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第43节

letters of two brides-第43节

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her moods also of dreamy melancholy。 These rare gifts go with a proud
aristocratic bearing; she has a fine presence。

She belongs to one of those old families who make a fetich of rank;
yet loves me enough to ignore the misfortune of my birth。 Our secret
passion is now of long standing; we have made trial; each of the
other; and find that in the matter of jealousy we are twin spirits;
our thoughts are the reverberation of the same thunderclap。 We both
love for the first time; and this bewitching springtime has filled its
days for us with all the images of delight that fancy can paint in
laughing; sweet; or musing mood。 Our path has been strewn with the
flowers of tender imaginings。 Each hour brought its own wealth; and
when we parted; it was to put our thoughts in verse。 Not for a moment
did I harbor the idea of sullying the brightness of such a time by
giving the rein to sensual passion; however it might chafe within。 She
was a widow and free; intuitively; she realized all the homage implied
in this constant self…restraint; which often moved her to tears。 Can
you not read in this; my friend; a soul of noble temper? In mutual
fear we shunned even the first kiss of love。

〃We have each a wrong to reproach ourselves with;〃 she said one day。

〃Where is yours?〃 I asked。

〃My marriage;〃 was her reply。

Daniel; you are a giant among us and you love one of the most gifted
women of the aristocracy; which has produced my Armande; what need to
tell you more? Such an answer lays bare to you a woman's heart and all
the happiness which is in store for your friend;
MARIE GASTON。



L

MME。 DE L'ESTORADE TO MME。 DE MACUMER

Louise; can it be that; with all your knowledge of the deep…seated
mischief wrought by the indulgence of passion; even within the heart
of marriage; you are planning a life of wedded solitude? Having
sacrificed your first husband in the course of a fashionable career;
would you now fly to the desert to consume a second? What stores of
misery you are laying up for yourself!

But I see from the way you have set about it that there is no going
back。 The man who has overcome your aversion to a second marriage must
indeed possess some magic of mind and heart; and you can only be left
to your illusions。 But have you forgotten your former criticism on
young men? Not one; you would say; but has visited haunts of shame;
and has besmirched his purity with the filth of the streets。 Where is
the change; prayin them or in you?

You are a lucky woman to be able to believe in happiness。 I have not
the courage to blame you for it; though the instinct of affection
urges me to dissuade you from this marriage。 Yes; a thousand times;
yes; it is true that nature and society are at one in making war on
absolute happiness; because such a condition is opposed to the laws of
both; possibly; also; because Heaven is jealous of its privileges。 My
love for you forebodes some disaster to which all my penetration can
give no definite form。 I know neither whence nor from whom it will
arise; but one need be no prophet to foretell that the mere weight of
a boundless happiness will overpower you。 Excess of joy is harder to
bear than any amount of sorrow。

Against him I have not a word to say。 You love him; and in all
probability I have never seen him; but some idle day I hope you will
send me a sketch; however slight; of this rare; fine animal。

If you see me so resigned and cheerful; it is because I am convinced
that; once the honeymoon is over you will both with one accord; fall
back into the common track。 Some day; two years hence; when we are
walking along this famous road; you will exclaim; 〃Why; there is the
chalet which was to be my home for ever!〃 And you will laugh your dear
old laugh; which shows all your pretty teeth!

I have said nothing yet to Louis; it would be too good an opening for
his ridicule。 I shall tell him simply that you are going to be
married; and that you wish it kept secret。 Unluckily; you need neither
mother nor sister for your bridal evening。 We are in October now; like
a brave woman; you are grappling with winter first。 If it were not a
question of marriage; I should say you were taking the bull by the
horns。 In any case; you will have in me the most discreet and
intelligent of friends。 That mysterious region; known as the centre of
Africa; has swallowed up many travelers; and you seem to me to be
launching on an expedition which; in the domain of sentiment;
corresponds to those where so many explorers have perished; whether in
the sands or at the hands of natives。 Your desert is; happily; only
two leagues from Paris; so I can wish you quite cheerfully; 〃A safe
journey and speedy return。〃



