooms； at the quarter…
masters rubbing the brass rails with greasy rags； he
was eager to shake his fist and roar abuse in bad Malay
at the poor carpentera timid； sickly； opium…fuddled
Chinaman； in loose blue drawers for all costume； who
invariably dropped his tools and fled below； with stream…
ing tail and shaking all over； before the fury of that
〃devil。〃 But it was when he raised up his eyes to the
bridge where one of these sailor frauds was always
planted by law in charge of his ship that he felt almost
dizzy with rage。 He abominated them all； it was an
old feud； from the time he first went to sea； an un…
licked cub with a great opinion of himself； in the
engine…room。 The slights that had been put upon him。
The persecutions he had suffered at the hands of skip…
persof absolute nobodies in a steamship after all。
And now that he had risen to be a shipowner they were
still a plague to him： he had absolutely to pay away
precious money to the conceited useless loafers：As if
a fully qualified engineerwho was the owner as well
were not fit to be trusted with the whole charge of a
ship。 Well！ he made it pretty warm for them； but it
was a poor consolation。 He had come in time to hate
the ship too for the repairs she required； for the coal…
bills he had to pay； for the poor beggarly freights she
earned。 He would clench his hand as he walked and hit
the rail a sudden blow； viciously； as though she could
be made to feel pain。 And yet he could not do without
er； he needed her； he must hang on to her tooth and
nail to keep his head above water till the expected flood
of fortune came sweeping up and landed him safely on
the high shore of his ambition。
It was now to do nothing； nothing whatever； and have
plenty of money to do it on。 He had tasted of power；
the highest form of it his limited experience was aware
ofthe power of shipowning。 What a deception！
Vanity of vanities！ He wondered at his folly。 He had
thrown away the substance for the shadow。 Of the
gratification of wealth he did not know enough to excite
his imagination with any visions of luxury。 How could
hethe child of a drunken boiler…makergoing
straight from the workshop into the engine…room of a
north…country collier！ But the notion of the absolute
idleness of wealth he could very well conceive。 He
reveled in it； to forget his present troubles； he imagined
himself walking about the streets of Hull （he knew their
gutters well as a boy） with his pockets full of sov…
ereigns。 He would buy himself a house； his married
sisters； their husbands； his old workshop chums； would
render him infinite homage。 There would be nothing
to think of。 His word would be law。 He had been out
of work for a long time before he won his prize； and he
remembered how Carlo Mariani （commonly known as
Paunchy Charley）； the Maltese hotel…keeper at the
slummy end of Denham Street； had cringed joyfully
before him in the evening； when the news had come。
Poor Charley； though he made his living by ministering
to various abject vices； gave credit for their food to
many a piece of white wreckage。 He was naively over…
joyed at the idea of his old bills being paid； and he
reckoned confidently on a spell of festivities in the
cavernous grog…shop downstairs。 Massy remembered
the curious； respectful looks of the 〃trashy〃 white men
in the place。 His heart had swelled within him。 Massy
had left Charley's infamous den directly he had realized
the possibilities open to him； and with his nose in t
