the professor at the breakfast table-第35节
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Heed well the lessons ye have heard
》From those old teachers taught of God。
〃Yet think not unto them was lent
All light for all the coming days;
And Heaven's eternal wisdom spent
In making straight the ancient ways。
〃The living fountain overflows
For every flock; for every lamb;
Nor heeds; though angry creeds oppose
With Luther's dike or Calvin's dam。〃
He spake; with lingering; long embrace;
With tears of love and partings fond;
They floated down the creeping Maas;
Along the isle of Ysselmond。
They passed the frowning towers of Briel;
The 〃Hook of Holland's〃 shelf of sand;
And grated soon with lifting keel
The sullen shores of Fatherland。
No home for these! too well they knew
The mitred king behind the throne;
The sails were set; the pennons flew;
And westward ho! for worlds unknown。
And these were they who gave us birth;
The Pilgrims of the sunset wave;
Who won for us this virgin earth;
And freedom with the soil they gave。
The pastor slumbers by the Rhine;
In alien earth the exiles lie;
Their nameless graves our holiest shrine;
His words our noblest battle…cry!
Still cry them; and the world shall hear;
Ye dwellers by the storm…swept sea!
Ye have not built by Haerlem Meer;
Nor on the land…locked Zuyder…Zee!
VIII
There has been a sort of stillness in the atmosphere of our
boarding…house since my last record; as if something or other were
going on。 There is no particular change that I can think of in the
aspect of things; yet I have a feeling as if some game of life were
quietly playing and strange forces were at work; underneath this
smooth surface of every…day boardinghouse life; which would show
themselves some fine morning or other in events; if not in
catastrophes。 I have been watchful; as I said I should be; but have
little to tell as yet。 You may laugh at me; and very likely think
me foolishly fanciful to trouble myself about what is going on in a
middling…class household like ours。 Do as you like。 But here is
that terrible fact to begin with;a beautiful young girl; with the
blood and the nerve…fibre that belong to Nature's women; turned
loose among live men。
…Terrible fact?
Very terrible。 Nothing more so。 Do you forget the angels who lost
heaven for the daughters of men? Do you forget Helen; and the fair
women who made mischief and set nations by the ears before Helen was
born? If jealousies that gnaw men's hearts out of their bodies;if
pangs that waste men to shadows and drive them into raving madness
or moping melancholy;if assassination and suicide are dreadful
possibilities; then there is always something frightful about a
lovely young woman。 I love to look at this 〃Rainbow;〃 as her
father used sometimes to call her; of ours。 Handsome creature that
she is in forms and colors;the very picture; as it seems to me; of
that 〃golden blonde〃 my friend whose book you read last year fell in
love with when he was a boy; (as you remember; no doubt;)handsome
as she is; fit for a sea…king's bride; it is not her beauty alone
that holds my eyes upon her。 Let me tell you one of my fancies; and
then you will understand the strange sort of fascination she has for
me。
It is in the hearts of many men and womenlet me add childrenthat
there is a Great Secret waiting for them;a secret of which they
get hints now and then; perhaps oftener in early than in later
years。 These hints come sometimes in dreams; sometimes in sudden
startling flashes;second wakings; as it were;a waking out of the
waking state; which last is very apt to be a half…sleep。 I have
many times stopped short and held my breath; and felt the blood
leaving my cheeks; in one of these sudden clairvoyant flashes。 Of
course I cannot tell what kind of a secret this is; but I think of
it as a disclosure of certain relations of our personal being to
time and space; to other intelligences; to the procession of events;
and to their First Great Cause。 This secret seems to be broken up;
as it were; into fragments; so that we find here a word and there a
syllable; and then again only a letter of it; but it never is
written out for most of us as a complete sentence; in this life。 I
do not think it could be; for I am disposed to consider our beliefs
about such a possible disclosure rather as a kind of premonition of
an enlargement of our faculties in some future state than as an
expectation to be fulfilled for most of us in this life。 Persons;
however; have fallen into trances;as did the Reverend William
Tennent; among many others;and learned some things which they
could not tell in our human words。
Now among the visible objects which hint to us fragments of this
infinite secret for which our souls are waiting; the faces of women
are those that carry the most legible hieroglyphics of the great
mystery。 There are women's faces; some real; some ideal; which
contain something in them that becomes a positive element in our
creed; so direct and palpable a revelation is it of the infinite
purity and love。 I remember two faces of women with wings; such as
they call angels; of Fra Angelico;and I just now came across a
print of Raphael's Santa Apollina; with something of the same
quality;which I was sure had their prototypes in the world above
ours。 No wonder the Catholics pay their vows to the Queen of
Heaven! The unpoetical side of Protestantism is; that it has no
women to be worshipped。
But mind you; it is not every beautiful face that hints the Great
Secret to us; nor is it only in beautiful faces that we find traces
of it。 Sometimes it looks out from a sweet sad eye; the only beauty
of a plain countenance; sometimes there is so much meaning in the
lips of a woman; not otherwise fascinating; that we know they have a
message for us; and wait almost with awe to hear their accents。 But
this young girl has at once the beauty of feature and the unspoken
mystery of expression。 Can she tell me anything?
Is her life a complement of mine; with the missing element in it
which I have been groping after through so many friendships that I
have tired of; and throughHush! Is the door fast? Talking loud
is a bad trick in these curious boarding…houses。
You must have sometimes noted this fact that I am going to remind
you of and to use for a special illustration。 Riding along over a
rocky road; suddenly the slow monotonous grinding of the crushing
gravel changes to a deep heavy rumble。 There is a great hollow
under your feet;a huge unsunned cavern。 Deep; deep beneath you in
the core of the living rock; it arches its awful vault; and far away
it stretches its winding galleries; their roofs dripping into
streams where fishes have been swimming and spawning in the dark
until their scales are white as milk and their eyes have withered
out; obsolete and useless。
So it is in life。 We jog quietly along; meeting the same faces;
grinding over the same thoughts; the gravel of the soul's highway;
now and then jarred against an obstacle we cannot crush; but must
ride over or round as we best may; sometimes bringing short up
against a disappointment; but still working along with the creaking
and rattling and grating and jerking that belong to the journey of
life; even in the smoothest…rolling vehicle。 Suddenly we hear the
deep underground reverberation that reveals the unsuspected depth of
some abyss of thought or passion beneath us。
I wish the girl would go。 I don't like to look at her so much; and
yet I cannot help it。 Always that same expression of something that
I ought to know;something that she was made to tell and I to
hear;lying there ready to fall off from her lips; ready to leap
out of her eyes and make a saint of me; or a devil or a lunatic; or
perhaps a prophet to tell the truth and be hated of men; or a poet
whose words shall flash upon the dry stubble…field of worn…out
thoughts and burn over an age of lies in an hour of passion。
It suddenly occurs to me that I may have put you on the wrong track。
The Great Secret that I refer to has nothing to do with the Three
Words。 Set your mind at ease about that;there are reasons I could
give you which settle all that matter。 I don't wonder; however;
that you confounded the Great Secret with the Three Words。
I LOVE YOU is all the secret that many; nay; most women have to
tell。 When that is said; they are like China…crackers on the
morning of the fifth of July。 And just as that little patriotic
implement is made with a slender train which leads to the magazine
in its interior; so a sharp eye can almost always see the train
leading from a young girl's eye or lip to the 〃I love you〃 in her
heart。 But the Three Words are not the Great Secret I mean。 No;
women's faces are only one of the tablets on which that is written
in its partial; fragmentary symbols。 It lies deeper than Love;
though very proba