barnaby rudge(巴纳比·卢杰)-第117节
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moment he was gone upon his charitable errand。 The blind man
sat listening with an attentive face； until long after the sound of his
retreating footsteps was inaudible to the widow； and then said；
suddenly； and in a very altered tone：
‘There are various degrees and kinds of blindness； widow。
There is the connubial blindness； ma’am； which perhaps you may
have observed in the course of your own experience； and which is
a kind of wilful and self…bandaging blindness。 There is the
blindness of party； ma’am； and public men； which is the blindness
of a mad bull in the midst of a regiment of soldiers clothed in red。
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There is the blind confidence of youth； which is the blindness of
young kittens； whose eyes have not yet opened on the world； and
there is that physical blindness； ma’am； of which I am； contrary to
my own desire； a most illustrious example。 Added to these； ma’am；
is that blindness of the intellect； of which we have a specimen in
your interesting son； and which； having sometimes glimmerings
and dawnings of the light； is scarcely to be trusted as a total
darkness。 Therefore； ma’am； I have taken the liberty to get him
out of the way for a short time； while you and I confer together；
and this precaution arising out of the delicacy of my sentiments
towards yourself； you will excuse me； ma’am； I know。’
Having delivered himself of this speech with many flourishes of
manner； he drew from beneath his coat a flat stone bottle； and
holding the cork between his teeth； qualified his mug of water with
a plentiful infusion of the liquor it contained。 He politely drained
the bumper to her health； and the ladies； and setting it down
empty； smacked his lips with infinite relish。
‘I am a citizen of the world； ma’am；’ said the blind man； corking
his bottle； ‘and if I seem to conduct myself with freedom； it is
therefore。 You wonder who I am； ma’am； and what has brought
me here。 Such experience of human nature as I have； leads me to
that conclusion； without the aid of eyes by which to read the
movements of your soul as depicted in your feminine features。 I
will satisfy your curiosity immediately； ma’am； immediately。’ With
that he slapped his bottle on its broad back； and having put it
under his garment as before； crossed his legs and folded his hands；
and settled himself in his chair； previous to proceeding any
further。
The change in his manner was so unexpected； the craft and
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wickedness of his deportment were so much aggravated by his
condition—for we are accustomed to see in those who have lost a
human sense； something in its place almost divine—and this
alteration bred so many fears in her whom he addressed； that she
could not pronounce one word。 After waiting； as it seemed； for
some remark or answer； and waiting in vain； the visitor resumed：
‘Madam； my name is Stagg。 A friend of mine who has desired
the honour of meeting with you any time these five years past； has
commissioned me to call upon you。 I should be glad to whisper
that gentleman’s name in your ear。—Zounds； ma’am； are you
deaf？ Do you hear me say that I should be glad to whisper my
friend’s name in your ear？’
‘You need not repeat it；’ said the widow； with a stifled groan； ‘I
see too well from whom you come。’
‘But as a man of honour； ma’am；’ said the blind man； striking
himself on the breast； ‘whose credentials must not be disputed； I
take leave to say that I will mention that gentleman’s name。 Ay；
ay；’ he added； seeming to catch with his quick ear the very motion
of her hand； ‘but not aloud。 With your leave； ma’am； I desire the
favour of a whisper。’
She moved towards him； and stooped down。 He muttered a
word in her ear； and； wringing her hands； she paced up and down
the room like one distracted。 The blind man； with perfect
composure； produced his bottle again； mixed another glassful； put
it up as before； and； drinking from time to time； followed her with
his face in silence。
‘You are slow in conversation； widow；’ he said after a time；
pausing in his draught。 ‘We shall have to talk before your son。’
‘What would you have me do？’ she answered。 ‘What do you
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want？’
‘We are poor； widow； we are poor；’ he retorted； stretching out
his right hand； and rubbing his thumb upon its palm。
‘Poor！’ she cried。 ‘And what am I？’
‘Comparisons are odious；’ said the blind man。 ‘I don’t know； I
don’t care。 I say that we are poor。 My friend’s circumstances are
indifferent； and so are mine。 We must have our rights； widow； or
we must be bought off。 But you know that； as well as I； so where is
the use of talking？’
She still walked wildly to and fro。 At length； stopping abruptly
before him； she said：
‘Is he near here？’
‘He is。 Close at hand。’
‘Then I am lost！’
‘Not lost； widow；’ said the blind man； calmly； ‘only found。 Shall
I call him？’
‘Not for the world；’ she answered； with a shudder。
‘Very good；’ he replied； crossing his legs again； for he had made
as though he would rise and walk to the door。 ‘As you please；
widow。 His presence is not necessary that I know of。 But both he
and I must live； to live； we must eat and drink； to eat and drink； we
must have money：—I say no more。’
‘Do you know how pinched and destitute I am？’ she retorted。 ‘I
do not think you do； or can。 If you had eyes； and could look around
you on this poor place； you would have pity on me。 Oh！ let your
heart be softened by your own affliction； friend； and have some
sympathy with mine。’
The blind man snapped his fingers as he answered：
‘—Beside the question； ma’am； beside the question。 I have the
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softest heart in the world； but I can’t live upon it。 Many a
gentleman lives well upon a soft head； who would find a heart of
the same quality a very great drawback。 Listen to me。 This is a
matter of business； with which sympathies and sentiments have
nothing to do。 As a mutual friend； I wish to arrange it in a
satisfactory manner； if possible； and thus the case stands。—If you
are very poor now； it’s your own choice。 You have friends who； in
case of need； are always ready to help you。 My friend is in a more
destitute and desolate situation than most men； and； you and he
being linked together in a common cause； he naturally looks to
you to assist him。 He has boarded and lodged with me a long time
（for as I said just now； I am very soft…hearted）； and I quite approve
of his entertaining this opinion。 You have always had a roof over
your head； he has always been an outcast。 You have your son to
comfort and assist you； he has nobody at all。 The advantages must
not be all one side。 You are in the same boat； and we must divide
the ballast a little more equally。’
She was about to speak； but he checked her； and went on。
‘The only way of doing this； is by making up a little purse now
and then for my friend； and that’s what I advise。 He bears you no
malice that I know of； ma’am： so little； that although you have
treated him harshly more than once； and driven him； I
