poor miss finch-第41节

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But　I　had　my　reason　too。　If　I　disapproved　of　the　resolution　at　which
Nugent　had　arrived；　I　viewed　far　more　unfavorably　the　selfish　weakness　on
Oscar's　part；　which　had　allowed　his　brother　to　sacrifice　himself。
Lucilla's　lover　had　sunk　to　something　very　like　a　despicable　character　in
my　estimation。　I　felt　that　I　might　let　him　see　what　I　thought　of　him；　if
I　found　myself　in　his　company　at　that　moment。

〃Considering　the　object　that　you　have　in　view；　my　dear；〃　I　said　to
Lucilla；　〃do　you　think　you　want　_me_　at　Browndown？〃

〃Haven't　I　already　told　you？〃　she　asked　impatiently。　〃I　am　so　nervousso
completely　upsetthat　I　don't　feel　equal　to　going　out　by　myself。　Have
you　no　sympathy　for　me？　Suppose　_you_　had　dreamed　that　you　were　marrying
Nugent　instead　of　Oscar？〃

〃Ah；　bah！　what　of　that？　I　should　only　have　dreamed　that　I　was　marrying
the　most　agreeable　man　of　the　two。〃

〃The　most　agreeable　man　of　the　two！　There　you　are　againalways　unjust　to
Oscar。〃

〃My　love！　if　you　could　see　for　yourself；　you　would　learn　to　appreciate
Nugent's　good　qualities；　as　I　do。〃

〃I　prefer　appreciating　Oscar's　good　qualities。〃

〃You　are　prejudiced；　Lucilla。〃

〃So　are　you！〃

〃You　happen　to　have　met　Oscar　first。〃

〃That　has　nothing　to　do　with　it。〃

〃Yes！　yes！　If　Nugent　had　followed　us；　instead　of　Oscar；　if；　of　those　two
charming　voices　which　are　both　the　same；　one　had　spoken　instead　of　the
other〃

〃I　won't　hear　a　word　more！〃

〃Tra…la…la…la！　It　happens　to　have　been　Oscar。　Turn　it　the　other　wayand
Nugent　might　have　been　the　man。

〃Madame　Pratolungo；　I　am　not　accustomed　to　be　insulted！　I　have　no　more　to
say　to　you。〃

With　that　dignified　reply；　and　with　the　loveliest　color　in　her　face　that
you　ever　saw　in　your　life；　my　darling　Lucilla　turned　her　pretty　back　on
me；　and　set　off　for　Browndown　by　herself。

Ah；　my　rash　tongue！　Ah；　my　nasty　foreign　temper！　Why　did　I　let　her
irritate　me？　I；　the　elder　of　the　twowhy　did　I　not　set　her　an　example　of
self…control？　Who　can　tell？　When　does　a　woman　know　why　she　does　anything？
Did　Eve　knowwhen　Mr。　Serpent　offered　her　the　applewhy　she　ate　it？　not
she！

What　was　to　be　done　now？　Two　things　were　to　be　done。　First　thing：To
cool　myself　down。　Second　thing：To　follow　Lucilla；　and　kiss　and　make　it
up。

Either　I　took　some　time　to　coolor；　in　the　irritation　of　the　moment；
Lucilla　walked　faster　than　usual。　She　had　got　to　Browndown　before　I　could
overtake　her。　On　opening　the　house…door；　I　heard　them　talking。　It　would
hardly　do　to　disturb　themespecially　now　I　was　in　disgrace。　While　I　was
hesitating；　and　wondering　what　my　next　proceeding　had　better　be；　my　eye
was　attracted　by　a　letter　lying　on　the　hall…table。　I　looked　（one　is
always　inquisitive　in　those　idle　moments　when　one　doesn't　know　what　to
do）I　looked　at　the　address。　The　letter　was　directed　to　Nugent；　and　the
post…mark　was　Liverpool。

