the golden age(金色时代)-第29节
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was the life and soul of the party； and if his gaiety struck one at times as
being a trifle overdone； it was not a moment to be critical。 As we
tramped along； I promised him I would ask Farmer Larkin not to kill any
more pigs till he came back for the holidays； and he said he would send
me a proper catapult；the real lethal article； not a kid's plaything。 Then
suddenly； when we were about half…way down； one of the girls fell a…
snivelling。
The happy few who dare to laugh at the woes of sea…sickness will
perhaps remember how； on occasion； the sudden collapse of a fellow…
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voyager before their very eyes has caused them hastily to revise their self…
confidence and resolve to walk more humbly for the future。 Even so it
was with Edward； who turned his head aside； feigning an interest in the
landscape。 It was but for a moment； then he recollected the hat he was
wearing；a hard bowler； the first of that sort he had ever owned。 He took
it off； examined it； and felt it over。 Something about it seemed to give
him strength； and he was a man once more。
At the station； Edward's first care was to dispose his boxes on the
platform so that every one might see the labels and the lettering thereon。
One did not go to school for the first time every day！ Then he read both
sides of his ticket carefully； shifted it to every one of his pockets in turn；
and finally fell to chinking of his money； to keep his courage up。 We
were all dry of conversation by this time； and could only stand round and
stare in silence at the victim decked for the altar。 And； as I looked at
Edward； in new clothes of a manly cut； with a hard hat upon his head； a
railway ticket in one pocket and money of his own in the other；money to
spend as he liked and no questions asked！I began to feel dimly how great
was the gulf already yawning betwixt us。 Fortunately I was not old
enough to realise； further； that here on this little platform the old order lay
at its last gasp； and that Edward might come back to us； but it would not
be the Edward of yore； nor could things ever be the same again。
When the train steamed up at last； we all boarded it impetuously with
the view of selecting the one peerless carriage to which Edward might be
intrusted with the greatest comfort and honour； and as each one found the
ideal compartment at the same moment； and vociferously maintained its
merits； he stood some chance for a time of being left behind。 A porter
settled the matter by heaving him through the nearest door； and as the train
moved off； Edward's head was thrust out of the window； wearing on it an
unmistakable first…quality grin that he had been saving up somewhere for
the supreme moment。 Very small and white his face looked； on the long
side of the retreating train。 But the grin was visible； undeniable； stoutly
maintained； till a curve swept him from our sight； and he was borne away
in the dying rumble； out of our placid backwater； out into the busy world
of rubs and knocks and competition； out into the New Life。
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When a crab has lost a leg； his gait is still more awkward than his wont；
till Time and healing Nature make him totus teres atque rotundus once
more。 We straggled back from the station disjointedly； Harold； who was
very silent； sticking close to me； his last slender props while the girls in
front； their heads together； were already reckoning up the weeks to the
holidays。 Home at last； Harold suggested one or two occupations of a
spicy and contraband flavour； but though we did our manful best there was
no knocking any interest out of them。 Then I suggested others； with the
same want of success。 Finally we found ourselves sitting silent on an
upturned wheelbarrow； our chins on our fists； staring haggardly into the
raw new conditions of our changed life； the ruins of a past behind our
backs。
And all the while Selina and Charlotte were busy stuffing Edward's
rabbits with unwonted forage； bilious and green； polishing up the cage of
his mice till the occupants raved and swore like householders in spring…
time； and collecting materials for new bows and arrows； whips； boats；
guns； and four… in…hand harness； against the return of Ulysses。 Little did
they dream that the hero； once back from Troy and all its onsets； would
scornfully condemn their clumsy but laborious armoury as rot and humbug
and only fit for kids！ This； with many another like awakening； was
mercifully hidden from them。 Could the veil have been lifted； and the
girls permitted to see Edward as he would appear a short three months
hence； ragged of attire and lawless of tongue； a scorner of tradition and an
adept in strange new physical tortures； one who would in the same half…
hour dismember a doll and shatter a hallowed belief；in fine； a sort of
swaggering Captain； fresh from the Spanish Main；could they have had
the least hint of this； well； then perhaps。 But which of us is of mental
fibre to stand the test of a glimpse into futurity？ Let us only hope that；
even with certain disillusionment ahead； the girls would have acted
precisely as they did。
And perhaps we have reason to be very grateful that； both as children
and long afterwards； we are never allowed to guess how the absorbing
pursuit of the moment will appear； not only to others； but to ourselves； a
very short time hence。 So we pass； with a gusto and a heartiness that to
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an onlooker would seem almost pathetic； from one droll devotion to
another misshapen passion； and who shall care to play Rhadamanthus； to
appraise the record； and to decide how much of it is solid achievement；
and how much the merest child's play？
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