letters of two brides-第9节
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its tropical love； its fiery poetryinto this its last offshoot； if
the seed was never to burst its rugged shell； if no stem was to spring
forth； no radiant flower scatter aloft its Eastern perfumes？ Of what
crime have I been guilty before my birth that I can inspire no love？
Did fate from my very infancy decree that I should be stranded； a
useless hulk； on some barren shore！ I find in my soul the image of the
deserts where my fathers ranged； illumined by a scorching sun which
shrivels up all life。 Proud remnant of a fallen race； vain force； love
run to waste； an old man in the prime of youth； here better than
elsewhere shall I await the last grace of death。 Alas！ under this
murky sky no spark will kindle these ashes again to flame。 Thus my
last words may be those of Christ； /My God； Thou hast forsaken me！/
Cry of agony and terror； to the core of which no mortal has ventured
yet to penetrate！
You can realize now； Fernand； what a joy it is to me to live afresh in
you and Marie。 I shall watch you henceforth with the pride of a
creator satisfied in his work。 Love each other well and go on loving
if you would not give me pain； any discord between you would hurt me
more than it would yourselves。
Our mother had a presentiment that events would one day serve her
wishes。 It may be that the longing of a mother constitutes a pact
between herself and God。 Was she not； moreover； one of those
mysterious beings who can hold converse with Heaven and bring back
thence a vision of the future？ How often have I not read in the lines
of her forehead that she was coveting for Fernand the honors and the
wealth of Felipe！ When I said so to her； she would reply with tears；
laying bare the wounds of a heart； which of right was the undivided
property of both her sons； but which an irresistible passion gave to
you alone。
Her spirit； therefore； will hover joyfully above your heads as you bow
them at the altar。 My mother； have you not a caress for your Felipe
now that he has yielded to your favorite even the girl whom you
regretfully thrust into his arms？ What I have done is pleasing to our
womankind； to the dead； and to the King； it is the will of God。 Make
no difficulty then； Fernand； obey； and be silent。
/P。 S。/ Tell Urraca to be sure and call me nothing but M。 Henarez。
Don't say a word about me to Marie。 You must be the one living soul to
know the secrets of the last Christianized Moor； in whose veins runs
the blood of a great family； which took its rise in the desert and is
now about to die out in the person of a solitary exile。
Farewell。
VII
LOUISE DE CHAULIEU TO RENEE DE MAUCOMBE
WHAT！ To be married so soon。 But this is unheard of。 At the end of a
month you become engaged to a man who is a stranger to you； and about
whom you know nothing。 The man may be deafthere are so many kinds of
deafness！he may be sickly； tiresome； insufferable！
Don't you see； Renee； what they want with you？ You are needful for
carrying on the glorious stock of the l'Estorades； that is all。 You
will be buried in the provinces。 Are these the promises we made each
other？ Were I you； I would sooner set off to the Hyeres islands in a
caique； on the chance of being captured by an Algerian corsair and
sold to the Grand Turk。 Then I should be a Sultana some day； and
wouldn't I make a stir in the harem while I was youngyes； and
afterwards too！
You are leaving one convent to enter another。 I know you； you are a
coward； and you will submit to the yoke of family life with a lamblike
docility。 But I am here to direct you； you must come to Paris。 There
we shall drive the men wild and hold a court like queens。 Your
husband； sweetheart； in three years from now may become a member of
the Chamber。 I know all about members now； and I will explain it to
you。 You will work that machine very well； you can live in Paris； and
become there what my mother calls a woman of fashion。 Oh！ you needn't
suppose I will leave you in your grange！
Monday。
For a whole fortnight now； my dear； I have been living the life of
society； one evening at the Italiens； another at the Grand Opera； and
always a ball afterwards。 Ah！ society is a witching world。 The music
of the Opera enchants me； and whilst my soul is plunged in divine
pleasure； I am the centre of admiration and the focus of all the
opera…glasses。 But a single glance will make the boldest youth drop
his eyes。
I have seen some charming young men there； all the same； I don't care
for any of them； not one has roused in me the emotion which I feel
