poor miss finch-第54节

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youthere　is　the　other　example　of　the　child　and　the　Indian　nurse　to
satisfy　you　that　it　is　only　a　question　of　time。　Sooner　or　later；　she　will
take　the　discovery　as　any　other　young　lady　would　take　it。　At　first；　she
will　be　indignant　with　you　for　deceiving　her；　and　then；　if　you　are　sure
of　your　place　in　her　affections；　she　will　end　in　forgiving　you。There　is
my　view　of　your　position；　and　there　are　the　grounds　on　which　I　form　it！
In　the　meantime；　my　own　opinion　remains　unshaken。　I　firmly　believe　that
you　will　never　have　occasion　to　act　on　the　advice　that　I　have　given　to
you。　When　the　bandage　is　taken　off；　the　chances　are　five　hundred　to　one
that　she　is　no　nearer　to　seeing　you　then　than　she　is　now。'　These　were　his
last　wordsand　on　that　we　parted。〃

Oscar　and　I　walked　on　again　for　a　little　way；　in　silence。

I　had　nothing　to　say　against　Mr。　Sebright's　reasons；　it　was　impossible　to
question　the　professional　experience　from　which　they　were　drawn。　As　to
blind　people　in　general；　I　felt　no　doubt　that　his　advice　was　good；　and
that　his　conclusions　were　arrived　at　correctly。　But　Lucilla's　was　no
ordinary　character。　My　experience　of　her　was　better　experience　than　Mr。
Sebright'sand　the　more　I　thought　of　the　future；　the　less　inclined　I
felt　to　share　Oscar's　hopeful　view。　She　was　just　the　person　to　say
something　or　do　something；　at　the　critical　moment　of　the　experiment；
which　would　take　the　wisest　previous　calculation　by　surprise。　Oscar's
prospects　never　had　looked　darker　to　me　than　they　looked　at　that　moment。

It　would　have　been　useless　and　cruel　to　have　said　to　him　what　I　have　just
said　here。　I　put　as　bright　a　face　on　it　as　I　could；　and　asked　if　he
proposed　to　follow　Mr。　Sebright's　advice。

〃Yes；〃　he　said。　〃With　a　certain　reservation　of　my　own；　which　occurred　to
me　after　I　had　left　his　house。〃

〃May　I　ask　what　it　is？〃

〃Certainly。　I　mean　to　beg　Nugent　to　leave　Dimchurch；　before　Lucilla　tries
her　sight　for　the　first　time。　He　will　do　that；　I　know；　to　please　me。〃

〃And　when　he　has　done　it；　what　then？〃

〃Then　I　mean　to　be　presentas　Mr。　Sebright　suggestedwhen　the　bandage
is　taken　off。〃

〃Previously　telling　Lucilla；〃　I　interposed；　〃that　it　is　you　who　are　in
the　room？〃

〃No。　There　I　take　the　precaution　that　I　alluded　to　just　now。　I　propose　to
leave　Lucilla　under　the　impression　that　it　is　I　who　have　left　Dimchurch；
and　that　Nugent's　face　is　the　face　she　sees。　If　Mr。　Sebright　proves　to　be
right；　and　if　her　first　sensation　is　a　sensation　of　relief；　I　will　own
the　truth　to　her　the　same　day。　If　not；　I　will　wait　to　make　my　confession
until　she　has　become　reconciled　to　the　sight　of　me。　That　plan　meets　every
possible　emergency。　It　is　one　of　the　few　good　ideas　that　my　stupid　head
has　hit　on　since　I　have　been　at　Dimchurch。〃

He　said　those　last　words　with　such　an　innocent　air　of　triumph；　that　I
really　could　not　find　it　in　my　heart　to　damp　his　ardor　by　telling　him
what　I　thought　of　his　idea。　All　I　said　was；　〃Don't　forget；　Oscar；　that
the　cleverest　plans　are　at　the　mercy　of　circumstances。　At　the　last
moment；　an　accident　may　happen　which　will　force　you　to　speak　out。〃