I　drew　the　inevitable　conclusion。　The　German　oculist　was　in　England！

CHAPTER　THE　TWENTY…EIGHTH

He　crosses　the　Rubicon

I　WAS　still　in　doubt；　whether　to　enter　the　room；　or　to　wait　outside　until
she　left　Browndown　to　return　to　the　rectorywhen　Lucilla's　keen　sense　of
hearing　decided　the　question　which　I　had　been　unable　to　settle　for
myself。　The　door　of　the　room　opened；　and　Oscar　advanced　into　the　hall。

〃Lucilla　insisted　that　she　heard　somebody　outside；〃　he　said。　〃Who　could
have　guessed　it　was　you？　Why　did　you　wait　in　the　hall？　Come　in！　come　in！〃

He　held　open　the　door　for　me；　and　I　went　in。　Oscar　announced　me　to
Lucilla。　〃It　was　Madame　Pratolungo　you　heard；〃　he　said。　She　took　no
notice　either　of　him　or　of　me。　A　heap　of　flowers　from　Oscar's　garden　lay
in　her　lap。　With　the　help　of　her　clever　fingers；　she　was　sorting　them　to
make　a　nosegay；　as　quickly　and　as　tastefully　as　if　she　had　possessed　the
sense　of　sight。　In　all　my　experience　of　that　charming　face；　it　had　never
looked　so　hard　as　it　looked　now。　Nobody　would　have　recognized　her
likeness　to　the　Madonna　of　Raphael's　picture。　Offendedmortally　offended
with　meI　saw　it　at　a　glance。

〃I　hope　you　will　forgive　my　intrusion；　Lucilla；　when　you　know　my　motive；〃
I　said。　〃I　have　followed　you　here　to　make　my　excuses。〃

〃Oh；　don't　think　of　making　excuses！〃　she　rejoined；　giving　three…fourths
of　her　attention　to　the　flowers；　and　one…fourth　to　me。　〃It's　a　pity　you
took　the　trouble　of　coming　here。　I　quite　agree　with　what　you　said　in　the
garden。　Considering　the　object　I　had　in　view　at　Browndown；　I　could　not
possibly　expect　you　to　accompany　me。　True！　quite　true！〃

I　kept　my　temper。　Not　that　I　am　a　patient　woman：　not　that　I　possess　a
meek　disposition。　Very　far　from　it；　I　regret　to　say。　Nevertheless；　I　kept
my　temperso　far。

〃I　wish　to　apologize　for　what　I　said　in　the　garden；〃　I　resumed。　〃I　spoke
thoughtlessly；　Lucilla。　It　is　impossible　that　I　could　intentionally
offend　you。〃

I　might　as　well　have　spoken　to　one　of　the　chairs。　The　whole　of　her
attention　became　absorbed　in　the　breathless　interest　of　making　her
nosegay。

〃_Was_　I　offended？〃　she　said；　addressing　herself　to　the　flowers。
〃Excessively　foolish　of　me；　if　I　was。〃　She　suddenly　became　conscious　of
my　existence。　〃You　had　a　perfect　right　to　express　your　opinion；〃　she　said
loftily。　〃Accept　_my_　excuses　if　I　appeared　to　dispute　it。〃

She　tossed　her　pretty　head；　she　showed　her　brightest　color；　she　tapped
her　nice　little　foot　briskly　on　the　floor。　（Oh；　Lucilla！　Lucilla！）　I
still　kept　my　temper。　More；　by　this　time　（I　admit；）　for　Oscar's　sake　than
for　her　sake。　He　looked　so　distressed；　poor　fellowso　painfully　anxious
to　interfere；　without　exactly　knowing　how。

〃My　dear　Lucilla！〃　he　began。　〃Surely　you　might　answer　Madame
Pratolungo〃

She　petulantly　interrupted　him；　with　another　toss　of　the　heada　little
higher　than　the　last。

〃I　don't　attempt　to　answer　Madame　Pratolungo！　I　prefer　admitting　that
Madame　Pratolungo　may　have　been　quite　right。　I　dare　say　I　am　ready　to
fall　in　love　with　the　first　man　who　comes　my　way。　I　dare　sayif　I　had
met　your　brother　before　I　met　youI　should　have　fallen　in　love　with
_him。_　Quite　likely！〃