when I listen to Garcia in his splendid duet with Pellegrini in
/Otello/。 Heavens！ how jealous Rossini must have been to express
jealousy so well！ What a cry in 〃Il mio cor si divide！〃 I'm speaking
Greek to you； for you never heard Garcia； but then you know how
jealous I am！
What a wretched dramatist Shakespeare is！ Othello is in love with
glory； he wins battles； he gives orders； he struts about and is all
over the place while Desdemona sits at home； and Desdemona； who sees
herself neglected for the silly fuss of public life； is quite meek all
the time。 Such a sheep deserves to be slaughtered。 Let the man whom I
deign to love beware how he thinks of anything but loving me！
For my part； I like those long trials of the old…fashioned chivalry。
That lout of a young lord； who took offence because his sovereign…lady
sent him down among the lions to fetch her glove； was； in my opinion；
very impertinent； and a fool too。 Doubtless the lady had in reserve
for him some exquisite flower of love； which he lost； as he well
deservedthe puppy！
But here am I running on as though I had not a great piece of news to
tell you。 My father is certainly going to represent our master the
King at Madrid。 I say /our/ master； for I shall make part of the
embassy。 My mother wishes to remain here； and my father will take me
so as to have some woman with him。
My dear； this seems to you； no doubt； very simple； but there are
horrors behind it； all the same： in a fortnight I have probed the
secrets of the house。 My mother would accompany my father to Madrid if
he would take M。 de Canalis as a secretary to the embassy。 But the
King appoints the secretaries； the Duke dare neither annoy the King；
who hates to be opposed； nor vex my mother； and the wily diplomat
believes he has cut the knot by leaving the Duchess here。 M。 de
Canalis； who is the great poet of the day； is the young man who
cultivates my mother's society； and who no doubt studies diplomacy
with her from three o'clock to five。 Diplomacy must be a fine subject；
for he is as regular as a gambler on the Stock Exchange。
The Duc de Rhetore； our elder brother； solemn； cold； and whimsical；
would be extinguished by his father at Madrid； therefore he remains in
Paris。 Miss Griffith has found out also that Alphonse is in love with
a ballet…girl at the Opera。 How is it possible to fall in love with
legs and pirouettes？ We have noticed that my brother comes to the
theatre only when Tullia dances there； he applauds the steps of this
creature； and then goes out。 Two ballet…girls in a family are； I
fancy； more destructive than the plague。 My second brother is with his
regiment； and I have not yet seen him。 Thus it comes about that I have
to act as the Antigone of His Majesty's ambassador。 Perhaps I may get
married in Spain； and perhaps my father's idea is a marriage there
without dowry； after the pattern of yours with this broken…down guard
of honor。 My father asked if I would go with him； and offered me the
use of his Spanish master。
〃Spain； the country for castles in the air！〃 I cried。 〃Perhaps you
hope that it may mean marriages for me！〃
For sole reply he honored me with a meaning look。 For some days he has
amused himself with teasing me at lunch； he watches me； and I
dissemble。 In this way I have played with him cruelly as father and
ambassador /in petto/。 Hadn't he taken me for a fool？ He asked me what
I thought of this and that young man； and of some girls whom I had met
in several houses。 I replied with quite inane remarks on the color of
their hair； their faces； and the difference in their figures。 My
father seemed disappointed at my crassness； and inwardly blamed
himself for having asked me。
〃Still； father；〃 I added； 〃don't suppose I am saying what I really
think： mother made me afraid the other day that I had spoken more
frankly than I ought of my impressions。〃
〃With your family you can speak quite freely；〃 my mother replied。
〃Very well； then；〃 I went on。 〃The young men I have met so far strike
me as too self…centered to excite interest in others； they are much
more taken up with themselves than with their company。 They can't be
accused of lack of candor at any rate。 They put on a certain
expression to talk to us； and drop it again in a moment； apparently
satisfied that we don't use our eyes。 The man as he converses is the
lover； silent； he is the husband。 The girls； again； are so artificial
that it is impossible to know what they really are； except from the
way they dance； their figures and movements alone are not a sham。 But
what has alarmed me most in this fashionable society is its brutality。
The little incidents whi