We　came　in　sight　of　the　rectory　as　I　gave　him　that　final　warning。　Nugent
was　strolling　up　and　down　the　road　on　the　look…out　for　us。　I　left　Oscar
to　tell　his　story　over　again　to　his　brother；　and　went　into　the　house。

Lucilla　was　at　her　piano　when　I　entered　the　sitting…room。　She　was　not
only　playingbut　（a　rare　thing　with　her）　singing　too。　The　song　was；
poetry　and　music　both；　of　her　own　composing。　〃I　shall　see　him！　I　shall
see　him！〃　In　those　four　words　the　composition　began　and　ended。　She
adapted　them　to　all　the　happy　melodies　in　her　memory。　She　accompanied
them　with　hands　that　seemed　to　be　mad　for　joyhands　that　threatened
every　moment　to　snap　the　chords　of　the　instrument。　Never；　since　my　first
day　at　the　rectory；　had　I　heard　such　a　noise　in　our　quiet　sitting…room　as
I　heard　now。　She　was　in　a　fever　of　exhilaration　which；　in　my　foreboding
frame　of　mind　at　that　moment；　it　pained　and　shocked　me　to　see。　I　lifted
her　off　the　music…stool；　and　shut　up　the　piano　by　main　force。

〃Compose　yourself　for　heaven's　sake；〃　I　said。　〃Do　you　want　to　be
completely　exhausted　when　the　German　comes　tomorrow？〃

That　consideration　instantly　checked　her。　She　suddenly　became　quiet；　with
the　abrupt　facility　of　a　child。

〃I　forgot　that；〃　she　said；　sitting　down　in　a　corner；　with　a　face　of
dismay。　〃He　might　refuse　to　perform　the　operation！　Oh；　my　dear；　quiet　me
down　somehow。　Get　a　book；　and　read　to　me。〃

I　got　the　book。　Ah；　the　poor　author！　Neither　she　nor　I　paid　the　slightest
attention　to　him。　Worse　still；　we　abused　him　for　not　interesting　usand
then　shut　him　up　with　a　bang；　and　pushed　him　rudely　into　his　place　on　the
book…shelf；　and　left　him　upside　down　and　went　to　bed。

She　was　standing　at　her　window　when　I　went　in　to　wish　her　good　night。　The
mellow　moonlight　fell　tenderly　on　her　lovely　face。

〃Moon　that　I　have　never　seen；〃　she　murmured　softly；　〃I　feel　you　looking
at　me！　Is　the　time　coming　when　I　shall　look　at　You？〃　She　turned　from　the
window；　and　eagerly　put　my　fingers　on　her　pulse。　〃Am　I　quite　composed
again？〃　she　asked。　〃Will　he　find　me　well　to…morrow？　Feel　it！　feel　it！　Is
it　quiet　now？〃

I　felt　itthrobbing　faster　and　faster。

〃Sleep　will　quiet　it；〃　I　saidand　kissed　her；　and　left　her。



She　slept　well。　As　for　me；　I　passed　such　a　wretched　night；　and　got　up　so
completely　worn　out；　that　I　had　to　go　back　to　my　room　after　breakfast；
and　lie　down　again。　Lucilla　persuaded　me　to　do　it。　〃Herr　Grosse　won't　be
here　till　the　afternoon；〃　she　said。　〃Rest　till　he　comes。〃

We　had　reckoned　without　allowing　for　the　eccentric　character　of　our
German　surgeon。　Excepting　the　business　of　his　profession；　Herr　Grosse　did
everything　by　impulse；　and　nothing　by　rule。　I　had　not　long　fallen　into　a
broken　unrefreshing　sleep；　when　I　felt　Zillah's　hand　on　my　shoulder；　and
heard　Zillah's　voice　in　my　ear。

〃Please　to　get　up；　ma'am！　He's　herehe　has　come　from　London　by　the
morning　train。〃

