idle ideas in 1905-第23节

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tiresome　than　being　a　millionaire；　and　that　is　trying　to　be　a
millionaire。　　But；　meanwhile；　the　world　has　got　its　work　done。

The　American　professor　fears　that　the　artistic　development　of　America
leaves　much　to　be　desired。　　I　fear　the　artistic　development　of　most
countries　leaves　much　to　be　desired。　　Why　the　Athenians　themselves
sandwiched　their　drama　between　wrestling　competitions　and　boxing
bouts。　　The　plays　of　Sophocles；　or　Euripides；　were　given　as　〃side
shows。〃　　The　chief　items　of　the　fair　were　the　games　and　races。
Besides；　America　is　still　a　young　man。　　It　has　been　busy　〃getting　on
in　the　world。〃　　It　has　not　yet　quite　finished。　　Yet　there　are　signs
that　young　America　is　approaching　the　thirty…nines。　　He　is　finding　a
little　time；　a　little　money　to　spare　for　art。　　One　can　almost　hear
young　Americanot　quite　so　young　as　he　wassaying　to　Mrs。　Europe　as
he　enters　and　closes　the　shop　door：

〃Well；　ma'am；　here　I　am；　and　maybe　you'll　be　glad　to　hear　I've　a
little　money　to　spend。　　Yes；　ma'am；　I've　fixed　things　all　right
across　the　water；　we　shan't　starve。　　So　now；　ma'am；　you　and　I　can
have　a　chat　concerning　this　art　I've　been　hearing　so　much　about。
Let's　have　a　look　at　it；　ma'am；　trot　it　out；　and　don't　you　be　afraid
of　putting　a　fair　price　upon　it。〃

I　am　inclined　to　think　that　Mrs。　Europe　has　not　hesitated　to　put　a
good　price　upon　the　art　she　has　sold　to　Uncle　Sam。　　I　am　afraid　Mrs。
Europe　has　occasionally　〃unloaded〃　on　Uncle　Sam。　　I　talked　to　a
certain　dealer　one　afternoon；　now　many　years　ago；　at　the　Uwantit
Club。

〃What　is　the　next　picture　likely　to　be　missing？〃　I　asked　him　in　the
course　of　general　conversation。

〃Thome　little　thing　of　Hoppner'th；　if　it　mutht　be；〃　he　replied　with
confidence。

〃Hoppner；〃　I　murmured；　〃I　seem　to　have　heard　the　name。〃

〃Yeth；　you'll　hear　it　a　bit　oftener　during　the　next　eighteen　month　or
tho。　　You　take　care　you　don't　get　tired　of　hearing　it；　thath　all；〃　he
laughed。　　〃Yeth；〃　he　continued；　thoughtfully；　〃Reynoldth　ith　played
out。　　Nothing　much　to　be　made　of　Gainthborough；　either。　　Dealing　in
that　lot　now；　why；　it'th　like　keeping　a　potht　offith。　　Hoppner'th　the
coming　man。〃

〃You've　been　buying　Hoppners　up　cheap；〃　I　suggested。

〃Between　uth；〃　he　answered；　〃yeth；　I　think　we've　got　them　all。　　Maybe
a　few　more。　　I　don't　think　we've　mithed　any。〃

〃You　will　sell　them　for　more　than　you　gave　for　them；〃　I　hinted。

〃You're　thmart；〃　he　answered；　regarding　me　admiringly；　〃you　thee
through　everything　you　do。〃

〃How　do　you　work　it？〃　I　asked　him。　　There　is　a　time　in　the　day　when
he　is　confidential。　　〃Here　is　this　man；　Hoppner。　　I　take　it　that　you
have　bought　him　up　at　an　average　of　a　hundred　pounds　a　picture；　and
that　at　that　price　most　owners　were　fairly　glad　to　sell。　　Few　folks
outside　the　art　schools　have　ever　heard　of　him。　　I　bet　that　at　the
present　moment　there　isn't　one　art　critic　who　could　spell　his　name
without　reference　to　a　dictionary。　　In　eighteen　months　you　will　be
selling　him　for　anything　from　one　thousand　to　ten　thousand　pounds。
How　is　it　done？〃