LI

THE COMTESSE DE L'ESTORADE TO MME。 MARIE GASTON
1835。

What has come to you; my dear? After a silence of two years; surely
Renee has a right to feel anxious about Louise。 So this is love! It
brushes aside and scatters to the winds a friendship such as ours! You
must admit that; devoted as I am to my childrenmore even perhaps
than you to your Gastona mother's love has something expansive about
it which does not allow it to steal from other affections; or
interfere with the claims of friendship。 I miss your letters; I long
for a sight of your dear; sweet face。 Oh! Louise; my heart has only
conjecture to feed upon!

As regards ourselves; I will try and tell you everything as briefly as
possible。

On reading your last letter but one; I find some stinging comments on
our political situation。 You mocked at us for keeping the post in the
Audit Department; which; as well as the title of Count; Louis owed to
the favor of Charles X。 But I should like to know; please; how it
would be possible out of an income of forty thousand livres; thirty
thousand of which go with the entail; to give a suitable start in life
to Athenais and my poor little beggar Rene。 Was it not a duty to live
on our salary and prudently allow the income of the estate to
accumulate? In this way we shall; in twenty years; have put together
about six hundred thousand francs; which will provide portions for my
daughter and for Rene; whom I destine for the navy。 The poor little
chap will have an income of ten thousand livres; and perhaps we may
contrive to leave him in cash enough to bring his portion up to the
amount of his sister's。

When he is Captain; my beggar will be able to make a wealthy marriage;
and take a position in society as good as his elder brother's。

These considerations of prudence determined the acceptance in our
family of the new order of things。 The new dynasty; as was natural;
raised Louis to the Peerage and made him a grand officer of the Legion
of Honor。 The oath once taken; l'Estorade could not be half…hearted in
his services; and he has since then made himself very useful in the
Chamber。 The position he has now attained is one in which he can rest
upon his oars till the end of his days。 He has a good deal of
adroitness in business matters; and though he can hardly be called an
orator; speaks pleasantly and fluently; which is all that is necessary
in politics。 His shrewdness and the extent of his information in all
matters of government and administration are fully appreciated; and
all parties consider him indispensable。 I may tell you that he was
recently offered an embassy; but I would not let him accept it。 I am
tied to Paris by the education of Armand and Athenaiswho are now
respectively thirteen and nearly elevenand I don't intend leaving
till little Rene has completed his; which is just beginning。

We could not have remained faithful to the elder branch of the dynasty
and returned to our country life without allowing the education and
prospects of the three children to suffer。 A mother; my sweet; is
hardly called on to be a Decius; especially at a time when the type is
rare。 In fifteen years from now; l'Estorade will be able to retire to
La Crampade on a good pension; having found a place as referendary for
Armand in the Audit Department。

As for Rene; the navy will doubtless make a diplomatist of him。 The
little rogue; at seven years old; has all the cunning of an old
Cardinal。

Oh! Louise; I am indeed a happy mother。 My children are an endless
source of joy to me。

  Senza brama sicura ricchezza。

Armand is a day scholar at Henry IV。's school。 I made up my mind he
should have a public…school training; yet could not reconcile myself
to the thought of parting with him; so I compromised; as the Duc
d'Orleans did before he becameor in order that he might become
Louis Philippe。 Every morning Lucas; the old servant whom you will
remember; takes Armand to school in time for the first lesson; and
brings him home again at half…past four。 In the house we have a
private tutor; an admirable scholar; who helps Armand with his work in
the evenings; and calls him in the morning at the school hour。 Lucas
takes him some lunch during the play hour at midday。 In this way I am
with my boy at dinner and until he goes to bed at night; and I see him
off in the morning。

Armand is the same charming little fellow; full of feeling and
unselfish impulse; whom you loved; and his tutor is quite pleased with
him。

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