the expedition of humphry clinker-第25节

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paved　with　gravel；　part　exhibiting　a　wonderful　assemblage　of　the
most　picturesque　and　striking　objects'　pavilions；　lodges；　groves；
grottoes；　lawns；　temples　and　cascades；　porticoes；　colonades；　and
rotundos；　adorned　with　pillars；　statues；　and　painting：　the　whole
illuminated　with　an　infinite　number　of　lamps；　disposed　in
different　figures　of　suns；　stars；　and　constellations；　the　place
crowded　with　the　gayest　company；　ranging　through　those　blissful
shades；　or　supping　in　different　lodges　on　cold　collations；
enlivened　with　mirth；　freedom；　and　good　humour；　and　animated　by
an　excellent　band　of　music。　Among　the　vocal　performers　I　had　the
happiness　to　hear　the　celebrated　Mrs　；　whose　voice　was　loud　and
shrill；　that　it　made　my　head　ake　through　excess　of　pleasure。

In　about　half　an　hour　after　we　arrived　we　were　joined　by　my
uncle；　who　did　not　seem　to　relish　the　place。　People　of　experience
and　infirmity；　my　dear　Letty；　see　with　very　different　eyes　from
those　that　such　as　you　and　I　make　use　of　　Our　evening's
entertainment　was　interrupted　by　an　unlucky　accident。　In　one　of
the　remotest　walks　we　were　surprised　with　a　sudden　shower；　that
set　the　whole　company　a…running；　and　drove　us　in　heaps；　one　upon
another；　into　the　rotunda；　where　my　uncle；　finding　himself　wet；
began　to　be　very　peevish　and　urgent　to　be　gone。　My　brother　went
to　look　for　the　coach；　and　found　it　with　much　difficulty；　but　as
it　could　not　hold　us　all；　Mr　Barton　stayed　behind。　It　was　some
time　before　the　carriage　could　be　brought　up　to　the　gate；　in　the
confusion；　notwithstanding　the　utmost　endeavours　of　our　new
footman；　Humphry　Clinker；　who　lost　his　scratch　periwig；　and　got　a
broken　head　in　the　scuffle。　The　moment　we　were　seated；　my　aunt
pulled　off　my　uncle's　shoes；　and　carefully　wrapped　his　poor　feet
in　her　capuchin；　then　she　gave　him　a　mouth…ful　of　cordial；　which
she　always　keeps　in　her　pocket；　and　his　clothes　were　shifted　as
soon　as　we　arrived　at　lodgings；　so　that；　blessed　be　God；　he
escaped　a　severe　cold；　of　which　he　was　in　great　terror。

As　for　Mr　Barton；　I　must　tell　you　in　confidence；　he　was　a　little
particular；　but；　perhaps；　I　mistake　his　complaisance；　and　I　wish
I　may；　for　his　sake　　You　know　the　condition　of　my　poor　heart：
which；　in　spite　of　hard　usage　　And　yet　I　ought　not　to　complain：
nor　will　I；　till　farther　information。

Besides　Ranelagh　and　Vauxhall；　I　have　been　at　Mrs　Cornelys'
assembly；　which；　for　the　rooms；　the　company；　the　dresses；　and
decorations；　surpasses　all　description；　but　as　I　have　no　great
turn　for　card　playing；　I　have　not　yet　entered　thoroughly　into　the
spirit　of　the　place：　indeed　I　am　still　such　a　country　hoyden；
that　I　could　hardly　find　patience　to　be　put　in　a　condition　to
appear；　yet；　as　I　was　not　above　six　hours　under　the　hands　of　the
hair…dresser；　who　stuffed　my　head　with　as　much　black　wool　as
would　have　made　a　quilted　petticoat；　and；　after　all；　it　was　the
smallest　head　in　the　assembly；　except　my　aunt's　　She；　to　be　sure；
was　so　particular　with　her　rumpt　gown　and　petticoat；　her　scanty
curls；　her　lappethead；　deep　triple　ruffles；　and　high　stays；　that
every　body　looked　at　her　with　surprise：　some　whispered；　and　some
tittered；　and　lady　Griskin；　by　whom　we　were　introduced；　flatly
told　her；　she　was　twenty　good　years　behind　the　fashion。

