part 6-第17节
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to be legally dead。〃
〃Don't let us talk about Fred's wife； please。 He had no
business to get into such a mess； and he had no business to
stay in it。 He's always been a softy where women were
concerned。〃
〃Most of us are； I'm afraid；〃 Dr。 Archie admitted
meekly。
〃Too much light in here； isn't there？ Tires one's eyes。
The stage lights are hard on mine。〃 Thea began turning
them out。 〃We'll leave the little one； over the piano。〃
She sank down by Archie on the deep sofa。 〃We two have
so much to talk about that we keep away from it altogether；
have you noticed？ We don't even nibble the edges。 I wish
we had Landry here to…night to play for us。 He's very
comforting。〃
〃I'm afraid you don't have enough personal life； outside
your work； Thea。〃 The doctor looked at her anxiously。
She smiled at him with her eyes half closed。 〃My dear
doctor； I don't have any。 Your work becomes your per…
sonal life。 You are not much good until it does。 It's like
being woven into a big web。 You can't pull away； because
all your little tendrils are woven into the picture。 It takes
you up； and uses you； and spins you out； and that is your
life。 Not much else can happen to you。〃
〃Didn't you think of marrying； several years ago？〃
〃You mean Nordquist？ Yes； but I changed my mind。
We had been singing a good deal together。 He's a splendid
creature。〃
〃Were you much in love with him； Thea？〃 the doctor
asked hopefully。
She smiled again。 〃I don't think I know just what that
expression means。 I've never been able to find out。 I
think I was in love with you when I was little； but not
with any one since then。 There are a great many ways of
caring for people。 It's not； after all； a simple state； like
measles or tonsilitis。 Nordquist is a taking sort of man。
He and I were out in a rowboat once in a terrible storm。
The lake was fed by glaciers；ice water；and we
couldn't have swum a stroke if the boat had filled。 If we
hadn't both been strong and kept our heads； we'd have
gone down。 We pulled for every ounce there was in us；
and we just got off with our lives。 We were always being
thrown together like that； under some kind of pressure。
Yes； for a while I thought he would make everything
right。〃 She paused and sank back； resting her head on a
cushion； pressing her eyelids down with her fingers。 〃You
see；〃 she went on abruptly； 〃he had a wife and two chil…
dren。 He hadn't lived with her for several years； but
when she heard that he wanted to marry again； she began
to make trouble。 He earned a good deal of money； but he
was careless and always wretchedly in debt。 He came to
me one day and told me he thought his wife would settle
for a hundred thousand marks and consent to a divorce。
I got very angry and sent him away。 Next day he came
back and said he thought she'd take fifty thousand。〃
Dr。 Archie drew away from her； to the end of the sofa。
〃Good God； Thea；〃 He ran his handkerchief over his
forehead。 〃What sort of people〃 He stopped and shook
his head。
Thea rose and stood beside him； her hand on his shoul…
der。 〃That's exactly how it struck me；〃 she said quietly。
〃Oh； we have things in common； things that go away back；
under everything。 You understand； of course。 Nordquist
didn't。 He thought I wasn't willing to part with the
money。 I couldn't let myself buy him from Fru Nord…
quist； and he couldn't see why。 He had always thought I
was close about money； so he attributed it to that。 I am
careful；〃she ran her arm through Archie's and when
he rose began to walk about the room with him。 〃I
can't be careless with money。 I began the world on six
hundred dollars； and it was the price of a man's life。 Ray
Kennedy had worked hard and been sober and denied him…
self； and when he died he had six hundred dollars to show
for it。 I always measure things by that six hundred dol…
lars； just as I measure high buildings by the Moonstone
standpipe。 There are standards we can't get away from。〃
Dr。 Archie took her hand。 〃I don't believe we should
be any happier if we did get away from them。 I think it
gives you some of your poise； having that anchor。 You
look；〃 glancing down at her head and shoulders； 〃some…
times so like your mother。〃
〃Thank you。 You couldn't say anything nicer to me
than that。 On Friday afternoon； didn't you think？〃
〃Yes； but at other times； too。 I love to see it。 Do you
know what I thought about that first night when I heard
you sing？ I kept remembering the night I took care of you
when you had pneumonia； when you were ten years old。
You were a terribly sick child； and I was a country doctor
without much experience。 There were no oxygen tanks
about then。 You pretty nearly slipped away from me。
If you had〃
Thea dropped her head on his shoulder。 〃I'd have
saved myself and you a lot of trouble； wouldn't I？ Dear
Dr。 Archie！〃 she murmured。
〃As for me； life would have been a pretty bleak stretch；
with you left out。〃 The doctor took one of the crystal
pendants that hung from her shoulder and looked into it
thoughtfully。 〃I guess I'm a romantic old fellow； under…
neath。 And you've always been my romance。 Those
years when you were growing up were my happiest。 When
I dream about you； I always see you as a little girl。〃
They paused by the open window。 〃Do you？ Nearly
all my dreams； except those about breaking down on the
stage or missing trains； are about Moonstone。 You tell
me the old house has been pulled down； but it stands in
my mind； every stick and timber。 In my sleep I go all
about it； and look in the right drawers and cupboards for
everything。 I often dream that I'm hunting for my rub…
bers in that pile of overshoes that was always under the
hatrack in the hall。 I pick up every overshoe and know
whose it is； but I can't find my own。 Then the school bell
begins to ring and I begin to cry。 That's the house I rest
in when I'm tired。 All the old furniture and the worn
spots in the carpetit rests my mind to go over them。〃
They were looking out of the window。 Thea kept his
arm。 Down on the river four battleships were anchored in
line； brilliantly lighted； and launches were coming and
going； bringing the men ashore。 A searchlight from one
of the ironclads was playing on the great headland up the
river； where it makes its first resolute turn。 Overhead the
night…blue sky was intense and clear。
〃There's so much that I want to tell you；〃 she said at
last； 〃and it's hard to explain。 My life is full of jealousies
and disappointments； you know。 You get to hating people
who do contemptible work and who get on just as well as you
do。 There are many disappointments in my profession； and
bitter； bitter contempts！〃 Her face hardened； and looked
much older。 〃If you love the good thing vitally； enough to
give up for it all that one must give up for it； then you
must hate the cheap thing just as hard。 I tell you； there
is such a thing as creative hate！ A contempt that drives
you through fire； makes you risk everything and lose
everything； makes you a long sight better than you ever
knew you could be。〃 As she glanced at Dr。 Archie's face；
Thea stopped short and turned her own face away。 Her
eyes followed the path of the searchlight up the river and
rested upon the illumined headland。
〃You see；〃 she went on more calmly； 〃voices are acci…
dental things。 You find plenty of good voices in common
women； with common minds and common hearts。 Look
at that woman who sang ORTRUDE with me last week。 She's
new here and the people are wild about her。 ‘Such a beau…
tiful volume of tone！' they say。 I give you my word she's
as stupid as an owl and as coarse as a pig； and any one
who knows anything about singing would see that in an
instant。 Yet she's quite as popular as Necker； who's a
great artist。 How can I get much satisfaction out of the
enthusiasm of a house that likes her atrociously bad per…
formance at the same time that it