〃Quite　likelyas　you　say；〃answered　poor　Oscar；　humbly。　〃I　am　sure　I
think　it　very　lucky　for　_me；_　that　you　didn't　meet　Nugent　first。〃

She　threw　her　lapful　of　flowers　away　from　her　on　the　table　at　which　she
was　sitting。　She　became　perfectly　furious　with　him　for　taking　my　side。　I
permitted　myself　（the　poor　child　could　not　see　it；　remember）；　the
harmless　indulgence　of　a　smile。

〃You　agree　with　Madame　Pratolungo；〃　she　said　to　him　viciously。　〃Madame
Pratolungo　thinks　your　brother　a　much　more　agreeable　man　than　you。〃

Humble　Oscar　shook　his　head　in　melancholy　acknowledgment　of　this
self…evident　fact。　〃There　can　be　no　two　opinions　about　that；〃　he　said
resignedly。

She　stamped　her　foot　on　the　carpetand　raised　quite　a　little　cloud　of
dust。　My　lungs　are　occasionally　delicate。　I　permitted　myself　another
harmless　indulgenceindulgence　in　a　slight　cough。　She　heard　the　second
indulgenceand　suddenly　controlled　herself；　the　instant　it　reached　her
ears。　I　am　afraid　she　took　my　cough　as　my　commentary　on　what　was　going
on。

〃Come　here；　Oscar；〃　she　said；　with　a　complete　change　of　tone　and　manner。
〃Come　and　sit　down　by　me。〃

Oscar　obeyed。

〃Put　your　arm　round　my　waist。〃

Oscar　looked　at　me。　Having　the　use　of　his　sight；　he　was　sensible　of　the
absurd　side　of　the　demonstration　required　of　himin　the　presence　of　a
third　person。　She；　poor　soul；　strong　in　her　blind　insensibility　to　all
shafts　of　ridicule　shot　from　the　eye；　cared　nothing　for　the　presence　of　a
third　person。　She　repeated　her　commands；　in　a　tone　which　said　sharply；
〃Embrace　meI　am　not　to　be　trifled　with。〃

Oscar　timidly　put　his　arm　round　her　waistwith　an　appealing　look　at　me。
She　issued　another　command　instantly。

〃Say　you　love　me。〃

Oscar　hesitated。

〃Say　you　love　me！〃

Oscar　whispered　it。

〃Out　loud！〃

Endurance　has　its　limits：　I　began　to　lose　my　temper。　She　could　not　have
been　more　superbly　indifferent　to　my　presence；　if　there　had　been　a　cat　in
the　room　instead　of　a　lady。

〃Permit　me　to　inform　you；〃　I　said；　〃that　I　have　not　（as　you　appear　to
suppose）　left　the　room。〃

She　took　no　notice。　She　went　on　with　her　commands；　rising　irrepressibly
from　one　amatory　climax　to　another。

〃Give　me　a　kiss！〃

Unhappy　Oscarsacrificed　between　usblushed。　Stop！　Don't　revel
prematurely　in　the　greatest　enjoyment　a　reader　hasnamely；　catching　a
writer　out　in　a　mistake。　I　have　not　forgotten　that　his　disfigured
complexion　would　prevent　his　blush　from　showing　on　the　surface。　I　beg　to
say　I　saw　it　under　the　surfacesaw　it　in　his　expression：　I　repeathe
blushed。

I　felt　it　necessary　to　assert　myself　for　the　second　time。

〃I　have　only　one　object　in　remaining　in　the　room；　Miss　Finch。　I　merely
wish　to　know　whether　you　refuse　to　accept　my　excuses。

〃Oscar！　give　me　a　kiss！〃

He　still　hesitated。　She　threw　her　arm　round　his　neck。　My　duty　to　myself
was　plainmy　duty　was　to　go。

〃Good　afternoon；　Mr。　Dubourg；〃　I　saidand　turned　to　the　door。　She　heard
me　cross　the　room；　and　called　to　me　to　stop。　I　paused。　There　was　a　glass
on　the　wall　opposite　to　me。　On　the　authority　of　the　glass；　I　beg　to
mention　that　I　paused　in　my　most　becoming　manner。　Grace　tempered　with
dignity：　dignity　t