〃How　ith　everything　done　that'th　done　well？〃　he　answered。　　〃By
earnetht　effort。〃　　He　hitched　his　chair　nearer　to　me；　〃I　get　a　chap
one　of　your　thort　of　chapthhe　writ'th　an　article　about　Hoppner。　　I
get　another　to　anthwer　him。　　Before　I've　done　there'll　be　a　hundred
articleth　about　Hoppnerhith　life；　hith　early　thruggie；　anecdo'th
about　hith　wife。　　Then　a　Hoppner　will　be　thold　at　public　auchtion　for
a　thouthand　guineath。〃

〃But　how　can　you　be　certain　it　will　fetch　a　thousand　guineas？〃　I
interrupted。

〃I　happen　to　know　the　man　whoth　going　to　buy　it。〃　　He　winked；　and　I
understood。

〃A　fortnight　later　there　will　be　a　thale　of　half…a…dothen；　and　the
prithe　will　be　gone　up　by　that　time。〃

〃And　after　that？〃　I　said。

〃After　that；〃　he　replied；　rising；　〃the　American　millionaire！　　He'll
jutht　be　waiting　on　the　door…thtep　for　the　thale…room　to　open。〃

〃If　by　any　chance　I　come　across　a　Hoppner？〃　I　said；　laughing；　as　I
turned　to　go。

〃Don't　you　hold　on　to　it　too　long；　that'th　all；〃　was　his　advice。



HOW　MANY　CHARMS　HATH　MUSIC；　WOULD　YOU　SAY？



The　argument　of　the　late　Herr　Wagner　was　that　grand　operathe　music
drama；　as　he　called　itincluded；　and　therefore　did　away　with　the
necessity　forall　other　arts。　　Music　in　all　its　branches；　of　course；
it　provides：　　so　much　I　will　concede　to　the　late　Herr　Wagner。　　There
are　times；　I　confess；　when　my　musical　yearnings　might　shock　the　late
Herr　Wagnertimes　when　I　feel　unequal　to　following　three　distinct
themes　at　one　and　the　same　instant。

〃Listen；〃　whispers　the　Wagnerian　enthusiast　to　me；　〃the　cornet　has
now　the　Brunnhilda　motive。〃　　It　seems　to　me；　in　my　then　state　of
depravity；　as　if　the　cornet　had　even　more　than　this　the　matter　with
him。

〃The　second　violins；〃　continues　the　Wagnerian　enthusiast；　〃are
carrying　on　the　Wotan　theme。〃　　That　they　are　carrying　on　goes　without
saying：　　the　players'　faces　are　streaming　with　perspiration。

〃The　brass；〃　explains　my　friendhis　object　is　to　cultivate　my　ear
〃is　accompanying　the　singers。〃　　I　should　have　said　drowning　them。
There　are　occasions　when　I　can　rave　about　Wagner　with　the　best　of
them。　　High　class　moods　come　to　all　of　us。　　The　difference　between
the　really　high…class　man　and　us　commonplace；　workaday　men　is　the
difference　between；　say；　the　eagle　and　the　barnyard　chicken。　　I　am
the　barnyard　chicken。　　I　have　my　wings。　　There　are　ecstatic　moments
when　I　feel　I　want　to　spurn　the　sordid　earth　and　soar　into　the　realms
of　art。　　I　do　fly　a　little；　but　my　body　is　heavy；　and　I　only　get　as
far　as　the　fence。　　After　a　while　I　find　it　lonesome　on　the　fence；　and
I　hop　down　again　among　my　fellows。