I　hurried　into　the　sitting…room。

There；　at　the　table；　sat　Herr　Grosse　with　an　open　instrument…case　before
him；　his　wild　black　eyes　gloating　over　a　hideous　array　of　scissors；
probes；　and　knives；　and　his　shabby　hat　hard　by　with　lint　and　bandages
huddled　together　anyhow　inside　it。　And　there　stood　Lucilla　by　his　side；
stooping　over　himwith　one　hand　laid　familiarly　on　his　shoulder；　and
with　the　other　deftly　fingering　one　of　his　horrid　instruments　to　find　out
what　it　was　like！


THE　END　OF　THE　FIRST　PART



PART　THE　SECOND


CHAPTER　THE　THIRTY…FOURTH

Nugent　shows　his　Hand

I　CLOSED　the　First　Part　of　my　narrative　on　the　day　of　the　operation；　the
twenty…fifth　of　June。

I　open　the　Second　Part；　between　six　and　seven　weeks　later；　on　the　ninth
of　August。

How　did　the　time　pass　at　Dimchurch　in　that　interval？

Searching　backwards　in　my　memory；　I　call　to　life　again　the　domestic
history　of　the　six　weeks。　It　looks；　on　retrospection；　miserably　dull　and
empty　of　incident。　I　wonder　when　I　contemplate　it　now；　how　we　got　through
that　weary　intervalhow　we　bore　that　forced　inaction；　that　unrelieved
oppression　of　suspense。



Changing　from　bed…room　to　sitting…room；　from　sitting…room　back　to
bed…room；　with　the　daylight　always　shut　out；　with　the　bandages　always　on；
except　when　the　surgeon　looked　at　her　eyes；　Lucilla　bore　the
imprisonmentand　worse　than　the　imprisonment；　the　uncertaintyof　her
period　of　probation；　with　the　courage　that　can　endure　anything；　the
courage　sustained　by　Hope。　With　books；　with　music；　with　talkabove　all；
with　Love　to　help　hershe　counted　her　way　calmly　through　the　dull
succession　of　hours　and　days　till　the　time　came　which　was　to　decide　the
question　in　dispute　between　the　oculiststhe　terrible　question　of　which
of　the　two；　Mr。　Sebright　or　Herr　Grosse；　was　right。

I　was　not　present　at　the　examination　which　finally　decided　all　doubt。　I
joined　Oscar　in　the　gardenquite　as　incapable　as　he　was　of　exerting　the
slightest　self…control。　We　paced　silently　backwards　and　forwards　on　the
lawn；　like　two　animals　in　a　cage。　Zillah　was　the　only　witness　present
when　the　German　examined　our　poor　darling's　eyes；　Nugent　engaging　to　wait
in　the　next　room　and　announce　the　result　from　the　window。　As　the　event
turned　out；　Herr　Grosse　was　beforehand　with　him。　Once　more　we　heard　his
broken　English　shouting；　〃Hi…hi…hoi！　hoi…hi！　hoi…hi！〃　Once　more；　we
beheld　his　huge　silk　handkerchief　waving　at　the　window。　I　turned　sick　and
faint　under　the　excitement　of　the　momentunder　the　rapture　（it　was
nothing　less）　of　hearing　those　three　electrifying　words：　〃She　will　see！〃
Mercy！　how　we　did　abuse　Mr。　Sebright；　when　we　were　all　reunited　again　in
Lucilla's　room！

The　first　excitement　over；　we　had　our　difficulties　to　contend　with　next。

From　the　moment　when　she　was　positively　informed　that　the　operation　had
succeeded；　our　once…patient　Lucilla　developed　into　a　new　being。　She　now
rose　in　perpetual　revolt　against　the　caution　which　still　deferred　the　day
on　which　she　was　to　be　allowed　to　make　the　first　trial　of　her　sight。　It
required　all　my　influence；　backed　by　Oscar's　entreaties；　and　strengthened
by　the　furious　foreign　English　of　our　excellent　German　surgeo