Lady　Griskin　is　a　person　of　fashion；　to　whom　we　have　the　honour
to　be　related。　She　keeps　a　small　rout　at　her　own　house；　never
exceeding　ten　or　a　dozen　card…tables；　but　these　are　frequented　by
the　best　company　in　town　　She　has　been　so　obliging　as　to
introduce　my　aunt　and　me　to　some　of　her　particular　friends　of
quality；　who　treat　us　with　the　most　familiar　good…humour：　we　have
once　dined　with　her；　and　she　takes　the　trouble　to　direct　us　in
all　our　motions。　I　am　so　happy　as　to　have　gained　her　goodwill　to
such　a　degree；　that　she　sometimes　adjusts　my　cap　with　her　own
hands；　and　she　has　given　me　a　kind　invitation　to　stay　with　her
all　the　winter。　This；　however；　has　been　cruelly　declined　by　my
uncle　who　seems　to　be　（I　know　not　how）　prejudiced　against　the
good　lady；　for；　whenever　my　aunt　happens　to　speak　in　her
commendation；　I　observe　that　he　makes　wry　faces；　though　he　says
nothing　　Perhaps；　indeed；　these　grimaces　may　be　the　effect　of
pain　arising　from　the　gout　and　rheumatism；　with　which　he　is　sadly
distressed　　To　me；　however；　he　is　always　good…natured　and
generous；　even　beyond　my　wish。　Since　we　came　hither；　he　has　made
me　a　present　of　a　suit　of　clothes；　with　trimmings　and　laces；
which　cost　more　money　than　I　shall　mention；　and　Jery；　at　his
desire；　has　given　me　my　mother's　diamond　crops；　which　are　ordered
to　be　set　a…new；　so　that　it　won't　be　his　fault　if　I　do　not
glitter　among　the　stars　of　the　fourth　or　fifth　magnitude。　I　wish
my　weak　head　may　not　grow　giddy　in　the　midst　of　all　this
gallantry　and　dissipation；　though；　as　yet；　I　can　safely　declare；
I　could　gladly　give　up　all　these　tumultuous　pleasures；　for
country　solitude；　and　a　happy　retreat　with　those　we　love；　among
whom；　my　dear　Willis　will　always　possess　the　first　place　in　the
breast　of　her

Ever　affectionate；
LYDIA　MELFORD
LONDON；　May　31。



To　Sir　WATKIN　PHILLIPS；　of　Jesus　college；　Oxon。

DEAR　PHILLIPS；

I　send　you　this　letter；　franked　by　our　old　friend　Barton；　who　is
as　much　altered　as　it　was　possible　for　a　man　of　his　kidney　to　be。
Instead　of　the　careless；　indolent　sloven　we　knew　at　Oxford；　I
found　him　a　busy　talkative　politician；　a　petit…maitre　in　his
dress；　and　a　ceremonious　courtier　in　his　manners。　He　has　not　gall
enough　in　his　constitution　to　be　enflamed　with　the　rancour　of
party；　so　as　to　deal　in　scurrilous　invectives；　but；　since　he
obtained　a　place；　he　is　become　a　warm　partizan　of　the　ministry；
and　sees　every　thing　through　such　an　exaggerating　medium；　as　to
me；　who　am　happily　of　no　party；　is　altogether　incomprehensible　
Without　all　doubt；　the　fumes　of　faction　not　only　disturb　the
faculty　of　reason；　but　also　pervert　the　organs　of　sense；　and　I
would　lay　a　hundred　guineas　to　ten；　that　if　Barton　on　one　side；
and　the　most　conscientious　patriot　in　the　opposition　on　the
other；　were　to　draw；　upon　honour；　the　picture　of　the　k＇ing＇　or
m＇inisters＇；　you　and　I；　who　are　still　uninfected；　and　unbiased；
would　find　both　painters　equally　distant　from　the　truth。　One
thing；　however；　must　be　allowed　for　the　honour　of　Barton；　he
never　breaks　out　into　illiberal　abuse；　far　less　endeavours；　by
infamous　calumnies；　to　blast　the　moral　character　of　any
individual　on　the　other　side。