Listening　to　Wagner；　during　such　temporary　Philistinic　mood；　my　sense
of　fair　play　is　outraged。　　A　lone；　lorn　woman　stands　upon　the　stage
trying　to　make　herself　heard。　　She　has　to　do　this　sort　of　thing　for
her　living；　maybe　an　invalid　mother；　younger　brothers　and　sisters　are
dependent　upon　her。　　One　hundred　and　forty　men；　all　armed　with
powerful　instruments；　well…organised；　and　most　of　them　looking　well…
fed；　combine　to　make　it　impossible　for　a　single　note　of　that　poor
woman's　voice　to　be　heard　above　their　din。　　I　see　her　standing　there；
opening　and　shutting　her　mouth；　getting　redder　and　redder　in　the
face。　　She　is　singing；　one　feels　sure　of　it；　one　could　hear　her　if
only　those　one　hundred　and　forty　men　would　ease　up　for　a　minute。　　She
makes　one　mighty；　supreme　effort；　above　the　banging　of　the　drums；　the
blare　of　the　trumpets；　the　shrieking　of　the　strings；　that　last
despairing　note　is　distinctly　heard。

She　has　won；　but　the　victory　has　cost　her　dear。　　She　sinks　down
fainting　on　the　stage　and　is　carried　off　by　supers。　　Chivalrous
indignation　has　made　it　difficult　for　me　to　keep　my　seat　watching　the
unequal　contest。　　My　instinct　was　to　leap　the　barrier；　hurl　the　bald…
headed　chief　of　her　enemies　from　his　high　chair；　and　lay　about　me
with　the　trombone　or　the　clarionetwhichever　might　have　come　the
easier　to　my　snatch。

〃You　cowardly　lot　of　bullies；〃　I　have　wanted　to　cry；　〃are　you　not
ashamed　of　yourselves？　　A　hundred　and　forty　of　you　against　one；　and
that　one　a　still　beautiful　and；　comparatively　speaking；　young　lady。
Be　quiet　for　a　minutecan't　you？　　Give　the　poor　girl　a　chance。〃

A　lady　of　my　acquaintance　says　that　sitting　out　a　Wagnerian　opera
seems　to　her　like　listening　to　a　singer　accompanied　by　four
orchestras　playing　different　tunes　at　the　same　time。　　As　I　have　said；
there　are　times　when　Wagner　carries　me　along　with　him；　when　I　exult
in　the　crash　and　whirl　of　his　contending　harmonies。　　But；　alas！　there
are　those　other　moodsthose　after　dinner　moodswhen　my　desire　is
for　something　distinctly　resembling　a　tune。　　Still；　there　are　other
composers　of　grand　opera　besides　Wagner。　　I　grant　to　the　late　Herr
Wagner；　that；　in　so　far　as　music　is　concerned；　opera　can　supply　us
with　all　we　can　need。

But　it　was　also　Wagner's　argument　that　grand　opera　could　supply　us
with　acting；　and　there　I　am　compelled　to　disagree　with　him。　　Wagner
thought　that　the　arts　of　acting　and　singing　could　be　combined。　　I
have　seen　artists　the　great　man　has　trained　himself。　　As　singers　they
left　nothing　to　be　desired；　but　the　acting　in　grand　opera　has　never
yet　impressed　me。　　Wagner　never　succeeded　in　avoiding　the　operatic
convention　and　nobody　else　ever　will。　　When　the　operatic　lover　meets
his　sweetheart　he　puts　her　in　a　corner　and；　turning　his　back　upon
her；　comes　down　to　the　footlights　and　tells　the　audience　how　he
adores　her。　　When　he　has　finished；　he；　in　his　turn；　retires　into　the
corner；　and　she　comes　down　and　tells　the　audience　that　she　is　simply
mad　about　him。

Overcome　with　joy　at　finding　she　really　cares　for　him；　he　comes　down
right　and　says　that　this　is　the　happiest　moment　of　his　life；　and　she
stands　left；　twelve　feet　away　from　him；　and　has　the　presentiment　that
all　this　sort　of　thing　is　much　too　good　to　last。　　They　go　off
together；　backwards；　side　by　side。　　If　there　is　any　love…making；　such
as　I　understand　by　the　term；　it　is　done　〃off。〃　　This　is　not　my　idea
of　acting。　　But　I　do　not　see　how　you　are　going　to　substitute　for　it
anything　more　natural。　　When　you　are　singing　at　th