silas marner(织工马南)-第10节
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by feelings stronger even than his resentment。 When he spoke
again it was in a half…conciliatory tone。
“Well； you mean no nonsense about the horse； eh？ You’ll sell
him all fair； and hand over the money？ If you don’t； you know；
everything ’ull go to smash； for I’ve got nothing else to trust to。
And you’ll have less pleasure in pulling the house over my head；
when your own skull’s to be broken too。”
“Ay； ay；” said Dunstan； rising； “all right。 I thought you’d come
round。 I’m the fellow to bring old Bryce up to the scratch。 I’ll get
you a hundred and twenty for him； if I get you a penny。”
“But it’ll perhaps rain cats and dogs tomorrow； as it did
yesterday； and then you can’t go；” said Godfrey； hardly knowing
whether he wished for that obstacle or not。
“Not it；” said Dunstan。 “I’m always lucky in my weather。 It
might rain if you wanted to go yourself。 You never hold trumps；
you know—I always do。 You’ve got the beauty； you see； and I’ve
got the luck； so you must keep me by you for your crooked
sixpence； you’ll ne…ver get along without me。”
“Confound you； hold your tongue！” said Godfrey； impetuously。
“And take care to keep sober tomorrow； else you’ll get pitched on
your head coming home； and Wildfire might be the worse for it。”
“Make your tender heart easy；” said Dunstan； opening the door。
“You never knew me see double when I’d got a bargain to make； it
’ud spoil the fun。 Besides； whenever I fall； I’m warranted to fall on
my legs。”
With that； Dunstan slammed the door behind him； and left
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Godfrey to that bitter rumination on his personal circumstances
which was now unbroken from day today save by the excitement
of sporting； drinking； card…playing； or the rarer and less oblivious
pleasure of seeing Miss Nancy Lammeter。 The subtle and varied
pains springing from the higher sensibility that accompanies
higher culture； are perhaps less pitiable than that dreary absence
of impersonal enjoyment and consolation which leaves ruder
minds to the perpetual urgent companionship of their own griefs
and discontents。 The lives of those rural forefathers； whom we are
apt to think very prosaic figures—men whose only work was to
ride round their land； getting heavier and heavier in their saddles；
and who passed the rest of their days in the half…listless
gratification of senses dulled by monotony—had a certain pathos
in them nevertheless。 Calamities came to them too； and their early
errors carried hard consequences： perhaps the love of some sweet
maiden； the image of purity； order； and calm； had opened their
eyes to the vision of a life in which the days would not seem too
long； even without rioting； but the maiden was lost； and the vision
passed away； and then what was left to them； especially when they
had become too heavy for the hunt； or for carrying a gun over the
furrows； but to drink and get merry； or to drink and get angry； so
that they might be independent of variety； and say over again with
eager emphasis the things they had said already any time that
twelvemonth？ Assuredly； among these flushed and dull…eyed men
there were some whom—thanks to their native human kindness—
even riot could never drive into brutality； men who； when their
cheeks were fresh； had felt the keen point of sorrow or remorse；
had been pierced by the reeds they leaned on； or had lightly put
their limbs in fetters from which no struggle could loose them； and
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Silas Marner 42
under these sad circumstances； common to us all； their thoughts
could find no resting…place outside the ever…trodden round of their
own petty history。
That； at least； was the condition of Godfrey Cass in this six…and…
twentieth year of his life。 A movement of compunction； helped by
those small indefinable influences which every personal relation
exerts on a pliant nature； had urged him into a secret marriage；
which was a blight on his life。 It was an ugly story of low passion；
delusion； and waking from delusion； which needs not to be
dragged from the privacy of Godfrey’s bitter memory。 He had long
known that the delusion was partly due to a trap laid for him by
Dunstan； who saw in his brother’s degrading marriage the means
of gratifying at once his jealous hate and his cupidity。 And if
Godfrey could have felt himself simply a victim； the iron bit that
destiny had put into his mouth would have chafed him less
intolerably。 If the curses he muttered half aloud when he was
alone had had no other object than Dunstan’s diabolical cunning；
he might have shrunk less from the consequences of avowal。 But
he had something else to curse—his own vicious folly； which now
seemed as mad and unaccountable to him as almost all our follies
and vices do when their promptings have long passed away。 For
four years he had thought of Nancy Lammeter； and wooed her
with tacit； patient worship； as the woman who made him think of
the future with joy： she would be his wife； and would make home
lovely to him； as his father’s home had never been； and it would be
easy； when she was always near； to shake off those foolish habits
that were no pleasures； but only a feverish way of annulling
vacancy。 Godfrey’s was an essentially domestic nature； bred up in
a home where the hearth had no smiles； and where the daily
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Silas Marner 43
habits were not chastised by the presence of household order。 His
easy disposition made him fall in unresistingly with the family
courses； but the need of some tender； permanent affection； the
longing for some influence that would make the good he preferred
easy to pursue； caused the neatness； purity； and liberal orderliness
of the Lammeter household； sunned by the smile of Nancy； to
seem like those fresh bright hours of the morning when
temptations go to sleep and leave the ear open to the voice of the
good angel； inviting to industry； sobriety； and peace。 And yet the
hope of this paradise had not been enough to save him from a
course which shut him out of it forever。 Instead of keeping fast
hold of the strong silken rope by which Nancy would have drawn
him safe to the green banks where it was easy to step firmly； he
had let himself be dragged back into mud and slime； in which it
was useless to struggle。 He had made ties for himself which
robbed him of all wholesome motive and were a constant
exasperation。
Still； there was one position worse than the present： it was the
position he would be in when the ugly secret was disclosed； and
the desire that continually triumphed over every other was that of
warding off the evil day； when he would have to bear the
consequences of his father’s violent resentment for the wound
inflicted on his family pride—would have； perhaps； to turn his
back on that hereditary ease and dignity which； after all； was a
sort of reason for living； and would carry with him the certainty
that he was banished forever from the sight and esteem of Nancy
Lammeter。 The longer the interval； the more chance there was of
deliverance from some； at least； of the hateful consequences to
which he had sold himself； the more opportunities remained for
George Eliot