Ever　since　we　came　hither；　he　has　been　remarkably　assiduous　in
his　attention　to　our　family；　an　attention；　which；　in　a　man　of　his
indolence　and　avocations；　I　should　have　thought　altogether　odd；
and　even　unnatural；　had　not　I　perceived　that　my　sister　Liddy　had
made　some　impression　upon　his　heart。　I　cannot　say　that　I　have　any
objection　to　his　trying　his　fortune　in　this　pursuit：　if　an
opulent　estate　and　a　great　flock　of　good…nature　are　sufficient
qualifications　in　a　husband；　to　render　the　marriage…state　happy
for　life；　she　may　be　happy　with　Barton；　but；　I　imagine；　there　is
something　else　required　to　engage　and　secure　the　affection　of　a
woman　of　sense　and　delicacy：　something　which　nature　has　denied
our　friend　　Liddy　seems　to　be　of　the　same　opinion。　When　he
addresses　himself　to　her　in　discourse；　she　seems　to　listen　with
reluctance；　and　industriously　avoids　all　particular
communication；　but　in　proportion　to　her　coyness；　our　aunt　is
coming。　Mrs　Tabitha　goes　more　than　half　way　to　meet　his　advances；
she　mistakes；　or　affects　to　mistake；　the　meaning　of　his　courtesy；
which　is　rather　formal　and　fulsome；　she　returns　his　compliments
with　hyperbolical　interest；　she　persecutes　him　with　her
civilities　at　table；　she　appeals　to　him　for　ever　in　conversation；
she　sighs；　and　flirts；　and　ogles；　and　by　her　hideous　affectation
and　impertinence；　drives　the　poor　courtier　to　the　very　extremity
of　his　complaisance；　in　short；　she　seems　to　have　undertaken　the
siege　of　Barton's　heart；　and　carries　on　her　approaches　in　such　a
desperate　manner；　that　I　don't　know　whether　he　will　not　be
obliged　to　capitulate。　In　the　mean　time；　his　aversion　to　this
inamorata　struggling　with　his　acquired　affability；　and　his
natural　fear　of　giving　offence；　throws　him　into　a　kind　of
distress　which　is　extremely　ridiculous。

Two　days　ago；　he　persuaded　my　uncle　and　me　to　accompany　him　to　St
James's；　where　he　undertook　to　make　us　acquainted　with　the
persons　of　all　the　great　men　in　the　kingdom；　and；　indeed；　there
was　a　great　assemblage　of　distinguished　characters；　for　it　was　a
high　festival　at　court。　Our　conductor　performed　his　promise　with
great　punctuality。　He　pointed　out　almost　every　individual　of　both
sexes；　and　generally　introduced　them　to　our　notice；　with　a
flourish　of　panegyrick　　Seeing　the　king　approach；　'There　comes
（said　he）　the　most　amiable　sovereign　that　ever　swayed　the　sceptre
of　England：　the　delicioe　humani　generis；　Augustus；　in　patronizing
merit；　Titus　Vespasian　in　generosity；　Trajan　in　beneficence；　and
Marcus　Aurelius　in　philosophy。'　'A　very　honest　kind　hearted
gentleman　（added　my　uncle）　he's　too　good　for　the　times。　A　king　of
England　should　have　a　spice　of　the　devil　in　his　composition。'
Barton；　then　turning　to　the　duke　of　C＇umberla