the magic skin-第55节
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unintentionally jarred on all the small susceptibilities of the circle
round about him。
His guests on various occasions； and those to whom he had lent his
horses； had taken offence at his luxurious ways； their ungraciousness
had been a surprise to him； he had spared them further humiliations of
that kind； and they had considered that he looked down upon them； and
had accused him of haughtiness ever since。 He could read their inmost
thoughts as he fathomed their natures in this way。 Society with its
polish and varnish grew loathsome to him。 He was envied and hated for
his wealth and superior ability； his reserve baffled the inquisitive；
his humility seemed like haughtiness to these petty superficial
natures。 He guessed the secret unpardonable crime which he had
committed against them； he had overstepped the limits of the
jurisdiction of their mediocrity。 He had resisted their inquisitorial
tyranny； he could dispense with their society； and all of them；
therefore； had instinctively combined to make him feel their power；
and to take revenge upon this incipient royalty by submitting him to a
kind of ostracism； and so teaching him that they in their turn could
do without him。
Pity came over him； first of all； at this aspect of mankind； but very
soon he shuddered at the thought of the power that came thus； at will；
and flung aside for him the veil of flesh under which the moral nature
is hidden away。 He closed his eyes； so as to see no more。 A black
curtain was drawn all at once over this unlucky phantom show of truth；
but still he found himself in the terrible loneliness that surrounds
every power and dominion。 Just then a violent fit of coughing seized
him。 Far from receiving one single wordindifferent； and meaningless；
it is true； but still containing； among well…bred people brought
together by chance； at least some pretence of civil commiserationhe
now heard hostile ejaculations and muttered complaints。 Society there
assembled disdained any pantomime on his account； perhaps because he
had gauged its real nature too well。
〃His complaint is contagious。〃
〃The president of the Club ought to forbid him to enter the salon。〃
〃It is contrary to all rules and regulations to cough in that way！〃
〃When a man is as ill as that； he ought not to come to take the
waters〃
〃He will drive me away from the place。〃
Raphael rose and walked about the rooms to screen himself from their
unanimous execrations。 He thought to find a shelter； and went up to a
young pretty lady who sat doing nothing； minded to address some pretty
speeches to her； but as he came towards her； she turned her back upon
him； and pretended to be watching the dancers。 Raphael feared lest he
might have made use of the talisman already that evening； and feeling
that he had neither the wish nor the courage to break into the
conversation； he left the salon and took refuge in the billiard…room。
No one there greeted him； nobody spoke to him； no one sent so much as
a friendly glance in his direction。 His turn of mind； naturally
meditative； had discovered instinctively the general grounds and
reasons for the aversion he inspired。 This little world was obeying；
unconsciously perhaps； the sovereign law which rules over polite
society； its inexorable nature was becoming apparent in its entirety
to Raphael's eyes。 A glance into the past showed it to him； as a type
completely realized in Foedora。
He would no more meet with sympathy here for his bodily ills than he
had received it at her hands for the distress in his heart。 The
fashionable world expels every suffering creature from its midst； just
as the body of a man in robust health rejects any germ of disease。 The
world holds suffering and misfortune in abhorrence； it dreads them
like the plague； it never hesitates between vice and trouble； for vice
is a luxury。 Ill…fortune may possess a majesty of its own； but society
can belittle it and make it ridiculous by an epigram。 Society draws
caricatures； and in this way flings in the teeth of fallen kings the
affronts which it fancies it has received from them； society； like the
Roman youth at the circus； never shows mercy to the fallen gladiator；
mockery and money are its vital necessities。 〃Death to the weak！〃 That
is the oath taken by this kind of Equestrian order； instituted in
their midst by all the nations of the world； everywhere it makes for
the elevation of the rich； and its motto is deeply graven in hearts
that wealth has turned to stone； or that have been reared in
aristocratic prejudices。
Assemble a collection of school…boys together。 That will give you a
society in miniature； a miniature which represents life more truly；
because it is so frank and artless； and in it you will always find
poor isolated beings； relegated to some place in the general
estimations between pity and contempt； on account of their weakness
and suffering。 To these the Evangel promises heaven hereafter。 Go
lower yet in the scale of organized creation。 If some bird among its
fellows in the courtyard sickens； the others fall upon it with their
beaks； pluck out its feathers； and kill it。 The whole world； in
accordance with its character of egotism； brings all its severity to
bear upon wretchedness that has the hardihood to spoil its
festivities； and to trouble its joys。
Any sufferer in mind or body； any helpless or poor man； is a pariah。
He had better remain in his solitude； if he crosses the boundary…line；
he will find winter everywhere； he will find freezing cold in other
men's looks； manners； words； and hearts； and lucky indeed is he if he
does not receive an insult where he expected that sympathy would be
expended upon him。 Let the dying keep to their bed of neglect； and age
sit lonely by its fireside。 Portionless maids； freeze and burn in your
solitary attics。 If the world tolerates misery of any kind； it is to
turn it to account for its own purposes； to make some use of it；
saddle and bridle it； put a bit in its mouth； ride it about； and get
some fun out of it。
Crotchety spinsters； ladies' companions； put a cheerful face upon it；
endure the humors of your so…called benefactress； carry her lapdogs
for her； you have an English poodle for your rival； and you must seek
to understand the moods of your patroness； and amuse her； andkeep
silence about yourselves。 As for you； unblushing parasite； uncrowned
king of unliveried servants； leave your real character at home； let
your digestion keep pace with your host's laugh when he laughs； mingle
your tears with his； and find his epigrams amusing； if you want to
relieve your mind about him； wait till he is ruined。 That is the way
the world shows its respect for the unfortunate； it persecutes them；
or slays them in the dust。
Such thoughts as these welled up in Raphael's heart with the
suddenness of poetic inspiration。 He looked around him； and felt the
influence of the forbidding gloom that society breathes out in order
to rid itself of the unfortunate； it nipped his soul more effectually
than the east wind grips the body in December。 He locked his arms over
his chest； set his back against the wall； and fell into a deep
melancholy。 He mused upon the meagre happiness that this depressing
way of living can give。 What did it amount to？ Amusement with no
pleasure in it； gaiety without gladness； joyless festivity； fevered
dreams empty of all delight； firewood or ashes on the hearth without a
spark of flame in them。 When he raised his head； he found himself
alone； all the billiard players had gone。
〃I have only to let them know my power to make them worship my
coughing fits；〃 he said to himself； and wrapped himself against the
world in the cloak of his contempt。
Next day the resident doctor came to call upon him； and took an
anxious interest in his health。 Raphael felt a thrill of joy at the
friendly words addressed to him。 The doctor's face； to his thinking；
wore an expression that was kind and pleasant； the pale curls of his
wig seemed redolent of philanthropy； the square cut of his coat； the
loose folds of his trousers； his big Quaker…like shoes； everything
about him down to the powder shaken from his queue and dusted in a
circle upon his slightly stooping shoulders； revealed an apostolic
nature； and spoke of Christian charity and of the self…sacrifice of a
man； who； out of sheer devotion to his patients； had compelled himself
to learn to play whist and tric…trac so well that he never lost money
to any of them。
〃My Lord Marquis；〃 said he； after a long talk with Raphael； 〃I can
dispel your uneasiness beyond all doubt。 I know your constitution well
enough by this time to assure you that the doctors in Paris； whose
great abilities I know； are mistaken as to the nature of your
complaint。 You can live as long as Methuselah； my Lord Marquis；
accidents only excepted。 Your lungs are as sound as a blacksmith's
bellows； your sto
